Authors note - this end goes weird my brother was pressuring me to get off the computer so here you o. I hope I can get another out today.

-CHAPTER FIVE-

I was on top of a cliff, with Tony again. I was smiling and everything was perfect, he loved me and I loved him it was as simple as that. Around us the sun shone and everything was perfect. Then his face changed and looked confused, he took my hand and led me to the edge of the cliff, the sky changed to grey and I could see the waves crashing beneath me, and I swallowed.

'Listen, I don't think it's going to work Triss.'

'What?' I asked, in a choked voice as the ground underneath me started moving, becoming more and more shaky until I could barely stand. Still Tony kept a tight grip on my hands.

'It's not you it's me' he replied apologetically as the ground underneath me collapsed entirely, lumps of earth flying next to me, spraying dirt into my eyes until I was near blinded but I clung onto Tony's hand. Looking up at him with tears in my eyes, hearing the waves crash underneath me.

'Pull me up' I yelled.

'I can't' he replied 'not again.'

He wasn't holding onto me anymore, it was just me gripping desperately onto his hand.

'Pull me up' I shouted again.

'You have to let go' he replied.

'What?'

'You have to let go of me.'

'But I won't survive' I cried, my arms in agony 'pull me up, please pull me up.'

'Not again Triss' he replied, then my hands failed and I went crashing into oblivion.

~ ~ ~ ~

'Triss get the fuck up' Kristy was yelling and ramming on my door 'you idiot, stop locking it. Get the fuck up.'

I opened my eyes.

'Stop swearing Kristy, your brothers around and you shouldn't be swearing anyway' said mum.

'It's not my fault my stupid sister is still asleep at eight fifteen.'

Eight fifteen. I sat up, opening my blind to see the blinding light fall onto my face making me cringe momentarily. Jake's room was empty, and completely clear. Mine was cluttered so I could barely see the floor.

'If your not out in five seconds I'm officially breaking down your door and killing you' yelled Kristy, slamming her hand against the wood.

'I'm up, I'm up' I replied, standing up and struggling into my clothes.

'If your not completely ready, downstairs and getting into the car within ten minutes I'm going without you and mum can't even get mad at me cos you lay in for an hour.'

'I know, I know' I said, only half listening while I dragged a brush through my hair. I shoved what was probably the wrong books into my bag and ran to the toilet to brush my teeth. Then I ran down the stairs, almost toppling over Simon in my rush and ran outside into the chilly morning air, Kristy was applying yet more lip gloss and leaning against the side of the car, she looked up at me. Her eyes scanning my outfit with distaste.

'You're not too late' she said 'shockingly enough. Maybe you won't be late for dates, if you ever go on one.'

'Thanks' I said.

'Triss there's nothing wrong with you, your pretty... I guess. But in that outfit-'

I sighed. I was wearing skinny jeans and a long, green t-shirt with a face faded into the background. She was wearing a tiny skirt and low cut top, which made her look stupidly revealed. 'Can we just get to school so I don't have to talk to you anymore?'

'Sure' she opened the door then her eyes slid over to the drive next to us.

'Hey Triss' called Misty and I turned round. She was stood by her brothers car, smiling at me. She looked nice, wearing a denim skirt and white blouse that opened at the next to show a heart shaped necklace.

'Hey Misty' I replied.

'Who are you?' asked Kristy.

'She's Misty' I said 'her family moved in next door on Friday.'

'Oh right. Hey I'm Kristy' she said, in a bored voice.

'Ignore her' I said to Misty.

'Happily' she replied.

Kristy ignored us 'come on Triss, let's get to school-' her voice tailed off when Jake walked out.

'Ready Misty?' he asked, ignoring both of us. Kristy's eyes visibly bulged as she saw him and she shut the car door.

'Hey, I'm Kristy' she said in a smooth, flirty voice that I once wished I could manage.

'Hello Kristy' he replied, his eyes flicking over her appearance. 'I'm Jake.'

'Oh, I love that name' she laughed annoyingly and flicked her hair.

'Yeah, I'm sure you do' he said, 'come on Mist, you'll be late.'

'Wouldn't that be awful' she replied sarcastically and he nudged her into the passenger seat where she sat down reluctantly, fastening her seatbelt as Jake started the car and rove off without looking back. I climbed into my passenger seat as Kristy out the keys in the ignition.

'I think I love him' she said.

'You have a boyfriend' I replied, slumping down in my chair.

'Nothing I can't sort out' she said.

'He's in my grade okay, and he won't go out with you.'

'What, cos you have dibs?' she looked at me.

'No. Because he's not like that.'

'Is he gay?'

I rolled my eyes and didn't answer the question. Kristy dropped me off round the corner again and instead of walking straight towards my group I hung back, glancing around the grounds. My school was average sized, but when everyone was out everywhere was packed. I couldn't help but search for Jake's car in the car park but he wasn't here yet. I shook my head and walked towards the math block. Thankfully Tony was nowhere to be seen. I sat down at the edge of the group, watching them talk animatedly. Our group were the 'plastics' of the school, but I stuck out like a sore thumb. They weren't bad people, they just stuck to a firm set of rules and acted and dressed in a certain way. I used to try and fit in more, but now I gave in. I was the different one among them and I was surprised that they hadn't ditched me, but it had never even been a problem weirdly enough. I guess going out with Tony for a year, who used to be the hottest guy in our year, had added to my profile. I swallowed hard and got my way through the day with my teeth gritted.

'Felicity, can you hold back for a while?' asked my math teacher as we were leaving.

'Sure' I dumped my bag on his desk and stood opposite him expectantly.

'Now Felicity' he said lightly.

'It's Triss' I said.

'Triss, I've noticed you've been distracted recently' he said 'well for a the last year or so, but recently especially.'

'Really?' I said, surprised. Recently I could understand, but for a year? But then again, what had happened over a year ago... still fresh in my mind and my heart.

'Listen I understand what it's like being a teenage girl growing up, between a girl and a woman.'

I raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. 'But you shouldn't let personal life get in the way of schoolwork.'

'I won't' I promised.

'Okay, you can go' I picked up my bag and he went back to paper work. I sighed, walking out into the street and seeing Kristy drive away with some guy sitting in the passenger seat. I sighed, switching on my headphones and started to walk towards home. Until a ar pulle dup next to me.

'Need a lift?'

'No thanks' I smiled at Tony, his friend Freddy was sitting in the passenger seat, it sounded like a romantic proposition.

'Oh come on Triss, it's going to get cold' he said, looking concerned until my heart tugged.

'No thanks, I need the exercise' I replied.

'Do you still hate me.'

I smiled 'no' I said through gritted teeth and watched him drive off. I stared at the floor, kicking aside some dead leaves. Then another car pulled up and I looked up with half blurred eyes.

'What's wrong?' Jake asked.

My heart turned over as I looked at his soft green eyes studying my face and I blushed 'I was-' I hesitated. 'No, it doesn't matter.'

'I thought you were getting a lift with Tony' he said.

'Well I didn't want one' I said.

'Are you sure, it's cold.'

When the hell did it become so freaking cold? Was I shivering?

'I'm fine.'

'I can give you one if you want' he said. My stomach flipped. A lift? Not a date of course, but... shut up Triss it's just a friend thing. I smiled.

'Yeah thanks' I said.