EPS 4: INTERVIEW WITH MATTY BURGESS - RECORDED ON 28TH JULY 4.44PM
(The audio crackles. There's a lot of background noise. In the distance, we can hear children laughing and shrieking. A car beeps its horn loud and harsh, a thundercrack of sound.)
Saskia: Are you sure you don't want to go somewhere a bit quieter? A café maybe?
Matty: No. No, right here is best. Outside. We need to be outside.
Saskia: Okay. No problem. So, I'm just going to do a little intro, and then we'll start, is that okay? (There is a pause) Okay. (Clears throat). So, hey Sassies, this is Saskia Jones here with another episode of A Whole Lot of Sass. Today I am...
(Saskia's voice fades, drowned out by the cries of a group of children shouting and screeching.)
Saskia: Today, I'm at East Brighton Park, with Matty Burgess. Matty was a resident at Collindale Psychiatric Unit at the time when Amelia was also admitted. Matty, firstly let me start by saying thank you for agreeing to talk with me today. I know this isn't easy for you and I really do appreciate you taking time to chat with me about Amelia during your stay at Collindale.
Matty: Stay? You make it sound like a holiday park.
Saskia: (laughs nervously) Right, yeah, of course. That's not what I meant. Sorry.
Matty: That's okay. I suppose people don't really know how to frame it. It's not the easiest of conversation starters.
Saskia: How do you want to start?
Matty: (pauses) I... I don't really know. Then again, I don't really know how to do anything anymore.
Saskia: Because of your time in residency?
Matty: No... I mean yes, partly. But mostly, because of her. Because of Amelia.
Saskia: Because of what she did to you?
Matty: This isn't about what she did. What she did doesn't matter.
Saskia: I'm surprised to hear you say that, Matty. She attacked you. I know she was your friend, but you suffered significant damage to your eyes. The accident report said you experienced redness, swelling, visual disturbances... you yourself told me that you're still experiencing the visual problems. That's got to be tough?
Matty: I'll get over it. In time. But Amelia... well, she won't, will she?
Saskia: Can you tell me about her? About when you first met her? What was she like?
Matty: I thought you knew her? You said you went to school together?
Saskia: We went to the same school. That's not the same as knowing her. I used to see her around, we'd say hi. That was it. I wouldn't say I knew her at all. Plus, the girl I knew at school was clearly not the same girl you knew at Collindale.
(A car revs its engine close by. Children shriek at the noise.)
Matty: (his voice is tight and a touch colder than before) Right. Okay. I must have misunderstood. I thought you were friends. I thought that's why you were doing this. I'm not sure I should be speaking with you. I should go.
Saskia: (sounding panicked) Matty, please, don't go! Please...
Matty: (louder) Don't touch me!
Saskia: Okay, I'm sorry, please, I just don't want you to go! Matty, look, I'm sorry if you've misunderstood but I never said Amelia and I were friends. But that doesn't mean I don't care. The reason I'm doing this is because I happen to think not enough people care about what happened to her. People don't just disappear. They don't. Someone knows something and I really want to find out what that is.
Matty: No matter what that is?
Saskia: No matter what it is. I mean it, Matty. I care. I do. I want to find out what happened to Amelia. I want people to know her story.
Matty: People aren't ready for her story.
Saskia: What do you mean?
(The audio crackles again. There is a faint whispering, it's unclear whether it's Saskia or Matty.)
Saskia: Look, Matty, whatever her story is, we can't keep it buried. We have to tell her truth.
Matty: (laughs coldly) You sound like the psych doctors at Collindale.
Saskia: Oh, hell. I'm guessing that's not a good thing?
Matty: Some were okay, some were... persistent with their psycho-babble bullshit.
Saskia: Which was Dr. Kinghorne? An okay doctor or psycho-babble doctor?
Matty: Kinghorne? He was... well, he wasn't psycho-babble, but he wasn't okay either.
Saskia: Why not?
Matty: He wouldn't leave Amelia alone. It was like he thought he was her saviour or something. He singled her out from the moment she arrived.
Saskia: You think his intentions were... sinister?
Matty: Not sinister as such. Just... I don't know. There were rumours that he had connections with Amelia's dad. That he'd been Amelia's therapist before she came to Collindale. There was a familiarity about the way he was with her. As if he already knew her in some capacity. He wasn't like that with the rest of us.
Saskia: Did Amelia ever speak of him? Ever mention that she knew him or had maybe been treated by him before her residency?
