A/N: Credit to Renowned-Wolf for helping with a few things.

Scene opens up to a sunlit exterior of Stolas' mansion. A sigh of contentment from Stolas  is heard. Blitzo is shown lighting a cigar on Stolas' bed and folds his arms behind his head.

Stolas: *arms tied up* I'm sorry for having to move our little rendezvous early. I have an engagement this month on the full moon.

Stolas is shown wearing a ball gag and harness, his hands tied to the headboard with rope.

Blitzo: When this happens, it's not really something I fuss about...

He uses the cigar to burn rope, freeing Stolas, who takes Blitzo's cigar from him and takes a long drag of it.

Blitzo: But, do you really need the book for this farm bullshit? I have, like, fifteen new clients waitin' for heads to roll.

Stolas: As shocking as it may seem, Blitzy, my grimoiiiiire is actually incredibly important. And it isn't supposed to be lent out to itty-bitty Imps like yourself.

Stolas puts out the cigarette in one of Blitzo's horns and pinches his cheek before Blitzo shoves him away.

Stolas: The Harvest Moon Festival is a very special occasion! It's been my annual duty to showcase it in the Ring of Wrath. It's celebrated by a very charming little festival with the locals.

Blitzo pulls a feather out of his mouth in disgust.

Blitzo: Wrath, huh? Some of my employees are from there. I've never really been. I hear it's full of inbred chucklefucks.

A/N: Except the time you stole Verosika's car and maxed her credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons.

Stolas: *sits up* Oh! Why don't you all join me at the festival? I can guarantee you all...

Stolas pulls the covers over his head and his head appears near Blitzo's crotch.

Stolas: ...special access~ *chuckles*

Blitzo: Look, I told you, we're not bodyguards. Okay? That was a one-time thing we did badly.

Stolas stands up with the covers on his head. He does a playful owl head tilt.

Stolas: Via and I thought Y/N did rather well. I'm simply offering a work-free day of fun! I feel quite safe at the Harvest Festival. It's the same every year.

Blitzo: Well if you promise this isn't some fuck fest invite, it does sound like it could be a blast and a half. Plus, it's not like we can do jack shit without your book anyway.

Stolas: (baby-talk voice) Aww, I'm sowwy your clients will have to wait...

Blitzo: *waves a dismissive hand* Oh, fuck my clients!

Moxxie and Millie's apartment is revealed under a Robo-Fizz sign. Moxxie and Millie are asleep in their bed. Moxxie's phone lights up and a Phantom of the Opera organ ringtone is heard. Moxxie taps the phone and rolls over. The phone rings again. In annoyance, Moxxie grabs the phone and sits up.

Moxxie: What do you want, sir?

Blitzo: Hey, hope I didn't wake ya, Mox! How would you and Mils like to visit the Wrath Ring for some harvest bullshit this year?

Millie sits up in excitement.

Millie: The Harvest Moon Festival?! Yee-fuckin'-haw!

Moxxie: *sighs* Well, Millie likes the idea. Wait... Where are you calling from?

Blitzo falls down onto the bed from the ceiling. His phone bonks him on the head. Moxxie narrows his eyes as Blitzo purrs happily. Moxxie looks annoyed while Millie seems amused.

Moxxie: Mm-hm... Of course.

Blitzo: Just need to tell two more people.

Cut to Loona's room. The two of you are shown sleeping in her bed with her spooning you and having her tail wrapped around you.

Blitzo creeps into the room, but before he can get a single syllable out, Loona senses an intruder's presence and clocks him out cold.

Y/N: (sleepily) What was that?

Loona: (sleepily) Forget it, just snuggle up with Mommy.

You immediately snuggle into Loona's sweater puppies and you embrace each other for a couple minutes.

Y/N: Want me to get started on breakfast?

Loona: In a few minutes.

She wraps her tail around you again and affectionately licks your face.

Blitzo: (groggy) By the way, we're heading to Wrath for some Harvest bullshit today...

You and Loona merely give him a blank look.

