A/N: Trigger warning of suicide. If you can't read that, then you shouldn't read it past this part... It's a major plot point. Sorry! Anyways, onto the story...

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"There's no chance for us, it's all decided for us. This world has only one sweet moment set aside for us." Who Wants to Live Forever by Queen

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"Hey, Crowley?" you ask. You just realized you forgot a few things at home, and with Armageddon coming and all, you should probably have them. Just in case.

"Yeah?"

"Uh. I forgot my gun and notebook."

He snaps and they're both sitting in your lap, the gun in its holster.

"Teleportation is relatively easy."

"Okay, thanks." You strap the gun to your waist.

Aziraphale peeps up. "Good, we need a gun. We're going to have to kill the antichrist." That's... harsh. He probably doesn't even know that he has so much power, he just... deals with it and pretends that it doesn't exist.

Crowley sighs. "Okay, Aziraphale." The car stops. "Damn traffic... What's up with the M25-- oh. That's right. Um, Y/N?"

"Yeah...?" Your stomach twists.

"Buckle up, and please try not to die. I'll try my best to make sure you don't die, too."

"What?"

Suddenly, the car jolts forward. You look to your side at Crowley, who's smirking.

"What are you doing?"

Aziraphale sighs. "Just close your eyes and ignore everything happening outside."

"Okay." You close your eyes and focus on the feeling of the notebook in your hands, the impression of the prophecy etched into the paper.

And then the car gets hot. Not unbearable, but it's still insane for this time of year. Any time of year, actually. But again, somehow, you just feel the heat, not the pain or discomfort that this much heat would bring.

You open your eyes a crack and the world outside is bright orange. You look to Crowley again, who's looking particularly demonic right now. No wonder it's so hot in here.

"I told you not to open your eyes..." Aziraphale mumbles in a low voice only you can hear. If Crowley's the only reason you're still alive, then it's best not to bother him in case he's distracted.

So instead, you nod and squeeze your eyes shut, blocking the bright light from your eyes.

After a few minutes, the heat starts to cease. You open your eyes again, and now you, Aziraphale, and Crowley are through the wall of flame. Unfortunately, the car's still on fire, so...

You lean back in your seat.

Crowley speaks. "Aziraphale. Directions?"

Aziraphale takes control and guides Crowley to the airbase.

An old man, looking particularly grumpy as he walks his dog, stops to gape at the flaming Bentley. You grin and wave through the window as you pass by and he just stares.

After a while of driving through the woods, you come across a huge, fenced building.

You and Crowley get out and walk to the guard who's reading a book. (Quick A/N: In the TV show, he's reading American Gods by Neil Gaiman, one of the coauthors of the book version of Good Omens. So hooray for easter eggs! But he's not reading American Gods in this story, sorry. You'll understand why soon.)

As soon as he spots you two walk out of the car, he plops down the book, stands, and grabs his shotgun. You swallow down a lump in your throat as he speaks.

"What's your business here?" Crowley is the one to respond.

"Just let us in. It's important."

"Why's your car on fire?"

"Doesn't matter, let us in."

"No. I request that you leave." He points the gun at you both.

"Now, listen here, we need to--" the car explodes. Crowley runs to it and kneels by the debris, picking up a flaming tire iron.

"Crowley," Aziraphale says, "Now is not the time!"

"Leave me alone! I'm having a moment!" Aziraphale sighs as Crowley stands, putting the tire iron in his pocket.

"Leave now or I will shoot!" The guard disappears without a trace. 

Aziraphale says, "Oh, that was me. I do hope I've sent him somewhere nice..."

The gate opens and you all walk in. You take in the scene.

Four kids stand next to four adults.

One of the kids is a girl, the only one in the group. She's glaring at the adult with long, red hair and a sword. Aziraphale gasps at the sight of it.

The third of the kids has glasses and blonde hair. He's sneering at the tall, lean man with a short black beard holding a set of scales.

Another of the kids looks messy. His white t-shirt is stained with dirt and food. He's crossing his arms at a person, neither a man nor woman, wearing all white but with black stains covering their clothes. They have black eyes and have a crown on their head that's blacker than the darkest night.

The last boy, standing in front, has curly, golden hair. His eyes glimmer with something-- neither anger nor joy-- as he stares at the last, hooded figure.

You know, from your experience with Crowley and Aziraphale, that the four adults and the last boy with the golden hair aren't human. You don't know what they are, but you can feel something emanating off them.

The boy turns to look at you. He looks at you with a pain in his eyes. He turns away from the group and walks up to you.

Aziraphale whispers to you, "It's him! Shoot!" He takes control of your muscles and you pull out the gun, aiming it at his head. You're about to shoot.

