Antonio

"What is it?" Tossing a half-eaten sandwich, I turned to face Agustin. He leaned at the entrance of my study, his eyebrows touching his hairline.

"Nothing," he shrugged. With Agustin, it was never nothing. All I needed was to be patient. "Actually, there is something." Waltzing in, he plopped into the chair. "You haven't picked your wedding suit yet."

Agustin tapped his fingers over my table, his excitement growing with each beat. Maria must have set him up for the task. She knew I rarely got mad at him.

"I don't need a suit. I have one from my previous wedding."

Agustin's face shriveled like a raisin. He walked out, shoving the door close in his wake. Bang. I counted the seconds in my mind before Maria's entry. Like clockwork, she walked in with a pouting Agustin trailing beside her. Maria and Agustin were the Bonnie and Clyde in a mother and son form - always helping each other's devious plans.

Maria's longing to bear a daughter was partially fulfilled when she had delivered this mama's boy. While Alejandro and I grew up in time, Agustin stayed as a kid. Don't get me wrong - Agustin was ruthless when needed. I have seen him chop open a man with a meat cleaver with no remorse on his face. Yet, when it involved maamá's needs, he changed his personality like clothing.

"Que le dijiste a Agustin?" *What did you say to Agustin* Maria's anger warmed the room. She walked around, her nostrils flaring and eyes blinking constantly. Taking her usual seat, she sighed, her hands anchored into her set hair. "What will I do with you?"

I don't know. Leave me alone.

Lowering the laptop flap, I rested my face over my knuckles. "I told Agustin, I don't need a suit. Already have one."

Maria got up, tossing the chair backwards. A soft bang when her palms landed over my table. "¿Estás loco?" Walking around the room, she grunted. "Do you want this marriage to also...."

Palming her mouth, she halted both in words and steps. My mouth soured by her unspoken words, my vision heated watching her sunken face.

Certain things were prohibited from discussion in the Moralez household - where Alejandro went every weekend, when would Agustin graduate or anything close to Elena was an untouchable topic.

Maria crossed that line today, almost.

My parents wanted to ensure the Moralez firstborn had an heir. It would display our strength, having a child and a woman by my side. According to Maria, there were many suitable candidates. I wanted none. None would fit the mold.

Elena was the love of my life, the mother of my unborn child. Nobody knew that except for me, the secret which she carried to her grave.

My teeth powdered as I moved across the room and I towered over Maria. "If Valentina is fine marrying a widower, then she wouldn't have a problem with what I wear."

Not waiting for her to build her defense, I walked outside while Maria's footsteps followed me. A long, deep breath calmed the boil I felt inside, running its course under my skin and veins. Every time I remembered Elena, I fell into a bottomless pit of despair. A dark place where I couldn't heave for air or call for help.

In the past, Maria had made many good decisions. But the one about my second marriage and choosing Valentina to be her new daughter-in-law was wrong. A woman like Val was best paired with anyone who loved a challenge. Since Agustin met her, he was smitten. He gushed and giggled about the olive-skinned siren, enchanted by her appearance. My brother had a hard time controlling his tent from rising every time he thought about her.

From the age of five, I had known Valentina. Like Elena, her mother too was killed by a rival cartel. I only hoped that both Val and her father both knew what they were getting into.

With that thought, I turned around, bringing my mother and brother to a screeching halt. "Does this girl know about Elena?"

Agustin's nodded. "I told her everything."

I couldn't wrap my head around was the reason for Valentina's acceptance to marry a widower. There were better suitors, men who wanted her as their wife. She was a recurring topic brought up by our allies - hoping one of them was lucky to have her even if for a night.

~

Gabriel knocked at my office door, walking in. I had asked for his help to know about Ramirez' financial records. Gabriel placed a thick file on my table, neatly labelled with bookmarks and additional evidence. Running my eyes over the information, my mouth came unhinged.

"Valentina ran their business! I had always assumed it to be Ramon Ramirez," I said. There was no restriction on a woman running a cartel but in the last few decades most of them gave up the reins to men. But not the Ramirez. "And how did I not know about it?"