Transition to you making eggs, bacon, and country-fried steak for yourself and Loona. As you're plating them, Loona grabs a piece of bacon out of the pan and eats it.

Y/N: (teasing) Really, babe?

Loona: Not my fault you're a great cook. 

She pecks you on the lips before grabbing a plate, walking to the table with a sway in her hips.

Cut to the two of you dressing for the Wrath Ring.

Y/N:

Loona;

Y/N: (flustered) Sweet Lucifer, you look beautiful.

Loona: (drawl) You don't look half-bad yourself, Cowboy. (holds you close) Play your cards right and I just might tie you up with a lasso tonight.

You become even more flustered as Loona presses her snoot to your cheek before using your amulet to open a portal to the office and the two of you and a still groggy Blitzo walk through.

Millie: Oh, baby! You look so handsome!

She hugs you tightly around the waist and beams like a proud mother. You awkwardly reciprocate before IMP heads out to the van, passing by Verosika's studio, who are aroused by your Western get-up.

Tex: (tail-wagging) Just when I thought you couldn't get any cuter.

Roxy: (tail-wagging) I wanna ride that stallion.

Verosika: (fanning herself) Oof. Come to Mama.

The other succubi and incubi: (nosebleed) Tie me down, Daddy.

Your other girlfriends each give you a goodbye kiss.

Cut to the Rough n Tumbleweed Ranch. 

A/N: This is something I recently saw theorized. Does this mean that Millie's full name prior to marrying Moxxie was "Mildred Rough-Tumbleweed"?

The I.M.P van pulls up in front of Two Imps.

Millie: Mama! Daddy!

Millie gets out of the van and happily runs toward her parents. Her father hugs her and spins her around before placing her down.

Joe: Yeeeee-hawwww! How's my deadly little pumpkin spice doing?

Joe ruffles Millie's hair affectionately.

Millie: I'm good, Pa! Thanks for lettin' us stay here for the harvest jamboree.

Lin: It's no trouble. We know you aren't making as much anymore since y'all went "freelance".

Millie: Freelance pays fine, Ma! We're doin' fiiiiine! [serious] It's fine.

Millie walks over to Moxxie, who is struggling to carry luggage.

Millie: Anyway, y'all remember my husband Moxxie?

Millie shoves a nervous Moxxie in front of her parents. They stare at him in disapproval.

Joe: Hmph.

Moxxie: Greetings, Lin! Joe! How have you been, uh, with all the... flaming twisters and stuff around here? *nervously holds out his hand*

Joe: We lost our old farm hand to one of them terrors last week.

Moxxie: *laughs nervously* Oh, crumbs. My bad! I am so sorry. I- I didn't mean to open that wound... sir.

Blitzo: Hey, watch it! I'm the "sir" here, bucko!

Millie: Oh yeah! Y'all haven't met my boss Blitzo! And his hellhound!

Y/N: She has a name! Seriously, are she and Moxxie racist against Hellhounds or something?

Loona: I'm not just his hellhound.

Blitzo: Yeah, she's my daughter! (pulls Loona to his side)

Loona: Only on paper.

Loona: *pulls out smartphone and begins typing* Y'all don't deserve to know my name.

Millie: (holding you close) And this is Y/N. My-

Joe: Oh, so this is the human you told us about!

Y/N, Blitzo, and Loona: O_O.

Y/N: (nervously running your hand through your hair) You, uh- know I'm human?

Loona: You told them?!

Millie: Well, yeah. I'm not gonna keep secrets from family.

Joe and Lin both give you a firm handshake.

Lin: You have nothing to worry about, dear. We're not ones to go blabbing to entitled blue-blood royals about rules being broken.

Blitzo walks over to Millie's parents.

Blitzo: It's a pleasure to finally meet the sperm and egg factory *shoves Moxxie away* that popped out this little gem of an assassin. You two raised a *playfully elbows Millie* sturdy bitch!

Joe: *chuckles* That we did! So... Blitzo, is it? Heh heh. That's a fine name.

Blitzo and Joe shake hands.

Lin: It reminds me of war.

Joe: *sighs happily* Nothing like a little war to make a strong man! *flexes bicep*

Blitzo: I like you people.

