Life wasn't easy for us ever. How could be the life of a Auto driver's family? It was average, sometimes below average and sometimes poor, but we were happy. Our house wasn't a palace, of course, but it was full of happiness. Every Sunday we used to celebrate... Celebrated what? We don't know, maybe just our togetherness... but the sunday night routine was fixed for us, Having dinner while watching any movie broadcasting on TV followed by an ice cream and that's it...

We were happy because our parents taught us a great lesson. Happiness is associated with satisfaction not with money. One with a positive attitude can buy happiness in just ten rupees note in the form of an icecream and others with an ungrateful attitude and a treasure full of gold can cry for more.

I trusted my parents teaching wholeheartedly because parents are first teachers but not the last...  Life, Time, Circumstances etc also teach us many lessons.

Till the age of 14 I also trusted that one cannot buy happiness with money but then I realised... One can buy medicines and treatment with money.

It was a horrible night when we waited for papa till midnight but we got a phone call telling us about his accident. He was severely injured with many fractures and wounds. After a few days long treatment he was out of danger and we already ran out of money.

For the next six months it was almost impossible for us to arrange bread and butter to survive as the only source of income was bedridden. We failed to pay bills as well as school fees. Medical treatment charges were so high that a poor man would prefer to die instead of getting treated.

Time passed slowly, Papa was back to his work however nothing was as good as before. We weren't happy anymore, moreover we didn't even have money to but happiness, all we had was trauma, a great amount of debt but a hope.

Hope of a good future.

We believe everything will be fine, just like people say 'Don't worry, everything will be fine.' but no one whispers at the end 'They are just hollow words,'

When we started trusting that everything could be fine just then we got to know about Mom's disease. Brain tumor. Another heartbreaking phase of life began. We were again failed to buy happiness with a note of ten rupees.

She was fine till the day she was diagnosed with tumor but from the very next day she became silent and soon she was on the bed. I guess, not her disease but her hopelessness was the meain reason behind her death. She accepted death before death could accept her.
After the suffering of three years she left us under the burden of emotional pain and a great amount of debt.

At the age of 17 when girls think about handsome boys, celebrity crushes and fantasies, I was seeing the cruelty of life. After mom's demise papa was depressed, we three were trying to get back to life and supporting each other but soon the debt started eating us. We didn't know how to pay off the debt, the source of income was tiny in front of the payable amount. Moneylenders and pawnbrokers were knocking our door every day. Then life gave another lesson.

Surviving without money is easier than surviving with no self-respect.

It became difficult for papa to meet eyes with those people so he decided to shut his eyes permanently. He chose to leave his 18 year old daughter and 25 year old son alone in the whirlpool of the cruel world.

After Papa's death I was silent, suddenly life started looking like a burden, I also wanted to shrug off this burden as soon as possible but there was someone who tried his best to pull me out from this sorrow. No one else but my Bhai. My beloved Yasir Bhai.

He gave me the amount of love like a father. At the time of Papa's death he was preparing for UPSC, He wanted to become Civil Servant, despite of the circumference he was determined to do something big and support papa to pay off all the debt but when I became his responsibility he settled down with the very next job he got. A journalist in National Newspaper. I know he could get a better pay if instead of me he thought about himself but he gave priority to his sister.

He was the one who motivated me one more time to come out of the trauma of our parents' death, he was the one who told me that life doesn't stop, it goes on and on with or without someone... Better are those who walk with time leaving past behind and chasing the future with open eyes. He was the one who took loans and sold off our house to pay off the debt of our father, he was the one who took me to our current rental house so that I could get out of those depressing thoughts and focus on studies. He was the one who reminded me that once I was the topper of my class not a below average student. But even after everything I was unable to score good in intermediate exam. I scored just 60%, it could be another depressing phase of life but this time all thanks to Amaan and his mother who motivated me. There was no college in Delhi in which I could get admission on such low percentage but they both asked me to join an open learning platform however I decided to go away from Delhi. Away from the pollution of horrifying memories. Away from the thousands of past. After searching online for many days, indeed with the help of Amaan, I selected a few colleges of Dehradun. And when I put my wish in front of Bhai he accepted my demand without any delay. He happily sent me to Dehradun for higher studies, he has put trust in me, he had put his money for me.

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Life in the hostel was challenging for first few months. New people, new place, new rules and regulations weren't welcoming at all however I knew nothing would come to us easily, hardwork is required.

I was working hard, giving my best to survive in the hostel, my roommate was a weird creature, I hated her in the beginning but then I understood she had nothing to do with me, we didn't share any kind of bond other than sharing notes and notebooks.

