DEREK SHOULD GO TO HELL.

Or somewhere deeper and more torturous, where he'll never see the light of day. As I walk to Home Ec. — where my last period and last persuasion of the day awaits — I can't help but think that Drew is utterly crazy. His middle school friends don't exist anymore. In the case of Derek, who has lifeless eyes and certainly no soul, I can't imagine a nice guy ever existed in his body.

Part of me acknowledges the game we played, the battle we fought. I sat down in front of him, kept him from going to Madison's aid, and dragged one of his worst secrets to the light of day: that he can't walk away from someone who controls him. One might say he did the same in return — he just did it better. Precisely, mercilessly and so effectively that I'm shivering still, as I walk to my next class.

Madison and Leah never returned to Music. I'll have to hear tomorrow from her, and the rest of them, what happened with their conversations.

Throughout the start of Home Ec. I couldn't bring myself to approach Terrence. But I've run out of excuses, having gotten to the stage of sewing the pieces of my shirt together. Terrence is sitting at one of the sewing machines already, his hands deftly threading material under the needle with rote precision. He's a quick study, I note.

When he hears my footsteps, Terrence looks up at me. A mischievous smirk breaks out on his face when I take the machine next to him, instead of the vacant one at the far end of the workbench. "Well, well, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

I used to think he was irritatingly flamboyant and cheesy. But after my harrowing encounter with Derek, whose thoughts are locked behind a reinforced vault of apathy, Terrence feels like a ray of sunshine.

I hesitate to speak, worried that Terrence might've found out about our strange behaviour through one of his friends. Drew spoke to Reece this morning, and Delaney shares an Economics class with Brittany. If they all did what we planned yesterday, all the other four Monarchs have been confronted. Will Terrence have been warned already?

"How has your day been?" I wonder curiously, watching his face carefully.

"Why do you want to know?"

"I, um, needed a way to ease into the conversation, don't you think?"

"And here I thought we'd have moved past bland conversation starters by now. You could have said, I want you, Terrence, right here, right now—" His husky, exaggerated voice lightens considerably, "—and I would have considered that a better opening line."

My jaw drops, neck and ears flushing pink. I can't even respond to that. Terrence stares wickedly at me, and I narrow my eyes. "Of course you would. Egomaniac."

He shrugs. "I'm just being honest."

It seems like he hasn't been warned. Thank God. We all noticed as of late that the Monarchy hasn't been hanging out together outside of class — neither in the cafeteria nor the courtyard before and after school — so perhaps their disconnect is still working in our favour. "Hm. Are you always honest with me?"

"As much as I can be."

"Then can I ask what you think about the Monarchy?"

Terrence seems lost for words, and his feeble attempt at deflection comes out in strings of nervous stutters. "Uh, w-well. I guess so. Why do you need to know?" I realise I spoke to Reece and Derek about being blackmailed before I spoke to Terrence. We've never had such a serious conversation before.

"I'm trying to figure out your intentions."

"My intentions?"

Terrence is smart in his own crafty, resourceful way, but I'm better at psychological warfare — clearly not better than Derek fucking Hale, but that's a problem to be remedied later. Inching closer to him, I lean my hands on the counter lightly. He watches warily, eyes scanning all over my face, gradually realising that I came for more than a catchup on each other's lives.

"Drew sent me to find out what's keeping you in the Monarchy." That's a half-truth, but it's close enough to the truth that my face remains calm and casual as I say it. Drew sent me, but not for recon.

The little gears in his head start turning, and his eyes narrow and darken. Terrence scrutinises my face, trying to decide if what I said was true, but I don't show a trace of emotion. It seems he can't figure it out, so he opts to play dumb. His face displays the perfect amount of innocence and confusion, eyebrows knitted together and eyes crinkled. "Drew? Do I know this person?"

The poster boy for cluelessness, except he sure as hell knows who Drew is. "You know Drew as well as I do, maybe even better. In fact, I bet that you guys have a past with him, one that you want to avoid talking about. And you said you try to be as honest as you can with me."

