Dylan considered what to do with Katie's phone number, and with the knowledge that she had a new daughter.

Holding his cell phone in his hand, he squeezed, remembering the time when he and Katie had been young parents, when he'd thought that's how his life would be: him, her, and Talia, living mostly happily ever after.

Now, hearing Talia's voice from her bedroom, he pondered their life together: just him and her. Talia didn't even remember who Katie was. Katie had abandoned them, first for heroin, then for Connor Walsch. Though Dylan didn't do social media, he'd looked up Katie's account on his phone as soon as he'd gotten home, and was only more upset to find her with a familiar face, some guy he'd gone to high school with, some guy who he was now intimately connected with, some guy whose daughter was his daughter's half-sister.

In his hand, his phone started buzzing, and he saw Leah's name on the screen. He'd been waiting for her call since their awkward conversation at his work, but now that she was finally calling, he didn't answer. When she called again, he hit ignore. He couldn't talk to her right now.

Though he'd made a new year's resolution to drink less, he found himself going to the fridge and opening a beer. Drinking it made him feel a little better, so he had another.

Nine o' clock had come and gone, so he told Talia to brush her teeth and put on her pajamas, before putting her to bed.

When he returned to the living room, he found two text messages from Leah, but he only glanced at them briefly before taking the crumpled-up sticky note out of his pocket and dialing Katie's number on his phone.

After three rings, someone answered. "Hello?" The voice unmistakably belonged to her. Perhaps she sounded older, but the voice contained the tell-tale qualities of Katie: deep, slightly scratchy, slightly languid. The single word—hello—had such an impact on him.

"Katie?"

"Dylan, is that you?" Her voice sounded strained, like she was trying to not cry, and it made him feel like crying.

"It's me," he managed, trying to keep his voice steady.

"Oh my God. I thought you weren't going to call." Now she cried, and he felt his own eyes welling up. "I'm so grateful that you did. How...how are you?"

"How the fuck do you think I am?" He hadn't wanted to get so angry so quickly, but now that he actually had the opportunity, he couldn't help himself. "I just found out that not only are you alive, but you also have another daughter. That you're happy. With someone else."

"I'm so sorry, Dylan. There aren't enough words for how sorry I am."

Their conversation had only been a few sentences long, but it felt like it was going in slow motion, punctuated by silent sobs and gasps for air. It was the kind of conversation that should never take place over a phone call, yet here they were.

"What do you want?" He thought of how happy she presented herself as being on social media. "If you're so happy, then what do you want with us?"

"I want you back in my life."

"You mean you want Talia back in your life."

"If you will let me."

He paused, holding his head up with his hands, his cellphone crushing his ear. Gravity seemed much stronger, like it would pull him down to the floor and trap him there. "You abandoned us, Katie. I spent the last year thinking you were dead."

"You could have been right. I almost died. I overdosed."

Dylan said nothing. He'd mourned Katie for too long already; she didn't deserve any more of his pity.

"I wish I'd never abandoned you. That person, whoever she was, that isn't me anymore. I hate her, but she's in my past. She really did die on that day I OD'd." Silence lingered between them, before she spoke again. "I'm sorry that my happiness hurts you, but I'm not sorry I found new happiness. I can't be sorry about it. I have another daughter, Dylan, and I could never regret her. I love her so, so much. Just like I love Talia."

Still, Dylan said nothing.

"Will you please say something?"

"I need to think about this," Dylan said, right before hanging up.

Katie didn't call back. She wasn't that kind of person; she knew how to give someone space.

Leah called him twice more, but he left his phone on the counter, unanswered, and went to bed.

*

The next morning, when Dylan got to work, he finally texted Leah back, telling her he was sorry for not answering, that he'd had a rough night, and that he'd love to have her over for dinner.

She and Trigger arrived that evening, and right away, Trigger ran up to Talia and hugged her. "I'm torry about hitting you, Talia."

Talia nodded and hugged him back, and Dylan went over and patted Trigger on the back. "Thanks, buddy," he said, and he meant it.

Trigger looked up at him with his wide eyes. "Tanks for my present. I won't use it to shoot people in their eye anymore."

"That's a good idea. High five?"

Trigger tried to give Dylan a high five, but Dylan pulled his hand away at the last minute. "Too slow!"

Trigger burst into laughter and attempted the trick on Talia, who fell for it. The two of them ran into Talia's room to continue playing.

Dylan went to the kitchen to prepare dinner: burgers and oven fries with soda. He imagined Ellie gasping at his choice to give Talia soda. He could clearly hear her say, "What the fuck, Dylan?" and he could see her backing away from him, and he felt a new wave of regret for trying to kiss her, made worse by Leah's presence in the background. Why the fuck had he done that? Had he been happy with Leah before their fight? Could he be happy with her?

He looked over at her where she sat on a barstool, and she smiled at him. He tried to smile back, but his smile felt forced, and he wasn't sure if guilt or unhappiness should be blamed, but one thing was certain: he did not feel at ease.

As soon as dinner finished cooking, Leah poured ketchup onto the kids' plates, and they sat at the counter to eat. Dylan and Leah sat down on the couch, using the coffee table to dine.

After the kids cleared their plates, they went into Talia's room, and he and Leah were left alone.

"I'm sorry about Christmas," Leah said. "I feel like things have been weird between us ever since that day. I mean, this is only the second time I've seen you, and we haven't had any sleepovers."

