A lot had changed in the past year, but then again one whole year is a long period of time. It was a normal morning, the sun shone brightly, the air was cool, and the mood was light. Usually, the group of friends would meet up before heading on campus, but as usual someone would end up holding the group. They saw a running Gary, barely dressed, approach them, mahogany hair dishevelled and wavy, and one shoe in his hand. Not holding back, he approached his companions, all donning smirks or holding back laughs. Finally doing his buttons up, he sarcastically laughed at the group and got into Shauna's car. There were two cars, and since Shauna and Drew were the oldest, they got their licences first. Thus, much to their annoyance, they became the groups designated drivers.

The journey was long, and quiet. No one really spoke, almost as if they were nervous. Small sounds could be heard from the radio, which Misty silently hummed to. Gary was in the back seat, elbow resting on the door, playing with his phone in his hand. He hadn't gotten much sleep that night, it wasn't something he wasn't used to by now. However, no one really pressed on the topic, because frankly people could correctly guess what he was up to every night. Shauna stopped at a set of traffic lights, shifting down and then sitting back into her seat. Her brown skin glowing in the summer-time sun, hair gently flowing. Her eyes darted into her rear-view mirror.

Absent-mindedly, Gary failed to notice her gaze was fixed on him. She hated awkward silences, but she also wasn't a fan of bad conversation starters. On her left, Misty nudged her elbow slightly, cocking her head towards the young man's direction. Shauna let out a small noise, rubbing her arm slightly, eyebrows furrowing. The two continued to stare at each other before Shauna let out a sigh. The lights turned green and every so often she would look at Gary in her mirrors. After a small stretch of road, she finally spoke. Her tone quite and nervous. She knew the answer of course, but still, hope remains even in the darkest of days.

"No Ash?" You could almost cut the tension in the car with a knife, and there wasn't any escape. She anxiously looked at Gary, however after the question was asked Shauna's eyes were averted back on to the road. Her demeanour as almost as if she asked a perfectly reasonable question. But she knew she was on dangerous grounds, for she knew that the air would instantly become fractious when the topic of Ash was mentioned. Gary had shaken his head and sighed, once again turning again to look outside the window, looking for a distraction.

His eyes flickered between shops and trees, every so often his pupils dilating at the sounds outside. He wished things were normal, he wished things were different. But he knew better than to wish for things now. Nothing could change the situation with Ash, at least not now anyways. Every night he would stay awake, trying to talk to his best friend. But he felt like he was Ash's brother, and so he wouldn't stop trying. But there comes a moment in time where all roads feel like they don't lead anywhere. Gary felt that way for the last year, but inside his determination flared, igniting new sparks and rejuvenating his hopes. He was no quitter, a lesson Ash himself imparted on the young man himself.

He would not give up on his brother. Not now. Not ever.

But his mind aimlessly wandered to a long-existing memory. Something that changed the way people saw him. Gary was the first to see Ash that day, after Alice left. An image he would never forget.

**One Year Ago**

"ASH! ASH! Damn it pick up your phone" Gary cursed, nerves on edge. He was supposed to meet up with Ash after his talk with Alice, but he still waited in the car park for over an hour. He knew something was off, the air felt tense. Something in his chest screamed at him to go look for Ash but his mind told him everything was fine. If only he listened to his gut feeling.

The group waited with Gary, but one by one they filtered out. Not wanting to wait any longer in the ever-increasing hail. The mahogany haired man knew this and felt guilty for making them wait with him, so soon it was only himself and Shauna. They sat in her car, heaters on full, but it did very little given the temperatures outside. Dropping ever so slightly, every so often. Gary's leg continued to twitch, and he couldn't stay still. He knew this wasn't like Ash at all. His fingers turning white and balling his fists in his lap. "Why hasn't he texted or called?! It's been over an hour dammit".

Shauna was slightly put off by his aggressive tone. Her tensed shoulders soon relaxed as the tension in the car dissipated, the small hum of the heaters the only sounds left. The wind blew harder outside, and Gary became more and more nervous. Shauna was always someone that could read Gary like a book. She knew him for the longest time, after Ash himself of course. To her, he was the same nerdy boy she knew back during the start of school. Always arrogant, never liking things going against his will. But he also showed undying care for the people close to him. Something in which she admired about him, but the day he would admit this is the day rain fell upwards.

