The Dowager Duchess of Kimberly sat at the head of the table. The Duke was to her right, I to her left. Even though he was right across from me, I felt more exposed now that he was not beside me. I felt too close to the Duchess, and it was as if she could see right through me.
"Susan, you have hardly said a word all evening," the Duchess observed as the footmen served the first course.
"I am sorry, I hope that I have not offended you, Duchess. I am quite tired," I replied.
"Yes, we had dinner at the Winton Estate last night and stayed the evening since it is closer to your house than mine is," the Duke of Bedford explained.
I was glad that the Duke came up with that excuse. Not only did it explain my lack of sociability, but I knew the Earl of Winton, so if the subject veered towards him, I would know what was going on.
"Ah, I am glad that you are still friends with Lord Winton," the Duchess nodded. "I always liked him; he is an honourable man."
"Yes, he is," the Duke agreed. "And he is a loyal friend. I am grateful for his friendship."
"Has he managed to find himself a wife?"
"No, not yet."
"Well, there is still time, I suppose. After all, if you can find a wife, then I suppose he can as well."
"Excuse me? What is that supposed to mean?"
"Oh, Cecil, you know that I am fond of you. But I honestly did not expect you to settle down. You spent all your time in university gambling and spending time with friends. Then once you graduated you spent more time with your companions than at balls trying to find yourself a wife."
"Well, I was young back then, and not ready to settle down."
"If you say so."
The Duke looked as if he was about to retort. He suddenly placed his hand over the wine glass as the butler passed by with a decanter.
"None for me, thank you," the Duke nodded.
"Very well, Your Grace," the butler replied. "Can I get you anything else to drink?"
"I am fine with water, thank you."
"Of course, sir."
The butler nodded and moved on to pour wine into my glass.
"You still do not drink?" The Duchess inquired.
"I never drink," he snapped. "You should know that by now."
For the first time ever, I saw the Duke of Bedford lose his sunny disposition. In all the times that I saw him, I had never seen him lose his temper. I had never heard him snap at anyone, except when he was sarcastic with Lord Winton. However, for a moment, I saw his brown eyes darken until they were almost black. Although he recomposed himself so quickly that I was not sure if I imagined it.
"I am sorry for mentioning it, Cecil," the Duchess said. "I should not have placed the glass at your spot."
"Everything is fine," the Duke muttered and stared down at his plate.
The Duchess nodded then turned to look at me, so I had to tear my gaze away from the Duke.
"Now, Susan, tell me a little more about yourself," the Duchess ordered. "You are the daughter of a baron. Do you have any siblings?"
"Yes, I do," I replied, trying my best to remember all the details that the Duke (and Lord Winton) had written down on a sheet for me. "I have three older brothers, two older sisters, and a younger brother."
"My, that is quite a family. And how is it that you noticed the Duke of Bedford?"
"My entire family was in the grand hall to greet the guests as they arrived for the party. He instantly caught my attention."
"Yes, and she caught my attention as well," the Duke added.
"He caught your attention?" The Duchess repeated, ignoring the Duke's interjection. "How is that?"
"Well, he seemed friendly when greeting us, and he appeared to be well-mannered," I explained.
"And I am much better looking than most noblemen who attended the house party," the Duke smirked, causing the Dowager to glare at him.
"How old are you, Susan?" The Duchess inquired.
"One and twenty," I responded.
"Well, I suppose that is not much of an age difference. After all, I have seen much older men marry women much younger than that."
"Age hardly matters when it comes to matters of the heart," the Duke informed.
The Dowager Duchess scoffed, "Have you become a poet since we last met?"
"Not quite. Although marriage can change someone."
"Indeed, it can. Though not always for the better. Oh, the stories that I could tell you about people who were already insufferable and became worse upon marriage."
"I am sure that you can. After all, you have come across many different people during your lifetime."
"Is that your way of saying that I am old?"
"Of course not," the Duke replied. "You are still young and in your prime."
"I do not appreciate your sarcasm, young man," the Duchess scolded.
I was grateful for the Duke commencing some sort of argument with his great-aunt, as it meant that she seemed to forget about me. I had been in service for many years and had met many different employers. Although none of them terrified me as much as the Dowager Duchess of Kimberly. There was something about that woman; perhaps it was how outspoken she was, or the fact that she was unafraid to commence arguments. Either way, I hoped that I would not have to spend many more evenings with her in the future.