In a wave of control, you shove your arm upwards and shoot into the sky.

"Aziraphale, no, don't!" you say, scolding the angel in your mind. The boy walks up to you and reaches out his hand.

In a flash, you suddenly feel dizzy and sick. The world spins and your mind goes completely blank. You can't help but sit on your knees as everything in the world shifts.

When you stand and look up, you feel alone in your mind again. To your side is Aziraphale.

"Sorry," the boy says. "Your mind is too strong. But look, now you're two people again. It's an awful thing, to have two minds in one body."

There's eye contact between you two, and he smiles. "There you go. Now come on! Have any ideas? We need to get rid of these four..."

Aziraphale's eyes widen. "Those other four are the four horsemen of the apocalypse... War, Famine, Pollution, and... Death. They're supposed to help you destroy the world. You want to get rid of them?"

"Of course. I rather like the world, and I don't want to see it go." He turns and runs back to the group. You turn to Crowley and Aziraphale.

"He had no divine intervention, nor demonic intervention. He's not good incarnate nor evil incarnate. He's just... incarnate."

"Good thing you didn't shoot him, then," Crowley responds.

Aziraphale looks sheepish. "Sorry..."

"It's fine," you assure him. "Come on, we should probably go."

So you three follow. You can't help but feel a pang of pride that you're here, now, understanding what's going on, rather than at a sucky job and a disgusting apartment.

"The broken one torn between two worlds shall has't restor'd faith."

"Now for introductions," the boy says. He gestures to the girl. "This is Pepper and War." He gestures to the tall, lean man and the kid with glasses. "This is Wensleydale and Famine." He gestures to the messiest pair. "This is Brian and Pollution."

Finally, he gestures to himself and the hooded figure. "And I'm Adam, and this is Death."

They all continue staring at each other, each side trying to figure out a way to beat the other. Finally, Pepper speaks.

"So, you're War?" The woman smiles and a shiver runs down your spine. She reminds you of a poisonous, beautiful flower in full bloom.

"Yes, I am."

Pepper glares at her. "Well, in that case, I believe in peace, bitch!"

And War is gone in a puff of smoke. The sword clatters to the ground. Aziraphale rushes over and scoops it up.

"I was wondering where you were..." Aziraphale murmurs.

Wensleydale faces Famine. "Well, if you're Famine, then I believe in lots of good food to eat. For everyone on Earth." And now Famine is gone in a puff of smoke. The scales drop and Crowley stops Wensleydale from trying to pick it up.

And Brian faces Pollution. "I believe in a clean world with nature and stuff." He smiles as Pollution also disintegrates, the crown falling to the ground. The darkness of it eases away and now it's silver.

Adam looks at Death. "You can go now. There's no way to stop death. But your friends are gone, so now you don't need to be here." After a moment, Death unfurls his wings of night, wings that were shapes cut through the matter of creation into the darkness underneath. And he's gone. But somehow, you can still feel his presence. It's unnerving. But then again, Death is always everywhere.

A moment of silence passes as the seven of you wrap your minds around what had just happened.

You then hear two voices come out from one of the buildings.

"So, that's that? No more war?" The first voice says. It's a man.

"Yes. The danger is over. Except for-- oh." The second voice belongs to a woman. You turn and see Anathema Device. She smiles when she sees you, then walks over.

"So," she says, "you defeated the horsemen?"

"No, they did," you say, pointing to the four kids. "But I saw it happen, and it was incredible."

"Good."

Aziraphale butts in. "Ah, I think we have trouble..."

You all turn and see a figure floating down from the sky and another sprout out of the ground like a plant.

The one that came from the sky is the man with purple eyes who was in Aziraphale's bookshop, claiming to be looking for pornography. But you don't recognize the person rising from the dirt with a giant fly on their head.

Crowley speaks. "Gabriel and Lord Beelzebub, what are you doing here?" Beelzebub speaks.

"We are here to tell the child to zztart Armageddon."

Adam looks indignant. "No."

Gabriel tries his hand. "Look, kid, we just need you to start it all up again. Can't you do that?"

"I can, but I won't."

"Your dad will be angry."

"Of course he will. I'm in an airbase without his permission."

"I mean your other dad."

Adam glares fiercely. "What other dad? I only have one. And his name is Mr. Young."

"What about your birth dad?"

"No. He can't just disappear my entire life then yell at me for not destroying the world!"

"Yes, he can. Look, all the angels in Heaven are going to be very upset. They were looking forward to the war." Adam just stares up at Gabriel with his arms crossed.

Beelzebub walks forward. "And all the demonzz in Hell can't wait for it to begin."

"I don't care."

