The vaccines are kinda, pretty much, out there now.

But, then again, so is that virus. In countries like India (where I'm writing this from), cases are soaring, breaking yesterday's record with exponential ease, whereas in countries like the UK, where the vaccination program is well underway for almost all age groups, cases are falling - and in Taiwan (that's in the Eastern Pacific), life is back to a new, better normal.

For most of us here - teenagers stuck in countries where the pandemic is raging, life isn't exactly that easy. Online school (ugh), exams (double ugh) and a lack of support. I mean, it's a bit easy to keep on going on and on about how life just sucks right now.

But, then again, there are ways to make it better. That's what I want to talk about today. Writing this on the night of the 29th of May, I feel a bit silly about how personal the rest of this blog is going to be, but it's the best I can do - and I do hope reading about my case helps you cope during this.

At the beginning of the pandemic, I did okay; I paid attention in school, got great grades, kept up my social life. One month in . . . not that great. I became miserable and sick of everything. No one really noticed, and I lost touch with everyone but . . . no one.

I tried to find a way to alleviate my misery and rediscovered my Wattpad account almost a year back, in June. Cue the formation of Maxxie, a silent reader happily reading cheesy romances and fast-paced action novels.

And then, in August, someone followed me. I don't know how they found my account, but (woah!) they did. I don't know how that little notification did it, but it pushed me to write and put up my first book.

From there onwards, I started socialising more. I made a Discord account, joined communities, chatted. I became happier. I went through several phases: the obsessed-with-romance phase, the sick-of-romance-and-in-love-with-action phase, the I-hate-reading-OMFG phase, the I'm-really-very-sad phase and so many more. (And I'm still going more.)

The nice ones were fun, and the sad ones?—they were easier to bear because even though no one, online or offline, really knew what I was going through, they helped me. They told me silly jokes, gave me stuff to do, didn't ignore me and could relate to whatever I got the guts to share.

So, that's what this blog is all about: finding someone to share yourself with. There's always someone to reach out to once you go around a bit. It becomes easier to live once you get something that's bothering you off your chest. I'm speaking personally. The first time I tried doing so wasn't long back. I shared my worst with someone I trusted and was comfortable around - someone I felt would not judge me for being the way I was about certain things.

But, of course, it isn't easy to share stuff you really feel, deep, with people - especially if you're someone like me, who has never done that before and is too freakin' scared about what would happen. Would my friendship break? Would they feel weird around me? That's what I worried about, and it wasn't helped by the fact that someone I knew would backtalk a lot. They used to tell me what they hated about other people - and I often wondered if they were doing the same about me.

Sharing is a leap of faith. It's deciding you trust the other person to see all sides of you and be there with you. It can start off by asking someone a simple, how are you?— to something like, 'Hey, I'm not feeling that great. Is it okay if I get it off me here, by talking to you?'

That's how I began to share, and it's made me feel happier, better. You can let it out to anyone - an offline friend or family member, someone online - anyone. Really.

Okay, now this entire thing was cheesy and over-philosofical. And I'm sleepy. I really hope this helped, in whatever way it could.

XOXO,
Maxxie [ queenieexxx ]
P.S: Stay safe, take care, and keep a smile :D