"It's fine. I already told you, the doctor said Talia's vision's fine. It was an accident." The words were sincere, but still, Dylan felt like something was amiss. "It was nice of Trigger to apologize. How is he, anyway? I heard my little brother punched him."

"Yeah." Leah put her mouth into a straight line. "Maybe Ellie shouldn't be so judgmental about my son when her son punches other kids, too."

"Well, that's just Ellie."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean she's judgmental, slightly hypocritical. But underneath, she's a good person."

Leah frowned. "Sure she is."

Dylan felt himself frowning. "She is."

Leah's eyebrows moved upward, an expression indicating she did not agree, that she felt frustrated with his insistence that Ellie was a good person, but she let it slip, relaxing her face and changing the subject. "Why did you have a rough day yesterday?"

Dylan took a breath before speaking. "Ellie told me that Katie contacted her."

Leah took a moment, maybe to remember who Katie was. "She's not dead?"

"No. She's alive and well. I talked to her yesterday."

Leah frowned slightly. "How did that go?"

"She wants to see Talia."

"You're not going to let her, right?"

"I mean, she's Talia's mom. I can't really keep Talia away from her, not if she wants to be in her life."

"I keep Trigger away from Larry."

"That's different."

"Is it?"

"Well, yeah." Dylan's tone probably sounded too condescending, but he couldn't help himself, because wasn't it obvious that their situations were completely different? "Katie left us. Larry physically abused you. That's a big difference." He couldn't even believe she was comparing their situations.

"I don't think it makes all that much difference. She was a shitty mom, and she doesn't deserve to see Talia."

For some reason, Dylan found himself feeling very defensive. He'd only ever talked to Leah about Katie twice, and she seemed to think she was now an expert on their affairs, that she had the right to call Katie a "shitty mom."

"Katie wasn't a shitty mom. When she wasn't using, she was a perfect mom."

Leah's eyes turned dangerous, her tone angry. "A perfect mom. Not like me. You're still judging me for trying to punish my son, aren't you?"

Dylan put his hand to his head, because he couldn't believe their dialogue had unfolded like this. "Please, Leah, this isn't about you, this is about me letting Katie see Talia." But maybe it was about Leah. Maybe Leah had transformed from good mom to bad mom in Dylan's mind, and all because of the spanking incident. He'd tried to avoid the topic, but somehow, they had been drawn back to it. "Talia is my daughter. I will decide what's best for her." It was the same line she'd delivered to him.

Leah said nothing, but her actions turned hostile. She appeared to be fuming as she slammed her and Trigger's dishes into the sink, and she didn't offer to help with cleanup.

When Dylan didn't respond to her theatrics, she told him, "I think Trigger and I are gonna go home."

"Cool," Dylan said, feeling relieved and avoiding looking Leah in the eye.

"Are you serious? That's all you have to say to me?"

"What do you want me to say, Leah?"

"What do you want to say?"

He thought about what he really wanted to say to her. "I think we should take a break."

After inhaling sharply, she asked, "What does that mean?"

"We should take a break from seeing each other."

"Is this because of what Trigger did to Talia? Is this because I told you about his SPD?"

"No. Trigger is just a little kid. He's blameless. This is about you and me."

"I thought you were starting to love me."

"I thought so, too."

"Then what changed?"

He finally looked her in the eye. "You really want to know?"

"Yeah. I do."

"I tried to kiss Ellie."

It took a moment, but tears began to well in Leah's eyes. "What do you mean?" Her voice was a whisper.

"I've never told you this, but—" he paused here, unsure how to word it. Then, resigned to the truth, he spilled. "I'm in love with Ellie. I have been for a while. It'll never happen, but I find myself wondering why I never told you, especially if I truly thought we had a future together. It makes me think I never actually thought we had a future together. And I'm sorry about that. I'm an asshole."

Leah wiped her eyes with her fingers, and without saying another word or even looking at Dylan, she fetched Trigger from Talia's room and went out the apartment door, accentuating her anger by making as much noise as she could. Trigger did not want to leave, and he protested the entire way out of the door, screaming about how he wanted to play with Talia, but Leah dragged him by his right hand.

Dylan wished he felt worse about the whole scenario, about hurting her, but for some reason, he didn't feel as bad as he'd thought he would. Even seeing her cry hadn't tugged at his guilt all that much. He felt sorrier for Trigger, who had looked at him pleadingly as he was being forced out the door. Dylan waved goodbye to him.

Picking up his phone, he called Katie.

"Dylan?"

He skipped the formalities. "You can see Talia. But I'm not driving all the way to Tempe."

"Thank you, thank you." She was definitely happy crying. "Do you want us to come to Mountain Springs?"

He didn't want to force them to drive seven to eight hours with an infant or to spend money on a motel. "What if we make it fair to us both, and meet halfway?"

"Sounds like a plan."

When Dylan got off the phone, he found Talia walking towards him, looking inquisitive. "Who was that, Daddy?"

"That was your mommy. She wants to see you."

She looked confused. "My mommy?"

He pulled her in for a hug. "Yeah. Your mommy. And guess what?"

"What?"

"You have a baby sister. You're going to meet her."

Talia jumped up and down despite his tight embrace, and even though he felt sad and jealous and confused, her happiness brought him up.