SUIS TERRITORY

The cool water had done its job. I allowed my sore muscles to unwind as the soothing river cradled me. The previously inflamed redness of my skin was gone. I surrendered to the force of the water enveloping me and my naked body. As I emerged from the refreshing embrace, I could still spot the faint marks of bruises on my legs.

Members from the pack are already there to meet me on the banks after putting back on my tattered clothes.  It is the Alpha who escorts me to the clearing. I know my role. My entire pack's attention is focused on me as I kneel in the center, ready for what's surely to come. I deserve all of it.

because I am weak

There is no possibility that I will become a werewolf, regardless of what the clan elders thought. Every day I will be reminded that I don't belong. And as Saphira screams and attacks me, I won't fight back. Because I'm as good as dead anyway.

"Come on! You pathetic piece of scum!" She screams, but I'm no longer listening. The air is thick with the metallic stench of my blood, as the Luna works harder to get a reaction out of me. It's bright scarlet shade another reminder that I am not one of them.

"You are a disgrace to this pack!"

Her claws slash my back tearing my worn clothes easily to shreds. I clutch my chest and brace for the next blow. Other members watch, and the pups peek from behind their mother's skirts. I was an example of what happens when you are weak. Though the beatings no longer hurt, in my clan having no wolf is a disease.

"No more Saphira!" shouts Falcon, the pack's Alpha and Saphira's mate.

"That's enough training for the day." He continues while gently pulling her off of me. Coal, the pack's Beta laughs. "I don't know Saphira, she almost had you."

There was a time when Coal and Falcon were my best friends. We'd play all midsummer in the meadows I was found at as a babe until the stars fell through the sky. Then shifting season came and I didn't shift. Since Falcon and Coal were high-ranked they couldn't be associated with someone with a lower status let alone maintain a friendship. After they acquired their ranks and found their mates, they ignored me, but as time passed, I lost all relevance.

No parents, No mate, No wolf, No friends. A pathetic excuse to the mighty moon.

It's what I deserve

As they left out the clearing, Saphira made a point to kick me in my side. The one thing I haven't allowed myself to do is to cry in front of them. I have embraced the pain. Most of the pack members thought that if I was brutally beaten, my wolf would eventually come to save me, but four years later and nothing.

  "Stupid Human." She muttered, linking hands back with Falcon.

Falcon's chestnut eyes met mine, and an emotion flickered in his eyes before they hardened again. "Do you have a Fucking eye problem?"

His jaw clenched as I shook my head, and I placed my eyes back on the ground.

"Good," he growled, and the rest of the spectators left the scene along with them.

I pulled myself from the ground and limped to my quarters.  Once a run-down tool shed, now held my life's possessions. It wasn't much. My cot from a child, some clothes, and a single book. It missed most of its pages, I never knew the title. But it provided me comfort to read the few pages it did have. By the time I am inside and changed my garments, my wounds have begun to heal and by evening I had no scars. My body is the one thing I know loves me. It has never allowed me to be hurt for too long.

The next morning I'm awake before the rest of the pack. Falcon assigned me to be the pack house's helper. Most mornings I wait for the command of Saphira to give me my duties, usually, she sends a pup or letter of all my chores for the day. But, I have done the duties for a while and memorized what is expected. The wolves always eat breakfast. I collect the eggs, milk the goats,  and prepare the porridge. The garden has wild strawberries which Coal has a sweet affliction towards. The pack elders hate spices of any kind so I make sure not to include them in their meals. I do everything around here, the cooking, the cleaning, I even watch the pups so that their parents can hunt. Some days, I would prefer my wolf trainings instead.

Being half-human wasn't so bad when I was younger. The other pups—so sure of their strength, boasting of their keen hearing and sharp sense of smell—didn't intimidate me then. Back then, I didn't care about those things, and neither did Coal or Falcon. We were young, unburdened by the weight of expectations. But those days were long gone. Now, the reality of my existence—half-wolf, half-human—was a curse, a sentence to a life of constant pain and rejection.

Living in this pack, under the thumb of those who despised me, had been my hell for years. Every day was a reminder that I was different, that I didn't belong in either the world of humans or wolves. I was an outcast in both, doomed to never fit in, or to be accepted. My mother had paid the ultimate price for my existence, and I was left to bear the brunt of both communities' hatred. They would foam at the mouth to harm me, to rid the world of the abomination they saw me as.

Saphira, the Luna, was from the Volos territory. She had met Falcon at a Lunar ceremony, and though she came to live here, she never truly accepted our pack—or me. She would tell stories of the Volos clan, of their strength, their cruelty, their utter lack of mercy. Compared to them, our clan was weak, she said, and she resented it. But what she hated most was me, the half-breed that threatened the purity and strength of the pack. With the outside world so cruel, I feared that this clan—this hell—was the best I would ever get. To be a werewolf was to know pain, to live with it. I was drowning in it. Every day, I wondered how much more I could take, how much longer I could endure the torment. I didn't belong here, but where else could I go? The humans feared these lands for the beasts that prowl, and the wolves loathed me. There was no place in this world for someone like me.

I pushed the thoughts away as I made my way into the kitchen, focusing on the task at hand. The ingredients were laid out before me:

Dried fish. Eggs. A large bowl of porridge. A pot of stewed rabbit.

 The dew hadn't yet left the grass, and already I was exhausted. As the Weres piled into the dining hall, I began to lay out the food on the large table. I could feel their eyes on me, the stares that never seemed to waver, as if they were waiting for me to snap, to reveal the beast they believed lurked beneath my skin.