Beelzebub looks up and the ground starts to shake. You stumble backward as a giant hole in the ground opens. And you see him. Well, you assume you see him. No one could look more like Satan. He growls at Adam, a roar so loud that you feel tremors in your bones. And when you blink, he's gone. Beelzebub and Gabriel glance at each other, worried.

In his place is a rickety car. A man clambers out.

"Adam, what are you doing here?" And then he's gone. Gabriel looks at Adam and explains.

"I sent him back home. We're still here, and we can't afford to have more people know what's going on."

"Then why don't you leave now?" Adam asks.

"Becauzze we ztill need zzomething," Beelzebub says.

"From who?"

"We need Aziraphale and Crowley. They've cauzed much trouble for uz, and they need to be dezztroyed." Beelzebub turns and looks at the two and you feel a pit in your stomach.

Adam walks up to them and starts talking.

"Why are you doing this? They're better than both of you!"

Gabriel responds before Beelzebub gets the chance. "We need to follow the Great Plan and the Devine Plan. The Great Plan states that Armageddon must be started."

"But does the Ineffable Plan say that?"

"They're... the same thing."

They continue arguing back and forth. Think of something, Y/N... Think of some way for them to not die and be able to stay on Earth...

"A sore decision shall arise between one f'r two 'r two f'r one."

And then an idea hits you. You shudder at the thought of it for many reasons, but it's the only way.

You work up as much courage as you can muster and you walk over to Gabriel and Beelzebub.

"Can we talk?" You hope they can't sense the absolute fear you have.

"Aren't you that girl who was in Aziraphale's bookstore?" Gabriel asks.

"I was. And let me just say-- you need to work on blending in with humans a lot more."

He looks slightly crestfallen. "Why? I thought I did well."

"Uh... Do you even know what pornography is?"

"No."

"Then I suggest you do some research before saying that you've come to buy some. Just for future reference. Anyways, can we... go..."

"Talk somewhere private?" 

"Yes." You glance back to Aziraphale and Crowley. They're staring at you, confused. You smile as best you can to try to ease their minds.

"Are you coming?" Beelzebub asks.

"Yes, sorry." And you walk quickly after them.

"Well? What izz it?" You try to find a way to explain. You remember what Crowley said to you.

"Gabriel. You're an angel. You can feel how much people... love, right?"

"Yes, I can," he replies.

"How much do Aziraphale and Crowley care for me?"

He looks towards them for a moment and smiles. It's small, and he quickly turns back to you.

"Quite a bit," he says.

"Well," you say, "My parents died at the same time a while ago. And it tore me apart. I would have much rather died, myself, then have them gone."

"What does this have to do with anything?"

Now for the moment of truth. "My soul for theirs? Please?" A beat. Beelzebub smiles and Gabriel looks sick.

"I like the way you think, human," Beelzebub tells you. "I agree. If Gabriel wazz truthful." You both look to him.

"Ah... Yes. That would be a fair trade."

Beelzebub turns back to you. "Although I have two requests."

"Yeah?"

"Firzt, you die here and now before we leave. Zzecond, all of the demon'z anger at Crowley for killing Hazztur and Ligur will be zet on you."

"That's fine. I was the one who killed them anyway, Crowley just gave me the holy water to do it."

Beelzebub grimaces at you and you turn around, walking back to Aziraphale and Crowley. You don't feel like getting yelled at by a Lord of Hell for killing two of their demons.

But you don't know how they'll react-- Crowley, in particular-- so you can't help but feel a pit rise in your stomach as you walk up to the pair.

~Crowley's POV~

Beelzebub glares at Y/N, to which Y/N runs back to me, standing only a foot away.

"Y/N," I begin, "What did you do?"

She looks down, her eyes wide and her breath shaking.

"Y/N, what did you say? You know we can take care of ourselves."

She finally responds with a whisper. "No."

"Excuse me?"

She raises her voice to a normal volume. "You can't keep running from them. They're going to find and destroy you eventually. To them, two demons are dead and Armageddon is canceled because of you and Aziraphale. They're going to make it a priority to make you suffer."

"And?" My stomach twists as she looks up into my eyes.

"And... remember how I told you that some things are worth fighting for? Some things are worth sacrificing everything that matters to you? And that there are things bigger and better than yourself that you need to protect. With your life, with every ounce of energy and soul you have."

"Y-yes."

She looks away again. "And... remember the prophecy?" She pulls her notebook out of her pocket and hands it to me. I flip to the page where the prophecy is written.

And it makes sense. The prophecy isn't about me, nor is it about Aziraphale. It's about her. And now...

An ultimate sacrifice shall beest madeth and affection shalt beest forgotten.

