Here's a random Sherlock one-shot for Anna_Thordaughter 's one-shot contest :) 

He knew it. He knew as soon as she was born, a beautiful hazel eyed baby girl, that this was it. Funnily enough, it was like retirement.

Retirement with your first child, that is.

"Congratulations," the white-robed doctor said cheerfully.

"Yeah, thanks," John answered, looking fondly at his wife and daughter. "My darling, you are wonderful."

Mary gazed up at him, inexplicable happiness in her eyes.

"Do you want to call Sherlock and tell him?" she asked. "Don't you think he ought to--"

John's phone buzzed in his pocket, and as he reached to pull it out of his pocket, he knew who it was.

Congrats.

SH

"Of course he already knew," John muttered.

Mary laughed softly. "Of course he did."

John replied,

You're 7 and a half minutes late

A few seconds later, his phone buzzed again.

Thought I'd let you get the sappiness out for a few minutes

SH

John rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to hold her?" Mary asked tiredly.

"Of course I do," he said, tenderly taking the baby into his arms. She didn't say a word and simply looked at him.

Are you my father? she seemed to say.

John swelled with pride. "Yes, I am," he whispered.

"What?" Mary asked.

"I'm her dad," he said giddily.

"Glad you've figured that out," Mary teased.

"We can take her home, and she can see Baker Street and Ms. Hudson," John said.

"Official business, having children," Mary said with a yawn. She turned to look at the pink-wrapped bundle. "We'll have to stay here for a while, won't we, darling?"

"Then I," John proclaimed, "am staying. The whole time. It's un-negotiable."

"Don't make promises you can't keep," Mary said.

"I think I can keep this one," John said, sinking into the white sheets.

"Sir, official visiting hours have ended," announced the doctor. "Your wife is tired and needs rest. You can visit tomorrow morning."

"I don't think...I'm actually a doctor myself," John said pointedly.

"Very good sir, and I'm the Duke of Wales," answered the doctor, evidently annoyed.

"No, really," John insisted. "She's my wife. Aren't hospitals required to let the husband stay?"

"For the birth only," he declared. "It is necessary to our protocols to have a full and speedy recovery, without distraction."

"I'm not a--" John blustered.

"Save your pride, Mr. Watson," Mary said with a vain attempt at concealing laughter.

"I will see you as early as this practice opens," John said. "With any luck, that promise is on the right side of the law."

He shot a mental glare at the doctor, and closed the door softly behind him.

He had scarcely walked in the door of his and Mary's apartment when John heard his phone buzz again.

Baker Street.

SH

He frowned, typing on the small screen.  Are you serious? My wife just had a baby!

Now.

SH

He sighed, gritting his teeth. God, Sherlock, it's nice to have no feelings when you're on a case but this is too much, he thought irritably.

Sherlock heard the door slam.

"I discovered that the real reason the man was acting so bizarrely is because he was concealing the fact that--"

"Shut up." John stood in the doorway.

"No, I'm not done," Sherlock answered.

"Look, Sherlock, I don't care, okay?" John said tiredly.

He did look tired, with deep ravines under his eyes indicating he had waited up all night with Mary at the hospital.

"You haven't had breakfast," Sherlock observed. "Or lunch. Or supper. There's toast."

"I don't need your toast, I need you to listen to me," John said. "I have a beautiful baby girl, Sherlock."

"I am well aware of that, as you know," Sherlock said pointedly. "Hooray, congrats, now get over here and help me with this. Why did the man--"

"No," John said quietly.

"What do you mean, 'no'? I haven't even asked the question!" Sherlock said irritably.

"I can't," John said. "Not anymore."

"Don't be ridiculous, John," Sherlock said, throwing up his hands. "Honestly, it's a baby, not a nuclear missile. Just help me with this and by the time it's over you can go see your progeny."

John shook his head disbelievingly. "Did you just say 'progeny'?" asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes I did, get your judgemental self over here, you're blocking the doorway," Sherlock gestured towards the door.

"For the last time..." John grumbled.

"Yes, you know what maybe it is," Sherlock exclaimed. "Great. Now why did the man conceal his affair if he knew that the wife knew already?"

"Because she...was pretending she didn't know?" John furrowed his brow.

"Then why would she? Most wives would go after them."

"Maybe she wasn't 'most wives'," John said in a preoccupied way. "She could have been trying to get him to come back to her."

"Why?" Sherlock said, puzzled for once.

"Because she loved him!" John said, annoyed. "Obviously."

"If she loved him, she would have trusted him enough to go away for holiday without her," Sherlock pointed out. "Instead of following him."

"She was suspicious," John protested.

"The man was found dead, stabbed by a criminal gang outside Cornwall," Sherlock reminded him, "This had a lot more to do with what he wasn't doing that what he was doing."

"But what about the affair?" John asked.

"Distraction," he shrugged. "Easy ploy to bribe people."

"That doesn't settle the fact that--"

He was cut off as Ms. Hudson knocked on the doorframe.

"Boys," she said beaming. "And John! Congratulations, you must be so proud."

