ENOUGH

Lynus's Point of View

"Lynus apo, y-you came," As soon as I touch her hands, her eyes open, urging a sweet small smile, as I lean down and kiss her forehead. "Hi," I whisper and smile at her.

My heart felt heavy as I stared at her, she lost weight, and she looked pale and weak, "I miss you apo," she whispered and smiled at me, the way she smiled was so genuine.

"How are you feeling?" I ask and caress her hand, she nodded and slowly closed her eyes, "I feel weak apo, I think you are all I need to see before I take my rest," I constantly shake my head and disagree with her. "No, you'll recover," I whisper.

Watching her in this state feels so depressing, "There is no use for me to recover apo if I'm going to end up here again every month, it's tiring apo, I wanna rest."

"No, no, no you're not please no," I begged and kissed the back of her hands, my whole body starting to feel cold, as fear of leaving eats me. She tapped my head using her other hand and fixed some strands of my hair.

"Grandma wants to rest now apo, I'm really tired now," I purse my lips and control my tears, I shake my head and keep kissing her hands. "No, please, stay," I begged.

"My job here is done apo, now you have grown up as a great man, I'm proud of you and I'm contented, now let Grandma rest" she whispers as her voice goes weaker. "I still need you, please stay a little longer," my heart is beating so fast but it makes me even weaker, I'm starting to lose energy.

My tears started falling, and I continuously kiss her hand, "Please stay a little longer, let me be with you a little longer," she smiles at me, "Enough apo, G-grandma already stayed longer than you think so, now let me rest."

"No," she smiled, pulled me up, copped my face, and kissed the tip of my nose just like what she always did when I was young. "Be happy o-ok" she whispers, slowly closing her eyes and starting to breathe heavily.

"No!!!" I whisper in pain and watch her slowly let go of my hand and my mom and dad start crying so loud.

Slowly I was eaten by a loud silence and all I see is my grandma left me.

"Sir," I instantly open my eyes when the Driver speaks, I wipe my tears and sit properly. "Nandito na po tayo sa hospital," I gaze at the window, I'm finally back here in Baguio, when my grandma's funeral ended, I decided to go back because I know, if I stay there a bit longer, I'll just bury myself in pain and longing for her.

The most precious woman in my life, Grandma. "Thank you," I utter, step out of the car, and feel the cold breeze of air here in Baguio. I manage to smile and walk inside the hospital.

"Lynus?!" I glance at my back when Doctor Fhara calls my name, I smile at her, "Fhara how are you?" I asked with a bright smile. "Bakit nandito kana agad? Kala ko ba two months?" she confusedly asked.

"My grandma died as soon as I came back there and the funeral just took three days long, so I came back here," I try to say while smiling but it turns out that it was the painful smile I can show to other people.

"I'm sorry," she said and avoided my gaze, I chuckled, "No, It's fine, by the way how's my patient Tabi? Is she feeling well? Any good results?" I suddenly miss Tabitha, I'll see her after this.

"Ahm---how do I say this, shit," I tilted my head to look at her, as she kept cursing and scratching her hair like she was hesitating on something. "Fhara? What is it?" I ask. She looked at me, took a deep breath, and said, "You know I can't lie to you right?" What does she mean?

"What?"

"Tabitha had a mild stroke a few days ago and the hospital has locked off new blood for her and we admit that we can't do anything about her condition because you are the only person who knows about her state, so they kindly move to Manila for the kid's sake, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Louen beg me not to tell it to you," she said.

Tabitha needs me! "I'm moving to Manila" I utter "What?" Fhara said.

I nodded at her and ran outside the hospital and drove my way back to Manila.

I drive fast, "Why didn't you tell me Louen," I whisper and head straight to Manila.

Louen's Point of View

"Tabi say ah," sambit ko ng subuan ko si Tabitha ng strawberry, "Ahmmm yummy mommy," she cheerfully said while watching TV. wala pa rin hanggang ngayon sila Erille at Six kaya prustas muna ang pinapakain ko kay Tabi dahil hindi ako makabili sa labas dahil hindi ko siya pwedeng iwan.

