A/N: Translated from clarafee_malfoy 's french book 'Le Journal Incomplet de Clara-Fée Malfoy'

Dear diary,

I know, it's really cliche and stupid to write in a diary but I thought that maybe, just maybe, my emotions would feel less painful if I shared them. The only problem is that I don't want to talk to anybody and I can't trust anyone in this crazy world. In the end, my mom bought you a while ago so I said why not. I think I'll give you a name, just to make this even more cliche. Well, since I don't know if you are a male or female, I will call you Gudule.

Hello Gudule, my name is Malfoy, Clara-Fee Malfoy. I am thirteen years old and I am a Slytherin at Hogwarts. I have a twelve year old brother who's name is Draco and my parents are Lucius Malfoy and Narcissa Malfoy nee Black. My best friend's name is Capucine Zabini and she is eleven years old. She has an older brother named Blaise and between us, I find him really hot. But don't tell him! It's a secret! He is the same age as Dray and I am one of his good friends. But sadly, I know he doesn't like me the same way I like him. Who would want someone like me, a girl who is weak, ugly and dirty?

Anyways, I don't care about my emotions anymore. Instead, I leave an empty void just like my father says to do. Here's where everything changes and where I am sure you are going to leave me.

My father, Lucius Malfoy, is one of the Dark Lord's most faithful and loyal Death Eaters and I am destined to become like him is three years.

Go ahead, laugh at me, loath me, abandon me, forget me like everyone else I've met. Nobody loves me and I don't love myself either. But I try to stay strong anyways.

I am empty and broken inside. Ever since I was a child, my dad would mistreat me. He hits me, calls me all sorts of names and he whips me to. Nobody has seen my back, not even my brother. I want nobody to see how weak I am. He is a wizard, a strong one too so it is normal for him to regularly throw Crucios at my continuously.

Be careful, fight, you have to tell yourself. Gudule help me, I can't. I have already tried, trust me but every time I try, he shows me that it is impossible to fight back and that he has a lot of power over me. One time, You-Know-Who came over for a Death Eater meeting and he came by my room. I can tell you Gudule, he isn't really pretty, and that's without looking at his eyes. He is milky white and his nostrils look flattened. He seems to be missing his nose. His eyes, oh they can give you nightmares for weeks... two red slits. He came to talk to me about how my father is treating me, how he feeds me, how he gives me gives me clothes. Anyways, all this rambling to say that I need to obey him more like the ungrateful thing I am.I learnt fast and against my will to do dark magic. How to obey and bow down to him.

That's all for today. I am far from done writing about my problems Gudule but I have to know that I can fully trust and confide in you before I can spill my biggest secret of all time that nobody knows about. Not even my brother or my best friend. Nobody knows about it except maybe a couple of Death Eaters.

Talk to you soon, C-F Malfoy