Unedited.

Sophie had decided black would be appropriate for this visit.

She only had about an hour before she had to get back to the airport, but that would be more then enough time.

Sophie had decided to wear jeans and a bit of a dressy black shirt with sneakers would be okay. She hadn't been to the address in years, but she still remembered it. A dozen white roses lay in her lap as she sat in a taxi. The taxi driver lost his smile when she told him the address, he nodded "My sympathies." He said before driving. Sophie stared at the single red rose in the midst of the white. Like a drop of blood in the snow, like the violence of a innocent soul being taken.

Kyle needed sleep before they continued their flight to Nebraska, when Sophie had stepped out of the hotel bathroom, dressed in black with with her hair brushed and clipped back slightly he smiled teasingly "You look like you are going to a funeral." He said. Sophie shot him a glare and he paled. "My bad." He said. "I forgot you lived here before." He said before rolling over on the couch. Sophie sighed and smoothed her shirt out, as she glanced at herself in the mirror. Everyone was quietly entertaining themselves, but had stopped at the knock on the door, even Kyle's head jerked up.

Sophie calmly opened the door, their stood a bellhop holding her order of flowers. She paid him, thanked him and waited till he left. Sophie looked over at her family. Fitz stood up, "No one goes alone." He reminded her, Sophie however had lost her fight to argue. She nodded as she called a taxi.
Now they sat in the back of the taxi, with the whole middle seat between them separating them.

Sophie knew this might be the last time she ever had the chance to pay her respects. She stared out at thew cloudy sky, that threatened to cry with her, the mood ironically fit what Sophie felt. Hanging low with a burden of tears, ready to let it go. Fitz had on jeans and a navy blue shirt that stretched across his chest making his shoulders look broader.
Sophie leaned her forehead against the cool window of the taxi that smelled of air freshener and pizza, mixing with the cologne coming from the driver. Staring at the grey sky, ready with a thunderstorm Sophie found herself lost in her memories.

She had sat in the back seat of the car, staring at the grey blue sky that looked like it was ready to sprinkle the earth with it's shower of kisses. She was in a black dress, and her booster seat allowed her to see outside, to the grey brown brick wall, the dark iron wrought gates, pressed open as the flood of cars passed through at a slow pace, that made Sophie itch to get out and walk herself.

Sophie found herself staring at the same gates as the taxi rolled to a stop. "I wait here?" Asked the driver in his Mexican accent. "Yes." Sophie said as she paid him. She unbuckled, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves she shoved the door open.

Headstones, markers, guardian angel statues, whatever the cold stone blocks were called, Sophie remembered exactly what Josh's looked like, and where it was. She remembered wanting to run ahead hug Nick who carried a corner of the tiny black coffin, his body shaking with silent sobs as he tried hard now to cry. As Sophie spotted the headstone every part of her froze. Her throat dried up and her knees locked. Fitz stopped beside her looking around wondering why this spot was so special.

"Wait here a min-" Sophie's voice failed as Fitz's took hold of her elbow to steady her. In truth Sophie hadn't known she had started swaying. "Don't go far." He said, solemn faced. He had realized he was in a cemetery. Sophie stumbled forward on numb legs, she reached the headstone and fell her knees,

Josh Gabriel Loskie.
A pure soul taken from us far to soon.
I live for life. -Josh G. Loskie.

Beneath it was the date of his birth and the ending of his life. "H-hey...J-Josh-" Sophie couldn't finish her sentence due to the sob that burst from her. She wanted to speak, to tell him of all the things he had missed, how much she missed him, about his namesake nephew, his niece who had been named after her. She wanted to just hug him one last time.

Strangely enough no tears came. Sophie could feel them behind her eyes, buildings up but not spilling over. "I miss you." She said touching his name carved into stone. "I...I found my place, my world. You would have liked my world." She said. She had promised she'd keep it brief. "It's still has it's kinks and knots that need sorting but...I'm happy, I'm finally understanding what you did all along." Sophie headed Fitz shuffle his feet, she smiled. "I want you to meet somebody." She said raising her head she reached her hand out to Fitz. He neared her, took it and let her pull him down next to her. He stared at the name, date and the words. "Josh, this is Fitz..." Half of Sophie's mind screamed at her not to do what she was doing. Telling her Fitz would think she was crazy.

"He's the one that found me." Sophie wasn't going to listen to that voice. She wasn't going to listen too the logical side of her mind. "He showed me a world neither of us knew existed, he took care of me when I was lost, and hurt." Sophie smiled, squeezing Fitz's hand half begging him to stay and half begging him to not look at her in this weak state. "Fitz this is Josh, he....he means a lot to me." Sophie said. Fitz wasn't weird about meeting a dead person, in fact he acted like he did it every day. "Hi Josh. Sophie's told me...a little bit about you, I guess I know why now." He said. "She said you were her best friend, and well I can't really thank you enough for being that to her. But now...now you don't have to worry about her. I'll make sure she doesn't get herself hurt. I'll take care of her now." Fitz promised.

He stared at the cold unmoving headstone, he lifted Sophie's hand, not really seeming to realize he was doing it he kissed her hand, squeezing it. Sophie could practically see Josh's ghost grinning his toothless grin at her and Fitz. Sophie pressed her fingers against the end date on the stone. She remembered the sunny day like it was yesterday.

