Zoe

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Alex left after the pie. Felix insisted I stayed in the living room and relaxed while he did the final cleaning up. Having nothing really to do, I walked around the room to look closer at things. There wasn't much to look at, however. No real decoration or anything. The only thing of interest was a painting of Jesus on the cross, but that didn't hold my attention for too long.

Just as I went to sit back down on the couch, Felix returned. He had his hands in his pockets and looked hesitant about something.

"You know Alex was exaggerating, right?" he said. "It's okay if you don't like the movie."

"But it is your favorite movie, right? I'm sure I will like it. And besides, I have no movie to compare it to. So stop worrying and put it on."

He readily agreed and then settled on the couch next to me after having turned the movie on. I started with making sure that there was a proper amount of space between us, but Felix wouldn't have that. To my surprise, though, he laid down on the couch and placed his head on my lap. I felt awkward to start with, but soon I absentmindedly played with his hair while being completely absorbed by the screen.

I really did like the movie. How much of that was due to it being the first movie I ever watched, I didn't know. But I got sucked into it straight away. It was fascinating with the whole concept of a movie, of the moving pictures and sounds, and it all seemed so realistic even though travelling in space like they did obviously wasn't possible.

"So?" he asked as soon as the movie was over and sat back up again.

"I loved it," I answered with a big smile.

"You're not just saying that?" he frowned.

"Did it seem like I didn't enjoy it?" I laughed.

"There are more movies in the story that we can watch." His excitement was all over him and reminding me of an overly enthusiastic puppy.

"Sure, but maybe some other time. Can we go outside for a bit? I liked the movie but sitting still like makes me sleepy."

"Of course."

We went out to their garden that definitely wasn't a garden. From the inside of it, it became even clearer that the fence around the property stopped the forest to even move an inch closer to the house.

"Why is there nothing growing in the garden? Or even a bench or something to sit on?" I asked as I looked around.

Felix shrugged. "I don't know. It's always been like this. Bare and empty. You want to get out and into the forest?"

I nodded, and we left. We didn't go deep into the forest before walking in the direction of the city. There were a few birds singing, and it smelled fresh and alive.

"It smells just like you," I said as we walked.

"What do you mean?" he asked behind me.

"You smell like the forest to me."

"The forest, really?"

"Yeah. Just like your eyes look like grass, you smell like the forest, like nature. The best thing on this earth."

We walked a bit further in silence. Three squirrels ran on the trees. A butterfly passed through. A hedgehog disappeared into a bush. So full of life and wonders.

"You smell like strawberry," Felix suddenly said. "I never thought about it before, but you smell like strawberry and chocolate and sugar."

"Really?" I laughed.

"Yeah. You smell sweet, just like you are."

I stopped and turned to look at him. His voice had been deep and carried a trace of something I wasn't sure what it was. When I looked at him, though, his eyes had a similar hunger as they had had during the concert. Just not as pronounced.

"Can you stand still for a moment?" he asked me and stepped closer. He put a hand around my waist and the other on my cheek. He had gotten into the habit of wearing the leather gloves, but I still tried to pull away from his touch.

"What are you..." I started, but he interrupted me.

"I won't do anything I shouldn't. We won't touch. Just... Just please stay still. Just for a moment."

I swallowed, uncertain if my heart was beating fast because of excitement or fear from his proximity. Finally, I nodded.

A soft smile spread over his lips, and he moved in even closer. I was frozen to the spot and resisted the urge to pull away.

Having him so close, all I could see was him. His green eyes that looked more like moss than grass at that moment. The scent of nature filled my nostrils even more, and I admired his handsome face. The sharp features and his lips that looked all too inviting.

"Imagine that we are touching," he whispered, and his words made me close my eyes. I felt his grip on me tighten ever so slightly as I did, and my hands went to rest on his upper arms. I felt his muscles under the clothes and I wanted him to hug me hard to him.

"That I'm leaning in and not stopping. That I'm pressing my lips to yours."

I parted my lips a little to make it easier to breathe. My breaths came out shakingly and I could feel the heat from his skin on mine. Felt his words caress me as he spoke.

"Imagine that I'm kissing you," he continued. "Gently but passionate."

My body tingled, and I started to feel an unfamiliar ache between my legs, an ache that I instinctively knew only Felix could help me with.

"Kissing your cheek, your jaw, down your neck and to your shoulder."

I could feel him slightly move his head as he spoke, and when he finished, I felt him press his lips to my shoulder. A low gasp escaped my lips. Both because it was sudden, but also because the action sent shivers through my body.

"Taking off your clothes so I can kiss your bare skin, taste your whole body," he whispered right by my ear.

I wanted to scream yes. Wanted him to do exactly that and more. Wanted him to touch me and get as close as was possible.

But I held back my words and also felt him move away from me.

I stayed still, with my eyes closed, a long while. Let my breathing and heart calm down before I opened my eyes again.

Felix leaned against a tree with his back to me, but I could still see that his whole body was tense.

"Felix?"

"I'm sorry," he said breathlessly. "I just... I know I shouldn't have done that."

I went up to him and hugged him from behind, leaned my head on his back. I could feel his heart beating fast, or it was my heart that still was out of control.

"Don't say sorry. I want all of that," I whispered to him. "We just..."

"Can't. I know."

We stood like that a moment longer before he turned and smiled at me. His eyes seemed to have cleared again, but there was a forcedness to his smile that told me he still struggled to remain in control.

"Want to continue walking a bit more?"

I nodded, and we walked further into the forest. It didn't feel as peaceful anymore, though. There was a tension between us. Not really a bad tension, just a tension. It made me uncomfortable, however, and I wanted nothing more than for it to go away.

After a while, we got to a clearing and my eyes landed on a tree that looked perfect to climb on.

Seeing my opportunity to make the tension disappear, I yelled, "Last one to the top loses," and started running towards the tree.

I was probably halfway up before Felix even reacted to what I had said.

"Cheater!" he yelled below me. There was amusement in his voice and I was happy that the tension seemed gone.

I stopped climbing to let him catch up. The tree wasn't high enough, so it wasn't possible to see anything but the nature around, but it was still high enough to make me feel free from everything.

"I wish every day could be like today," I told him.

"I'll do my best to make that happen," he answered.

I felt warm. I felt happy. I felt alive.

"I had given up on ever finding joy in life before I meet you," I confessed. "Now life looks much more beautiful."

"I'll always be there for you, Zoe. No matter what happens, I'll always be there and help you see all things beautiful if you need it," he said with a gentle smile and cupped my cheek.

"Thank you."

I gave him a smile before I looked up and started trying to get further up. One more branch, two more, three. I was almost at the top when I felt a sharp pain that turned everything warm cold, all happiness into despair. A pain that killed everything alive.