I was different. And in this world, different wasn't just bad—it was dangerous.

"She smells funny," one of the pups muttered, and the pack erupted into howls of laughter. Their cruelty was a blade, sharp and unyielding, cutting me deeper with every word. I bit down in the inside of my cheek.

"Mind your tongue, pup," Coal scolded, though there was a smile on his lips, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"How come she doesn't bathe?" the pup continued, his innocent tone a stark contrast to the malice in his words.

"The same reason why trash doesn't," Saphira replied, her smirk widening as she glanced at me. Falcon, the alpha, avoided my gaze, but I could feel his eyes on me, could sense his discomfort."Don't worry," Saphira added with a laugh, "we'll find a way to take the trash out."

Her words sent a shiver down my spine, but I forced myself to remain calm, to keep moving, to ignore the eyes that bore into me. I continued to pass out the food, my hands trembling slightly as I placed the dishes before them. I watched as the pack ate, their hunger a stark contrast to the emptiness gnawing at my own stomach.

The dishes were piled high, a mountain of work that loomed before me. My neck strained as I looked up at the towering stack, knowing it would take hours to wash them all. My stomach growled, loud and insistent, reminding me that I hadn't eaten since the night before. But I had no time to stop, no time to sit and eat like the others. I was not permitted to eat with the pack, and I would never dare take food from their mouths.

I took the dishes to the nearby stream to wash them, catching a glimpse of my reflection in the water. My midnight hair hung limp against my pale skin, a stark contrast to the white clouds above. My black eyes, sunken and hollow, stared back at me. My clothes were tattered, hanging off me in some places, too tight in others. I was a shadow of the girl I once was, the girl who still held onto the foolish hope that one day, my mate would come and save me from this misery. But as the days turned into years, that hope had faded, leaving only a small, flickering ember that I clung to out of sheer desperation.

If my mate existed, how could he find me? My wolf was dormant, hidden deep within, too weak to emerge, too weak to call out to him. I wasn't wolf enough to attract a mate, and without that bond, I was alone—truly, utterly alone.

As I finished the dishes, my body ached with exhaustion. I was already so tired, and the day had barely begun. Soon, Cassandra would call for lunch, and I would have to start all over again. My days never ended; they bled into one another, a never-ending cycle of pain and servitude. I was halfway down the hallway, mop and bucket in hand, when I heard something that made my heart skip a beat.

"There are raids. We cannot afford to have weakness among us." Saphira's voice was a harsh whisper, but I heard every word, clear as day. She was speaking to Falcon, just beyond the council door.

A terrible feeling overcame me, a dread that settled deep in my bones."Do you speak of a true threat?" Yugen, our elder, asked, his voice calm but questioning. To bring something to the council, it had to be serious—a true concern. My heart pounded in my chest. What was this about?

"I know what it's like," Saphira continued, her tone sharp. "Beyond the perimeter, there are dangers you all have never seen. Rogues, trackers, abominable beasts. If Bones, The Hoarde, Nikolai or Drakos come through, do you think we would stand a chance against them? We need all the strength we can muster."

"We are strong," Falcon replied, his voice steady, but there was a note of doubt.

"We could be stronger," Saphira growled, her frustration palpable. "She's a distraction, and when the true threat comes, we won't be prepared."

"What do you suggest, Luna?" Yugen's voice was low, but there was a weight to his words.

"Kill her."

My heart stopped. The world seemed to tilt on its axis, the weight of her words crashing down on me like a tidal wave."Saphir—" Falcon began, but she cut him off with a snarl.

"You love her. You always stand up for the poor girl."

"Of course not," Falcon protested. "You are my mate. I would die for you."

"That would be of no use. I need you to kill for me," Saphira hissed, her voice laced with venom. "...unless you don't think you can?"

Silence.

"Prove to me you don't have eyes for the girl."

Silence.

"I will do it," Falcon finally said, his voice weak, a shadow of the terror he appeared earlier.

"It is decided," Yugen's voice was final, the decision made.

The mop slipped from my grasp, nearly clattering to the floor, but I caught it just in time. My chest tightened, my breaths coming in short, shallow gasps. They were going to kill me. The realization hit me like a blow to the gut, but I refused to give in to the fear. 

I would not die—not like this, not by their hands.If I wanted to survive, I had to act, and I had to act now. I carefully retreated, the mop and bucket clutched in my trembling hands as I made my way back to my tattered home. My mind raced as I stuffed everything I could find into an old, ratty sac. I couldn't stay here; I had to leave before they could carry out their plan.

I lay back on my bed, staring up at the cracked ceiling as I tried to form a plan. Where could I go? How would I survive? The warm air made the goat's milk I had gathered earlier curdle, the sour smell filling the small space. My mind was a whirlwind of fear and desperation, but one thought stood out above all the rest: I didn't want to die.

Stuffing the sac under my dress, I made my way back downstairs, my heart pounding in my chest. I would wait until everyone was in the dining hall for lunch—until they were distracted, their patrols down. Eating usually lasted about an hour, so I would have to run faster than I ever ran in my life.

"Where were you?! I posted the note ten minutes ago and you haven't even started" Coal's mate screeched when I entered the hall for my final time.

"I was dusting the main hall." I murmured, taking the note between my fingers.

She took a step closer, invading every each of my personal space. Her red raspberry-colored lips were contorted into an ugly thin line.

"I am the beta female, I can ruin you with a snap of my fingers, Don't ever be late again."

Nodding my head, I backed up away from her. This will be the very last time...the last time I would be a slave to this pack.

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