29. Love and Fear

Lena Matthews

As it turned out, Jane-Anne was secretly an ice princess. She had changed back into her school uniform in a matter of seconds, and was outperforming all of us on the rink. Her skates glided along the ice, leaving behind graceful white trails. Unlike the rest of us, Jane-Anne was in her element.

I was terrified to move my skates any more than a couple of inches. My hand dragged along the wall for an extra layer of security. I've never been ice skating in my life, but I had always assumed that it would be easy to move in a simple circle. I had assumed incorrectly.

"Not a lot of ice rinks in California, I see." Taylor teased. I glared at her. If Jane-Anne hadn't been present, I would have tried some dryad magic on her. Unfortunately, Jane-Anne was present, and I sucked at dryad magic.

"Watch out!" Carter called from behind me. That was all the warning I needed to dive for the wall and hug it like my life depended on it. Carter slammed into the wall, missing me by a few inches. He laughed breathlessly. "I am never going to be doing this again." He informed me under his breath, but still grinned.

"Right." I said, not matching his upbeat attitude.

"What's wrong?" Carter asked. "You know I was just teasing you about Jacob."

"It's Makaya. She gave me a summons. I have to talk to the Forbidden Court again." I huffed.

"Wait, why?" Carter asked.

"Apparently, my location during Flora's death was suspicious. I mean, I thought that being murdered was a good enough alibi, but I was wrong." I said, frustrated.

"Is it a private meeting?" Carter asked.

"Yeah. Why?" I responded.

"A private meeting is nothing to be worried about. It's something the Court does to appease the town. Nothing serious is going to happen." Carter explained.

"I don't care! Why is this town suspecting me of anything? They can't possibly think that-"

"This town is full of people that have been running from the Agency for years. Forgive them for being a little paranoid." said Carter.

"Hey guys, what's going on?" Jane-Anne asked, gliding right next to us.

Startled, Carter fell onto the ice. "Little warning next time!" He complained.

"Sorry." said Jane-Anne, helping Carter up. "I wasn't trying to scare anyone. What were you guys talking about?"

"Um..." my mind was completely failing me, and Carter wasn't helping.

"Hey Jane-Anne, I bet you can't beat me in a race!" Kiara called over her shoulder. She was a bit better at skating than I was, but nowhere near Jane-Anne's level. Kiara's challenge reminded me of how Finn made Aurelie play rock-paper-scissors in the car while the agents loaded weapons.

"You're on!" Jane-Anne announced, dropping her earlier question. I let out a small sigh of relief.

"Can you guys try not talking about the Forbidden today?" Taylor asked, irritated.

"It's none of your business." Carter snapped.

"Keeping the secret is absolutely my business." said Taylor. She and Carter looked like they were two seconds away from trying to kill each other.

"What's going on with you guys?" I asked.

"I'm sorry, I'm just stressed." Taylor admitted. "It's been a rough week."

"Is he okay?" Carter asked.

"What do you mean?" Taylor snapped.

"Your dad. I've heard some people talking." Carter elaborated.

"He's fine." said Taylor. "Just old." She turned her focus back onto the ice and skated away.

"I won!" Jane-Anne cheered enthusiastically, her hands up in the air.

"I let you win!" Kiara called breathlessly, a significant distance behind the celebrating Jane-Anne.

"Sure you did." I replied sarcastically.

"You guys are the worst." said Kiara."I totally could have beaten her."

"I believe you!" Taylor piped up.

"Really?"

"No."

"Ivy, you know you don't have to lean on the wall like that, right?" Jane-Anne asked, coming to my side.

"I like the wall." I insisted. "It's a really great wall." I patted it gently to try and convince Jane-Anne that I was leaning against it by choice, but nearly tumbled onto the ice.

"Come on." said Jane-Anne, holding out a gloved hand. "Let me help you." I stared at Jane-Anne's hand doubtfully before accepting it.

To my surprise, I didn't face-plant right away. Jane-Anne did her best to help me with the ice, and I actually wasn't that bad after some practice. Every once in a while, Jane-Anne would let me go just so I could prove to myself that I could skate on my own. I was almost disappointed when it was time for lunch.

