Lena Matthews

"Nope." Carter frowned in dissatisfaction at his  handiwork and pushed the bottle of foundation away from him.

"She's wearing long sleeves." Jessica pointed out. "This doesn't have to be a work of art."

"If you think I'm going to let her go home without the perfect match, you're mistaken." said Carter. Time was clearly not of the essence for him. Maybe living long enough does that.

"We're going to be late." said Jessica.

"Don't interrupt the process!" Carter interjected. He tried another shade on the beauty blender and went back to work on trying to conceal my Forbidden brand. "Great. And that one's too dark." Carter grabbed the first foundation he had tried about an hour ago and passed it to me. "Just use that one for now. That was the closest."

"Thanks." I said, stifling a laugh.

"Now, look over here. What do you see?" Carter asked, pointing to the side of his neck.

"Nothing." I answered, confused.

"Exactly." said Carter proudly.

"Wait, that's where you Forbidden brand is?" I asked, genuinely amazed.

"Yep. Now, just to be sure, you do understand how to blend, right?" Carter asked.

"Yes." I said, slightly insulted.

"Just checking. You never wear makeup." said Carter, causing me to roll my eyes. "All I'm saying is that now's a good time to start. Sometimes you get breakouts when you come back from the dead."

Carter's perfectionism ended up making us late to Mrs. Delaney's funeral. School had been cancelled so the entire town could come. Two funerals in the span of a month. It was chilling, and even those who didn't know about the Forbidden were noticing that something was wrong. I spotted my family, but for the first time, wanted absolutely nothing to do with them. They were already sitting down, so I told myself that I would see them after the service.

As the ceremony went on, I ran through every other alternative. I obviously couldn't avoid my family forever, but I could try, couldn't I? My leg bounced nervously as the service continued. I realized that I might prefer sitting through this funeral purgatory to going home.

Everyone was beginning to stand before I knew what was going on. I sat frozen on the pew as people milled around, waiting to give Mr. Delaney their sincere condolences.

"Ivy?" I jumped in my seat, but it was just Jane-Anne. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Jane-Anne sat herself down next to me. She was alone, but in my peripheral, I could spot Taylor's watchful eyes drilled into Jane-Anne's back.

"Hey." I said unenthusiastically.

"Something wrong? You look different." Jane-Anne squinted her brown eyes at me. For someone with next to no social awareness, she was observant.

"Nothing, it's just..." I gestured around me.

"Yeah." Jane-Anne agreed, looking around. "I don't even know if I've caught my breath since last time. Did you have her class?"

"I just moved here." I reminded Jane-Anne.

"Right. Forget I said that. My brain's been all over the place lately." said Jane-Anne.

"That's fine." I assured her. "I think this whole town's earned the right to be scatterbrained." I tried to smile, but I was having trouble looking at Jane-Anne without being overtaken by guilt. "I need to go." I said. Jane-Anne had to get up so I could slide out of the pew and walk down the aisle to talk to Mr. Delaney.

Mr. Delaney was exchanging some somber words with an older couple. His face darkened the moment he saw me. "I'll be right back." I could hear Mr. Delaney tell the couple as I got closer.

"Can we talk in private?" I asked Mr. Delaney.

"Of course." said Mr. Delaney. His voice sounded gravelly and choked, but he still managed to keep his composure as he opened the door to an empty hallway of the church.

The lights in the hallway were shut off, and we couldn't hear anyone around. I cleared my throat, unsure of how to start the conversation.

"So," said Mr. Delaney, taking it upon himself to start talking, "It's nice to meet you, Lena Matthews. I've heard a lot of things about you." Mr. Delaney reached into his pocket and handed me a card. As I looked at it, I recognized it as my Agency ID. I took the card and stared at it blankly.

"I..." I had no idea where to begin. "I think you should move." I said finally.

"I know. I'm looking at a house in California. I think I need to start over." said Mr. Delaney.

"Good." I said, awkwardly turning the card in my hands. "Why didn't Flora tell anyone about me?"

"Mostly to avoid panic. If we did something about your family, the Agency would just make all current and former citizens of Atalka a priority. We have a better chance if we wait this out. And now there's a double agent." said Mr. Delaney. He nodded in my direction.

"Me?" I asked. "Why would I do anything?"

"Mutually assured destruction." Mr. Delaney answered.

I sighed. "I don't know if this is going to make you feel better, but I'm sorry about what happened."

"I'm sorry too, Lena. I have to remind myself that you're some kid with the wrong family." said Mr. Delaney. I wasn't sure how to respond.

"How are Iris and Jasper? Are they okay?" I asked.

"Someone was nice enough to watch them. They weren't really up for the service." Mr. Delaney explained. "Actually, could you tell them it's time to go? They're in the playroom down the hall and to the left."

"Sure." I said. I didn't realize that I had been rubbing my wrist until I looked down at the smeared foundation, exposing my Forbidden brand. Carter was definitely going to kill me.

Mr. Delaney left to face the crowd of mourners again. I immediately turned around to find the playroom, eager for another excuse to avoid my family. I tucked the card in my purse along with my phone and the bottle of foundation.

I could hear the playroom before I actually saw it. High School Musical was playing so loudly I could make out the exact scene from here. The playroom had large windows that were painted over with trees and a smiling sun. As I approached the windows, I could see Iris and Jasper giggling as they ran away from their baby-sitter, who just so happened to be Jacob Wilde.

I cursed under my breath, and could already feel my cheeks flush with embarrassment. I felt my face nervously as I spun around to walk in the opposite direction. I had no idea where this reaction was coming from.

I could hear the pattering sound of young feet chase me down the empty hall. Arms embraced me from behind, taking me off guard.

