Dear You,

I can see how friendly and polite you are when talking to people despite the awful things they've done or said about you but the thing is, although I know for a fact that you'd be nice to me if I approach you, it still feels so damn scary. Why Is that?

You know, I can't stop writing to you. I think this is just how it's supposed to go. I'm supposed to fall head over heels for you while you don't even know or maybe even don't like me. But how do I stop this crazy stupid gesture when a part of me believes that one day you'll realize what this all means and who I am and you end up liking me?

You know, even if you turn out to be disappointed, I won't regret it. I like you a lot and it's crazy but it's true that I know I'd learn from this. Although, I'm not planning to give up easily.

Love.

Your Stranger.

I kept the letters short because I never really know how to write to her knowing that the whole student body reads it along with her. But I don't stop, I can't even phantom the idea. What I was doing felt just right.

I have seen her a lot this week ever since I finally joined the student publication last wednesday. I have to be honest and admit that Aaron and Rachel took a lot of time forcing me into it but when I got to spend a whole afternoon with her during my 'screening test' to see if I fit the criteria to be a writer at the pub, I felt so grateful for my friends and how supportive they are. Just this morning Bobbi texted me and told me I'm in and I wouldn't have done this if it wasn't for my two crazy friends forcing me into it.

And god, I won't even tell you how crazy I got upon recieving the message.. let's just say I got too crazy. Anyway, she asked me to visit the publication office when I have free time so I could be introduced to the members and get used to what a writer does, if it meant getting to see her more then there's no problem with me.

"I hate that guy." Aaron muttered as he sat next to me in our usual lunch table, looking sincerely annoyed. And let me tell you, there's not much that can annoy a popular football player that can have everything he wants.

I whipped my head to the cafeteria doors and found Tyler Reed walking in. Yes, of course, it's natural that all the jocks hates each other. School is like their jungle, the football team, of course, are the lions- they're the kings of this jungle, the wresling team - including team captain Tyler - the apes, the track team are the horses - you get the idea - and the rest of us are the ants.

"He doesn't even talk to you." I pointed out. Although Tyler Reed is, in fact, a much bigger asshole than Aaron is - a much bigger asshole than anyone, really - Aaron's reasons were invalid and I didn't get why he hated him so much.

"Yeah, but he's an ass so I hate him." He replied as if that was all there is to it.

"Because you're all sunshines and daisies, right?" I asked, trying my hardest to be serious about this. His hatred for the guy is still based on irrational reasons even if I've got to admit that Tyler is an ass.

He rolled his eyes at me. "Oh, so you wanna be buddy-buddy with Tyler 'kissass' Reed? Maybe he's the one you want to be best friends with." He said in annoyance as if he sincerely thought I'd prefer "Tyler 'kissass' Reed" over my own best friend.

I rolled my eyes. "Don't turn all sensitive on me you weirdo, I'm just saying.. I don't see much reason for you to hate the guy."

The rest of us have deep reasons to loathe Tyler. After all, he's been an ass to all of us. Meanwhile, Aaron's rich, he's popular, he's rules the school and Tyler can't even mutter a single word against him, there's not much reason for him to hate the guy. 

"Dude?!" He exclaimed as if I'm out of my mind. "Are you freaking serious? Don't you remember? He went after Rachel when he knew I was asking her out."

"I didn't forget, I just don't see how that's a big deal.. Rachel loved you, she ditched Reed and well, you guys are happy so I don't see your point in hating him."

"Whatever, I still hate him." And I knew nothing could've changed his mind.

"Suit yourself." I shrugged and looked at the line at the food counter, deciding that I'm hungry enough to buy from the cafeteria and that the line's short enough for me to wait in. "Imma get me some food." I stated, patting my stomach.

 "Bring me back some fries, will you?" Aaron said, still glaring at Tyler Reed.

I shook my head and headed to the counter, I stood at the back of the line and waited along the normal crowd of Pall Hall. Had it been Aaron buyig the food, he'd have forced the guy at the front to let him cut.

"Oh, hey Jesse." Hannah Glenwood said next to me, occupying the empty space behind me.

I smiled politely. "Hey Hannah, how are things?" We had english together last year and we were on the school play together, she was nice and sarcastic, she made the theatre crew laugh a lot. She's also one of those cool girls who had fame handed to her but was oblivious to it.

If I have to be honest, I had a crush on her for awhile when we were still on the school play together, she was just so cool and funny that you'd fall for her humor. I didn't like her as much as Bobbi though, so I decided to just admire her and leave it at that.

She shrugged. "You know, fighting off assholes here and there, how about you?"

I laughed slyly. Hannah dated one of the -unfortunately many - school assholes, Clinton, and he's been bugging her ever since they broke up. The guy's as stupid as it gets, that's all I know.

"Well, I'm joining the school publication.. trying to do something extra, things are getting boring."

"Oh, that's cool! I've always wanted to try that out!"

"What stopped you?"

She shrugged. "I hate writing."

I laughed again. What did I say? Cool girl. I kinda miss being on the play with her, she was always funny during practice. I took my tray after paying the cashier and smiled at her. "I'll see you around."

"You too."

