━━ CHAPTER SEVENTEEN / high standards

The sunlight flooded into the apartment as Ronny woke up from the first peaceful sleep she'd had in days. She rolled over in the bed, rolling right into the body of Steven. A small smile grew on her face and she looked at him. His face was so peaceful and relaxed. The permanent frown lines had eased up slightly.

Whenever she saw Steven, he seemed happy but acutely aware that something wasn't right. Marc was always tense, angry and frustrated. That was partly her fault and she couldn't blame him, not really. He had a stubborn God breathing down his neck just like she did. It was weighing down on him, dragging him down slowly.

Ronny shuffled towards him and she reached out, gently taking a hold of his hand. She brought it closer to her, running her fingertip across the lines on his palms. Gently prodding and poking at his fingertips with a small smile on her face. His hands were calloused but so warm, inviting. She brought it to rest against her face before intertwining their fingers.

She found herself pressing a soft kiss to his knuckle before letting go of his hand completely. The guilt crushing the gentle moment. It was what she would do with her husband all those years ago. He was gone now and she was finding love with someone else.

Thankfully, Steven adjusted and ended up rolling over onto his other side. His back facing her and the guilt didn't feel as overwhelming. She shuffled closer to him, letting her finger trace patterns down his back. Ronny tried not to think about her husband, tried to ignore the gaping hole his death had left in her heart.

She had grieved and cried so many tears for him but for years, since he died, she had never been able to move on. Never been able to find someone who made her feel the same way he did. Now, she had and suddenly every feeling was resurfacing. She didn't realise how long she had been living on autopilot. There was this superficial feeling of emotion but since Steven, it had all come flooding back in a dangerous tsunami.

The guilt was crushing but if it was wrong, she would have left Steven weeks ago. If it was wrong, she wouldn't have spent months flirting with Marc and admiring him from afar. If it was wrong, she wouldn't have done anything she had the past few years. They had talked about what would happen if the other died but never seriously. They both knew that their job could be dangerous. Grave robbers and criminals were something in the peripheral of their lives but they had never considered something could actually happen. She didn't know what her husband would say. Not really. But if it was wrong, it wouldn't feel right. There would be some sign from him that she should stop. But there was nothing. No sign and no warnings.

Ronny sighed and pressed her forehead against Steven's toned back. Her arms wrapped around his waist and she enjoyed the warmth he gave her. Even if she could get over the guilt of her husband, she was still lying to him about Marc and who she was. She didn't even use her real accent around him.

But sleep captured her again before her thoughts could run too wild. She only woke up again when she heard voices. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and moved to sit up, pulling the covers with her. Steven was standing next to one of the tables with an old flip phone pressed to his ear and a key to Marc's storage unit on the side.

This couldn't be good. Steven seemed to have just been hung up on as he lifted the phone away and stared at it in complete confusion. He then closed it and placed it on the side, turning to look at Ronny. She tilted her head slightly.

"I just found these and this woman, Layla, was calling me Marc?" Steven said as he walked over to the brunette. She stared at him, baffled and unsure how to even respond to that. She couldn't say anything about Marc. She didn't think she could. Marc would force his way to the front if she did so she just took his hand and pulled him back onto the bed.

"I'm sure it's just an old tenant," Ronny suggested as she shuffled back so he could rest against her front. His head on her chest as she held him closely, burying her face in her hair. She was wearing his t-shirt and cuddling him and she felt the guilt creep in again.

"Maybe, yeah," He mumbled. He then sat up slightly and looked up at her, watching her face before he sat up properly, "I know you don't mean to be... but you're confusing me, love." He fumbled over his words as he looked away from her. Ronny nodded, she was confusing herself too.

"I'm sorry." She glanced at the clock. Steven had to go to work soon but he seemed to have forgotten about that small detail, "If you don't want to see me, just tell me." It was the exact same sentiment that she had conveyed to Marc but he hadn't said a word. Everytime she brought it up, he switched topics and avoided the question.

"I want to see you." He was firm in his response and Ronny nodded. She stared down at him and smiled slightly. Steven glanced at the clock and pulled himself out of bed, reluctantly, "I gotta head out to work soon, You can stay, though. I have a spare key I can give to you, if you need it."

"I'll leave when you do." Her words were gentle and she watched as Steven walked over to the kitchen. He picked up the fish food and poured some into Gus' tank with slight hesitation. Ronny hadn't noticed until that moment but Gus had grown his fin. The real Gus must have died while he was away. Just another suspicion for Steven to use to work out something was wrong.

"Do you want breakfast?" He asked as he placed the fish food down. Ronny shook her head and he glanced back at her. This moment was perfect. A sweet, wonderful man, the early morning sun, a cluttered apartment and just the two of them in their own little corner of the universe. She wanted to capture this moment so she could relive it for eternity but it wasn't really that pretty. Just another facade that would eventually break.

Steven put some toast into the toaster before he glanced back at Ronny. She was sitting with the covers back, her legs crossed in front of her as she just watched him. He gave her an awkward half-smile and it was that little look that spurred her to stand up. She walked over to him and grabbed his arm, spinning him around.

Before he could ask what she was doing, her lips were on his. It was a soft, short kiss and she stepped back, pushing her hair out of her face. That was definitely confusing. She felt her face heat up as she glanced back before she looked back at him. It felt right. So right. The guilt had dissipated slightly as she looked up into Steven's eyes. Surely, her husband would forgive her for moving on. He wanted her to be happy.