"A toast." Jane-Anne announced, holding up her sparkling cider. The restaurant was crowded with couples, but Jane-Anne had gotten a reservation for all of us. Pink and red streamers reminded us that we were the only group of singles in the room. Glittering hearts shed their disappointment on our table from their place on the ceiling. Jane-Anne was the only one standing, her glass in the air.

"A toast to all of us." Jane-Anne continued. "There's been a lot of bad that's happened recently. I know that the last thing any of us need to care about is relationships and this stupid day, but..." Jane-Anne sighed as she searched for the right words. "I'm really tired of the bad, and that probably makes me selfish, but I don't care. This day is supposed to be a holiday, so it's supposed to make people happy. Single or not, as long today makes us happy, it serves its purpose, right?

"I thought about what makes me happy, and it's the people here. So I wanted to do something special. We've been through so much bad, and I forget the good sometimes. I mean, I've been forgetting a lot of things, but still. Here's a toast to taking a day for us. To turning a dumb holiday into what makes us happy. Each other."

Jane-Anne sounded so sincere that I couldn't help feeling guilty again. In her deep brown eyes, I couldn't see any hatred. Jane-Anne had no idea how I had betrayed her, or the way Kiara and Taylor were keeping her entrapped for her mother.

"Cheers to that." said Taylor, raising her glass. I couldn't find a trace of remorse in her voice. I didn't know how she did it.

"Cheers." I said quietly as everyone else echoed Taylor's sentiment. Glasses clinked against each other, echoing across the table.

When I finally made it back home, I was exhausted. Even though I was reluctant to admit it, I had enjoyed my Jane-Anne adventure. I flopped onto the couch and prepared to fall asleep.

"Lena! I just fluffed the pillows!" Dad exclaimed, frustrated. I stifled a laugh. Dad really was taking Valentine's Day seriously.

"Any plans for today, Agent Matthews?" I teased.

"Your mother and I are going out tonight." said Dad. "I made reservations at Moriyama's a couple weeks ago."

"I was just there for lunch with some friends." I said casually.

"You weren't at school?" Mom asked, joining the conversation with her arms crossed.

"No, Jane-Anne ambushed us with ice skating." I explained.

"Watch out!" Aurelie called from behind Mom. I could hear the patter of small feet build to a sprint. I saw a blur of dark hair before Aurelie's tiny body landed on me.

"What do you think you're doing?" I asked playfully. I tossed Aurelie to the other side of the couch as she giggled uncontrollably, bouncing on the couch cushions.

"That was for walking back without me and Finn!" Aurelie declared. "I don't get how you walk so fast." For a second, my heart clenched in fear. I laughed off Aurelie's comment and hoped that nobody would think about it.

"Don't throw your sister, Lena!" said Mom. "You're going to mess up the pillows." I let out an awkward laugh and reminded myself to never teleport back from school again.

"Sorry." I said. "Shouldn't you be getting ready for a date or something?"

Mom actually blushed at my comment. "Come on, Aurelie, I have something to show you." She announced. Both of them journeyed up the stairs together, Aurelie skipping ahead. In Mom's absence, Dad took it upon himself to fix the pillows.

"Dad, calm down." said Finn, noticing the rather violent way Dad was fluffing the pillows. "That's not a Forbidden or something."

"Right." said Dad sheepishly.

I got up from the couch, an unsettling feeling in my stomach. "I'm going to go out for some fresh air." I decided.

"Didn't you just get back from school?" Finn asked, confused.

"Yeah." I muttered, pushing him aside to get outside. The indoors were perpetually suffocating, but it was way worse right now.

As soon as I set foot outside, an instant wave of relief washed over me. I walked to the backyard barefoot. With each step I took, the grass became a more vibrant green, but shriveled soon after I left. As the tranquility fell away, dread and fear took its place.

Never in a million years had I expected to feel like this. Everything had flipped upside down in the span of months, and now my family was one of my greatest fears. Once upon a time, my greatest nightmare had been the Forbidden. It was a powerful terror that didn't let me sleep for years.

I closed my eyes and shuddered, thinking about the day the Forbidden became real for me.

A warm hand grasped my wrist tightly. I looked down at the pale hand that had appeared from nowhere, and looked up to see a beautiful, smiling face with curly black hair and my nose. She looked like she was going to cry.