~

"It smells funny in here." Five year old Sophie said wrinkling her nose, at the smell of the hospital. "Ssshhh sweety, it's rude to say that." Mom said as they approached the hospital bed. "She's right." Came the raspy voice from the bed. Sophie recognized it immediately. Breaking away from Mom, Sophie scrambled up to the bed, she raced past the heart monitor, IVs and other machines. She managed to get on the bed, "You're awake." She grinned at Josh who had a large cut on his forehead, an oxygen tube was taped under his nose.

He smiled weakly. His skin was pale, and dark circles were under his eyes as he raised his arms weakly. Sophie managed to hug him awkwardly. She heard the heart monitor's beeping quicken for a few heart beats, making small smiles appear on the haggard faces around her. Josh wrapped his arms around her, pressing her to him, holding her on his bandaged chest. His embrace was as warm as ever."Hey to you too." He rasped, tugging the small braid in her hair, Sophie had insisted on. "Are you in pain?" Sophie asked as she pulled away. Josh's smile was filled with pain but he lied "Of course not."

"Sophie." Josh said glancing around the room, that became deathly silent again. Josh held tight to Sophie's hand. "I'm weak...and it hurts to hang on, to fight." He explained. "You know what happened will never be your fault right?" He asked. Sophie was confused, "Don't blame yourself okay?" Josh asked. He waited until Sophie agreed. "Now I have an important question. I'll fight this...for you...but only if you tell me to." Sophie looked around the blank room, with cards set up around the room, wilting flowers and new bouquets. "You are in pain?" She asked, looking away from the tear streaked faces around her, and back to Josh who nodded slowly. "A lot of it." He said, "I'm tired, and I don't want to fight anymore."

Sobs broke out from Mrs. Loskie and Mom. "But if I tell you to, you will fight it?" Sophie asked. Josh smiled, "Yes." The beeping picking up for only a moment, before settling back to it's normal pace. Sophie could see the pain in his eyes, every breath he took was labored his skin was clammy and the bruises on his skin were paling to green. Everything about him was weary, Sophie could see it'd be selfish and cruel to make him fight any longer. She didn't want to let him go, she didn't want him in pain either.

Sharing is caring. Giving something that you wanted up to someone you cared about meant you were loving them. Sophie crawled forward again, laying on top of him again she wrapped her arms around him, "You don't have to fight anymore." Those six words made something inside of Sophie snap, break and shatter, like a hole punched into her chest. She hugged Josh tighter. "Not if you don't want to." She cried. Josh wrapped his arms around her again. "Thank you." He breathed in relief. "Thank you so much." He said breathlessly. His own tears of relief and sadness falling.

"Be happy okay Sophie." He said. "Promise me that." He said. "I promise." Sophie managed to say. "Thank everyone. For giving me a life that was worth living, and thank you for letting me go." Josh said through his tears. "I love you all. Be strong, be brave and be happy." He looked back down at Sophie. "Take care..." His voice was fading as his muscles started loosening. His heart monitor slowing, with each beat. "Soph-"

Beep,.....beep.......beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!

Sophie refused to let go of Josh, no matter who tried pulling her away, that night she had spent sobbing and wailing anytime someone tried pulling her away from his lifeless body. The next day, she had washed her eyes and waited. She watched the doctors wheel Josh's covered body away, her eyes were dry as she took her Nick's hand, he picked her up, and carried her to the car, where he buckled her in, kissed her forehead like he did all the time and promised he'd see her soon.

For one trip to the hospital for a few stitches from falling off the monkey bars became weekly trips to get exams, check ups and pretty soon over night stays, he had explained to Sophie a disease was in him and that the doctors had found it in his heart, had made a story of the disease taking him over and he'd become a superhero, but in the end he told her the truth, and the disease had been caught to late to do anything about, and he didn't want his heart replaced, because he didn't want to forget the people he loved, he didn't want to replace them, and he didn't want to replace his best friend.

~

Sophie found herself sobbing as she clutched onto Fitz's shoulder. Fitz had seen the whole flashback, he had seen the goodbye, the funeral, the white rose that looked like angel wings blooming from a stem, spreading across the shiny coffin. He had seen Josh. Fitz wrapped his arm around Sophie, holding her close not only for her comfort but for his. He finally understood Josh.

He had been there in the memory just as much as Sophie had been. He felt the burden on Sophie's shoulders, the pain still inside her. The aching sadness and the bittersweet memories. He felt that she was in pain. "Let's go." He whispered as he wiped her tears away. Sophie took several deep breaths to calm herself before turning back to the headstone. "I'm happy now Josh. I fulfilled my promised." She said through her tears taking deep breaths desperate to stop crying, she laid the roses at the headstone. Scrubbed away her tears, and was thankful she had her handkerchief. Blowing her nose and wiping her eyes one more time she stood up.

Fitz stood with her. Sophie let her fingers linger on the cold stone, taking one more deep breath she let go. All the way, the burden rolled off of her like a sack of rocks, it was like she had been carrying around a ton she hadn't even realized she had, it was gone, in that one long slow breath that she let out. Fitz wrapped his arm around her shoulders looking down at her. "Will you be okay?" He asked. Sophie felt relief of finally having let go of that pain, she nodded. "I'm okay." She nodded, letting a smile slip through. "Let's get back to the hotel." She said.

Back in the taxi, Fitz sat next to Sophie keeping hold of her hand, as if being sure she wasn't about to break from grief. "You remind me of him." Sophie said. Fitz looked startled at her voice that was raspy but other wise normal. "I do?" He asked. Sophie nodded. As rain started pouring down, washing away the pain Sophie carried. The taxi rolled to a stop in front of the hotel. "I'll tell you about him later." Sophie promised smiling up at Fitz. She would tell him.