Moxxie: Y'know... more battles were won by technological advances in warfare. I've researched the history of weaponry extensively, and it's inspiring how... for example, the progression of guns utilizing angelic technology has changed the landscape of Hell's combative...

Millie makes a "cut it out" motion with her hands.

Y/N: Dude. Read the room.

Moxxie: I mean... (deep, awkward voice) War fun!

Joe: Guns get the job done... but a man ain't nothin' if he can't tear the head off a hellish beast with only his bare... hands!

Blitzo: HAAAA! He's right, Moxxie! [speaks baby talk] You got cute wittle baby hands like your baby dick!

Blitzo grabs Moxxie's hand and reaches toward his crotch. Moxxie slaps his arm away.

Moxxie: Refrain... sir.

Joe: Speakin' of strong hands, y'all should meet our newest help. Hey! Strika! Scythe!

Strika rides her horse Bombproof up to your group while Scythe runs on all fours.

Strika: Well, howdy! Oh, lookie here! You must be the famous Mildred and her freelancin' friends.

Scythe: Oh shit, it's that cute fella I saw in Gluttony not long ago. Okay, play it cool.

She extends her paw a little too enthustically.

Scythe: Howdy! I'm Scythe.

Y/N: I'm Y/N.

You shake her paw and she avert her gaze slightly, trying to hide her blush. Loona gives her a warning glare.

Strika: What're y'all doin' so far away from Imp City? Heh. The free workin' finally slowin' down?

Y/N: Oh for Lucifer's sake; "free-lance" doesn't mean we work for free. It just means we have a bunch of different employers.

Strika fully looks at you for the first time and has a similar reaction to Scythe.

Strika: Woah Nelly! The boss didn't say he was hot!

She thinks back to a phone call she had with Stella the previous night after Joe, Lin, Scythe, and Millie's siblings had gone to bed.

Stella: (over the phone) Remember; you are to kill my cheating prick of a husband and steal an amulet off of a demon that will look like an Imp/Hellhound hybrid. (under her breathe) Ugh. Disgusting. (Regularly) He's really a human that got that look through some asinine ritual. Kill him as well if you have to.

Strika: Understood, Ma'am.

Back in the present.

Strika: No way I'm killing that Stallion unless it's absolutely necessary.

Millie: Anyway, we're just visitin' for the festival. The prince is our boss' [in a dramatic voice] boyyyyfrieeeend!

Blitzo: Millie, I am not above hitting a female in front of her daddy.

Strika: Boss, huh...? Ohhh, so YOU'RE the bold imp to start his own killing biz?

Blitzo: Yeah, well if you're good at somethin', you should probably capitalize.

Strika: Not many Imps start businesses on their own. That's pretty impressive, sir.

Blitzo: Oh...! Yeah? It is-- I- I- I guess- I guess it is, isn't it?

Strika: So you even conned that ditzy blueblood into gettin' you to the surface?

Strika and Blitzo shake hands.

Blitzo: Well, it's long and complicated, but the short answer is yes. But he's not like, you know-- W- We're y- We're not, like... We're not doing it... We w- What's betw- It's a transactional fucking, you see.

Blitzo makes a sexual motion with his hands.

Joe: (to you and Blitzo) Y'know... you boys  should enter the Pain Games!

Blitzo scuttles sideways over to Joe.

Blitzo: I heard games! What games? I'm in!

Y/N: What happens in these games?

Lin: Every harvest festival, there's a competition to be the roughest, toughest bastard in Wrath!

Millie crosses her arms and pouts.

Millie: Yeah! Wish I could play!

Lin: Millie, you know you get too carried away. The last competition ended in fifteen separate funerals. 

Millie: I'm aware, but I only caused nine of them! How come Sallie May still gets to compete?

Lin: Your sister doesn't have a neighborhood head count.

Millie: She so does!

Sallie May carries a sack and a small imp drags an Imp body in the background.

Sallie May: (sing-song voice) It doesn't count if they don't find the bodyyyyyy!

Millie seethes.