Matty: No. Nothing specific. But I remember her saying something about how her dad had probably paid him to keep her there.
Saskia: You do know who Amelia's father is, right?
Matty: (bitterness creeps into his tone) Oh, yeah. I know who he is.
Saskia: Doesn't sound like you think much of him?
Matty: I don't think much of any of her family. They washed their hands of her. Tried to get her incarcerated permanently. At least, that's what Amelia said. And as for her dad... the great Inspector Austen. Or should I say Chief Inspector. You know he's been promoted recently?
Saskia: Yes, I did hear.
Matty: He's not going to like this, you know? You digging up the past?
Saskia: It's hardly the past. It's only been a year since she disappeared. And if this could help find out what happened to her...
Matty: Why the Hell do you think he's Chief Inspector now? Because no one knows what happened and it's in his best interests for it to stay that way.
Saskia: Are you saying he's involved?
Matty: No, of course not. I don't think... look, all I'm saying is that it's definitely helped him for the whole thing to be laid to rest. Amelia brought embarrassment on the family. They were... ashamed of having a daughter with her kind of problems. Especially after Collindale and what she did to Kinghorne. Didn't you ever wonder why no criminal proceedings were brought against her? Why she was eventually released? I mean, she blinded him in one eye. They buried it. They buried all of it. I shouldn't even be talking to you. They won't like it.
(There's a break in the audio. White noise prickles through like static.)
Saskia: Amelia's family?
(Matty doesn't reply.)
Saskia: Okay. Let's go back a bit, yeah? To your time in Collindale. When you met Amelia. What did you think of her? How did you two become friends?
Matty: How does anyone become friends in a place like that? You'd think that all the crazies would have something in common, right? But most of the time, you're on your own. You've got to navigate your way through a place like that. Work the system. Do what you must do to get out. And most of the time, they don't like you to form friendships.
Saskia: Why not? Surely, it's helpful for patients to form connections? Gives them something good and healthy to focus on?
Matty: You would think, right? But they don't want you comparing notes, do they? They don't want you getting ideas. They want you compliant. They want you to be good little boys and girls who don't cause any trouble. Take you pills, do your therapy, and shut the Hell up.
Saskia: I take it, they didn't like that you and Saskia were friends?
Matty: They thought... that she was a bad influence. That she would make people think like she did. They didn't want the other residents to believe her.
Saskia: Believe what?
Matty: Believe what was happening to her. They didn't want us to believe what she said. I get it. I do. Collindale is full of kids with personality disorders, kids who do the whole copycat thing. Kinghorne used to call it mirroring. Amelia wasn't like the others. She had this way about her, I don't know what to call it, but people wanted to be her friend. She was like... ultraviolet light, you know what I mean? But the psych unit actively discouraged it. Some said they even purposely triggered her outbursts to ensure people kept their distance.
Saskia: (whistles as she exhales) Wow. That would be pretty screwed up if they did. Their job should be to help the residents, not make things worse. Matty... do you think they had any hand in what caused Amelia to attack you? Or Dr. Kinghorne?
Matty: That thing with Kinghorne... well, I wouldn't put it past him to do something to ensure she couldn't get out but I'm betting he never expected things to work out the way they did. I mean, I hated the guy but what happened to him was... awful. As for me, I don't know. Amelia's health had started deteriorating a few days before. She wasn't eating. Wasn't talking much to anyone, even me. It all started when her little sister came to visit...
Saskia: Amelia's sister? That's... (there's a pause) Abigail, right? She was a few years younger than Amelia if I recall.
Matty: Yeah. Amelia doted on her. I don't know what happened entirely. All I know is that Amelia was so excited that Abigail was coming. Her family didn't really come and see her very often. It meant so much for her to see Abigail. But something happened. Something that really freaked Amelia out.
Saskia: Did she tell you what that was?
(Matty doesn't answer. In the background, a child screams as if hurt and a woman can be heard consoling them.)
Saskia: Matty?
Matty: She said... she said it wasn't her sister.
Saskia: What? But Collindale staff wouldn't just let anyone in? And Abigail would have been... I don't know, about 12 at the time? Someone must have brought her there. She wouldn't have been alone.
Matty: You don't understand... (gasps audibly) Did you hear that?
Saskia: Hear what? That kid crying?
Matty: No... forget it, forget it.
Saskia: Matty, are you okay? Do you want to take a break?
Matty: No. I promised myself I'd say what I needed to say, then go. I want this over with now. I've been silenced too long. But it's not easy. The truth isn't easy. Not when they want it kept quiet.