"Gom se-mari-ga, Han ji-be isseo, Appa gom, omma gom, ae-gi gom, Appa go-meun tung tung hae, omma go-meun nal-shin-hae, Ae-gi go-meun neo-moo ki-yeo-wo, Eu-sseuk, eu-sseuk, jal-han-da," pauit-ulit na yan ang pinapanood ni Tabi sa TV kaya halos masaulado niya na kahit korean language ito.

I continued feeding her until she finished the whole bowl of strawberries, "Ang galing Tabi ah," I said and showed her the empty bowl. She smiles and dances lightly while she keeps singing. I smile at her and head to the sink here in the bathroom to wash the bowl and put it on the table near the TV.

I move my head while the music plays and Tabi keeps singing, I stop when the door opens and, "Lynus?" I utter. "Dada!!!!!"

He quickly walked towards Tabitha and hugged her, "Do you feel any ouchie?" he ask her, bakas sa mukha niya ang puno ng pag aalala.

Pero bakit nandito na siya agd? I thought he would stay there for two months. "I'm sorry Dada wasn't there when you feel ouchiee, don't worry I'll be here now," he whispers and copes Tabi's face and kisses her head.

"Lynus, kailan ka nakabalik?" Tanong ko kaya nakuha ko ang atensyon niya, he looks at me with serious face, straight up "Why didn't you tell me about this Louen?" he calmly asked but I could hear a bit of frustration in his voice.

I let out a deep breath before I a speak, "Ayaw kong masira ng oras na kasama mo ang lola mo kaya hindi ko sinabi," I utter and avoided his gaze, lumapit siya sa akin at hinawakan ang aking kamay.

"You know how much I care about Tabi's condition Louen, you should have told me this because I can do something for Tabi," he seriously said and tightly held my hand, his touch filled with assurance and comfort.

But when I saw pain and sadness in his eyes, I stopped and asked him, "How's your grandmother?" tiningnan niya lang ako at hindi sinagot, tumulo ang luha niya kaya agad ko siyang niyakap.

"She's dead," he weakly whisper, niyakap niya ako ng sobrang higpit at siniksik ang kayang mukha sa aking leeg habang patuloy siyang lumuha.

I rub his back and just let him cry on my arms, "I'm sorry for your loss" I whisper. Tiningnan ko si Tabi habang yakap ko si Lynus at agad kong napansin ang paglaho ng ngiti sa kanyang labi at dahan-dahan niyang hinahawakan ang kanyang ulo.

I slowly push Lynus and look at Tabi, she gazes at me and whispers, "M-mommy ouchiee," at first it was a whisper, and suddenly turned, "Ouchie Mommy!!!" she cried out loud in just one burst.

Mabilis siyang nilapitan ni Lynus, at agad tumawag ng assistance sa nurses. Pagdating ng mga nurse at doctor agad nilang kinuha si Tabitha at nilipat sa E.R. "Lynus!" tawag ko kay Lynus ng papasok na sila sa loob ng E.R.

He looks at me and say, "I will take care for her, trust me," he whisper and the door closes, nanghihina akong napasandal sa pader habang sobrang bilis ng pagtibok ng puso ko.

I stare at the door and whisper, "I trust you."

Erille's Point of View

"Bakit gusto ba kita?" I stopped when he said that, and after a few seconds I smiled. My smile turns into pain and speak, "Edi pupunta ako, wala kang magagawa," sambit ko at nilagpasan siya.

"Hindi ka pupunta Erille!" sambit niya at naramdaman kong hinabol niya ako kaya tumakbo ako, "Erille!" sigaw niya, tumakbo ako ng sobrang bilis pababa ng sagdanan imbis na gumamit ng elevator.

"Erille ano ba, bakit ka tumatakbo?!" rinig kong sambit niya habang patuloy ang paghabol sa akin, nagsimulang tumulo ang luha ko, bakit ba lagi akong talo pagdating sa kanya. "Erille!" he shouted.

I gasp and stop, waiting for him to stand behind me, this is enough! "Erille bakit ka ba biglang tumatak----," I face him grab his shirt and kiss him.