Sallie May notices you and gets the same look as Strika and Scythe.

Sallie May: (flirtatious) Hey, sugar.

Loona and Millie both glare at her.

Millie: Can you not? He's like a son to me!

Sallie May: Give me some time, and he could be a brother in-law to you.

Millie growls like an angry tiger and Loona holds you protectively.

Lin: Still, you get to root for her and your brothers, and now you can cheer on your boss and co-worker!

Moxxie puts a hand on Lin's shoulder.

Moxxie: Y'know, she can also cheer for me.

Joe: *wheeze-laughs and slaps his leg* ...Wait, you?

Moxxie: Yeah! I can compete, can't I?

Lin elbows him hard in the side. Moxxie tears up in pain.

Joe: Sorry, boy. But, I don't think sensitive, thespian types would last very long in the games.

Moxxie: I was born here, too! *drawls* I have some fight in me!

Strika puts a hand on Moxxie's shoulder.

Strika: Huh. Well then, little fella... Why don'tcha help me wrangle one o' them hogs for dinner?

Strika mentions to a large sleeping hell hog in a pigpen.

Moxxie: Simple. Watch me!

Strika grins and hands Moxxie a dagger and rope.

Strika: Nah... with these. Bullets can't pierce the shell. You gotta get the knife underneath and pry yourself an openin'.

Moxxie gulps.

Moxxie: Oh! Right, right. I knew that.

Blitzo leans in toward Moxxie and grabs his shoulders. Moxxie's eyes twitch.

Blitzo: Now, just remember, your rep with the in-laws is on the line here! So, no pressure at all, you totally will not make an ass of yourself in front of everyone important in your life. 

Y/N: (annoyed) You're not helping, Blitzo.

Blitzo: (ignoring you) Go get 'em, tiger.

Blitzo shoves Moxxie forward.

Moxxie: Ohhh.

Millie: Mox, you don't need to do this!

Blitzo: Oh, he totally does. KICK ITS ASS, MOXXIE! YEAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Blitzo cheers as Moxxie enters the pen. He nervously walks forward, knife in hand. Moxxie leaps forward and wraps the rope around the hog's neck. He moves the knife down and it strikes harmlessly against the hog's hide. The hog roars and runs around, trying to buck Moxxie off.

Blitzo: FUCK yeah, Moxxie! Ride it, Moxxie! Make it that bitch you won't call back in the morning!

Loona grins and records a video on her phone.

Loona: This is fucking beautiful.

She notices your side-eye.

Loona: I mean- "Yeah! Rangle it, Moxxie!"

Blitzo: Doin' great, Moxxie! *whispers to Loona* Send me that video later.

Millie watches in concern as Moxxie yelps and looks up to see the hog buck Moxxie into the mud.

Moxxie: My clavicle...

A/N: Don't say funny sounding body parts if you want sympathy.

Y/N: I'll handle this.

You jump into the pen and use your amulet to conjure a lasso and a two blades.

Loona: (filming) You got this, babe! 

The hog charges at you. You dive out of the way and fling one of the blades, hitting it square in one of its' eyes

As the Hog bucks in agony you lasso it's legs and leap up to pry underneath it's shell with your other blade and drive it into the Hog's flesh up to the hilt. It grunts before it slowly collapses in the mud.

Loona, Scythe, Sallie May, and Strika are shown all having hearts in their eyes.

Loona: That was awesome, babe! (howls)

Strika: (aroused) Well, that was mighty impressive.

Scythe: (aroused) If you want, we could help you skin it for-

Strika: (waving her off) Yeah, yeah, yeah. No one was talking to you, mutt.

Scythe growls at her.

Strika: (picking up the hog) Let's go, handsome.

Loona follows after, having her arm and tail wrapped around you possessively. 

Blitzo: (following after) Oh, I am always down to skin the manly meat.

Y/N and Loona: That's what she said.

Blitzo: What "who said"? Wait, what bitch is talking shit about me?!

Everyone but Millie and Moxxie leave for the house with the demon hog. Moxxie sighs sadly with his arm in a cast. Millie comforts him.

