A Bit About the Author:

authorhlumelo is a four-time featured Wattpad writer who won the first Open Novella Contest and was also shortlisted on the Wattys2018. This aspiring writer lives in South Africa and enjoys dabbling in fantasy and African folklore. 

Title:

Stupid-me first read it as "Quran" for some strange reason. Anyway, while it contains a very unusual hard-to-pronounce-at-first word in it, it's a unique title that stands apart from the crowd so to speak. 

Cover:

In a word, simple. The text has a nice layering when you look closely, but it's not a very enticing cover. It's good and fits the book, but not especially a very captivating one. 

Blurb:

Excellent blurb. It's rare that I find a blurb that satisfies me, and this one is it. Perfect length and just the amount of information given so it's not an info-dump but still excites the reader into taking a closer look. Good job!

The Good:

I haven't read much of African literature outside of school reading to be a good judge of this, so all I say below please take with a grain of salt. 

Overall, you have a great story going on. The depth is remarkable, especially for Wattpad books. It's rare that I find one that has this much character and many facets as any classic in a library. The story-line is a great one and it's nice to be able to get a peek into the past, no matter how fantasized it might be. 

The Bad: 

The grammar for the most part was good, but there were a few places where the commas were unnecessary. 

Prose. It's rare that I find someone that even attempts the old style of prose (and I commend on you this one. It's not done often enough anymore.) And in some places, especially the ending, were very beautiful and a joy to read. However... There were plenty of places where it was too much, almost to the point of being tedious to read--even for me. Try to simple it in those places so it's not so "purple prosey" and it's actually decently done. The story was often confusing to follow as a result because the wording was confusing. 

Characters. Last point here--I hope. And this is in part to your prose. The characters needed more depth. I know that this is an oral work put to paper, in a manner of speaking, but I still think it could do with more so it's easier to keep straight who is who. Many times I had to stop and reread sections to remember who was who. (Might be the names, I don't know.) 

Last point, I promise this time. Plot. This follows what I said above. Watch the prose. The plot sometimes was confusing as a result because your intentions of what was happening was unclear. That style of prose is nice, but it needs to be worked on in my opinion so that the book is clear to read. 

What the Reader Thought: 

This is a bit out of what I usually read as far as style goes, but I enjoyed it. Besides what I talked about above, you have great stuff going on in your story and I wish you all the best in the Open Novella Contest. I liked the story overall and the ending, especially, was very well done. 

Just watch the prose and the pacing, and it'll be great. 

Score: 6.5/10