I kiss him with all my heart, I kiss him like this was the last, I reach for him that I never did before. I will tell him because I'm tired of staying underneath these feelings,

I move away and look him in the eyes, "Eril---," I cut him and speak, "Gusto kita! Gusto kita, oo gusto kita kaya sabihin mo sa akin na ayaw mo akong papuntahin dahil gusto mo rin ako! Na gusto mo na rin ako," lahat ng lakas ng loob na inipon ko sa matagal na panahon ay ibinigay ko na ngayon.

Nalalalmbot ang buo kong katawan, hindi ito ang gusto kong mangyari, sabi ko wala na pero ito ako lumuluha sa harapan niya. "Erille," bulong niya sa aking pangalan at tila hindi alam ang isasagot sa tanong ko.

Huminga ako ng malalim bago siya tiningnan ng diretso sa kanyang mga mata at sinabi, "Oo tama ka, gusto kita dati pa at hindi nawala iyon, kahit na pinilit kong tanggalin sa isipan ko na gusto kita hindi ko magawa, kasi tangina Six mahal kita!!" bumuhos lahat ng pilit kong tinatagong emosyon at pagmamahal para sa kanya.

"Mahal kita kaya nagagalit ako sayo, mahal kita kaya sinisigawan kita, mahal kita kaya ginagawa ko ang lahat para kunin ang atensyon mo, kasi laging nakatuon sa malayo yan," tinuro ko ang kanyang mga mata at muling lumuha. "Hindi kasi ako nakikita ng mga yan! Pati nito," I pointed at his chest, "Hindi ako nakikita nito kahit anong gawin ko, kaya nong umalis ka sinubukan kitang kalimutan at kung ano man ang nararamdaman ko sayo, ok na eh pero bigla kang dumating tapos ginulo mo ulit ako, ngayon sabihin mo gusto mo ba ako?" seryoso kong sambit at pinunasan ang aking luha.

"Erille, hindi ko alam," mahina niyang sambit at umiwas sa aking mga tingin, hindi ko napigilang tumawa dahil sa sagot niya. I step backward and continually wipe my tears.

"Hindi ko maintindihan ang nararamdaman ko Erille, hindi ko pa talaga alam, ayaw kong pumunta ka kasi ayaw kong may ibang lalake kang kasama bukod sa akin, ayaw kong may mangyaring masama sayo, nagaalala ako sayo pero hindi ko pa talaga alam kung gusto na ba kita, bigyan mo ako ng ora---," tumawa ako ng napakalakas dahil sa sinabi niya.

"Oras, ano ito exam? Sabihin mo lang sakin kung hindi o oo ang sagot mo Six tapos, tapos na tayo dito," sambit ko at patuloy siyang tiningnan ng mabuti. Hindi siya agad sumagot at tila nahihirapan siyang sagutin ang tanong ko.

"Hindi," he whispered. That's it.

"Ok," I utter and turn my back at him, run away from him. Tumakbo ako ng napakalayo at patuloy na tumutulo ang luha ko. Nagtago ako sa isang malaking puno dito sa park at tunood umupo at pinagpapalo ang aking sarili.

"Ang tanga mo!!! Ang tanga, tanga mo! Ang sakit," naglabas ako ng lahat ng kirot at sakit na aking nararamdaman doon sa lugar na iyon hanggang naisipan kong pumunta ng hospital.

Kung makita ko man siya magpapanggap na lang akong walang nangyari, "Para ho manong," mahina kong sambit at tumuloy na sa loob ng hospital.

While walking through the hall, I keep wiping my tears and force myself to smile, para hindi mapansin nila Louen na umiyak ako, at kung magkita man kami ngayon, kakalimutan ko na lang ang lahat ng nangyari kanina.

Natigilan ako ng makita sa hallway ng hospital na yakap ni Six si Louen ng sobrang higpit, sobrang bigat nito sa aking dibdib, pagkatapos kong sabihin ang nararamdaman ko ganito aabutan ko, "Haha," I laugh silently and slowly took my step backward.

I turn my back at them and walk away slowly, tila bawat hakbang ay katumbas ng unti-unting pagtibok ng aking puso sa sobrang sakit.