Millie: Don't let 'em get to you. And hey, you don't need my parents to respect you. They will eventually.

Sallie May: No, they won't.

Millie glares at her.

Sallie May: What? I'm right, ain't I?

Moxxie: *drawl* Oh, I'mma enter in those games.

Millie sighs sadly.

Sallie May: *appears out of nowhere* Hmm, how pissed would you be if I bet on him dyin'?

Millie glares at her again.

Scene cuts to the Harvest Festival. Wally Wackford stands on stage with a microphone and speaks dramatically.

Wally Wackford: Welcome, I say-a, welcome-a... all to Wrath-a Ring's-a annual-a Harvest-a Moon-a... a-Festival! To kick things up, we have the great prince Stolas-a, here to usher in this here Pain Games!

Stolas takes the microphone from Wally Wackford.

Stolas: *chuckles* How kind, Wackford. Greetings, tiny... Wrath Ring Imps! I hereby welcome you all to another year of celebrating the spoils of your labor that continue to feed the citizens of Hell!

A crowd of Imps glare at him and boos are heard.

Stolas: I'm happy to kick off the start of these games that will challenge the toughest Imps to show their skill in dominance. Good luck to you all! Especially that sexy little one there... Yoo-hoo! Blitzy!

Stolas waves at him while Blitzo glares.

Blitzo: Ugh. Fuck me.

Camera pans to show you standing next to him without your amulet, having asked Loona to hold it for you.

Y/N: (teasing) He just might, you just have to go up there and ask.

Strika, Sallie May, and Scythe all laugh.

Blitzo: (salty) You're lucky Loonie likes you.

A gun goes off and the games begin. Moxxie gets trampled with a yelp as the other imps race down the trail. Strika climbs up a wooden ramp structure while Blitzo leaps down ahead of him. Moxxie tries to catch up. He claws at the structure and falls into a small puddle. He gets chewed up and thrashed by a monstrous black and white shark.

 In the next shot, Strika is shown having you tied up and gives you bedroom eyes while you are shown blushing profusely. Loona grips the fence so hard that the wood cracks. 

A muscular Imp holds a rope and grins at a scared Moxxie. Strika, Blitzo and Moxxie team up in a tug of war match with you, Scythe, and Sallie May on the other. Moxxie falls into the water and the shark attacks him again. 

Y/N and Blitzo: O_o

The scene cuts to a wrestling match/brawl in the mud. A trio of Imps charge at you. You dodge and trip the first once, causing to land face first in the mud. The second Imp throws a punch before you catch her first and judo throw her, tossing her against the fence. The third Imp grabs you from behind.

Imp: Come on! Hit him! 

The other Imps rush forward before you lash with both feet, kicking both opponents in the chest and knocking them back into the mud.

You then stomp on the foot of the Imp holding you before elbowing him the side. He yells in pain and releases his grip. You punch him in the face once before bringing him to the ground and continue punching him until he spits out a tooth. 

Loona: (cheering) Come on, Y/N! Kick their asses! You can do it!

You look over to her and wink as the other two Imps circle around you before you look back and notice you're standing close to the shark pool. 

The male Imp tries to kick you before you grab his foot, kick him in the balls and toss him into the pool. You then duck under a punch from the female Imp before punching her in the gut, walking behind her, and casually push her in the pool.

Seconds later a shark pops up, mauling both of them.

You look to see Scythe facing off with very muscular Imp and throughly kicking his ass and Sallie May holding a lasso with a seductive look.

Sallie May: Well, well. I was hoping to get some alone time with you.

She wraps her lasso around you and pulls you close.

Y/N: (flustered) L-Look, I'm flattered that you're interested, but-

You dart your eyes over to Loona.

Y/N: (lowering your voice) I'm dating Loona along with a couple other Hellhounds and a group of Succubi. It was already a little hard on Loona agreeing to share me with others. 

Sallie May: I can't say I'm not disappointed, but not wanting to hurt your girlfriend's feelings is commendable. Doesn't mean I still can't tease you a little.