Saying that is a feat in itself because I feel like someone is softly wringing my throat. Usually, I wouldn't use whatever remnants of our fledgling friendship are left in Terrence's heart against him, but the clock is ticking, the class is nearly ending and I'm nearly at the end of my fabric.

Terrence blinks twice. A beat of silence passes, and I swallow my guilt and discomfort. "My day was boring until you showed up. I think the Monarchy is the worst thing to have happened to me. My intentions are to protect myself, and I can't tell you what's keeping me in the Monarchy." He stares at me, waiting expectantly for a response. The look on his face is hopeful yet afraid like he's just placed the entirety of his heart into my palm for weighing. In a way, I guess he did.

I breathe slowly while my brain catches up. He answered all my questions in the order I asked them. How was his day? What do you think of the Monarchy? What are your intentions? What keeps you here? "Why can't you tell me?"

"Because then I wouldn't be protecting myself. Counterintuitive."

Not good enough. I need answers, now, preferably. "Elaborate."

Somewhere in the back of my mind, it occurs to me that Terrence could be expertly lying to me and every word out of his mouth is just to lead me astray. Then I remember him unlocking the projector booth door for me, and giving Kyler time to save the newspaper money. In daily appearances, he might be a Monarch through and through: cruel, uncaring, and selfish. But every time it's come down to the wire, every time I've needed him to do the right thing, he's done it.

I hope Terence can hear the desperation in my voice, though I'm trying to seem empowered. I hope he helps me out, however unlikely that may be. I hope— God, I hope I don't hurt him.

"Let me put it this way," he says, while neatly snipping a few stray threads from his shirt. "Say that a queen rules a kingdom. That kingdom is very hard to control, the work is dangerous and many people want her head on a pike. She needs help. So she brings in some guard dogs, you know, to help with the workload." My eyes roll at his futile attempt to create a seemingly innocent metaphor to describe us. Brittany, queen. Monarchy, guard dogs. Easy. "But the guard dogs are powerful too. And if the queen isn't careful, they'll turn on her because they never wanted to help her in the first place. So then what does she do?"

I stare at him, failing to see what his point is. "Get a leash?"

"That's exactly what she did," Terrence nods. "Now all you have to do is get the fucking leash off."

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

We're sharing war stories over trays of ham and cheese sandwiches.

The first war story is, naturally, what happened with Benjamin's competition yesterday. Benjamin and his team placed first at their qualifying Mathletes competition. He's very happy about it, but I don't think the trophy means as much to him as the fact that he is going to the third round. After all, his ultimate goal is the championship weekend in New York.

Then Delaney tells us what she had said to Brittany when they were in Economics. I was surprised they hadn't been given detention — or sent to the principal's office — if everything was as vicious as Delaney said it was. Some students were starting to hide in case the two girls started slapping or throwing things at each other, and Delaney recounted this with a wickedly satisfied glint in her eye. I'm trusting that she didn't do anything to put anyone in danger.

Everyone else's attempts at persuading the Monarchy seemed to be similar. Derek and I were practically torturing each other emotionally, and Leah says she and Madison did not fare much better. An exchange of scathing words, sharpened to a dagger-point, heated to a white-hot glow: that's what occurred with all of us.

Benjamin has been apologising profusely to me for leaving me to deal with Derek. "It's fine," I say, for the umpteenth time. Each time he refuses to accept my acceptance of his apology, it grinds my nerves down even more.

I left out all the details of the bloody mind game Derek and I played, so no-one has any reason to specifically worry about me. I included salient notes — like Derek leaving Drew of his own volition, only to be blackmailed by Brittany some time afterward.

If Drew was hoping for vindication, evidence that his friends didn't leave him of their own accord, he's disappointed. Something tells me his conversation with Reece did not go the way he hoped, either. He's markedly quieter than he was yesterday.

Delaney leans forward on crossed arms, poking at her fries. "What happened with Terrence?"