"T-talo na naman tayo."

Louen's Point of View

I was shivering my fingernails while staring at the door, my body is buried in fear every time my Tabi is inside this door.

"Si Erille? Louen bakit nandito ka?" Six arrive and seeing him makes me cry, agad akong tumayo at niyakap siya, dahil sa takot. "She's inside that door again," I whisper.

Niyakap niya ako pabalik at hinagod ang aking likuran, "Ok lang si Tabi sa loob, malakas yon eh," he utters and try to cheer me up.

"Ahm dumating na ba si Erille?" he asks, "Hindi pa," sagot ko at hinarap siya, hindi ba magkasama silang umalis? "Magkasama kayo hindi ba?" tanong ko, pero iniwasan niya ang tingin ko at sinabi, "Umalis siya eh, may pinuntahan ata," tugon niya.

I noticed something was off with him, but he tried to cover it with a smile. "Are you ok?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I was about to ask him more but the door opened and Lynus showed up. Agad ko siyang nilapitan.

"She's fine now, don't worry," Lynus said and smiled at me, I hugged him and released the fear that I felt while waiting for him. "It's normal for her to feel pain in her head by this time because we are slowly removing those deformed blood inside her brain, don't worry I will do anything to save Tabitha," he whispered.

He embraces me with the assurance and gentle love he always offers, and by this time I wanna lean on it for now and embrace him back.

We waited to bring Tabi back to her room for an hour, at pagbalik sa room pinagmasdan ko lang siyang payapang natutulog habang may inayos si Lynus sa office ng head doctors.

"Ahmm Louen hindi ka pa ba maghahanda sa pagpasok?" tanong ni Six kaya nilingon ko siya at pati na rin ang orasan. It's already 6pm, I didn't notice it because I was just watching Tabitha the whole time.

Parang ayaw ko na lang pumasok at umalis, gusto ko nalang manatili sa tabi ng anak ko. Pero alam kong paghindi ako pumasok ngayon mahihirapan kami sa susunod na araw dahil ang pera ay mabilis lang maubos. Pag naging kuntento ako baka may mangyaring masama na naman kay Tabi at hindi na ako papayag na maulit ang nangyari nung nakaraan.

I let out a heavy sigh before I kiss Tabi's little hands and let it go, I stand up and get my bag. "Siguradong nandon na si Erille, kaya wag mo na siyang hintayin," hindi ko maintindihan ang pinaparating ng tono ng boses ni Six ngayon, tila parang may hindi tama.

"Ok ka lang?" tanong ko, "Oo naman ok lang ako, sige na pumasok kana wag kang mag-alala ako na ang bahala kay Tabitha," he said and push me through the door.

Lumabas ako ng silid at agad niyang sinara ang pinto kaya inayos ko ang pagkakabuhat ko sa aking bag bago nagsimulang maglakad. "Louen? Where are you going," I was stiff when Lynus appeared. "Lynus," I utter.

"Where are you going?" he repeated, I hold the strap of my bag tighter and "Papasok ako sa trabaho, may trabaho ako ngayon" kinakabahan kong sambit.

"Really? Where let me drive you ther---," I cut him and speak, "No, kaya ko na at isa pa kailangan ka ni Tabitha dito, ikaw muna ang bahala sa kanya" I said and hold his hand.

"Ok fine, just tell me where are you working?" he asked and held both of my hands and wiped the sweat I had on my forehead.

I can't tell him that I'm a stripper, "Ahmm," He smiles and puts all his eyes on me, I can't tell him that I'm dancing and selling my body because I know we will not let him do that, I need to lie.

"I'm working as a waitress in a small restaurant here, night ship," I whisper.

"You don't really need to work Louen, I can pay for the bil---," I cut him and say, "Hindi tama na ang tulong na ibinigay mo sa akin, sobra na iyon, hayaan mo muna akong gumawa ng paraan para sa anak ko Ly," I said.

"Ok, I understand, I just want to tell you that if you get tired, lean on me ok," he whispered and kissed my forehead. "I know," I will but not now. "Thank you, Lynus."

"Always here for you."