Saskia: They? Meaning Amelia's family?
(Again, Matty doesn't reply.)
Saskia: Okay. Let's return to Abigail. You claim Amelia said it wasn't her sister. Why would she say that, especially if she doted on her?
Matty: She said that it... that's what she called her... it. She said it wasn't Abigail. She said it came to deliver her a message.
Saskia: What message?
Matty: It... sorry, Abigail brought her a book. It was Amelia's favourite from home. It was like her Bible, you know. She'd been looking forward to getting it. Hashtag Authentic, I think. She talked about it a lot.
Saskia: I don't get it. Amelia was adamant that the person visiting her wasn't Abigail, but that person brought her the book she'd been asking for? How can it have not been her sister?
Matty: I don't know.
Saskia: And did she say what message Abigail, or it gave her?
Matty: It was a photograph.
(There is a pause. The playing children seem to get louder, their excitable shrieks becoming shriller.)
Saskia: (her voice has a nervous edge to it) A photograph? You're sure it was a photograph?
Matty: Yeah... I wouldn't forget that. The photograph changed everything. Wait... are you okay? You look a bit shaken up?
Saskia: Um. Yeah, yeah, of course, I'm fine. So, did you happen to see the photograph? Matty?
Matty: (almost a whisper) Yeah, I saw it.
Saskia: What was in the photo?
Matty: Amelia. Amelia was in the photo.
Saskia: Like, a portrait photo?
Matty: No. It was a selfie. Amelia took it of herself.
(Someone is breathing heavily, but it's unclear whether it's Saskia or Matty.)
Matty: Are you sure you're okay? You've gone a bit pale.
Saskia: Forget it, honestly. Matty, this is important. I need you to be completely truthful with me here. Was it only Amelia in the photo?
(There is another pause. The children are laughing now, but the sound is distorted, punctuated by sharp bursts of white noise.)
Matty: (gasps) Oh my God... you've seen it.
Saskia: No... no... not that photo. At least, I don't know if it's the same, it's just... and I know how crazy this will sound, but a few days ago, I received an email with a photo of Amelia. A selfie.
Matty: What? Then you've seen it... you've seen them. Shit. I can't... I have to go now...
(A quick burst of footsteps and Saskia frantically calling Matty's name).
Matty: No, stop! Get off! You have to leave me alone. This was a mistake. I shouldn't have come. I didn't know...
Saskia: Didn't know what? Matty, what is it? What are you so afraid of?
Matty: (his voice his reduced to a bitter hiss. Almost angry) Afraid? I'm not afraid. I'm bloody terrified. I thought Kinghorne destroyed it. He said he would. He said it couldn't have any power if it was destroyed.
Saskia: Wait, are you saying that Dr. Kinghorne has the same photo?
Matty: He had it. He took it off Amelia after she attacked me. Said it was one of her tricks. Something she cooked up in her darkroom at home to make it look like something was there, standing behind her.
Saskia: But why would she do that? That doesn't make any sense! Matty, I've seen the photo. I've seen what was in that photo. And more importantly, I saw Amelia's face. That look in her eyes. I... I don't think it was a fake.
Matty: Of course it's not fake! I wish you hadn't seen it. God, I wish you hadn't. I'm sorry... I'm so sorry...
Saskia: I don't understand, why are you sorry? Matty, why are you sorry?
Matty: Because you've seen them now. You've seen them.
Saskia: Seen who? I don't understand. I saw that thing... I don't know what it was. It was like seeing a ghost... but it can't be, can it?
Matty: A ghost? You'll wish it was a ghost, trust me. You'll wish that more than anything.
(The audio begins to break up again. The bursts of white noise are louder, longer, punctuated by a whispering noise, as if Saskia and Matty's voices are being muffled by the static.)
Saskia: Matty, please tell me. Please. What was in that photo? What was haunting Amelia?
Matty: You'll never believe me. I told you. People aren't ready to hear it.
Saskia: I'm ready. Okay, Matty? I'm ready. Please tell me. I'm begging you.
Matty: Beg? (His laughter is cold and hard). Get used to that. Get used to begging. You'll beg them every day to leave you be. Not that it'll do you any good. They won't listen. They never listen.
Saskia: Who won't? Who won't listen?
Matty: Them... the....
(The audio breaks down completely, crackling loudly like the static you get when manually tuning in an old radio. There's a long silence, followed by a whisper. The words are not clear, but it sounds like a girl, repeating the same thing over and over.)
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