"He made up this stupid analogy, saying that the Monarchs are basically Brittany's dogs. He said he'd leave the Monarchy, but Brittany has something she is controlling him with. Whatever it is."

"So, blackmail. We already knew that."

I nod, chewing on my sandwich. My conversation with Terrence was significant. Not because I discovered anything new, but I finally discovered something through the right channels. We only know about the blackmail because I eavesdropped on Reece and Terrence two months ago, and the guilt of unearthing a secret like that has been eating at me since.

But to have Terrence tell me outright — well, through a thin metaphor — makes me feel... on the right path. My heart twists in my chest thinking of him.

All you have to do is get the fucking leash off.

"Do..." My fingers are tapping on my knee. An idea blossoms. "—do you think Terrence wants our help?"

"What would he need our help for?" Benjamin shrewdly asks.

It's all so confusing, and everyone feels this way. I see furrowed brows and narrowed eyes on all the faces of my friends. There's really not much more to be said. However, there is a lot to think about. I finish off my sandwich, pondering my talk with Terrence.

"The same thing we're fighting for, I guess. The end of the Monarchy." Delaney scoffs at the proposition, and Leah looks equally incredulous. However, Drew is curious and seems to want to know more. "Think about it. Who would like being blackmailed into doing things that make the whole school hate you? If what Drew told us was accurate, Reece and Derek's last friendship with someone outside of the Monarchy was in middle school. I don't know what Terrence and Madison's history is, but it can't be much better."

We don't get to pick who we play.

"I get that your talks with Derek and Terrence were far less hostile than ours," Delaney analytically points out. That makes me laugh inside, thinking Derek's words were less hostile than what Brittany and Delaney said to each other. "But it doesn't mean they want out of the Monarchy, or our help to do it."

"And what about the others?" Leah adds. "We don't know anything about Madison, other than what she chooses to post. We don't know if it's just some being blackmailed, or all of them. So if we go trying to help one, we could pick the wrong person."

"Surely our job is easier if someone on the enemy's team has the same goal as us."

"I'm not sure about that." My head whips to Drew, shocked at his words. He was the one who wanted this in the first place! He shrugs at the disbelief on my face. "All it does is make us sympathise with them. I would know. I mean, I only suggested the persuasions in hopes of seeing a flicker of goodness in my ex-friends." His talk with Reece must have gone really badly then.

Drew continues, "You're already going easy on Terrence, but if it comes down to defending Brittany or himself, I'm sure he will follow her. They can't do anything against Brittany's wishes, if the blackmail theory is even true. Terrence could have lied to you."

"I'm not going easy on Terrence. If I have to play the friend in order to get information, then I'm going to play the friend," I argue briskly, breathing through the hot poker of guilt that stabs my heart. "And why wouldn't the blackmail theory be true? I'm not saying it is, but we shouldn't discount it so soon."

Drew's eyes harden on me, but not before I see a glimpse of pain. "You have only been here for a year. If you'd have seen all the bullshit the Monarchy has pulled over the years, you'd certainly wonder what is important enough to be worth the things they've done. Because I am doubting that those teenagers have secrets so phenomenal, they'd ruin lives to hide them."

I think he's really wondering what could be so important that Reece and Derek would betray him.

Looking at him now, I'm reminded of a freezing lake. There's a layer of coldness on the surface and I realise with a start that Drew and I have never fought before. We've always kept our conversations light-hearted and centered around harmless topics like childhood memories and college plans.

Taking a breath slowly through my nostrils, I inspect the faces of the other people at the table. Leah and Benjamin seem unsettled by how tense the atmosphere has gotten, but Delaney is rather unworried. Amused, even.

I force my hands to unclench from my shirt. "I'm not speaking for Reece, or even Derek. It's just that Terrence has helped me more than any other Monarch, so I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt. We can talk about the possibility of the others being blackmailed later. Agreed?"

"Fine," Drew tells me, the antithesis of the boy on the bus a few days ago. Hopeless. "But, please, don't let your guard down around any of them."