19. The Video
Maybe this was a bad idea. No, Zayn was sure it was a bad idea and Louis would feel betrayed but it was the right thing to do. He was fed up with Harry and his irrational behaviour towards Louis, especially because it was so obvious to Zayn that Harry was freaking gone for Louis but was still holding the past against him. A past that he didn't know everything about. Zayn needed to change that to help his best friend. He couldn't stand back and watch his best friend being miserable and broken if it could be different.
That's why he was waiting for Harry, Niall and Liam right now. If he was about to break Louis' trust in him and maybe hurt him in the long run he could show everyone the much-needed truth to make the right decision in a few weeks and not just Harry to show him how stupid he has been and still was.
When his doorbell rang, Zayn jumped on his spot before sprinting over and opening the door to reveal his three friends and ex-bandmates. "Hey, guys".
"Hi, Zayn. What is all this about? You said you needed to see us immediately and it is important. Is something wrong?" Liam came straight to the point, walking into the house.
"Depends on how you look at the situation" Zayn responded in riddles and he knew they didn't get it.
"Which situation?" Niall frowned confused.
"I'm gonna show you in a second but follow me first, please" Zayn lead them into the living room towards the couch and the big TV screen with a paused video on it, showing Jackson's office.
"That's Jackson's office. What is going on, Zayn? Why is ...?".
"By now, all of you know Jackson isn't really a nice person" Zayn cut Liam off, having to get this off his chest right now or he would chicken out. "And we all know Louis left us seven years ago".
"Why does that matter now? We're all over this and understand his reasons. Jackson really went too far and even made him write our songs later although ...".
"And that's it" Zayn interrupted Niall this time. "Sorry, but um ... apparently, not everyone is over the past".
After a first second of confusion, Liam and Niall turned towards Harry, who looked caught and angry and sad all at the same time. "So what? That's none of your business" he snapped.
"But it is when you hurt my best friend over nothing less than a hurt ego and false accusations and assumptions. That's why I wanted you to come over today. I need to show you the truth Louis thinks isn't worth letting you know about because it wouldn't change a thing but I know it will. This video will show all of you something you need to know before making your decision and Louis is too far gone in his own pain to rationally see he did nothing wrong and the truth changes everything" Zayn rushed out in one breath before anyone could stop him.
"Now I'm scared. What is this?" Liam gulped visibly.
"This is it. The moment where Jackson went too far the first time. The night he called Louis into his office alone and Louis never came back to us. Here is why" Zayn revealed to them.
Wordlessly, the other three boys sat down on the sofa while Zayn took the remote and pressed play on the video. For now, it only showed a security camera recording of Jackson sitting at his office desk. But then he picked up his phone to call someone.
"Tomlinson, report to my office. Right now!" Jackson literally growled angrily into the phone and barely waited for a response before he ended the call again. Just from this tiny bit, Zayn could see a reaction on Harry's face.
The video skipped to someone knocking on Jackson's office door and him calling them in. A second later, a young and frightened-looking Louis appeared in the doorframe and stepped inside the room.
"Have a seat, Tomlinson. We need to have a serious conversation" Jackson motioned to the chair in front of his desk.
"Did something happen?" Louis sat down quickly.
"Indeed. A little bird told me you wanted to talk to me about you being gay and your wish of coming out to the public when your single drops. Is that right?" Jackson went right into it in a voice that already sounded belittling.
"Yes. It doesn't have to be a big deal. I just wanna ...".
"But this is a big deal, Louis" Jackson gave him no chance to explain himself. "You're in a boyband. Have you thought about how this could affect your friends instead of thinking about what you want? Being gay is bad for business".
"Why?" Louis frowned obviously hurt.
"Are you serious right now? Use your pretty head for once. The majority of your fans will be girls because you're a boyband. You're all handsome and attractive and mildly talented. They will eat you up and wanna date you. If you come out as gay you destroy that fantasy and they won't buy your music. Even worse, they could think you're not the only gay one in the band and make up wild theories about all of you taking turns backstage, which would be the worst image you could have. This could harm your bandmates only because you wanna be selfish. I don't think you wanna do that" Jackson explained to him what he meant. "While we're at it. I wanted to talk to you about this anyway. I need you to act less gay around your bandmates. My people tell me everything and they say it's pretty obvious that you're not straight from the way you act. So, you need to cut that down. Be more straight to sell albums".
"I don't know what you want from me. I'm simply being me. I can't change who I am" Louis looked down at his shoes.
