Tonks' POV

Christmas ended, I received a bunch of presents, Arthur recovered and people were getting back to their usual bitter humor. Completely opposite to the rest, I started being some kind of happy rainbow floating above everyone's heads. Somehow the holidays had made me even happier than ever. Which really annoyed Sirius and Moody and Kingsley and, for some unexplainable reason, Remus.

Because of celebrations and all that stuff my mission with Remus was moved to another day. I know that missions are supposed to be scary and are supposed to be taken seriously but in my case I wasn't scared at all.

I felt I was going insane. Everyone was depressed and I was happy. Everyone hoped to die and I was smiling at sad people in the streets. Maybe it was because of the excitement. I was looking forward to  spend some quality time with Remus. I hadn't seen Remus for quite a long time and I was seeing him that day so...

Maybe I could ask him what had happened to him? Maybe he was going through a rough werewolf-related time... Maybe he didn't turn into a wolf the other month and he had some angry-beast inside of him that hadn't been released... And now he was letting his temper go as a human.

I was really confused.

I mean, I can understand menstrual cycles but "werewolf cycles" are something else.

I stepped slowly out of my house looking around to make sure there was nobody suspicious near. I felt water drizzling above my head. I looked upwards and saw a sad grey sky. I smiled feeling the rain pouring on me.

I walked to a dark corner near my house and apparated.

***

I appeared next to Remus's house. It was a really old and shabby cottage that seemed about to fall apart. I skipped to the door an nearly tripped, I knocked the door. I kept knocking but nobody answered. In that moment I realized the door was actually open. I placed my fingers on it pushed softly.

The passage was dark and as soon as you entered you could have this odd sensation you have when a room has been closed and with no ventilation for a long time.

"Remus?"

I heard a loud crash on the other side of the passaged.

"Remus?" I asked a bit louder this time.

I heard something collide with a wall. I felt rubble and dust falling from the ceiling. A growl came from the same place the other noises came from.

"Remus!" I cried as I saw my best friend, who had just appeared from behind the door at the end of the passage, end up on the floor. I ran to help him get up.

"I thought I was the clumsy one! Why do people like stealing my role?" I joked as I helped the fellow werewolf get back to his feet.

I was about to mock about his scruffy look and lost gaze but then my eyes landed on his. Something had happened to him. Anything. He just wasn't okay.

"Are you okay? If you feel bad maybe you can just skip the mission... I'll do your part of the work" I said as he leaned against the wall.

"No! I'm fine!" He spoke finally. Maybe I was wrong but I could feel the smell of alcohol in his breath.

"Are you sure? Maybe you should stay" I added putting an arm around his shoulder ready to take him to the nearest chair or sofa or bed.

"I'm completely sure!" He nearly yelled pushing my arm away from his body and started walking awkwardly towards the front door.

I know I should have stopped him. I know I should have used some spell on him and taken back to his bed. But I couldn't.

I wasn't going to fight Remus.

I wasn't going to fight drunk Remus.

I was such a coward.

***

The way was hard but we both managed to get to the place where the Death Eaters were meeting. It was the house of one of them.

I must said, they did a pretty good job at making the house look ordinary. You couldn't have told actual wizards, actual dark wizards, were having a meeting there.

Remus and I knelt next to the window, covered by the invisibility cloak I had brought with me.

I could barely hear anything and I can't assure you the shadows behind the curtain were all human.

I glanced at Remus. He was concentrated on staring straight to the front.

"So... Remus..." I started trying to start a conversation. I was completely sure the Death Eaters wouldn't hear us, also that we wouldn't gat any good information from that meeting. "Did you... Like your gift?"

"Yes" he answered coldly and unconvinced still keeping his eyes on the window.

"I hope this doesn't bother you but... I checked your gift before giving it to you and... well... saw all the pictures..." Remus didn't answer so I just kept talking. "You've all changed so much" I added giggling. "You were such a cutie and Sirius was... well... woah"

It was weird to comment something like that about my own cousin but it was true. When he was young he was just... woah.

For the first time in the whole night I felt Remus looking at me.

"But... I should admit... he's still handsome, isn't he? Even after Azkaban..."

"So you've fallen for him them? He always gets the women" he growled with a jealousy in his voice.

Wait.

Did he think I was in love with Sirius?!

Everything suddenly made sense. His sudden hate on Sirius. His bitter attitude. Everything.

I had no time to think. Anger got inside of me and took control of all my senses.

How could he think that?!

All that time I had been trying to express my love for him and-

"You'd know perfectly well who I'd fallen for if you weren't to busy feeling sorry for yourself to notice" I spat without thinking.

Remus' eyes opened widely but he didn't answer, he was probably processing what I had just said. I stared at him trying to show all my anger only with my expression.

I stood up fiercely and he did the same but slowly, not taking his eyes away from mine, his mouth half opened.

I was waiting to him to act, to answer, to hold me between his arms and kiss me like in the movies but he did nothing. He stared at me confused, I stared at him with fury.

"Dora, I-"

I heard a cry from inside the house, Remus heard it too because he jumped like me and looked to the window. Some shadows were approaching to it. We heard voice coming from inside louder than ever. I looked down next to us, the invisibility cloak was laying on the ground. The Death Eaters had seen us.

"Bloody he-" But I couldn't finish the phrase. A green light came from inside of the house and broke the glass of the window.

Remus grabbed my hand and we ran.

When we were far away from the house we stopped to breath. Remus kicked a bench next to a park and then sat on it.

I wanted him to say something! To speak to me!

I had just-

Remus apparated, leaving me alone in the middle of a street I didn't know.

***

Remus' POV

The werewolf landed just in front of the door of his house. Exhausted and breathing heavily, Remus managed to enter his house. He went through the passage and got into the room.

Everything was exactly as what it had been before he left. Empty bottles laid everywhere on the floor around the tattered sofa that stood in the dark room.

Remus took a new bottle of cheap fire whiskey and opened it. He curled on the sofa and started drinking directly from the bottle, slapping strongly his forehead every time he stopped drinking.

He finally stood up and, with the bottle still in his left hand, went to the nearest wall and started kicking it. He didn't stop until he no longer felt his foot. The. He went back to the sofa.

He emptied the bottle and decided to leave it next to the sofa, next to the others. He was about to stand up to get another but he realized where he had put the bottle on. It was the gift, the gift Tonks had given to him. It was the still wrapped box, because he hadn't opened it yet, laying under his already empty bottle.

He took the box carefully a d unwrapped it. Inside of it he found a book. It had a hard brown cover. Remus opened the book and started going through its pages. Pictures of him and the Marauders during his school years were everywhere. Sometimes a pink haired baby got into the pictures. James, Peter, Sirius, Tonks and himself waved at Remus smiling.

He didn't know how to feel.

Tonks and Sirius had done that for him.

All that time they spent together, all those secrets, were because they wanted to give him a nice gift for Christmas.

The werewolf suddenly felt like ripping every single page from the album. His eyes got more watery every photo he saw. That continued until he reached the last page. It was blank except for a tiny note written with green ink on the corner of the page. It read:

It may not be the the most expensive gift ever but I this brights your day.
Merry Christmas!
With love,
Tonks (not Nymphadora)

Remus could't handle it anymore, he threw the album across the room.

All that time it had been clear.

She loved him.

_______________________
GUYS IT'S BEEN SUCH A LONG TIME I FEEL LIKE THE WORST PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE!!!

I'm so sorry!!

I had this awful lack of inspiration and I couldn't find the right words to write this.

I hope you you liked it (and I hope you forgive me)

Byeeee

:)