Crimson

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I slammed the door shut behind me and leaned against it. My already messed up mind was now filled with yet another thing to feel lost about.

I wasn't sure Lamech had realized what he had done. Somehow I doubted it had been a conscious decision. But he had bent his head and exposed his neck.

It was just such a complete shock to see him do it at all. The Midnight Refugees were the most powerful vampire clan and as their leader Lamech was the most powerful vampire in the whole damn world. He didn't have to show submission to anyone, but had shown submission to me.

My shock over that was, however, quickly overtaken by the anger I felt over that he had rejected my advances. He hadn't had any qualms about drinking my blood before, but when I asked for it, he refused. It had me in a fury, because the alternative was to feel the hurt that was actually there. And he had told me he would do anything to make it easier, but then said no to the one thing I had asked of him! He was selfish and a liar and the fact that his scent still lingered all around me made it impossible to hate him like I wanted to.

I put my hands over my face and tried to block it all out. But that just made the scent of him even stronger so I quickly put my hands down.

My eyes landed on my fingers and widened.

Blood. There was blood on there.

I moved my fingers to my nose and smelled them. Chamomile tea, thunder, and freshly baked bread engulfed me. It smelled so lovely that I flicked out my tongue and licked my fingers before I could think. The taste exploded in my mouth and was as amazing as the scent. It made a moan leave my lips. I almost licked again when I stopped.

What the fuck was wrong with me? Had I been there for too long so that the vampires had started to infect me? It was blood! So why in the name of the Goddess did it smell so delicious and why did I want nothing more than to lick it all up?

It had to be because he was my mate, I decided. He was my mate and a vampire and their mating process did require me to drink his blood. Yeah, that had to be it!

With that thought, I rushed into the bathroom and started washing it away.

I washed my hands over and over with the soap that smelled of citrus. I kept washing them even after the blood was long gone, because the scent lingered. I needed it to disappear to be able to think at least somewhat clearly. With his scent there, all I could think about was that I wanted to go back to him, have him pressed against me, locked together and just get lost in him. I wanted to know nothing but him.

And I really did want him to bite me. Penetrate my skin and drink my blood. I wanted to feel that all-consuming pleasure it caused.

Penetrate skin...

I pulled my hands from under the water and just stared at them.

How had his blood ended up on my hands?

Everything was fussy. I had been too focused on that desperate need for him that I hadn't paid attention to much else. My hands had been in his hair to hold him close. Had I pressed down on his skin? Had my nails scratched a wound open?

I let out a shaky laughter at the idea. It was ridiculous and absolutely impossible. Basically nothing could make a vampire bleed, their skin was too hard. Other vampires could of course, and shifters' claws and canines. I assumed dragons and sphynxes and similar could as well. But I couldn't, no witch could. That was why I always carried iron knifes and wooden stakes when hunting vampires, because they could.

So something else must have happened. I refused to believe that I had been able to make him bleed with only my nails. Impossible, that was what it was. Completely and utterly impossible.

I looked up and into the mirror. My eyes were red and puffy from crying and my hair looked like a bird's nest. My skin was pale and I almost looked a bit sickly. Then I looked down on my body. I had kept on getting clothes to wear from Aideen, but none of them had been what I usually wore. It was all white and flowery and girly. I really didn't feel like myself.

I got out of the clothes and into the shower. Hoped that the water would wash away more than sweat and dirt from my body. When I was out of it and had dried myself, I summoned some of my favorite clothes from my wardrobe at home. A pair of long, tight, black pants and a black crop top.

When I was dressed and back in front of the mirror, I first mumbled a spell to make the puffiness of my eyes disappear, then one to add make-up to my face. In an instance I had smokey-eye make-up and black lipstick. I then combed my hair and dried it, so it became smooth and full of volume.

Lastly, I looked down on my hands. The blood was gone, but I could still see it on my fingers in my mind. To replace it with something else, I painted my nails black.

Feeling slightly better by looking more like myself, I left the bathroom. The issue was that my mind was still a mess and I wanted some peace a quiet.

I took a pen and paper, scribbled a request on it and then sent it by magic to Saida. I waited a few minutes and then prayed that she was at home and had put a sleeping draught on the kitchen table as I requested. I mumbled a spell and knew she had. The little bottle appeared in my hand and I could finally escape from everything and into sleep.

On the bottle though, a note was attached. I took it off and read.

Where are you? How are you? When are you coming back? I'm worried.

I felt a pang of guilt over how I knew Saida had to be feeling. But I couldn't tell her the truth. It just was impossible. But I did write a new note on the paper and sent it to her.

I'm fine. Don't worry.

Once all of that was done, I opened the bottle. I knew that it was strong and that the whole amount would have me passed out for a long time. But that just felt welcoming so I drank until it was empty.

As I laid down in bed and felt myself drifting to sleep, I hoped beyond hope that I would wake up and that everything that had happened would turn out to have been a long and very realistic dream.

I had no idea for how long I slept, but it was a calm and peaceful sleep. Free from dreams and worries. I felt fresh, though still somewhat asleep when I was woken up by movement and voices outside my door.