"Ronny." His voice was soft as he stepped towards her again. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pressed another kiss to his lips, a soft peck. Her forehead rested against his and their breaths mingled together.

"I want this," She said, answering the unspoken question. Steven knew about Layla, Marc was leaving breadcrumb. Maybe, she wouldn't have to lie to him as much as she believed. His life was unravelling and Ronny wanted to be there with him, for him. Steven stared at her for a few seconds, just admiring her before he kissed her this time.

His movements were cautious and unsure, inexperienced but Ronny led him along. Her fingers ran through his hair before they pulled back, panting softly. The kisses were nothing like she had expected but she was beginning to realise that she had always imagined kisses with Marc. He was rough and harsh and passionate. Steven was the opposite.

"Sorry about the morning breath," She chuckled softly. Steven just stared at her in complete awe, "A mint probably would have made that more pleasant." Her words were tinged with nervousness but Steven shook his head.

"It's okay."

-

"You did what?!" Ronny had expected Kaylea to scream the house down about it but that didn't make it any easier to tolerate. She winced at the shrill cry and waved her hand frantically, telling her to effectively 'shut the fuck up'. Kaylea glared before she pushed another set of books onto the shelf. They were in the fantasy section that day, "I thought the day would never come," Kaylea's teasing would be unrelenting but Ronny didn't care. She was happy.

"You're acting like I've never snogged someone before." Ronny rolled her eyes at her friend's dramatics and passed her another stack of books over. Kaylea continued to slot them into place as the smirk grew on her face.

"You have?" She teased. Ronny restrained herself from kicking the blonde.

"Of course I have, I've had boyfriends!" Ronny responded, almost too defensively. The guilt over her husband seeped in again but she shook it off. It was better to lie to Kaylea than tell her the truth. It would put her in danger if she knew the truth.

"When?" Kaylea asked as she finished putting the books in. She got up and pulled the trolley behind her as they headed to the next aisle.

"Years ago," Ronny attempted to dismiss the topic of conversation. But it was as clear as day that Kaylea didn't believe her in the slightest.

A soft "Mhm," was all the response that Kaylea gave and there was a look on her face that portrayed her complete disbelief. Ronny glanced around and punched the blonde playfully on the arm.

"Don't give me that look, you twat." She lowered her voice to avoid any attention being drawn. Kaylea chuckled softly and came to a stop on the next aisle. She grabbed a stack of books and began to fill in the gaps again.

"I'm just surprised, that's all. You've never talked about a boyfriend before," Kaylea defended and Ronny nodded her head. It was true. The topic of boyfriend had never really come up. Not until Steven but even then, she kept the details under wraps. It was easier that way. Kaylea then came to a stop and turned to look at Ronny, "Wait, was he a privileged knobhead?"

Ronny gave her an unimpressed look in response and Kaylea went back to her stacking, "No. I have standards." Ronny's words were blunt and Kaylea nodded, pulling the trolley further along to fill in some of the other spaces.

"Oh, I know." Her words were quiet, a mumble but Ronny heard them and glared playfully.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" She asked. Kaylea flicked through the book she had picked up before she put it back on the shelf. Ronny leant against the shelf a few centimetres away, cocking an eyebrow as she waited.

"Your standards for making out with people are far too high. I don't think I've ever seen you get off with someone at a club," Kaylea said simply. Ronny tilted her head slightly before she looked away from Kaylea completely.

"They're all sweaty men. Why would I want to go near them?" She responded, her voice low as she pushed off of the shelf. She then began to wander down the aisle, her fingers running across the spines of the romance books. Contemporary romances with either cringy picture covers or beautifully illustrated covers. Ronny had never understood the appeal of romances but she didn't understand the appeal of fiction at all, really.

"You nearly got with Sam," Kaylea reminded after a few beats of silence. Ronny pulled a book out of the shelf and flicked through. She stopped on a random page and glanced over it before she closed the book and placed it back on the shelf.

"But I didn't." Ronny shrugged and Kaylea hummed in agreement. She pulled the trolley further down the aisle and began to replace some of the worst selling books with the better selling and sold out books.

"What even happened with her?" Kaylea asked curiously, looking up at the brunette. The brief hurt crossed her face but Ronny disguised it quickly.

"We just had a disagreement over something. It just didn't work out." Ronny had become an exceptional liar over her life but Kaylea also knew when to drop a topic of conversation so she nodded her head and continued with her work. They were silent for a little while before Kaylea spoke up again.

"Are we meeting later?" She asked. Ronny's face brightened at the question and nodded her head.

"Yeah. Do you wanna go to that Italian place?" Kaylea nodded in response and watched as Ronny adjusted the bag over her shoulder. She was getting ready to leave, "I'm paying. We can go out afterwards too. The club or pub, wherever," Ronny added after a moment. Kaylea's face brightened more and she nodded.

"You're an angel," Kaylea said as she pulled out another stack of books. Ronny then said that she needed to go home for a bit. She had a couple of chores to finish. Kaylea nodded and waved her off, "Laters."

"I'll text you the time to meet. See ya."

-

NOTE; so... that happened, also slowly getting further into the moonknight plot, we are gonna be thrown right in soon and it's gonna be fun!!