"But we can. Everyone on our team can help you and train you into coming off as straight and cool. Everyone in the band has a role. You need to accept your role as the dumb but funny one, Louis. Embrace it or people will forget about you because being funny is all you're good at. You realise that you're friends are more talented than you, right? And that's why Harry, Zayn and Liam sing more than you and Niall. There is a reason you sing the least. Have you heard yourself lately? We're doing you a favour here but all you do is complain. Don't think I don't know that. All-day you insist on singing more or writing your own songs or whatever bullshit you come up with. That's pretty big-headed and completely out of place. Your songs are shit and your voice is not even close to mediocre, so stay in line, Tomlinson" Jackson put him down cruelly.
"If I'm that bad why did you sign me?" Louis held back his tears.
"Sadly, you're part of this band and your friends insisted on all five or none. Keeping you around in the background was the tiniest evil. You're handsome and funny. If you focus on that instead of your voice this could work but only if you stop being selfish. If you keep on doing what you're doing you're gonna harm your friends' careers before it even started. You don't want Zayn's dreams to go downhill, do you? Or Harry to get hurt" Jackson smirked evilly.
Immediately, Louis' head shot up and his eyes were huge and he looked terrified. "Why would Harry get hurt?".
"How cute. I had my suspicions before when I saw how close you are but now I'm certain. You're in love with Harry. How tragic" Jackson made fun of Louis' reaction.
"You don't know ...".
"Oh, but I do know, Louis" Jackson gave him no chance to talk. "It's kinda embarrassing how gone you are for Harry. You're so whipped and drawn to him that it hurts me. It's quite funny but also pretty sad and pathetic that you are unable to see that Harry is absolutely straight and not into you. You're wasting your time on something that is pointless. Harry is not gay but you and your pathetic feelings for him make him look gay. You need to stop or it will ruin his image. Don't destroy his life because you love him and can't seem to stop touching him".
"But he is ...".
"No, he is not, Louis" Jackson cut him off pretty harshly. "Harry is naturally touchy with everyone and the girls are gonna love this. That doesn't mean he is into you. Did you seriously think he's feeling the same? I'm sorry to tell you he doesn't. You read the signs wrong, Louis. I don't know which scenario made you think he is into you but this is all in your head. Don't confuse compassion, sympathy or even pity with love".
"It doesn't matter what you think. You're not always around. Even if he isn't into me it doesn't change our bond. We care about each other and l ...".
"If you really care about him you would keep your distance from now on. Do what I tell you, it's not like you have a choice anyway. From today on you have to stay away from him when people are around. Act like normal bandmates and don't act on your feelings. If your future fans see the way you act towards him and find out how you feel about him they'll think Harry is gay too and that would be the end of his career. He could be a big star one day. Do you wanna live with the knowledge that you are at fault for his failure? I don't think so. Don't ruin his career just because you'll never have one" Jackson just didn't stop.
"Staying away will make it only more obvious because he will ask questions. You can't do this. Just let me come out and talk to Harry about this. Then he can decide ...".
"There is no decision for him to make. He can't think clearly when his friends are involved. He is too young to think this far ahead, so I'm doing it for him. I won't let gay rumours ruin my superstar! You will not come out. Never! As soon as the single drops you will get a beard to shut up everyone who even considers questioning your annoying behaviour. And the media will report about beef behind the scenes between you and Harry. Like this, you're ...".
"This is sick!" Louis exclaimed outraged. "I won't do this".
"You really have no say in this, Louis. You signed a contract and your image is my possession, just as everything else. You have to do what I tell you" Jackson grinned smugly down at him. "Or ...".
"Or what?" Louis snapped fed up.
"There was no single release yet and no one knows about you so far. No one knows the actual band members. If you hate all of this so much and you will not listen to my commands then there is only one other option left for you. Leave the band" Jackson presented him with the only solution.
"What? I can't just ...".
"You can and you will if you don't follow my orders. You're too gay for the band and your voice is horrible. The solution for these problems is a beard and barely any parts in your songs and live your mic will be turned down. To stop gay rumours from ruining your friends' careers I will create beef between you guys, starting with Harry and you. Maybe in five years, you could come out through this and tell the world that's why you had beef this whole time and you were done with them and like this, ...".
"I'm done with you" Louis cut him off strongly. "I won't play along with your little games. I'm not doing any of this".