She knocks you to the ground and straddles you while giving you a seductive smirk before Strika yanks her off and knocks her out with a sucker punch.

Strika: That stallion is mine to ride, ya hear?!

Y/N: O_O

A group of imps do a football huddle on top of Moxxie. The shark leaps over the fence and begins to elbow drop Moxxie.

Moxxie: MOTHERFUC--!!

Y/N: Ok, what is up with that?! Did Moxxie date a shark when he was younger and the relationship ended badly?

Cuts back to stage.

Wally Wackford: I say, I say, for the first year ever, we have a three-way tie for winner of the Harvest Moon Pain Games!

Stolas takes the microphone from Wally Wackford.

Stolas: The winners are... Strika, Y/N, aaaaand my darling Blitzy!

Stolas walks onto the stage and does a pose as the crowd cheers.

Y/N and Blitzo: Just say his/my name RIGHT! 

Blitzo: Fuckin' dick!

Blitzo walks onto the stage in frustration. Moxxie and Millie watch from the wooden bleachers.

Moxxie: (referring to Strika) Alright. So, she has the "physical advantage." I'm better at other things, like singing!

Strika: *pulls out a guitar* I'd like to take this opportunity to sing a quick song I wrote just now, about me winnin'.

Strika strums the guitar she pulled out.

Moxxie: Oh, WHAT THE FUCK?!

https://youtu.be/NsLbgqkX5yI

A/N: Couldn't find a good female cover.

Cut to later. Moxxie glumly walks up some stairs. He notices light shining through the bottom of a door.

Moxxie: Well, that's troubling.

Moxxie opens the door and peers around. He notices the light coming from a box. He walks over and sees a rifle with glowing designs in an open gun case.

Moxxie: Oh, my crumbs

He runs his hand along the side of the rifle.

Moxxie: A genuine carmine crafted blessing-tipped rifle! How... How in the fuck did she get one o' these?!

Strika leans against the door frame behind him.

Strika: Why don't you ask me, little dude?

Moxxie: Shit! W- Why do you have this... missy?! You are aware this kind of weapon can kill--

Strika: ...demon royalty?

Moxxie: Yes. That.

Strika: No shit. *flicks his wheat stalk away* That's kinda the point.

Strika runs her claws along the door. She closes the door and advances menacingly toward Moxxie with a grin.

Moxxie: Okay. Well I'm- I'm relatively concerned by your possession of this... I'm also glad my instant dislike of you has been vali-

[Strika grabs Moxxie by the throat.]

Moxxie: -DATED!

Strika wraps her tail around Moxxie's neck. She tosses Moxxie hard against the wall. Se chokes Moxxie on the floor as Moxxie hisses and tries to claw at her. Strika holds him down with her body weight. Moxxie glances over to see a lamp on a table. He kicks the table and the lamp crashes into Strika. Millie hears the crash from outside. 

Moxxie stands up and races toward the door. He pulls the door open but Strika roughly pulls him back by his tail. Strika covers Moxxie's mouth and begins to strangle him. She chuckles evilly as Moxxie begins to lose consciousness.

Striker: *smirks* Pathetic.

Millie appears behind Strika and stabs her in the back with a knife. Moxxie collapses to the floor. A feral, enraged Millie stabs Striker repeatedly in the back. She leaps onto her back and holds the knife at her neck, but she breaks from her hold and stops her at the last moment. Strika then slams Millie off against the wall, breaking her arm. A now-bleeding Millie collapses next to Moxxie, clutching her broken arm. Moxxie reaches his hand towards Millie.

Moxxie: *weakly* Millie...

Strika grabs both of them by their hair and tosses them into a cellar. Millie cries out as her foot gets caught in a bear trap.

Strika: I'd kill y'all, but I feel like there's more leverage with your rodeo clown of a boss and your sexy dork co-worker if I don't! Plus, you little things ain't worth the cleanup.

Moxxie runs up the stairs, but Striker closes the cellar doors. Moxxie tries to push the doors, but they won't budge.

Cut to you talking with Loona and Scythe when you notice something.