"We need to go." She whispered to me. It was quiet, but I could still make out the words. I felt like I was sharing the most important secret in the world. I spared a glance back at my family, who were somewhere else in the mall. I wasn't sure when I had started to outpace them, but they were completely out of my view. Before I could call to them, the strange woman pulled me away.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Away." said the woman vaguely. "I'm going to need you to wait in the car while I get your brother and sister." The woman turned to me and gave me a soft smile. She knelt down and touched my face gingerly. "You've gotten so big. How old are you now?"

"Twelve." I answered, brushing her hands away. I wasn't fond of my private space being invaded, even by this woman who I felt like I could trust. "Who are you?"

The woman smiled. "I'm a friend."

I frowned. "But I've never seen you before. I'm not stupid. No one is supposed to trust strangers."

She laughed. "We're not strangers, Lena Matthews." She smiled again, and I found myself smiling back. I was so lost in wonder about this woman that I didn't hold any fear in my heart. I just let her take me to wherever we were going.

The woman placed her hand on my back and lead me to a large black car. She opened the door for me and let me get inside the passenger's seat, which was exciting for me. Finn always got to sit in the passenger's seat.

"Why do we have to go away?" I asked."Are Mom and Dad going to meet us there?"

The woman faltered, and pursed her lips for a moment. "They aren't."

"Why?" I asked.

"I'm not sure how to explain, but this really is for the best. I'm going to need you to trust me. Can you do that for me, Lena?"

I nodded.

"Okay then." said the woman, buckling my seat belt. "I'll be right back. Wait right here." The door shut, leaving me inside. It was winter, but the car wasn't cold. Even though the engine wasn't running, I didn't shiver as I waited patiently for the woman to return with Finn and Aurelie.

I never stopped to question who she was, or how she knew me, or what she wanted. I never questioned why I was waiting patiently in a black car with tinted windows in the back of a shopping mall with no witnesses nearby. I was willing to override all of that because of a feeling. There was a comforting warmth that came from the woman, and it made me want to ignore every mounting red flag.

When the woman came back, Aurelie and Finn were nowhere in sight. I saw her run towards the car, her beautiful face littered with bruises. As she sprinted, horror in her eyes and her hair flying behind her, I thought I could make out a strange birthmark on her shoulder, shaped like an F.

I saw Dad close behind, a gun in his hand. He wasn't running. An eerie tranquility was in his eyes as he pointed the weapon.

Bang.

I heard blood curdling screams as the woman folded, tears in her eyes. "Stop!" I screamed. I struggled against the seat belt, but it had tightened, locking me into my seat.

The woman stood back up, her legs shaking. Her back was facing the window, and I got a perfect view of the gunshot wound. Terror filled my soul as I watched red bleed into her clothes.

"Dad! Stop!" I begged, my voice cracking.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

I desperately fidgeted with the buckle keeping me in place. The seat belt finally released as an orange light exploded across the lot. I covered my eyes with my arm in surprise. When I looked back out the window, the woman was gone.

"Lena?" Dad asked. He opened the car door and dragged me out, pulling me into a hug.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled, forcing him away. I looked behind me, and my eyes rested on the crimson blood that had splattered onto the car. "What did you do?" I asked, unable to stop a stream of frantic tears.

"Lena, it's about time we talked about something really important." said Dad, refusing to elaborate.

"Where did she go?" I asked, panic building in my chest.

Dad grabbed my shoulders. "Lena, I need you to get yourself together, right now." His authority frightened me. I instantly straightened my posture and tried to choke my tears out of existence. "Good." said Dad. "Now, I need you to listen to what I'm about to tell you really carefully."

I wiped the stubborn tears from my face and tried to collect myself. It was four years ago, but that fear was still real. I sighed, and sat down on the ground.

Deep down, I knew that Valentine's Day was a scam, a way to profit off the love in the world. But maybe love itself was a scam too. Because as hard as I tried, I couldn't find love for my father anymore. Just fear. Just like that day.

A/N: Like the chapter title entails, we had two very different arcs in this section. One was definitely more lighthearted than the other. The second half of the chapter had a pretty interesting insight, and probably explains the insomnia. As always, thank you so much for reading, and I will see you soon!

QOTD: Why do you think someone would kidnap Lena?

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