Sherlock rolled his eyes.

"Thank you," John said. "Yes, I am. She's a little miracle, Ms. Hudson, I can't wait for you to meet her."

"Oh, I'm sure she's lovely, dear," she said fondly. "Sherlock, thank you for telling me."

"You're welcome, Ms. Hudson," Sherlock said in a bored voice. "You know how I love to be informed."

"Well, I'll leave you to it," she said brightly. "Shout if you need anything."

She hurried down the stairs, humming softy.

"Will do," Sherlock said carelessly. "Now, John--"

"Hold on, let me call Mary," John said suddenly.

"Don't start, she's probably sleeping," Sherlock said crossly.

"You just don't want me to call her."

"Of course I want you to call her," he said exasperatedly. "But she's fine, and I'm not."

"You're not?" John said skeptically. "What's the matter now, you run out of crime scenes to look at? Did Molly slap you again? Oh, wait, you're just mad because I have a real life."

"Where is this coming from?" Sherlock asked, somewhat surprised, "Call her. I don't care in the slightest."

"I will." John said, standing up to dial. "Mary?"

"John, I was sleeping," a reproachful voice said from the other end of the phone.

"Told you," Sherlock muttered, looking at the computer screen.

"Sorry, I had to know how you were doing," John said. "Are you okay? How's the baby?"

"She's fine," Mary said drowsily. "Go to sleep, it's late, and you haven't slept since yesterday night."

"I will," John said.

"Tell Sherlock hello," she added. "Love you."

"Love you too." John pressed "End" and turned around to face him.

"How does she know where I am?" John said incredulously.

"Come on, John, it's obvious," Sherlock intoned. "Where else would you be? Out having a 'real life'?"

John sighed.

"Fine." he said.

Ms. Hudson appeared in the doorway again.

"Ms. Hudson," Sherlock said irritably. "Do you know, I'm trying to work around here."

"Sorry, Sherlock," she said apologetically. "But John, dear, I've got your room all made up. Good night!"

She scampered down the stairs again.

"I have to get up early to visit Mary," John said abruptly. "Night."

"Fine, don't help me," Sherlock scowled after him.

"I already did," John yelled back. "For, like, five years!"

Sherlock furrowed his brow and continued reading.

"John," he called, when the clock read 7:00 AM.

Ms. Hudson trotted up the stairs bearing a tea-tray.

"Ms. Hudson," Sherlock said brusquely, "Where is John?"

"He did say he was going to see Mary," she reminded him. "He left an hour ago."

"Didn't even say goodbye," he scowled, sipping a cup of tea. He stood up. "The hospital doesn't even open for visitors until eight," he added. "Why on earth did he leave an hour early? It's not like he's going to be let in early just to see his baby. The baby is fine! All they do is cry and take up space!"

"Sherlock!" Ms. Hudson reprimanded sternly. "You wouldn't understand, you don't have one!"

"Well neither do you," he said nastily. "I'm going for a walk."

As soon as the chill air hit his face, he took a left turn instead of the usual right. "Two can play this game, John," he muttered under his breath.

John stood at the door of his apartment, a giddy smile on his face. Mary wasn't awake, but they let him see the baby. She had been the only one in the maternity ward who looked around solemnly, not crying, taking all of it in. He fumbled with the keys and the door swung open.

"Fancy seeing you here," remarked Sherlock. He was sitting with his legs crossed on John's couch.

"Do you ever knock like a regular person?" John scowled. His chipper mood had all but evaporated. It was a puzzle to think why he always was so irked with Sherlock these days.

"I'm not a regular person," Sherlock said mildly. "Are you sure you're fine? Because you never wake up early."

"I have more commitments that usual," John intoned. "I'm glad you're here because I wanted to tell you something."

"Do you now," Sherlock mused. "Is this about last night's case?"

"Maybe it is," John said. "I think it's over."

"What's over?" Sherlock asked interestedly, although John knew very well that he was perfectly aware of what he meant.

"Sherlock--I can't just--I have to be with my family. I'm not going to come running to Baker Street every time you've run out of jam or had a fight with Lestrade or even for a case. I'm not, okay? I can't drag my family into this." John threw up his hands.

"Well you seem upset," observed Sherlock. "Are you upset you can't or are you upset you're telling me this?"

"All of them at once, I suppose," he said grimly. "Sorry, Sherlock. That was the last time."

"Well I'm touched," he said. "Next time you break up with someone you should take them out for coffee."

"Wha--" John started, dumbfounded. "I wasn't breaking up--"

"Come on, John," Sherlock rolled his eyes. "It's an expression. Since you obviously have so much more to life now, I'll be going. I daresay I won't be seeing you."

He smiled and waved before slamming the door shut.

John sat on the couch with a shudder, his head in his hands.

He had to do it. Had to give up something that had brought him back to life.

But now he had another life to take care of. He slunk upstairs, just as Sherlock looked up at John's window from the street below.

"Goodbye, John," he whispered. He turned up his coat collar and walked back to Baker Street alone.