"You came back." A hopeful voice whispered. I turned around, forcing Iris to release her grip on me. She looked up at my face, disappointment evident in her expression. "I thought you were someone else." Her big green eyes looked moments away from crying.

"I'm sorry." I said.

Iris took my hand, which was at her eye level, and turned it so that a part my Forbidden brand was visible. She pulled my sleeve up, her gaze locked so intensely that I didn't say anything about the invasion of personal space. I even got on my knees so that Iris could get a better look. Iris traced my Forbidden brand with her finger pensively.

"Mommy didn't want to do it. But she made her." said Iris, looking back up at me. Her eyes reflected an intelligence that was way too old for her. "Mommy said to tell you that she was sorry."

"I forgive her." I said, truly meaning it. Iris wiped a tear that had fallen onto my cheek.

I could hear more footsteps coming. I sniffled and pulled my sleeve down quickly. As I stood up, I tried to act like I hadn't been on the verge of a breakdown two seconds ago.

"Iris, you weren't supposed to..." Jacob stopped when he saw me. "Hey, I didn't know you were here."

"Um... Mr. Delaney sent me. It's time for you guys to go." I looked down at Iris and then Jasper, who was trailing right behind Jacob. Jasper was staring at me as if I had grown two heads. I wondered if he could sense that we were similar now.

"Come on Jasper." said Iris. Jasper slowly walked to his sister's side before both of them broke into a full on sprint back to their father.

I watched them leave, and thought about following them. I wanted to get out of this suffocating church, but my options weren't that great. I could go home and hide the fact that I was Forbidden, or go to Jessica and hide the fact that my family was associated with the Agency.

I didn't want to be anywhere. I wanted to melt through the floor and never deal with another conscious thought again. I was tangled in way too many webs spun between two warring factions that I'd never fully be a part of and never fully escape. I looked down to realize that I had been rubbing my Forbidden brand again, like I had to remind myself that this was actually real.

"What's that?" Jacob asked innocently.

"Nothing." I said defensively before pulling my sleeve back down."Is it weird that we keep meeting each other at funerals?"

"Yeah, I'm not sure that bodes well for us." said Jacob, smiling.

"Us?" I asked stupidly. A deafening silence followed, engulfing in its awkwardness.

I turned around again, ready to leave this conversation, and maybe Atalka altogether. As soon as I looked behind me, the doors opened loudly, allowing a flood of mourners to proceed through the hallway. I pivoted immediately, and managed to walk straight into Jacob.

"Crap." Jacob muttered, looking at the people beginning to shuffle towards him. I thought back to the scene he had caused at Rowan's funeral just by being there.

"Come on." I instructed.

I ended up pulling Jacob along with me as I searched for the exit. This part of the church had been constructed like a labyrinth, and I ended up relying on Jacob to get me out.

Outside, there were even more attendees milling around. A sense of relief filled me as soon as I could breathe fresh air again. But it was short lived. I could feel the sensation of dozens of gazes landing on me critically. I wasn't even sure what I was doing wrong. I felt completely exposed.

It took me a moment to register that no one was looking at me, but at Jacob. All I had to do was move away from him, and this wouldn't be my problem anymore. It was really simple. The only thing so far that has been handed to me on a silver platter. All I had to do was leave him.

But I didn't.

Instead, my convoluted solution was to leave as fast as I could and drag Jacob with me. I started to walk faster and faster, until I was running away from everyone else.

"Care to explain why we're running?" Jacob kept up with me effortlessly as both of us glided away from the crowd.

"Because... I..." I didn't have a solid answer except that I was going through my own issues and didn't want to go through them alone.

For some reason, I felt attached to Jacob. It was something that my subconscious decided, so I had no say. Maybe it was because he was already familiar to me because of that TV show, or because he represented the alternative. The version of me who had walked into the music room instead of getting murdered by a dryad. Something might have happened to me anyway considering Iris' strange words, but I couldn't move past the idea that staying would have been enough to save me from living forever. From living longer than Finn, Aurelie, and everyone. Maybe Flora was lucky that she got the easy way out. She would never have to bury her husband or children. Maybe that's why my grandmother left.

There wasn't a way to explain my spiraling thought process to someone I still considered a stranger, even if he was willing to go along with whatever this was. Luckily, I never had to give an answer.

Unluckily, that was because I tripped on the curb and gracefully landed onto the asphalt.

"Are you okay?" Jacob helped me up gingerly, and I actually let him. I glanced down at my legs, which were striped with a violent red that stung. There was something comforting in the fact that I could still bruise. I just couldn't age.

"I'm fine. I've just been going through a lot recently." I explained. "I don't know why..." I trailed off, unsure of what I even wanted to say. I looked at the surroundings, unsure of how far I'd managed to run. I could spot the church and the crowd of black in the distance. We were a lot closer to the downtown right now, and I could almost make out the dress shop where Makaya and I had talked.

I wasn't sure how to exit this situation in a way that wasn't painfully awkward. But I also wasn't sure if I wanted to leave.

"Can I show you something?" Jacob asked.

"What?" I asked.

"It's kind of a secret." said Jacob, refusing to divulge anything else. He held out his hand to lead me to wherever the heck this secret place was.

The confusion must have been overly evident on my face.

"Do you trust me?" Jacob asked.

The answer was no. Not yet anyway. At this rate, I didn't have it in me to trust anyone. But I could feel my common sense exiting my body as I took the hand being offered to me.

"Why not?"

A/N: I call this: procrastination at its finest. Lena is stuck in a really awful and complex situation, but it looks like her way of coping is to find a boy. But Iris definitely said some weird stuff today. The mysteries continue to build... and Lena is doing a good job of avoiding it.

QOTD: What is something ridiculous you've done in the name of procrastination?