She slowly planted her palm on his shoulder, gently pressing into the leather of his jacket. Initially he flinched slightly, unaware of the contact. However, his posture relaxed and he rested his head on the seat, letting out a sigh. His breath visible now inside of the car, he looked at the girl next to him. Her thumb gently rubbing is shoulder, providing the little comfort he needed to be more at ease. "He'll be okay, they're probably just caught up inside." Her gently voice soothed Gary's internal conflict, reassuring him a little. After a long pause, the girl wondered if Gary would ever say anything, but eventually he slumped in his seat and exhaled deeply.

Nodding his head, he muttered his words. "You're right, let's go..." His voice trailing off, eyes dropping down. He didn't like it, but he knew they couldn't wait forever, and one and a half hours was long enough. Shauna gave a small nod and turned the key into the ignition. Her eyes staring intensely at the road ahead, her wipers doing very little in terms of helping her visibility. She moved off at a slow pace, back upright, eyes slightly squinted. The hail turned into snow and the roads became increasingly dangerous. Nerves grew inside of the young girl but she endeavoured to keep going.

The car passed the gates and they drove past the campus field. A thick layer of white gently wrapping itself on the grass; it was almost so barely any shades of green were left. Gary lost his mind in thought, and looked out of the window, noticing that the snow was getting worse and he fogged his window slightly. Using his jacket, he removed the moisture off the glass, catching something in the corner of his eyes. Something was on the ground, unmoving, small layer of snow on top. Gary pursed his eyes together to get a better view, it was a fair distance away, but his eyes soon widened, pupils dilating. Without even a moment of second thought, he opened the passenger door and ran out into the cold.

Shauna jerked her head over, slowing the car down until stationary. "Gary what the h-...." He was already long gone, running straight ahead. Her eyes widened from the sudden action and she took her keys out. She watched the young man jump over the small fence to the field, a small trail of snow being kicked up in his fast movements. She got out and locked her car. Gary wasn't usually so brash, not without reason anyways, so her heart told her it was serious. She carefully walked onto the snow, struggling for any traction and grip. Her shoes fit for driving, not snow.

Regardless she trudged along the same route Gary took, and with some extra effort, she jumped the fence as well, almost stumbling on the ground. This wasn't ideal for her. Her jacket provided little warmth, but her nerves and slight jog warmed her systems to the point her breath became jagged and irregular. Yet she maintained her jog, breaking out into a sprint when the snow thinned out beneath her feet. Crunching sounds between each step. She got closer and closer to the mahogany haired boy, seeing him kneel down next to something. Getting a closer look however, she realised it wasn't something. It was someone. This realisation fuelled her determination as her strides became more continuous and faster.

Her new-found athleticism gave her a surge of adrenaline and soon she approached the kneeling boy, hearing only a few words escape his lips. "ASH! ASH WHAT HAPPENED?!" Her eyes widened at the words and she soon caught up an kneeled down next to her the raven haired boy. He was on his knees, palms firmly on the ground, eyes closed. She did not fail to notice however his eyes were puffy and there was less snow below his head.

"He's been crying Gary. What happened to him?" She could only muster up the energy for a few words, slowly remaining still in order to catch her breath. But her eyes were firmly fixated on her friend. Soon though she looked at Gary who felt her gaze upon him, slowly raising his head to meet her hazel eyes. His eyes were wavering and conflicted, not fully understanding the situation they were in. He averted his gaze and put one of his arms around Ash's shoulders and lifted him up slightly.

Shauna caught on and did the same on his other side. Ash's eyes opened at the movement and met hers. His once chocolate eyes, so full of life and passion, never felt so empty. His features were dull, and cheeks were purple. She could only guess as to how long he had been like this, and in all honesty, she was reluctant on finding out. Hearing a loud vibration, she saw Gary take off his jacket and wrap it around the boy. He was slightly heavier than she thought, and definitely taller, but she managed to wrap it around his shoulders, only just realising his hands, despite wearing his gloves, were shivering. Reaching out to his hand, she felt them twitch but they didn't move. His hands were numb, and his legs were shaky. Her lower lip trembled as they both stood up, supporting his weight entirely. Gary and Shauna looked at each other, searching each other for answers.

Not a moment later, Shauna broke the silence. "Let's take him home". She would not usually sound so demanding and firm, but the situation called for it and Gary was in no position to disagree. With a simple nod of his head, they kept Ash stable and walked him to the car. Having to go the long way round because of the fence, the snow simmered and much to the appreciation of the two, Ash didn't notice however, eyes firmly fixed on the ground. Exchanging looks of doubt and concern, Shauna unlocked the car and Gary helped his friend in the passenger seat.

