Music: KNOCKING ON HEAVEN'S DOOR || Raign

Written for the @WattpadHornsandHalos contest in collaboration with the @flashfic profile. The prompt was the above song, the title of which we had to incorporate into the story. I am delighted to announce 'Ascension' was selected as the winning piece.

Silence. Its timpani pounds against my skull like the aftershock following a catastrophe. I feel oddly disassociated, incomplete; my sense of self - lost. 

Where am I? What is this place? I am conscious and yet I am not. Panic starts to seep into my bones.

Initially dulled, my senses gradually stir.  They reawaken one at a time as if rising from a millennia-long sleep, and the loud boom in my head recedes. 

I inhale. The scent of a summer meadow and fresh cotton fills my nostrils; it comforts me somewhat, tugging a memory not yet wholly composed. Bittersweet and inexplicably profound.

Ripples of light and shadow flit across my lids, causing me to flinch for I cannot seem to open my eyes. Now I experience fear of the unknown, my heart constricting, a unified quiver passing through my body from head to toe. And then, within a heartbeat, I am strangely imbued with serenity so pure my welded eyes shed tears; a calm so sublime. This release acts as a solvent and my lids part, slowly, opening to a misty, ethereal environment, magical, alien. 

I am astounded to find myself horizontal on a roiling bed of brume.  What can this mean? Another flutter of panic skips through me but dissipates just as quickly.  I push myself up, expecting my hands to vanish into the vapour, but they don't, and I manage to stand. 

My vision takes a few moments to clear, the revelation, however, provides no immediate answer for my now probing mind. I am surrounded by a buttermilk sky stretching to infinity. Muted coloured nebula move silently past me, their shapes constantly altering from the soft currents carrying them into the distance. Some caress my cheek, their candyfloss softness mingles with my tears, brushing them away.

Sound filters through the air. It reaches my ears like a song, the melody familiar, comforting. 

I look up as the clouds part, giving way to a golden beam. Its radius increases and brightens as it cuts a path through the vapour, its trail shimmering like gossamer. The clouds swirl and dance when the light touches them, causing them to reform, morph into something else. On closer inspection, I see the likeness of faces, torsos, limbs. Wings!

I shake my head in disbelief as they float in front of me; their minacious presence is both beautiful and yet terrifying.  The realisation hits me like an eighteen-wheeler in the fast lane; brutal, merciless - final. I am knocking on Heaven's door - or about to. 

My name is whispered on the wind, over and over, the sound becoming hypnotic, reassuring. Then suddenly to my right, another voice speaks. "Let go. It is your time. Be not afraid."

But, afraid I am. I have not lived a sound or wholesome life, at least not in the eyes of many. My sense of righteousness had its brand name forged in the fires of revenge, tempered with my interpretation of justice. 

Long ago, I had said farewell to my family - my beloved wife and precious son. They were taken from me by another's act of sheer brutality, and I had sought vengeance. At first, I owned it, but soon it swallowed me whole, and I became a killer, a vigilante, pretending I was the hero helping the vulnerable, the victims of heinous crimes. But in reality, I had become a monster.

I have never believed in the Pearly Gates nor the soul's ascension to an unworldly place. 'Tis but poppycock! Once we die, we are gone, but if lucky, perhaps an echo of us remains if we've touched someone's life and made them feel just a little bit better. That is a claim I cannot make, however, and so now, here I stand, fearful of a higher justice of which I have denied even exists.

I watch, helpless, as waves of cirrostratus part, revealing a monumental door before me. I have no choice; I must accept the judgement which is about to be bestowed upon me. I reach out, my fingers curling into a fist, ready to knock. With a subdued whoosh amid rising whorls of vapour, the colossal door opens. 

Phantasmal figures hover nearby, their spectral bodies formulating, becoming substantial; pristine wings unfurl, opening as if in welcome. Humbled, I slouch, noting their serene faces, impassive, beautiful and openly haunting. I step towards Heaven's threshold, the fate of my soul, if indeed I still own one, surrendering to the all-powerful entity awaiting my arrival.

"Mitch."

I falter. That voice; its resonance has never left me. 

My eyes travel the path before me, expectant, hopeful, tearful. The only saviour I have ever known is waiting - and she is the love of my life. "Julia," I whisper, dumbstruck by her evident joy in seeing me.  She stands, arms outstretched, a pure white gown floating around her body and a smile which banishes all my doubts and fears. From behind the rippling folds of her dress, two bright blue eyes watch me. "Ben!" My heart is about to burst.

"Daddy?" His innocent face comes into full view, his smile broadening.

My family rush to hug me, and I fall into their loving embrace. 

As the giant door starts to close, the gentle sway of multi-faceted nebula closes around us, and the angelic beings usher us in. In that instant, I realise I am not here to receive judgement. 

I am here for divine forgiveness.