Y/N: Hey babe? Have you seen Moxxie or Millie lately?

Loona: No. Why?

Y/N: I haven't seen them since the Games and I'm starting to get a little worried. Especially with how Moxxie was taking things with Strika.

Scythe: They might be back at the house. Lin and Joe have a ton of guests rooms. 

Y/N: I'll check it out.

Loona: (handing your amulet back) Fine. Just...be careful.

Y/N: I promise. 

The two of you share a brief kiss before you head off.

Scythe: He's really somethin'.

Loona: (tail-wagging) Yeah. He really is.

Cut to Stolas giving a speech.

Scene cuts to Stolas on stage. Stolas magically flips through the grimoire.

Stolas: My dear commoners of the Ring of Wrath! I, Stolas of the Ars Goetia, hereby curse this year's harvest with the glow of the true Harvest Moon!

The clouds swirl as Stolas creates a portal. The portal reveals a glowing orange full moon in the sky. The crowd oohs in wonder. Strika chuckles darkly as she aims the rifle at Stolas' forehead. A click is heard behind her.

Y/N: (holding a gun) Um, excuse me. The FUCK?!

Strika: (undoing a button on her shirt) Hey, Stallion. Thought you were at the festival.

Y/N: I was, until I realized I haven't seen Moxxie or Millie for a while. Then I come here and find you pointing a gun at Stolas.

Strika: Y/N, c'mon. I know being a human and all, you don't know much about how Hell works. You can be doing so much more than working for bitter sinners, especially with that fancy amulet of yours. The people of Hell don't respect you. Not Hellborn, not Sinners, and definitely not royalty. Things would be 10 times worse for you if they knew the truth. Your amulet combined with my angelic weapons...we could be the most powerful couple in Hell. And...

She approaches presses her chest against you

Strika: You deserve a woman who can you take care of a man. Not some Mutt.

Y/N: You bring up some good points...

Strika: Been workshoppin' it all day.

Y/N: Ya know what?...Fuck it. I'm *in*.

Strika leans in and kisses you passionately, running her hand up your chest...before you catch her wrist in a vice grip inches away from your amulet.

Strika: Quite a grip you get there. (beat) Ok, that's actually starting to hurt a little...

Y/N: You really thought I would fall for that? You're either incredibly bold or incredibly stupid. Maybe a lot of Demons don't respect me. Maybe I'm fucked if the higher-ups found out there was a human down here. But if you think I'd ever betray my friends or loved ones...you've got another thing coming.

Strika: It's a shame...I really thought you were cute.

She kicks you in the chest, knocking you against the wall, before she grabs for your amulet.

You knock her hand aside before you headbutt her, followed by you tackling her. You pin her down and punch her in the face before she bites down on your hand, followed by kneeing you in the crotch.

You fall onto your back before Strika begins strangling with one hand while reaching for your amulet with the other. Before she can reach it, you use it to extend your canines and claws, and slash her hands. 

She jerks away, and before she can recover, you tackle her out the window.

Cut to outside the house, where Loona and Scythe have just arrived, when the two of you crash to the ground behind them.

Loona: Y/N?!

Y/N: Get Strika! She's-

Strika rips the amulet off your neck and punches you before laughs triumphantly while Loona rushes to your side.

Strika: (reaching for her gun) It's really a darn shame, Y/N. You don't know what you're missing out on. (aims gun at your chest) Oh, well.

Scythe: No!

She bodyslams Strika, causing the shot to go wide, and graze the side of your head instead. 

Loona: Y/N!

She shields you with her body as Scythe continues pummeling Strika.

Scythe: You have no idea how long I've waited to do this!

She digs her claws into Strika's chest before she snatches the amulet away from her.

Strika cries out in agony before she whistles for bombproof, who bucks Scythe away before Strika climbs on and rides off.

Loona: Y/N?! Y/N! Come on, please be ok!

Loona's panicked voice brings Blitzo, M&M, who had finally managed to escape the Cellar, Millie's family, and Stolas over. You are shown unconscious from the blood loss.

Stolas: What happened?!

Scythe: Strika ended up being some psycho bitch who shot Y/N!

