y/n pov

I wake up to see lapis face very close to mine.

y/n: ah!

lapis: ah!

she backed away and say.

lapis: s-sorry my diamond I didn't mean to-

y/n: wait a seconde, did you called me my diamond?

lapis: yes, is that a problem my diamond?

y/n: you know that you can call me y/n, right?

lapis: okay, my y/n.

y/n: *blushes* no, no, just y/n.

lapis: my just y/n.

y/n: *face plams* look just y/n, and not my just y/n, forget the my thing. 

lapis: but on homeworld each gem has to call a diamond, my diamond.

y/n: well we are on earth so just y/m.

lapis: okay, y/n.

y/n: that's way better.

timeksip 

I decided to show lapis around, beginning by the big donut. until Ronaldo pops up in our face's.

Ronaldo: stop!

I look to him to see he is wearing a military style outfit. what is he going to do know?

Ronaldo: This is a restricted zone! *shoos them* Only those with special clearance may enter!

y/n: ... May, we have special clearance?

Ronaldo: *observes them* Hmmmm, granted.

we hide behind the rock when lapis taps my shoulder.

lapis: *whispers* are all humans like this?

y/n: *whispers* no, they aren't.

Ronaldo: Now that you're properly suited, let's investigate! *gives y/n binoculars* See those holes? Their shape and pattern is repeated over and over. *takes picture with phone* Some might say it's a coincidence. I say there's something... more.

y/n: Like what? A double coincidence?

Ronaldo: You'd already be in the know if you followed my blog, "keep beach city weird"! (He shows y/n and lapis the website on his phone.) I document all the weird thing that happen in beach city! You can't always trust facts and books. I'm out here hunting the TRUTH!

peedee: Oh, there you are! *runs over* dad wants you back at the shop! You're missing out on valuable frying time!

Ronaldo: It's WEIRD time, Peedee! I'm doing big stuff! COVER for me!

peedee: Fine. But this is the last time, or I'm telling Dad. *walks away mumbling angrily* "Big stuff", I'll give you "big stuff".

Ronaldo: *turns to y/n* So. You wanna get your hands really dirty? (y/n takes the bags off her hands and shows them to him.) Then follow me.

y/n: sorry dude, gotta show lapis around beach city!

Ronaldo: very well then. (Ronaldo stands up and walk away)

y/n: well lapis let me show you around.

lapis: okay!

timeskip

I decided to bring lapis to the pizza restaurant.

y/n: welcome to fish pizza!

lapis: what is pizza?

y/n: trust me you are going to love it.

I walk in to see kiki.

y/n: *waves* hey kiki!

kiki: oh, hey y/n! who is that blue girl behind you?

I look behind me and see that lapis was hiding behind me.

y/n: oh! that's lapis! say hi lapis!

lapis: uhhhhhhhhhh........hi?

kiki: hello...?

y/n: she is not good with people.

kiki: that's okay. come sit down. (she point to the empty table)

me and lapis sit down.

kiki: so, what do you like to order?

y/n: I'll take the extra large fish pizza. for both of us.

kiki: okay, one extra large fish pizza comming up!

lapis: y/n.

y/n: yes lapis?

lapis: do all humans eat 'pizza'?

y/n: no, there is a lot of food in the world, so many peopke eat diffrent food.

lapis: what is 'food'?

y/n: well, it's what humans eat, without it we won't survive.

lapis: it's like a energie, right?

y/n: yes! but we also need water!

lapis: so, humans only have to eat pizza and drink water to survive?

y/n: no, only eating pizza will make you sick. luckily we have a lot of diffrent kind of food, so we don't die.

lapis: I see.

kiki comes out of the kitchen with a large pizza.

kiki: enjoy your meal.

y/n: thanks kiki!

kike left the room.

y/n: well bone-a-petit!

lapis: wha...?

y/n: hehe, I don't speak france! 

