My sister is in a mood again. I can always tell by the awkward gait she walks with when she's sad, her tail swishing like a viper, ready to strike, and her Verhamera's Horns pressed back as far as they can go.

I'm off in the clouds, thinking about my mother, so I guess I'm not helping much either, but I can hardly help it. I just can't stop thinking about my mother, and the way she turned when I called her full name. It was actually just a guess, well-planned as it seemed in retrospect.

I was trying to imitate his voice.

I guess I did a good job.

I shuffle over towards the pile of prey, which is under vigilant guard by several larger Canis. Like us, they're vividly colored, almost like a field of flowers. The floral theme is what gives us an identity, unites us, so you'd think that the daughters of the one who tends to those plants would be revered by the pack.

You'd be wrong, of course, but it's still a nice thought.

One of the Canii looks down at me, his mottled violet coat blowing in the wind. "Ay, it's Lotus and Natrina. How are you two doing? Busy tending the flowers?" There's a sort of pity deep in his eyes, but it's only with the best of intentions.

Natrina doesn't answer him, but instead takes some squirrel from the pile and I take a bird. I not respectfully to them as she walks in the opposite direction, unnerved by their presence.

"Be careful! Don't wander too far away." yells the purple Canis.

"There are suspicious characters in the woods." notes a lovely blue Canis by his side. I think I recognize her from somewhere, but bad with names as I am, I wouldn't know. I amiably continue along with my sister, who's picking up the pace.

"Natrina!" I reprimand her. "We could at least have a conversation with them for once!"

"Sorry, I was just... a bit occupied."

"Thinking about Mother?"

She gulps. "Maybe. Yes. I don't know. I just wish that she would pay a little more attention to us than her plants."

"I'm sure she loves us. It's not like we can do anything about us. It's not her fault she thinks about our father every time she sees us." I say, trying to reassure her, pressing my head against hers.

Natrina pulls away suddenly, looking up at the sky. I know it's bad when she avoids eye contact. It's one of her cues. "Lotus... I want to run away."

I feel something cold sink into my heart, only to be replaced with a burning indignation. "Natrina, we can't ditch the pack!" The grass begins growing very quickly around my paws.

"No. You're right. I'm completely crazy." She looks down towards my paws. "I don't know. I just want to get out of here. Have the adventure we always wanted. There has to be something better for us."

"I hear autumn will be setting in soon."

It's a joke between us. When I was little, I used to have dreams all the time about dark figures talking about odd and mundane things in ominous tones. I used to be scared of them, but they slowly became a joke as I got older, and now I guess I believe them. Change will be here, if only for the worse.

Natrina lies down by a tree and looks out into the forest. I lie down next to her and look out at the trees. They're still bright green, but the way they rustle in the wind brings to mind a certain scent. The chill breezes, the leaves on the cusp of turning... we will be eight turns of the world old. "We'll finally get our jobs soon. No more making plants grow and loitering, waiting for them to tell us there's open space for another flank member on the hunts."

"I know." she says.

We sit there for a while, in silence, and then get up and take a few paces around camp. We pass by other Canii, exchange a few words, and take another stop to get a quick snack. It seems like the whole day passes quickly as water flowing downstream, and I find myself beside her again at night.

It fills me with an odd sense of dread. Her words still ring in my head.

There has to be something better for us.

I close my eyes quietly and focus on her breathing, in and out in a steady rhythm that becomes my lullaby as I fall asleep.

I wake up in the dark. The smell of decay is in the air, dead grass grasps my paws, and though there is no light, the dark figures overhead appear to be trees. I recognize immediately that I'm in a dream. I taught myself to do it when I was young, to stop the nightmares, but I was never quite able to bend the dream world to my will. Instead, I sit powerless in the darkness, reassuring myself it isn't real.

A cool breeze picks up, and all around me, leaves begin flying, illuminated by the edges, which are rimmed with embers. They're burning. I take in deep breaths, ignoring the tingling of embers razing my side, setting my fur ablaze, but now my whole body is on fire and it's growing harder and harder to concentrate.

It's not real. It's not real.

Imagine you're picking flowers.

Focus.

A voice invades my mind, prying open the last sacred place I have as if it was a flower petal. Autumn is fast approaching, Lotus.

It does not sound angry. The voice sounds regretful, maybe even sad, as if the knowledge is a burden.

The leaves stop fluttering, falling to the ground around me and the fire sizzles out. I hear pawsteps quietly approaching, and two green eyes peer through the gloom, attached to a muzzle full of viciously sharp teeth and fiery red fur that seems to burn like fire itself.

"Who are you?"

She opens her mouth and no sound comes out.

"Come on, you can tell me!"

She's frantically shaking her head, mouthing words that won't come out, and she looks like she's about to cry.

"Is something wrong?"

She turns around, and something invisible stabs her from behind. I can't see what hit her but I see her pupils contract, and she begins coughing blood. She looks up at me, and she keeps shaking her head, still mouthing words I can't hear.

I open my eyes and look around. Natrina is still sleeping, but upon looking outside, I realize it's still nighttime. Just a nightmare.

They're getting more and more realistic. I haven't told her how scared I am. She thinks I've gotten over them. I guess there's only one Canis I can ask for help now.

I stumble into the middle of camp, my paws aching from the effort of keeping my barely conscious body up and moving. The garden stands before me like the Canii at the edge of camp, silently judging me and my large horns. I nose my way around them, past the lilies and the roses, taking a left at the coltsfoot, and stopping next to the lavender.

My mother's namesake plant, the alstromeria, grow in an arch around the entrance to her den. She built it low but the inside is ornately decorated, a testament to her skill. I breathe in her still milky scent combined with that of many flowers, including some of the more exotic flowers. She has always had a passionate love for flowers, despite having plants of all kinds at her disposal. The whole place is lit by moonlight streaming in through the leaves and luminous nightlace, which is a special herb used to lift the mood of those unable to cope with their sadness but also gives off a faint glow.

I remember with a sweet nostalgia when my sister and I slept here. We were only one turn of the seasons, it was winter, and Fen, our father, was still here.

"Mother?"
To my surprise, she looks up right away. Her eyes, obviously bloodshot in the pale light of the flowers, reveal she wasn't even sleeping. "Where is your sister?"

"I've been having the dreams again." I cut right to the point.

"You're scared of them." she counters.
"Of course I'm scared! I watched some random Canis I don't even know die and there's the whole stupid thing about autumn. I just... I don't want it to be true. Any of it."

"Do not doubt your predictions. If you are anything like me, your predictions are more true than you realize."

I realize with a pang of disappointment that I was expecting comfort where I have received cruel, hard fact.

"However, you won't know how these dreams will come to pass until you see it with your own eyes. Do not take their interpretations literally. I know that I was surprised at how my very first prediction came true."

"What... what was it?"

"I was much older than you are now. It was ten turns of the planet ago, when I was far more foolish. I dreamed that I was out at sea, stuck on only a piece of wood to cling on to, and as I looked around, I saw all my loved ones. The alpha. Your grandmother. My father. My friends. Slowly but surely, the storm pulled them away from me. As I stood there, helpless, barely keeping my balance, I felt someone wrap themselves around me, their warmth engulfing me, and I felt safe. I later realized that it was your father. I remember so vividly how warm his embrace was. It was the same way I felt the first time we met in real life, and he drew so close to me that could smell the sea on his breath."

"But it came true? I mean, you lost everyone close to you?"

"Nonsense. I still have you two and Fen."

My ears flatten. She's talking about Fen again. Yet somehow... I can't tell her he's not coming back.

I look back at her quietly, turning to go. "I love you, mom."

"I love you too, Lotus."