The sky grew dark when I finally arrived at Chuchpoint. The town resembled a village from a fairy-tale land, all the cottages small with hay roofs and flowers at the windows.

I entered the inn, the biggest house there, with two stories, but only half the size of the Beardsley manor. I opened the door and the innkeeper took one glance at me and understood.

"You must be the girl Mister Silas Beardsley mentioned," he said.

"Yes, I am," I said. Then I remembered the letter and pulled it out from the pocket in my coat and handed it to him. He opened it, scanned it carefully, then looked back at me.

"He's paid for your room and services. Would you like to go to your room first or have some supper?"

"I don't need supper tonight," I said. He frowned.

"You can also have supper in your room." I shook my head.

"No, there won't be any need."

He gave a brisk nod before walking up the stairs. I followed. The staircase was narrow and creaked as we ascended. Then we went down the hallway and stopped before the third door, which he unlocked with a key and then opened for me.

"This will be your room," he said. "Would you like to be called for breakfast tomorrow?" I shook my head again.

"No, thank you."

"Very well. What is your name?"

"Shuyan."

"Su—excuse me?" The confusion evident on his face made me stop. I had forgotten I was no longer in the House of Beardsley. I was in the outside world, the world where people didn't care for how my name was pronounced. The cruel and uncaring outside world. I shook my head.

"No, I meant Susanne. Yes, Susanne Clock."

"Very well," he said again. "I wish you a good night, Miss Susanne Clock." He handed me the key to my room and then turned and left, and I entered my room.

The long day was finally over.

This was it.

This was the end of my everything.

I took off my coat and unbuttoned my dress before quickly getting into bed, but despite how tired I was, I couldn't sleep at all.

The image of Eugene's face kept returning. I knew, then, that no matter how long I lived, the image would forever be etched in my eyelids. This, I thought, must be how Tobias felt when Eugene broke his legs.

How alike we were—causing grief for the same person, the person we both loved the most.

The next few days I grew used to life at the inn. There were only two other guests besides me, and they didn't pay me any attention. The innkeeper also had a wife who prepared the food, which was good. In the day time I would even walk about Churchpoint, visiting stores or taking strolls, making people stare at me.

I felt out of place, as always, but a part of me had grown used to it. There would probably never be another place where I could feel like home again. Because there would never be another place with Clo, Rhiannon, and Beth, my precious friends.

One day I woke up in morning to soft rapping on my door.

"Yes," I said, sitting up in bed. Had they forgotten I didn't want breakfast? "Is something the matter?"

"Miss Susanne," said the innkeeper, "There's a man here by the name of Tobias Beardsley looking for you."

Tobias?

Why was he here?

"Is—is he here with anyone else?" I asked.

"No, he's alone."

"Where is he?"

"Waiting at the parlor room downstairs."

"I'll be there as soon as I finish getting ready," I said.

"Very well, I'll tell him to wait for you."

I heard the innkeeper's footsteps fade, then scrambled out of bed.

How had Tobias found out where I was? Then I remembered—that day he overheard Silas and my conversation. But why did he come? He knew my choice. He couldn't possibly still be thinking of bringing me back.

After I pulled my hair back and got dressed, I went downstairs to the parlor room. It was a small and cozy room, a big contrast to the more glamorous and intimidating Beardsley parlor room, and there, on a worn out grey divan, sat a familiar figure.

"Master Tobias."

He stood up slowly, decked out in the black frock coat he always wore when he went outside for business—but this time with a brown leather suitcase at his feet.

"Master Tobias," I whispered. "Are you going to bring me back?"

"Would you go back?" He asked.

"No." I stared at him. "I've decided. I'll never return."

"I see," he murmured softly, looking away. His eyes wouldn't meet mine.

"Are you not here to bring me back?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"I don't have the right. You made your decision that day already, and I never told anyone about it." I relaxed my shoulders. "No one knows I know where you are."

"And—and you won't tell anyone?"

"If you don't want me to, I won't." I smiled.

"Thank you, Master Tobias."

"No," he said. "Please don't thank me. I don't deserve your thanks. I don't deserve anyone's. Eugene's, yours—all I've ever done is bring misfortune to both of you."

His eyes were still unable to meet mine, and that's when I realized how much he had always been hurting.

"That's not true. None of this is your fault, Master Tobias."

"You don't know me," he whispered. "That's why you're saying this."

"I do," I said. "You taught me a lot of things, like how the first time we played chess, you said no matter how hopeless a game looked, there was always a way to win. That day on the train, too, you also fought for my sake."

I remembered the days so vibrantly, those times he sat there in his room, tranquil and expressionless face facing the chessboard, telling me the secrets behind the house. Other times his face filled with creases, thinking of all the unhappiness we were doomed to face.

