Yu-Jun sat outside of a cafe drinking an iced coffee staring at the book in his hand. He'd read the last paragraph at least 5 times already but it still wasn't making sense.

The cafe was down the street from the psychiatrist he'd been going to when he first returned from his last trip to America a few years prior, when he'd been caught in an unexpected civil war. That war had lasted a year and a half. He'd been there during the first week. It ended 3 years ago today and today most Americans would be celebrating.

He thought about the girl he'd been forced to leave behind and what was left of his heart ached, most of it stayed behind with her. He thought about her almost everyday. Did she remember him? Did she miss him? Did she think about him? Was she the same person? Did she still love him? Why hadn't he told her how he felt? Was she even alive?  He hated the last question the most, it haunted him more and more everyday.

He closed his eyes and sighed then snapped the book shut. He stood up, deciding to go talk to his manager again about adding America to Nephilim's current tour.

Yu-Jun walked into his manager's building, the front desk security guard looked up and smiled. He bowed his head slightly, offering a 'hello' to Yu-Jun. Yu-Jun bowed his head back and smiled. He felt a flutter in his stomach. He took a deep breath and walked into his manager's office lobby, the secretary looked up and smirked. "Again, Mr. Kim?" She smiled.

"Yes." Yu-Jun said. "Is he in?"

She waved her hand toward the door gesturing for him to enter the office.

"Ah, Yu-Jun." The manager smiled as he walked in.

"Sir I was wondering if you were able to-"

The manager brought his hand up stopping Yu-Jun mid-sentence as he stood up. Yu-Jun was afraid he was going to tell him to stop asking.

"I was able to add three dates to this tour." The manager said, offering Yu-Jun a seat.

What remained of Yu-Jun's heart swelled with hope. "That's great-"

Again his manager cut him off. "Unfortunately, I was unable to add the specific city or even state you were requesting."

His heart deflated slightly.

"We can add more dates there next year but Yu-Jun I know why you're so desperate to visit and I must remind you to think of your contract, not to mention long distance relationships are hard. Also you know we can only offer so many slots for the fansign events. Only one will be in America and it will only have 150 slots. Are you sure you can handle this?"

Yu-jun was caught in no man's land between hope and despair. "I understand sir and I will try my best to deal with whatever the outcome is." He left feeling lighter than he had in years and smiled in spite of the questions that filled his head and the hurt that filled his heart.