Gary sat in the back with Ash, something which Shauna found surprising but chided herself for thinking he would do something else. When Gary needed to step up, he stepped up. But her new-found admiration was shorted lived, for there more pressing matters at hand. Turning the ignition key, she adjusted her mirror and looked at Ash one last time. Eyes closed, leaning on the shoulder of his friend. She found her eyes watering and flailing, but she had a job to do.

"You're safe now Ash."

The car ride was a long one, Shauna was driving as fast as she could, but the roads being icy and wet proved difficult. Every so often at traffic lights, she would steal glances at the boys in the back. Ash was still asleep, clothes soaked and hair drenched. Each time she would look at him her heart sank lower, but not knowing how he was even worse. Gary's eyes were transfixed on something and nothing. He looked so defeated and helpless, lost in his own world, covering Ash slightly for warmth.

Soon though Ash moved slightly, from the turns and movement of the car, slowly waking up, clutching his neck in agony. He let out a small groan that was audible to both Gary and Shauna, pulling them both out of thought. Gary sat there a little stunned at the sudden awakening, but soon composed himself and moved away slightly, giving him some space. They were going to question him, but reluctance held their tongues back, seeing this as not the best time to ask questions. Ash's eyes darted to his new surroundings, once realising the situation, his shoulders relaxed into his seat, a small 'squelch' sound from his damp cloths against the cotton seats. He sighed.

His mind played back to the scene with Alice, new tears developing on the brim of his auburn eyes. He sniffed and felt Gary tug him closer into a hug. "She's gone Gary. She left." Gary could just about make out what he said, deciphering the wavering tone and sombre notes of his groggy voice. His tears had stained Gary's sweatshirt and his sobs grew louder. He muttered inaudible words, triggering a flash of concern on Shauna's face as she continued towards Ash's house. They were almost there, so for now mentally agreed to drop the subject. Only until they got him into some dry clothes and put some food inside of him. Regardless Shauna couldn't help but feel guilty in some way, wanting to do nothing more than hug the boy and quell his pain.

Finally arriving at his house, it was dark and wet outside. Shauna couldn't help but criticise the irony, but she opened Ash's door and grabbed his bag for him. However, what she didn't expect, was for him to tug back. Their gazes met each other's; her brown eyes looked deep inside of his auburn ones. A deepening abyss. Her pupils dilated as she relinquished her grip of his bag, and moved away slightly, almost frightened. Guilt rose in the pit of Ash's stomach, but he soon exited her car and began his walk up to his front door, however before he could take more than a couple of steps, a small hand weaved inside of his.

He refused to turn around. He couldn't let them see him like this, but Shauna's hand remained firm; his head sinking lower. She tugged once, no reply. She tugged again, still no reply. He wasn't moving and it broke her heart each time. "Ash, please...." her voice low and fractious, not even realising her eyes were watering themselves. Fed up she walked around the raven-haired boy, putting her hand slightly over her mouth. Tears rolled off his cheeks continuously, his eyes red surprised. Without hesitation she ran into Ash, hugging him. Her small frame barely reaching his chin, arms snaked behind his back. He gently reciprocated the gesture, using his free hand to hold her opposite shoulder.

Gary stood behind the two, not wanting to crowd Ash at the minute. His head and heart telling him to confront his friend; he knew Ash but he had never seen him like this. He remained stunned for a moment, seeing the new developments and his eyes softened. Shauna was the mother-like figure of their little group. Always said the right things at the right time. Gary now found himself admiring her a little and decided to let her have her moment. She gave him what he couldn't. Unrequited love and support.

However, their moment was cut short as he moved away from Shauna. He gave her a long-lasting look, wiping the tears off her cheeks. Soon doing the same to his own. The wind blew slightly, and the trees rustled, Ash had only now realised it was dark now. He hated himself for making his friends go through so much effort, but he appreciated their efforts. He leaned down, just near enough to Shauna's ear, her dark brown hair fluttering with the breeze. "Thank you." His tone was soft and pained, almost struggling to get the words out. He slowly kissed her cheek before moving back, swiftly turning on his heel.

His eyes met Gary's, for the first time in a while. Gary tried to decipher the story beneath his tears, desperately wanting to alleviate the sorrow but Ash simply nodded in his direction. Almost as if they had a full conversation within one movement. The young girl watched this interaction but didn't need an explanation. The bond the boys shared was beyond friendship, almost biological with the way they immediately understood the thoughts of one another. Gary got his message. He wanted some time to himself.