Luckily for me, the Dowager Duchess and the Duke remained in a conversation for the majority of the dinner. It mostly involved her scolding the Duke for his behaviour, and him defending himself by attempting to say something witty. Most of the time it did not work, although I found it rather entertaining.
"Now, Cecil, I hope that you will attend the ball next week," the Dowager Duchess informed as the servants served dessert.
"Which ball?" The Duke inquired.
"Which ball? Surely you cannot be serious!"
"I am quite serious in this instance. Which ball? I get several invitations almost every day."
"The one held by Viscount Taywards. You know that his wife and I are very good friends."
"Ah, yes, I remember hearing you mentioning them before."
"And the Viscount was a close friend of your grandfather. Not going would be insulting. You must attend."
"Are you attending?"
"Do not be ridiculous. My party days are long over, my dear."
The Duke of Bedford chuckled, but I felt myself freeze in my seat. I knew that Lady Gwendoline taught me how to dance and play the piano, but I did not think I would ever have to use those skills. And the thought of attending a ball hosted by friends of the Dowager Duchess seemed terrifying.
"We will most certainly attend then," the Duke replied. "If it is that important to the family, then of course."
"Excellent," the Duchess nodded in approval. "Tell me, Susan, are you a fan of balls?"
It took me a moment to realize that the Dowager had addressed her comment to me; I had gotten used to observing the conversation.
"Uh, not particularly," I replied, forgetting that I was supposed to be an ideal lady of society.
"Oh, why is that?"
"Well, I enjoy the social aspect of the balls," I said hastily. "However dancing all evening can become rather tiresome."
"Ah, yes, I agree," the Duchess nodded, and I breathed a sigh of relief, hopefully, one that was not too noticeable. "Although now that you are a married woman, you will not have to dance as much as you did when you were a debutante. So that is something to look forward to."
"Indeed, it is."
"Well," the Duke of Bedford interjected. "This has been a lovely evening. The food was incredible. However, given the hour, and the time it takes for us to return to my estate, we ought to head out."
The Dowager nodded as she stood up, and we followed suit.
"It was a pleasure to meet you, Susan," the Duchess smiled. "I am glad that Cecil finally found someone. Do not be a stranger, you two ought to visit more often."
"It was nice to meet you, Duchess," I replied. "Thank you for your hospitality."
"Yes, everything was incredible," the Duke added, kissing his great-aunt's cheek.
"Promise to visit soon," the Duchess ordered.
"I do promise."
"Very well. I am holding you to that. Do not disappoint me."
"I will not. Goodbye, Aunt Adelaide."
"Goodbye, dear."
The Duke walked over to my seat, offered me his arm, and the butler lead us to the front door.

Once the two of us were in the carriage, I saw the Duke of Bedford's normally sunny disposition fade away. He let out a heavy sigh and leaned his head back onto the wall of the carriage.
"I am sorry if I disappointed you this evening," I said. "I tried my best, I promise."
"You were fine," he responded in an unconvincing manner without making eye contact with me.
"Are you sure? It is all right if I did not perform as well as you expected me to perform. You can share any notes for improvement with me if you wish."
"I said that you were fine. You are an excellent actress."
I knew that there was something wrong; the Duke was being extremely sarcastic and he clearly had things on his mind.
"If there is anything that you wish to talk about..." I started.
"Susan, please be quiet. I am tired," he ordered.
"Yes, sir," I muttered, forgetting that I was supposed to be speaking to him casually. I suddenly felt like a servant again.

The carriage pulled up at the Winton Estate. The Duke of Bedford climbed out of the carriage and then helped me down without saying a word. He headed to the door and gave it a sharp knock. I was still too much in shock from the Duke's sudden change in behaviour to remind myself to go in through the servants' entrance.
The door swung open and the butler stood before us.
"Your Grace," he bowed.
"Where is His Lordship?" The Duke inquired, entering the hall, and I followed silently.
"He is in his study, sir."
Without another word, the Duke strode across the entrance hall and headed for the staircase which lead to Lord Winton's study.
The butler looked at me with a puzzled expression, so I stared down at the ground. I did not want to start any conversation with him. Finally, he gave up on attempting to stare me down and headed back towards the servants' quarters.

As tired and confused as I was from the dinner, and the Duke's attitude, I was still a servant. So instead of turning in, I headed upstairs to Lady Gwendoline's bedroom. I saw that there was a sliver of light from the crack of her door, so I knocked.
"Come in!" Lady Gwendoline called.
I opened the door to find her sitting in bed, reading a book by candlelight.
"Good evening, m'lady," I curtsied.
"I told you to stop with the titles," she groaned.
"But we are not in training right now."
"You are always in training. Now close the door, sit down, and tell me how the evening went."
I shut the door behind me and pulled the chair from her dressing table over to the bed.
"Well?" Lady Gwendoline inquired. "How was it?"
"I am not sure," I shrugged.
"What do you mean that you are not sure? You were there, weren't you?"
"Yes, I was there. However, I am not sure if it went well. During the dinner, I thought everything was fine. The Dowager Duchess seemed to pay more attention to His Grace than to me. I was polite, and it seemed all right."
"That all sounds fine. So why are you so uncertain?"
"The Duke did not say a word to me in the carriage. He did not even look at me. I am afraid that I let him down."
"Based on what you said, it seems as if the dinner went fine. I do not know why Cecil acted like an ass in the carriage..."
"M'lady!" I gasped, shocked at her language.
"Oh, relax, Susan. Anyway, I would not worry about it if I were you. Men are mysteries," Lady Gwendoline assured.
"I suppose so."
"There is no suppose about it. They are. Someone ought to write a mystery novel about men."
I giggled slightly, glad to have Lady Gwendoline on my side. I realized that she reminded me of the Dowager Duchess of Kimberly, although slightly nicer.
"Is there anything that I can get you?" I inquired. "Do you need anything?"
"No, thank you, I am fine," Lady Gwendoline replied. "You should get some sleep; you had a long night. Do not stay up all night mending my dresses. You have done more than enough this evening. Do you understand? Go straight to bed."
"Very well. Goodnight."
"Goodnight, Susan."
I placed the chair back in its proper spot, bobbed a quick curtsy and left the room.

Once I was in my own bedroom, I gladly took Lady Gwendoline's dress off. I would never be able to get used to wearing fancy gowns every evening. Hopefully, the charade with the Duke of Bedford would end soon and I could return to my previous life.