Millie: (near panicking) Someone hurt mah baby?! 

Stolas: Everyone stand back.

He whispers to himself before holding a hand outwards you, healing your wound. 

Stolas: He'll be fine, I promise.. He just needs to sleep it off.

He levitates you off the crowd and walks into the house before placing you on a bed.

Loona approaches Scythe.

Loona: Hey, uh- thanks for what you did back there. I mean, if you hadn't attacked Strika when you did, Y/N might be-

Scythe: You're welcome. 

Cut to Strika talking on the phone with Stella at the "Hideaway Motel; the woman who tried to kill you definitely isn't here".

Strika: I failed to kill the target at the festival and to retrieve the cargo. But don't worry, ma'am. It won't happen again.

Stella: It better not! I want this cheating prick dead and that meddlesome human's amulet! I don't care who you have to go through, MAKE IT HAPPEN!

Camera pans out to show Stella is stupid enough to be shouting her evil plans at the dinner table with Stolas and Octavia present, though the latter can't hear her due to having headphones in.

Strika: (over the phone) Understood.

Cut back to her in her hotel room.

Strika: I'll get 'em next time. (evil chuckle)

Cut to Rough n Tumbleweed ranch. You are shown still passed out in your room with Loona lying on top of the covers with a worried expression while holding your amulet.

Y/N: (suddenly bolting awake) Where's Strika?! Is everyone-

You're cut off as Loona pounces on you and smothers you with kisses and licks. 

Loona: Never scare me like that again!

Y/N: (flustered; sporting several lipstick marks) Yes, Loonie.

Loona: Good boy.

She gives you a loving kiss on the forehead while placing your amulet back over your neck. You get even more flustered as she gives you bedroom eyes before pulling your pants down and spitting in her paw.

Y/N: (flustered) Loonie-

Loona: (covering your mouth with her other paw) Sshh. You've been through so much today, Puppy. Just relax and let Mommy take care of you.

She slowly starts stroking you and you moan into her paw.

Loona: You love mommy's soft paws and pads, don't you, Puppy?

Y/N: (muffled) Yes, Mommy.

Loona removes her paw and kisses you roughly as she picks up the pace.

After a couple minutes.

Loona: You close?

You nod.

Loona: Good. Now let it all out for me. 

You do so and Loona kisses you again to silence your moans.

Loona: (dreamily) You always make such a mess.

She licks her paw clean before she spoons you and gives affectionate licks until you fall asleep.

Cut to the next morning, where all of you are packing and Joe and Lin are chastising Millie.

Lin: I can't believe you let her trap you, Millie! Haven't we taught you better?

Millie: I was seein' red, Ma! And she was slippery!

Lin: Excuses! You're better than that, Mildred!

You and Moxxie share a look before marching over to Millie's parents.

Moxxie: Y'know, she protected me. [drawl] And maybe I'm not a strong beefy dickhead, [normal voice] but Millie has the strength enough for both of us! 

Y/N: You two are getting on her case about being hurt by an obvious hit woman that *you* hired?!

Moxxie and Y/N: [drawl]Shaaaaame on you!

Blitzo: Aw, Moxxie, look at you! Speechin' like a big boy with his big paaaants!

Joe glares at you and Moxxie, curtly nods and leaves.

Millie: Wooow! He nodded! (to Moxxie) He's never acknowledged your input before!

Millie stands up on crutches and walks away.

Moxxie: Soooo, is that progress?

Y/N: Better than nothing. 

On the ride back to IMP's office, you are shown deep in-thought.

Moxxie: Everything alright, Y/N?

Y/N: I was just thinking; whoever hired Strika to kill Stolas also seemed to want my amulet. That explains why she was extra grabby with it. We should be really careful going forward, I think we could have someone really powerful working against us...

Cut to Stella by herself. She casts a spell to set a picture of Stolas aflame before looking at a picture of your amulet. 

She lets out an evil laugh before...choking on her own saliva and her laughter turns into choked, desperate squawking.

End of chapter. Next; meeting the Hazbin cast.