"No," he said, "that's only—"

"That day too!" I cut him off. "You worked so hard to find the will, and you also listened to Beth's conditions and assured Rachel Mondestin she would be safe!"

I remembered all the times he pretended to be stoic, but he thought of Beth as a sister and didn't simply use her as bait. He cared for my friends. His family.

"That's nothing compared to Eugene—"

"You never realized," I continued, "but you are an extremely kind person yourself. Everything you do is for the happiness of your family. You were always putting your own happiness last."

He finally turned to me, and our eyes met.

"You know," Tobias said, "I've thought of stealing you away from Eugene before. I've wanted to be heir, too. I have even hated him. I'm nothing like the saint you imagine I am."

"If you aren't, then why are you here?"

His eyes widened, but he couldn't reply.

I smiled.

"The answer is easy. It's because you care. It because you are an extremely, extremely, kind person. That's why, Master Tobias, you have to stop atoning. To live in this world, it's natural to hurt other people by accident."

He buried his face in his hands, and began to sob, ever so softly, shoulders trembling.

"Shuyan—" he whispered. "Can I really stop? Can I really stop atoning?"

I didn't even think as I started walking towards him and then wrapped my arms around him.

"Of course." I swallowed. "You've suffered more than enough." He gritted his teeth and pushed his face against my shoulder. The warm tears soaked through to my shoulders.

"I've always," he croaked out, slowly, painfully, "I've always wanted to hear someone tell me that."

He cried there in my arms, his face on my shoulder, crying out all the burden he carried with him his whole life.

When he was finished, he pulled himself away and stood up straight again, like he always did. His eyes were rimmed with red, but he smiled and looked at peace.

"I came to see you today because I wanted to apologize before I leave England."

"Leave?" I looked at the suitcase at his feet. "Where are you going?"

"It doesn't matter. Anywhere," he said. He turned to look at the window outside the parlor. The sunlight on the carpet of the room, like a golden door. "Eugene is the Lord now, and I know he'll manage the house fine."

"Will you return?" I asked. He shrugged.

"Maybe, if I ever find a reason too." He smiled again, his face more beautiful than ever. "Farewell, Shuyan. I wish you the best. Thank you for forgiving me and—" he stopped. "Thank you for existing."

He bent down to pick up the suitcase.

Something in my heart pulled.

He would be leaving soon, and I might never see him again, but I had to sever all my ties with the House of Beardsley.

So why did I feel so unsure? Why was I questioning my choice, hoping he could stay and ask me, once again, if I wanted to return?

"Shuyan?" He looked at me again. Then I was more sure of it than anything.

I loved all the people I met during my time working in the House of Beardsley. I loved them—and because of that, I had to leave. It was the only way I could do anything, the only way an unimportant girl like me could at least try and insure their happiness.

"Farewell," I said. "Farewell, Master Tobias."

"Tobias," he corrected me. "You're free, Shuyan."

"Tobias, then," I said. Then I laughed. "And you, too. You're free, too. We've both been freed." He nodded, then turned to walk outside.

I heard the innkeeper bid him farewell, the door open, and the door close again. This was it. I had severed my last tie with the Beardsleys.

I turned and raced outside, throwing open the door.

I had forgotten.

I had almost forgotten.

"Tobias!" I shouted. He turned to look at me, already a short distance away from me. "Tobias!" I shouted again. He turned around.

"What is it?" he asked.

I was crying—the tears had fell the moment he left—but I smiled despite it all.

"If we ever meet again," I said, "if we ever meet again, could we drink some tea again, as friends?"

He smiled, eyes softening.

"Yes, Shuyan."

"Can we play chess?"

"Yes, of course."

"I'll win," I sobbed, "I'll win against you one day. Ill get better and better, and I'll not disappoint you."

"I'll be waiting for that day."

He smiled, and turned, walking to where a black carriage was waiting. I watched him go inside and the carriage drive away, and despite the pain in my chest, I managed to smile the whole time.

I was no longer afraid. Everything that had happened would never disappear. They would stay inside me—Clo, Beth, and Rhiannon's words. Rudy and Matheus's acts of kindness. Fond memories of the nights we played cards, went to Ravensborough market, and ate leftover dessert with the valets. The time we to the department store, dressed up and danced with men, celebrated Christmas for the first time, and had a tea party all together.

Yes, and Eugene and Tobias would always be in my heart, the similar yet different faces, smiling, laughing, and crying, and all that they ever said to me.

I had left, but everything stayed in my heart.

Nothing could ever take it away.

"It had made a change to that one," I whispered to myself.