The Roast of Anato
(Here comes Anato's roasting session.)
Amanda: Actually, Anato first appearance was in the OC book. It was a story of a big, boasty girl and her battle against herself.
(She looks at Anato, who was sitting on a chair.)
Amanda: Now I'm not saying you're ugly, but the villians aren't scared of you, they just can't stand your little school girl face... Ah well who am I to talk? Anato, you beat me in fights so often, I feel like JD's fists. And respect for him.
(Junebug comes onto the plate.)
Junebug: Oh Anato, Anato, Anato.. I've had a lot of ghosts surround me, but you were by far the worst. It was like talking to a pizza made of hair and bubblegum.
(Anato smiles softly as everyone else chuckles.)
Junebug: Speaking of talking, Anato is bilingual. English, Japanese, French.. And everything else cause she's a show off f***.
(Anato laughs too.)
Junebug: They call Maya the skinny legend. But next to Anato, Thicky Nicky would be the skinny legend. I love you you Guinea b****!
(Rosaline comes up with a piece of paper and begins to speak something in Russian.)
Rosaline: Анато, я даже чувствую себя плохо из-за того, как другие люди относятся к тебе! И я живу с призраком, который задушил двух человек.
(Translation: Anato, I even feel bad about the way other people treat you! And I live with a ghost that strangled two people.)
(Bakugou steps up to the plate.)
Bakugou: Look, Anato's not the perfect girlfriend, Okay? The only way I can get her fat a** to save me is to say I baked her a cake. I don't even own a stove.
(People laugh at his joke.)
Bakugou: And in bed? Well let's just say it's like someone's holding the B button the entire time.
(Oooh!)
Bakugou: Hey, I'll take what I can get. Mostly I'm jealous of the others trying to get her. At least there's something going into her pipes... Now I won't say our next roast is in the closet, but she's definitely f***ed over more dudes than the Hard Rain campaign. Callie Maria Hansen everyone!
(Callie steps to the podium.)
Callie: Anato, your content appeals to everyone. Young, old. Casual weebs.. Really casual weebs. Seriously, if you yourself were any easier, you'd be princess Ruby!
(Ruby blows a kiss.)
Callie: But there have been bad anime performances.. The ones starring Shina!
(Shine starts drinking her martini.)
Callie: Roleplays with CarllovesAnime ? Seriously, I have never seen a bigger bomb. And I know the boomer!!
(The boomer gives off a growl and a thumbs up.)
Callie: And Sailor ice herself? Come on! Your persona blew so hard, All of my Valve cartridges started working again!
(Shina continued to drink till drunk.)
Callie: Shina, you suck so much, even your evil clone is a piece of crap. Black f***ing Ice? Jesus Christ, I'd rather play as one of Coach's cheeseburgers.
(Shina growls and comes onto the stage in a drunken fit, shoving her down as Callie's lover gets her back up.)
Shina: Oh ha ha! Everybody loves Anato!!
(A stagehand tries to pull her away.)
Shina: Hey get your hands off of me! I should be the star! I jump higher than you! I'm taller than you!
Bakugou: Not where it counts!!
(The other laugh at his joke.)
Shina: You b****!
(She throws up into a bag and gets escorted off the stage as Anato comes onto the podium.)
Anato: Somebody just rewatched some fan made movies. Ah Jesus Christ, this is what I get?! A ghost lover with an eating disorder, a bad a** chick dating a psycho, and a half angel, half devil?! You're like a Bravo reality show's crack baby!
(Everyone laughs at her remark.)
Anato: It's no wonder that Deku's back is so tired; I've been carrying you all for months! Ha ha.. Ah well, enjoy tonight. But remember, who keeps you all working? Here's a hint.. It's me! Anato! Peace out b****es!!
(She turns into her hero form and flies away.)
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