But one day everything was changed when a stranger intruded my room and left me restless.

His arrival was like a gust of wind in the hot day of summer.

Till a day before I never thought of a boy but suddenly this stranger started coming to my senses. This was the first time when someone's voice was echoing in my ears. His lips smiled in my thoughts anytime without a prior notice. Even after trying a thousand times I was unable to forget him. Everytime his thoughts came with a increase in heartbeat followed by nervousness and restlessness. I wanted to know who was he? What was his name and everything about him. How how? I never knew.

For many days I looked at every boy on the road to find out that Ajnabi (stranger), many nights I waited for him to come again from the window however he didn't. I was asking random girls of the hostel if they know something about the boys visited our hostel the other nighf. But there was no information.

"What's wrong with you? I'm noticing your changed behaviour from the time I'm back from home." Tevy, my roommate asked after witnessing me occasionally smiling like a fool or getting mad without any reason like a freak.

Well, I didn't know when these kind of changes started coming to my behaviour. As far as I know, I was the same Urooj with no different behaviour.

"Nothing... Mujhe kya hona hai? Exam aane wale hain na... Bas..." I decided to close the sentence in between and opened the book how Tevy's eyes yelled that she could sense something. But how?

(Nothing, what could be wrong with me? Exams are around the corner... So...)

"Oh really?" Tevy narrowed her already tiny eyes, an identification mark of being North-east Indian, and I nodded without paying attention to her, my eyes fixed on my book.

"Ahem..." Tevy dangled her leg out of the bed, a mischievous smile played on her lips. "And what about that boy?" The pencil present in my hand slipped away and I turned to see Tevy.

"How do you get to know?" I bet my face lost its color, my voice no more than a mumbled. I could hear my own heartbeat. This was my deepest secret. A secret I wanted to hide from myself too, how Tevy got to know about that boy?

"It means there is someone... Nice. Now tell me everything about him in detail."

"What?" I blinked blankly, I knew Tevy was clever but this much? In these four months of sharing the same room I couldn't measure her depth.

"Tell me, tell me..." Tevy dragged the chair and sat down just opposite to me, for a few moments I was unable to take my eyes off from the glow of Tevy's face. Most of the time I wondered how can a girl carry such flawless skin without much efforts.

"Where are you lost?" Tevy snapped her fingers and I looked at her before thinking about the other night. Will it be fine to share the story with Tevy? I didn't know. But I was unable to hold back and told Tevy everything.

"Awwww.... Why wasn't I here?" Tevy fake cried and I blinked blankly. The experience of having an intruder in the room was horrible for me, I wasn't happy or excited in the said situation but if it was Tevy then the situation must be different. She would be happy and excited. I think so. I further shared my intention to know about that stranger and to my surprise Tevy didn't take a single second to throw a suggestion towards me.

"We are living in 2015, not in the stone age... Nowadays we can find out people on facebook." Picking up her mobile from the pillow Tevy dug her eyes to the screen, I was only felling scared because using mobile phone in the hostel was prohibited but Tevy never followed these rules.

"What's your facebook id?" Asked Tevy while glancing at me and I slowly shook my head.

"I don't have an account on social media." I state in a whisper. Tevy was shocked. "Till the age of 19 you don't have a social media account... Are you an alien?" How could I even think about making facebook accounts when the circumferences of my life were pushing me to die out of stress. My teenage years were different from the others.

"Everyone's life is not similar. Everyone is not similar." I muttered.

"You're so..." Tevy tried to find out a good word to describe me and "Lallu (idiot)!" Crossing her leg she sat down in front of me explaining the process how he could find out a boy on facebook.

"Waste of time." I announced.

"No. Tevy doesn't waste time." She raised her imaginary collar and I only rolled my eyes.

"I wish you were a little innocent like me and the other girls." I smiled looking at her tactics and strategies but Tevy rolled her eyes.

"Oh girl, You're not innocent but a duffer, and no one is innocent in this world. We all can think, understand and conclude, we all have our share of sins, lies and mistakes... You and some other girls are also not innocent, you are just single. One more thing, all singles are not single because they want to save their body for their future spouse but because they do not find out someone suitable for this work." I understood nothing. Maybe Tevy was correct. I was just an idiot to think, understand and conclude... But I had a small share of sins, lies and mistakes too...

"Let me focus." Tevy started doing what she wanted to but I was unable to get my mind off from the books.

"Leave it, focus on books instead of facebook." Being a bookworm I suggested Tevy who just ignored.

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Bye bye...

I forgot what I was up to 😅😅