"We'll be here if you need us" Gary tried to reassure his friend but it did little, something he knew but he remained confident. Nodding once again, Ash turned and walked up the steps to his house, the door already open. Ash's mum, Delia, saw this interaction, a puzzled look on her face, even more so when Ash walked straight past her dropping his bag and Gary's coat on the small table near the door. Delia turned back to Shauna and Gary, her expression asking for answers, but she received none. Soon the three of them heard a door close, a sighing Delia finally inviting the pair in out of the cold.

Gary quickly brought Delia up to speed about the situation, and given how little he actually knew, she was far from happy. Delia felt disappointed in herself for not being there for her son, but she knew she could not have done much. Their relationship was strained and fragile ever since Ash's father passed away. A situation the pair of them never got over, but Delia would normally shut herself off from Ash and at one point in time she couldn't even look at him. The same eyes, the same untamed hair, the same deep soothing voice. At the time she couldn't even look at her seven-year-old son, and deep down she hated it. However, before she could think about past events much longer, a loud thud could be heard, a knock on the door.

Gary texted the rest of the group to come over, giving them a brief summary of things. He knew Ash needed space, but he wouldn't let his friend walk through the storm alone. They each cared for him and came as quickly as possible. Outside Dawn looked through the front window to see if anyone was coming, her foot tapping repeatedly on the stone slabs. The group were nervous to say the least, but they got a little relief when a few moments later, Gary had opened the door. Instantly seeing his gaze and the sombre expression he carried on his face, the group deduced that the situation was grave. He stepped backwards, allowing access for everyone into Ash's house and they slowly filtered into the front room.

"How is he?" May asked, clutching both her hands close to her chest. She was reluctant to ask but seeing the nervous faces in Ash's front room did little to calm her nerves. They all had the same question on their minds and nervously waited for Gary's reply, however he looked towards the group and shook his head slightly. Delia waved a hand towards the staircase, granting permission to her son's room. She knew they would be able to do more than she ever could. In some ways, she admired Ash for getting such a good group of friends, but again she felt that he replaced her purely because she strained their relationship when her husband died. Her eyes grew softer and soon as the group were upstairs, she sat on the sofa, her head in her hands.

They all headed to Ash's room upstairs and knocked on his door. His house was relatively clean, but this wasn't surprising since there was only two people living here. Still, the group found it odd that there weren't any pictures or photos anywhere. Of course, Gary knew the problems Ash had behind closed doors, especially his relationship with Delia, but he left it to Ash to decide who knew his personal information. It just wasn't his place to say. They gathered around Ash's door, reluctant to knock, but leaving the house without seeing him wasn't an option. Drew stepped forwards, taking the lead.

"Ash?.....Ash?....." Drew calmly called out, not wanting to startle him. After wrapping his palm around the door handle, the plain white door gave way to a reasonably sized room, a very small hue of light being emitted from a lamp on a wooden desk. There were posters of football teams, trophies on the large desk near the corner of the room for various awards such as sports and attendance. The room was painted in a modern grey colour with the blinds fully drawn, blocking the light coming in from the window. This plunged the entire room into darkness. Scanning the room, Ash was seen on the bed, facing away from the group.

His trainers thrown to the side haphazardly with his bag near the foot of the bed. Shauna quickly noticed that Ash still wore his soggy clothes from before, not even bothering to change them. She shared a quick look with Gary, which was interrupted by Dawn who stepped closer to the lying boy. He was curled up, holding a pillow. Sitting on the bed she gently shook his shoulder while the rest of the group inched closer to the bed.

There was no response and the look in her eyes softened. They all felt like they had lost a part of them as they continued to look at Ash's back, hoping for him to get up and say he was alright, say he was joking with them. But that never happened. He ignored all their attempts, wanting to be alone. The group sighed, wishing and wanting they could do more. But they were helpless, and they hated themselves for it. After saying some encouraging words to Ash, the group filtered back out of the room. They didn't want to intrude and thought they would try again in the morning.

With that, sooner or later the group all left, but not before Gary looked at his best friend once more, wishing that he would be back to his normal self again soon. But what they didn't see was that Ash's eyes were teary, and once they had left his house, his feelings were let free as he was unable to hold the pain of heartbreak inside him for any longer.

Author's Note

Second chapter guys. I don't know how many chapters this story will have, but I want to take it slowly so there may be quite a few. Anyways leave a review and tell me what you think. Thanks!