"Ramon didn't bring her to any meetings, Anto. She managed everything from behind closed doors while her father kept up appearances. It seems her uncle, Rodrigo, taught her everything. Business, bloodshed, you name it."

"She isn't what she seems."

A smirk appeared on Gabriel's tanned face, alighting his mossy eyes. He picked himself up, opening and shutting the cabinet doors. Placing stacks of papers on my table, he tapped his soot laden fingers on them. "This is everything I had found about her."

Valentina's looks remained a topic in every cartel meeting. Yet, none of us knew there was another side to her. One, which was evidenced on every document I laid eyes on. Valentina was a madwoman, ruthless and cunning both in business and things she wanted.

"She is calculative, Anto," Gabriel murmured, his tone lowered and head dipped into his chest. "She went bridal dress shopping with mama."

My brows bridged together, eying photos of hers which Gabriel had assembled. A sultry smile and dewy, dusky tone called out to me. They held a siren's tune, luring lost men. I knew I had to be careful. She was a two-faced vixen and I had a pack to protect.

"Maria doesn't know how to evaluate people," I said, looking at Gabriel. He cared for Maria like his mother, so everything about her made him worry. "Find everything about Valentina. Follow her like a predator."

"Should I be concerned? Is there some problem?"

I nodded a no. He didn't have to worry, yet.

The Ramirez were a bunch of tough-skinned people who wouldn't go down without a fight. I remembered my father telling me about the famous Rodrigo Ramirez - Ramon's brother who made the Ramirez business what it was. Till his death, he fought hard to keep their business secure.

So Ramon's willingness to let go of his business without any protest pricked my gut. He happily signed his business over, agreeing to all our terms without any negotiations. He didn't have any conditions on how we ran it nor did he display any remorse. Hell, he threw his daughter too in the deal.

My spine dwindled, rattling like a cloth in the wind. It seemed we'd gotten ourselves a pet cobra. It was only a matter of time before it turned on us.

~

When I walked in, the mansion was silent. Normally the place would welcome me with echoes of Maria yelling out instructions at our staff. Today, everything was calm.

I sat at the bar, uncorking a bottle of whiskey and pouring myself a generous amount. Dad walked out of his study, his gaze landing on me.

"Tough day?" he asked.

"Which day isn't?"

Slinked into the barstool, he poured himself a drink, clinking the tip of my glass. "Your mother isn't happy."

"Let me guess? It's about the suit?"

He smiled, sipping the amber-colored liquid. "Get one for her. Make her happy."

I knew what he meant. Elena and I had a court marriage. Although Maria loved her like her daughter, she never forgave her for tempting me to not involve our family.

This marriage was Maria's do-over. She wanted everything perfect.

"I already made her happy by agreeing to this marriage. She is not going to take away the one thing which means the world to me."

"I will tell her." Dad put up a half-smile, patting my back. "But if she asks you for anything else, you'll have to give it to her."

"The heir...I will give it, eventually. I am marrying for Maria's sake, dad. Now she should be happy." Sounding desperate, I leaned forward to where he stood. "I might even get a new suit to calm her down but the chances of me wearing the other one is high."

Rebelling against my mother for my second marriage felt cathartic.

Carlos got up, gulping the contents of his glass. "It's not the suit that is the problem, son. It's the part that you still haven't let her go. Elena isn't coming back and you have to make peace with it."

Saying that he left.

My life was destroyed two years ago. Why would I want to make peace with it? I lost my wife, my life's anchor and the mother of my...

Tears welled up. I shut my eyelids tightly, letting them drain. Warm drops travelled down my face and trickled on the floor.

Every part of me ached while revisiting Elena's memories, especially one. Those which reminded me of my incapability in protecting her. I failed in the vows I made. Death did us apart.

Blinking hard, I cleared my vision and wiped my face with my sleeves. Yet, the pain in my chest remained.

I was wrong to underestimate Maria's plan, presuming she wanted another woman in the house to give her company. Maria had cunningly ensured I suffered every day, thinking about Elena. She was tying my hands and forcing me to move on. But her designs to toss Elena out of my mind had a major flaw.

I had vowed to love Elena unconditionally and I would continue to do so.

My devotion towards her was like breathing. Involuntary and wouldn't stop till my last breath.

~

Dearies

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