The prophecy is coming true. I give the notebook back and look into her eyes, which are wide with fear. She has no idea what she's signing up for.

"What did you tell them?" My voice comes out like a hiss, and she cowers. I have a feeling that she knew I'd react this way.

"I-I... said that I'll trade my soul for both of yours. I don't know the details... But I'm dying here and going to Hell. And Beelzebub also made it a point that any anger the demons feel at the cancellation of Armageddon or Hastur and Ligur's deaths are going to be set on me."

I feel like I'm going to throw up.

"Why?" This time, it's a whisper. I can't... understand what would be going through her head to sacrifice herself and her life. For us.

"Because, as I said, there are things-- and people-- worth sacrificing everything you have for. And I'm tired of everyone I love dying. My parents, now you and Aziraphale... How long would I even survive in the world with luck like that?"

I feel a pang of guilt and gratitude.

Y/N smiles weakly. "Besides, who better to keep a watchful eye over the world than you and Aziraphale?"

In a flash, I pull her close. She's done so much for me, and I've... done nothing for her.

"I'm so sorry."

"For what?"

"For not being able to protect you. For getting you into this mess. For... everything."

"Don't be. I'm glad I was able to be a part of this." She pulls away and smiles. This time, I can see that she's struggling to hold back tears. She blinks, and tears fall down her cheeks.

I can feel my heart fall to see her upset. I brush them away and hug her again.

"I swear that you'll survive," I whisper in her ear. "You're strong. I know you are. You can make it out of there and I swear that I'll spend every moment I can finding a way to get you out. I promise. Okay?"

Her voice comes out as a weak, croaky murmur. "Okay. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too." I pull away. "You should tell Aziraphale, too..."

"I was standing right here," Aziraphale says.

"Right."

"But, Y/N... I don't want you to sacrifice yourself..."

"I don't think anyone does except for Gabriel and Beelzebub," she responds. "But unfortunately, they're the ones who decide my destiny."

"Well, I'm sure it's part of Her plan. It'll be okay."

"Her?"

"God's."

"Oh..."

Gabriel walks over and interrupts. "This is heartwarming and all, but it's time for Y/N to go. Come on, hurry up."

I glare at him, but Y/N's the one to respond. "I will." Her eyes suddenly light up. "I'll be right back, I need to talk to Adam." She walks towards the boy, kneels, and whispers something in his ear.

After a moment, he nods and smiles. She stands again and walks over to me. She writes something on the prophecy page, rips it out, and hands it to me.

I look at it, and below the prophecy, there's a note.

"Here," she says. "Keep it in your pocket for now. Okay?" I nod and tuck it into my pocket. I can read it later.

She then writes something onto another piece of paper and hands it to Anathema.

"I'm sorry our meeting was so short-lived... Keep this safe. It's meant for you."

Anathema smiles. "I can do that. Thank you, Y/N."

"You're welcome. And thank you, too."

Anathema nods and Y/N moves to the center of the clearing. She looks at her shaking hands.

She pulls out the pistol I gave her what feels like an eternity ago. She methodically fiddles with the trigger and takes a deep breath, the last one she'll ever get to take. She nervously raises the gun to her head.

I shut my eyes and turn my head away. I don't want to see this.

And then there's a bang, and she's gone.

~Y/N's POV~

After the bang, you still don't feel anything. You hesitantly open your eyes and look around. Crowley's still looking away, shaking. Aziraphale's looking down, and there's guilt in his eyes.

Pepper, Wensleydale, and Brian are looking at Adam, appalled, and he's just looking at your feet with regret and understanding.

Gabriel and Beelzebub also stare at your feet, but their facial expressions are a frightening neutral.

You look down, and you see yourself.

Well, not yourself. Your broken shell, to be exact. You look back up and squeeze your eyes shut. You've never done well with blood and gore, so... This is not the sort of thing you'd ever want to see.

After you collect yourself, you walk towards Aziraphale and Crowley and wonder idly whether they can feel your presence.

After a moment of silence, Aziraphale raises his arm. You turn around, towards your shell, and it's now in the air.

You see it turn to ash, flowing with the wind, almost like wisps of smoke. The blood is gone.

Crowley mutters a quiet "thank you" and turns to go. Aziraphale follows.

Gabriel and Beelzebub go back to their respective domains, their missions accomplished.

Adam looks to his friends and snaps his fingers. Aziraphale and Crowley are no longer walking, and you know that they're back home. The ruins of the Bentley is gone as well.

The eyes of Pepper, Brian, and Wensleydale brighten in warming forgetfulness and you smile. Good, Adam understood.

You turn and see Death. They hadn't left after all.

And the world goes dark.

"But doth not fret, all shalt blow with the wind in time."