"So, you made your decision then?! You're leaving?" Jackson hooked unimpressed and Louis fell silent for a moment, looking torn and pained and miserable. "It's the best thing you can do. Saves us a lot of trouble fixing your image and coming up with more and more lies. And you don't have to suffer through your crush anymore and face the stone-cold rejection you would get from Harry if you ever told him how you feel. It's better for you, believe me. Trust me on this one".
"I don't trust you, Jackson" Louis spoke up, looking about ready to cry. "But I think you're right. It's better when I leave. I can't be who I am and will only harm my friends because I can't pretend".
"Wise decision, Louis. You're lucky the band hasn't released any promo or music yet. Now we can erase you as if you never existed. We get rid of your contract and you only have to sign an NDA to make sure you tell no one about this conversation or anything else. Especially not the boys. You just leave. No goodbyes" Jackson slid a piece of paper towards him, ready to sign.
"What? But I have to say goodbye. Zayn ...".
"He will know you had your reasons. Best friends since forever, right? He will thank you for this in the future when he is famous and every girl on the planet wants him ...".
"Harry ...".
"No goodbyes, Louis" Jackson lost his patience. "You leave overnight without a word. Without a trace. Leave nothing behind or you won't get it back. You never existed. And never forget, you wanted this instead of taking my advice to become famous. This is on you. Your selfish choice, Louis. Not mine. Yours".
"Mine, yeah" Louis absently signed the NDA before standing up from his chair and walking towards the door. "Make them famous. Successful. Happy. Promise me that".
"I will make their dreams come true no matter the costs" Jackson assured him wickedly. "Now get lost".
And with that, Louis left the room and closed the door behind him. Jackson immediately started laughing like a maniac. "God, I thought he would never get it and leave".
Shocked and pale faces were the only thing Zayn could see when he looked around. Deciding to let them process this first he focused back on the screen where the video abruptly cut to a different scenario. The day after in Jackson's office around midday with himself, Liam, Niall and Harry standing in Louis' place.
"I have some important but devastating news for you, boys" Jackson sighed out dramatically. "Louis left the band".
"What?" Liam, Niall and Harry exclaimed while Zayn stayed silent and only watched Jackson. "Why?".
"I had a talk with him yesterday night. He suddenly came into my office and demanded so many things I couldn't give him. It would have ruined the band but he didn't care. He even admitted that this was his plan all along" Jackson let them know.
"What was his plan? What did he want from you?" Liam hooked.
"He wanted to be the lead singer and put all of you in the background ... although he is the worst out of you and not even that cute or handsome. Especially not with a character like this. I told him this band is all equal but he told me he never cared about the band. He was never serious about it. This step was only a need to an end, a way to get somewhere bigger, alone" Jackson informed them with a sad face.
"I can't believe it. Louis isn't like this. He cares ...".
"No, Harry. He doesn't care about you" Jackson cut him off, making Harry's face drop. "I asked him about you and your friends. You don't wanna know what he told me. It was all just a game. Everything he ever did or said was to get somewhere and make you trust him. He was never honest with any of you. So, forget everything he ever told you or made you believe you feel or should be or do. It was all lies".
A heavy silence fell over them. Liam and Niall looked straight out pissed while Harry looked devastated and broken. Zayn was the only one who was glaring at Jackson but no one seemed to notice that, not even Jackson himself.
"You were all very lucky that he left now after I told him his solo ambitions were out of place. Now you can still release your single without him. We simply cut him out of everything. This isn't very hard because he was never important, unlike his beliefs. We have to move on now, without him. Never mention him. He never existed. Don't let him drag you down and ruin your dream" Jackson advised them when no one seemed to be able to find words.
"Believe me, we won't let him ruin our dream. I will never even waste a single thought about him anymore. Such an asshole" Liam gritted his teeth together.
"I can only agree. He lied to all of us. We don't even know the real him. There is no one we could talk about. We never had another friend in the band" Niall sided with Liam.
"I only want to forget him" Harry murmured quietly.
"Zayn? What about you? You've been friends for so long" Jackson addressed Zayn now carefully.
"Trust me when I tell you you don't wanna know what I'm thinking and you should be happy that I barely talk in general. You won't have to worry about me" Zayn answered provokingly.
"Zayn, what are you on about? Louis just left after he tried to ...".
"I heard him, Liam. No need to repeat his words. Just drop it" Zayn cut him off harshly.
"Don't let this ruin your bond now, boys. Go home and take a moment for yourselves. We see each other tomorrow for the re-recordings" Jackson sent them out of the room friendly.
"How did you even get that video?" Niall croaked out.