There weren't anything good to eat so I ended up just  buying a juice for myself and Aaron's fries.

I sat on our table and tried my best to ignore Aaron's stupid grin after I gave him his fries. I couldn't try hard enough, apparently, since I ended up looking at him. "What?"

"How about you ask her out?"

I frowned. "Ask who out?"

"Hannah, bro."

"Can you please stop with that? Stop trying to say I can go out with every girl I talk to, it's making me nuts."

"What? You guys were talking and I saw chemistry -"

"You saw chemistry with who?" Jensen Eigelmann asked, sitting next to Aaron.

"Hannah and Jesse."

"Hannah Glenwood?" Jensen asked retorically before laughing his ass off. "Dude's gotta be crazy before going after that chick. Who'd want that ass Clinton tailing your girl every single second and have you seen that motorcycle guy waiting outside every dismissal?" I wasn't going to answer but he turned out to be waiting for one so I said yes and then he continued. "My girl said he's some sort of richass son of a senator and he's also like a huge supermodel or something and the dude's going out with Hannah, that's a lot to compete with, I suggest you find another girl if you don't wanna be sorry in the end."

 I frowned at him - how did the guy even know all that? - but Aaron laughed at him. "Since when have you turned girl and learned about gossiping?"

Jensen rolled his eyes. "Asshole."

But Aaron just kept laughing. I decided to start drinking my juice then, I had a free period after lunch and decided to stop by the pub office but for now I'm just gonna enjoy my orange juice and head there later. Aaron took a piece of french fry and looked at me. "Seriously bro, you gotta eat lunch if you don't want your mom worrying about every little thing."

"Don't worry about me, I'm not hungry."

He shrugged. "Whatever you say." and then he started munching on his fries. Disgusting weirdo jock.

After lunch I went straight to the office, it was near the school entrance which is why you could see people lining up there all the time. From what I've noticed, they usually stop after a few days and start again after an article comes out.

I knocked although it's open, just to see if Bobbi would look. She did and I swear my heart stopped for a second. She smiled at me and gestured me to come in. "Guys, we have a new member.. Jesse Watcherson."

There were only a few people in there, not many people have free periods after lunch. On a side note, everyone who was there welcomed me and then went back to their work.

I looked at Bobbi when I was done being welcomed and waited for her to make me do something. She began talking when she noticed my expectant expression, "Well, our adviser doesn't come here a lot so I'm in charge but you can ask anybody for questions. " I nodded because I honestly couldn't speak. How do you speak to a girl as breathtaking as her? "I'm halfway through proofreading next week's paper, but there's still a lot to do.. if you have time you can help me."

I nodded and smiled.

Speak, you stupid idiot.

"Alright, this pile has all the finished edits - " She pointed at a thick pile of papers on the left then afterwards pointed at the the lesser pile on the right. "And these ones are the ones I haven't touched yet. These are the proofreading symbols.." she handed me a piece of paper with a bunch of weird symbols in it, I remembered some of it from english class. "It's a guide on proper editing - so - dig in."

I sat right next to her during the entire time, as in right next to her, and my heartbeat never slowed down. I was in the middle of panic mode and happy mode, it was crazy. I almost had a hard time proofreading, if I didn't want to impress her I would've just died there instantly. By doing all the things she made me do, I also sort of understand now why she's never really roaming around school. This was a tough work and I don't think she's even getting paid.

So.. um.. Bobbi..? How long have you been a part the school publication..? Crap. I haven't even said it but I already know it's gonna end up being a boring conversation and things are gonna escalate from there. How do I speak to her? Should I?

Before I could decide though, the guy Eric came in, the guy's starting to get under my nerves.. for no reason at all. Maybe it's because I feel like he has a thing for Bobbi, I don't know but I just don't like him.

"Heyyo, peeps." He greeted and focused directly on Bobbi. He didn't even seem to notice me. "Hey Bobbi, I was thinking.. maybe we could go out this Saturday as a celebration for my getting into the team."

Bobbi looked up awkwardly from what she was doing and gulped. "Uh.. sorry Aldrin, I'm busy this weekend."

Aldrin?

"Oh that's cool, maybe some other time then.." And then finally he noticed me - and frowned. "Jesse Watcherson..? What are you doing here?" And then he smiled - as if we were the closest friends on earth.

I thought his name was Eric!

"He joined the publication." Bobbi informed before going back to what she was doing.

Who the hell is Eric then?

"Really? The student publication? Of all the people I expected to try out for football it was you. You didn't want to play football?"

Who am I asking? I was the one who assumed it's the guy's name.

"Oh no. I'm not into hurting myself just to win a trophy I won't even be able to bring home."

I heard Bobbi snort and honestly, I felt proud of myself for amusing her.

Holy crap, his name's not Eric? He looked like an Eric..

"Oh." He replied before nodding and awkward goodbye.

I continued what I was doing and just tried my best to get through this without any more awkward situations. I took a peek at her every once in awhile though, just to make sure she's real and just to see that she's still there.

Once she caught me looking at her so I had to pretend I didn't understand how to use a symbol for editing. She explained it to me and I didn't risk any more stares after that. 

It definitely ended up as one of my favorite days though.