I take a huge slice and eat it up. lapis is staring at me with a confused face.

lapis: so (lapis picks up a slice of the fish pizza) I take this and put it in my mouth...?

y/n: yes! (y/n puts another slice in her mouth)

lapis: okay..(lapis take a bite of the pizza and her face lights up) this is not that bad.

y/n: see told you.

timeskip to y/n showing lapis around beach city and going to Ronaldo and peedee.

I'm walking to Ronaldo trying to see what he is doing. thats until a weird snake costume falls on me. I look behind me to see peedee peeling potatoes in the back of the shop when Ronaldo comes out to take out trash.

peedee: Yo, Ronaldo! (Ronaldo remains silent.) Ehhh, so... see anything weird lately?

Ronaldo: *unshaven and depressed* No, everything's... normal. 

he sound really sad, but then peedee turns around and scream.

peedee: Ahh!

Ronaldo turns around to see me in the snake costume. Ronaldo, if you really think that I'm a snake person, I'll will kill yo-

Ronaldo: *laughs hysterically and slowly approaches her* HYAH! *hits y/n over the head with a potato, knocking her out*

timeskip

I wake up to see Ronaldo staring at me while peedee is recording with a hand-held camcorder.

Ronaldo: Wakey wakey, Mrs. Snakey... *uses flash light to dilate pupils* Wave forms seem typical for a twelfth dimensional being of this size. *lifts the fake arm using his flashlight* Arms appear to be, vestigial.

peedee: *holding camcorder* U-uh, Ronaldo? Is that, uh, one of the monster people you've been hunting?

Ronaldo: No no, not "monster" Peedee, snerson. It's very scientific! But still, better safe than sorry. *offers him a potato*

peedee: What's this for?

Ronaldo: For me! In case the amphibanoids turn my body into a host vessel!

peedee: No! *drops potato and begins to tear up*

Ronaldo: Peedee, Peedee, Peedee. You gotta look at the big picture here! Something important is finally happening to me!

The wall suddenly breaks as lars, sadie and lapis reveal themselves fully armed.

lars: Ronaldo! stop with this stuff! ive y/n back!

sadie: yeah, Ronaldo this is silly.

lapis: we know you have my diamond (sadie hold her back)

Ronaldo: *gasps* You, snake people... Hiding like cowards in your false humanoid exteriors! y/n got nothing to do with this, it's me you want! *takes off shirt to reveal armor*

lars quickly kicks him to the ground, Ronaldo recovers and attempts to attack sadie with a punch but is very easily blocked, causing his hand to hurt. karma Ronaldo, karma.

Ronaldo: *holding his hand and runs to sadie to punch her* AAAAAH! Aah-Aah! YOU SNONSTER! (lapis breaks a barrel over him.) AAAAH!

lars, sadie and lapis continue to attack while I wriggles free from the chair and the top of my costume.

ps y/n is wearing a shirt.

peedee: y/n?! (y/n rushes over.)

Ronaldo: Okay, okay. You've forced me to use my ultimate weapon! Stand back! Psychic Ghost Powers, Activate! (He begins to chant gibberish, lars, sadie and lapis ready themselves but y/n steps in between them.)

y/n: Everybody stop! I'm okay! 

lars: what...

Ronaldo: y/n, your legs! When did they get to you?

y/n: *annoyed* Ronaldo! It's not real! *tosses down her mask* It was just me.

Ronaldo: That, makes no sense... *rummages through the costume while Peedee looks on, embarrassed*

y/n: Ronaldo, a snake costume fell on my head.

Ronaldo: No! It— It just isn't that simple! There's got to be more to it than just, you. 

the peedee made something up with something like 'snake people'. Ronaldo then went mad crazy and we decided to leave the lighthouse.

y/n: Are you sure he'll be better like that?

peedee: Yeah, he's happy, ya know?

y/n: yeah.

we leave as Ronaldo keep screaming shit about snakes. what kind of friends do I have?

the end.