"It's a funny story . . ." Lily said nervously. 

"It could be a comedy show," Marco added. 

"Shit shows make humor," James Sirius nodded. "The chaos will definitely make it in the comedy department."

"Is that even a thing?" Ruby turned to her brother. "Like what the fuck is a 'comedy department'?"

"Like what type of show it is . . ."

"You mean genre?" Roxanne asked incredulously. 

"As interesting as this is-" 

"Which it's not," Marlene interrupted her girlfriend. 

"What the bloody hell happens?" Dorcas continued, ignoring Marlene. To which the blonde simply rolled her light blue eyes. 

"Mum gets a dragon," Lily stated as she pulled out a golden locket. 

"Oo!" Rose exclaimed, catching onto what Lily was doing. "I want to see it!"

"I've already-" Ruby elbowed Scorpius, stopping him from saying anything. 

"What do you mean by 'you are all dead'?" Remus repeated as he narrowed his eyes. 

"That's scary," James Sirius whispered as he began to lean back. "He looks just like mum when he does that."

"Funny how genetics work," Elyse scoffed sassily. "Don't ya think?"

Jade laughed openly. 

"Yeah so I'm going to examine the time turner," Rose stated as she stepped back. "You guys can handle . . .that."

"Um . . ." James Sirius began slowly. 

"Well . . ." Roxanne trailed off. 

"Ice cream!" Hugo shouted nervously. 

"It happened . . . " Marco trailed off. 

"Halloween . . ." Elyse stammered. 

"Oh for Merlin's sake!" Jade groaned frustratedly as she stepped forward. "My father, Harry, was being targetted by Voldemort because of a damn prophecy. Lily and James were forced into hiding with baby Harry. Halloween 1981, their Secret Keeper, the rat-" she pointed to the lump on the floor. "-told Voldemort where you were hiding. Lily and James were murdered leaving baby Harry an orphan with Moldy gone or the time being. 

"Sirius was the one who found them along with a breathing baby Harry and Nova," Jade stated bluntly. "Hagrid took my dad to the Dursleys where he was neglected. Mum went to an orphanage. Dumbledick erased Remus's memory of his daughter. Sirius went to Azkaban for supposedly killing Peter and selling the Potters out. 

"Remus was left alone for twelve years. Marlene and Dorcas die shortly after leaving Hogwarts. Alice and Frank are tortured to insanity by Bellatrix. Don't worry, Uncle Nev gets revenge and kills the bitch in the final battle. Anyways, in Mum and Dad's third year, Remus becomes the DADA teacher and Sirius breaks out of Azkaban.

"Mum, Dad, Aunt 'Mione, and Uncle Ron spend the whole year thinking Sirius is out to kill Harry. After exams, Sirius drags Uncle Ron into the Whopping Willow where the others follow. After a dramatic story time, some arguments, a knocked-out Snape, and Mum almost murdering her fathers, they got the truth." Jade explained. "Then Sirius was captured after Remus turned because he is a fluffy little puppy. 

"Mum, Dad, and Aunt 'Mione go back in time three hours to save Sirius and a hippogriff. Then Sirius was on the run until 1996 when he died." she was nothing less than blunt. "Voldemort returned to power at the end of Mum and Dad's fourth year. Late June of 1995. The world thought Mum and Dad were attention-seeking liars. The Order of the Pheonix was reformed. Mum became the youngest member, demanding she be in it. Then Sirius dies."

"That was blunt," Regulus remarked. 

"Really?" Remus turned to him with a sarcastic look. "I didn't notice."

"She definitely could've worded that better," Tonks nodded.

"Good job, Jade," Marco nodded firmly. 

"Thanks, Buzz Buzz."

"And Remus dies during the final battle," Freddie remarked. "Jade forgot that one."

"So we all die or go insane?" Alice asked deadpan. 

"Escentially," Roxanne nodded. "Oi! Rosie! How's the time turner going?"

"I'm still working on it!" the redhead called back. "I already found a minor thing to fix. I'm not sure what else. Find something to do in the meantime."

Jade nodded and marched forward. She grabbed the Firewhiskey from a shocked James Senior and started chugging it. 

"That's not what I meant . . ." Rose rolled her blue eyes. 

"Then you should have clarified," Elyse stated as she took the bottle from Jade. 

"So let me get this straight-" Sirius began as Elyse took a wild sip of alcohol. 

"You're not," Ruby joked. 

"I'm not." Jade added. 

"That's besides the point," Remus stated. 

"You children travel back in time, tell us we are going to meet a horrible fate, and drink our alcohol?" Marlene pipped up. 

"Did you want us to save you some?" Marco raised a brow as he passed the bottle he drank out of to James Sirius. 

"That's unsanitary," Dorcas stated with her face scrunched up as James drank from the cup. 

"Like you didn't eat Marlene's-"

Marco placed a hand over Jade's mouth. 

Elyse snorted. 

"Did you just lick my hand?" Marco demanded as he withdrew his hand from her mouth. 

"Well I couldn't ask you to remove your hand. You wouldn't let me talk."

"Ew! Come on, man," James groaned as Marco whipped his hand on James's shirt. 

"Your sister. You deal with her saliva."

"Hold on!" James Senior spoke. "My son marries their daughter?"

Ruby gave her grandfather a sarcastic look. It was scarily similar to the look Remus would give him when asking if he were that stupid.

"Yes," James Sirius nodded as he pulled his phone out. "I have pictures."

The Marauders and Co. gathered around as James Sirius presented the photos. 

The first picture was clearly of Remus and Sirius, but older in age. However, standing between them was a beautiful girl. She wore a black leather jacket and converses. Her caramel hair fell around her shoulders. The black smirk that was upon her face faded into a large grin. 

"This is the last picture Mum has with her dads," Jade explained. 

The next wizarding picture on the phone displayed the girl from the picture before but she was with a boy. He stood a few inches taller and had an uncanny resemblance to James Potter but with green eyes; Lily's eyes. The girl had a smirk tugging as her lips before shoving the boy. The boy stumbled before throwing her over his shoulder and jumping around. 

"That was before they were thrown into the fighting and the midst of the war," Ruby explained. "This was before-" 

"What?"

"Nevermind. Don't worry about it," she shook her head. 

The next photo was not only darker but it was a drawing. The girl was visibly injured. She had blood running from her head with a busted lip. A boulder flew from no where, knocking a figure to the ground. 

"This is a picture Uncle Dean drew," Roxanne explained. "It's when Aunt Nova damn near won a duel against Voldemort."

The next photo showed the girl in a beautiful white dress as she stood beside the boy. Large and happy smiles were upon their faces. 

"MY SON MARRIES BABY MOONFOOT!" James Senior explained happily. 

Sobs were heard. 

Everyone turned to see Remus Lupin in tears. 

"What are you looking at?" he demanded aggressively. "I'm not crying! You are!"

"I'VE GOT IT!" Rose exclaimed. "We can go home."