"Remember Charles? He was a security guard back in the days and we were pretty close. He was kind of a friend of Louis and me and he ... he heard everything that night and felt so bad for Louis that he wanted me to know the truth. So, he stole the tape and gave it to me. Sometime later Jackson somehow found out about this and fired him. He had to sign many NDAS and other stuff and yeah ..." Zayn let them in on his secret helper.
"Wow, he really risked a lot only to do the right thing" Niall breathed out, obviously still in shock.
"I can't believe Jackson treated him like this. I mean, I know he is horrible and put us through some bullshit but this is next level fucked up. Louis was so young and innocent and naïve and only wanted to be himself. I can't ... and we believed Jackson and shit-talked Louis for years. I'm so sorry and disgusted with myself right now" Liam talked more to himself but everyone heard him.
"You don't have to be. You didn't know better and ...".
"But you did" Niall intervened with big eyes. "You knew what really happened when we were there. That's why you said that to Jackson. Louis told you although he wasn't allowed to".
"Yes, he did but not willingly. I made him tell me. I was waiting in his room for his return after Harry had called me and asked where Louis was when he still hadn't come back as he had promised apparently. So, I went to look for him and simply waited in his room when I couldn't find him. When he came back I could see that something was wrong but he didn't want to talk about it. He just started packing his stuff and told me he was leaving. He was holding back his tears so hard that it almost scared me. Sitting him down and making him talk was the hardest thing I ever had to do but when I mentioned Harry, he just broke down in my arms and let everything out. I was shocked and angry but there was nothing I could do. He had made his decision" Zayn let them know.
"I wish I could turn back time with my present knowledge and do things differently. I would tell Louis that Jackson's mind games were fucked up. It was sick and disgusting how he used his own feelings against him and put him down with everything he could. I've never seen Louis this defeated and I never wanna see that again" Niall balled his hands into fists and breathed heavily.
"I've seen him down quite a few times after this, recently, but there was only one time that was close to this. One moment where he almost looked just as broken as back then. This time it was worse and I didn't think that was possible" Zayn thought out loud, glancing at a silent Harry. Liam and Niall caught that motion and couldn't help but stare at Harry in question.
"Harry?" Liam put his hand on his shoulder.
"I really have to talk to Louis. Right now. God, I was so stupid. He never played with me. Not back then and not now. God, how could I even think that? Gosh, he hates me and for a good reason. I said so many horrible things and really pushed him to the ground again. Why ... I'm so sorry. I ... Jackson really went too far. How could he tell my Louis that I didn't feel the same? He couldn't have known what was going on! We almost kissed and he ruined it. All of it. The moment and the memory of it. All with his horrible lies and games and stunts and ... Urgh, I wanna punch someone but first, I have to find Louis and talk to him. I have to fix this" Harry jumped up from the couch and paced up and down the room nervously, rambling.
"If you really wanna fix this and won't hurt him again I can tell you where he is" Zayn stopped in front of Harry.
"I wanna apologise to him. And to you, but mostly to him. I need to tell him how wrong Jackson was and ... Please, I need him" Harry begged him desperately.
Zayn looked deep into Harry's eyes and could only see desperation and hope but no lies. "He's at the beach".
"Thank you, Zayn" Harry fell into his arms before he stormed off fast as lightning.
"So, there really was something between them that Jackson ruined" Liam stated the obvious.
"Of course. It was so obvious. Still is" Zayn snorted amused.
"Nowadays I can see it. Hopefully, Harry knows what he is doing and is sure he can treat him right" Liam sighed out and scared Zayn with his words.
"What do you mean?" Zayn dared to ask.
"Harry hasn't really accepted his sexuality yet and he was still persistent about signing with Jackson again because in his mind Jackson could make him or break him. And now with seeing how he reacted to Louis being gay and considering how he treated you he will have to make a decision that is bigger than ever before. I'm not sure he is ready for that. I'm not sure he is going to choose the right thing, no matter how much he loves Louis" Liam opened up about his doubts about Harry's intentions.
"I don't think he will even think about signing with Jackson ever again after seeing this. Neither do you, right?" Zayn tried to stay positive.
"After this? Definitely not, even though I'm not sure what to do next. Jackson is out of the options" Liam clarified.
"Yeah, same. And Harry will think exactly like us" Niall was sure of it.
"I hope you're right. I don't want Louis to get hurt all over again in a way we couldn't possibly predict right now".
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There you have it, guys. The long-awaited truth. Thoughts?
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