I Get Taxied And Traumatized

Hugging Chiron feels a lot like hugging a parent before going away to college. It makes sense, I just turned 19 and luckily there aren't any monsters beckoning for me with a smile and open arms past the Golden Fleece.

"You're going on to extraordinary things," He tells me proudly. I had begged him not to do a formal ceremony for transferring me. The only thing worse than everyone skipping would be everyone being there and hating me more for forcing them.

"Thank you for everything, Chiron," I say, shouldering my backpack nervously. "So... what's the plan here? How am I going to know where Camp Jupiter is?"

Dionysus smirks. "You could ask Venus for help. Maybe she'll grow you a trail of roses."

I roll my eyes, not bothering to answer and glance over toward the cabins one last time. Unbelievably, someone is sprinting over.

Chris is panting a bit when he finally reaches us but he pulls me into a hug, my first and last hug from a camper at Camp Half-blood. "Hey, I just wanted to say goodbye. I know we never really talked but I think you'll be a lot happier at Camp Jupiter. I have a few friends there." He smiles at me and I must look completely shell shocked because he blushes in embarrassment. "Sorry, I just thought it'd be nice."

"No, no," I assure him quickly. "I just uhm, wasn't expecting anyone to care."

Chris rocks back and forth on his feet, nodding awkwardly. "Yeah... Aphrodite kids tend to go with the pack, but I care enough not to this time." He grins and taps my shoulder playfully. "Be safe. Get lost, little brother."

He jogs off and I take a deep breath to try and keep myself from whooping and hollering. This tiniest glimmer of happiness feels so massive to me right now.

Chiron watches me with sad eyes I can feel and Mr. D pats my back. "He's right, you have a long journey ahead."

The serious tone makes me set my jaw and dig into my pockets. 10 Drachmas (Greek currency) doesn't seem like enough to me but I nod and start my trek down the hill towards the road. I swear to myself I won't look back over and over, and I almost don't.

But... Camp Half-blood has been my home for almost two straight years now. Even throughout all of the misery, the camp itself had been good to me. I was never uncomfortable physically or sick for very long. It had sheltered and protected me in my father's place, so I turn to say goodbye one last time.

Chiron is the only one still watching, and even from at the bottom of the hill I can tell he's disturbed at the sight of me leaving alone. When he sees me look he waves silently, and I return it.

Road 3.141 winds around the hill and out of sight. Lush, rolling hills filled with green and gold surround me and I take the time to recognize how beautiful it all is. Behind me, Camp Half-blood is out of sight too. The Mist must be enough to shield even my eyes from it from this distance.

I feel like I'm naked in the tundra. It doesn't smell like bonfire smoke and food out here, it smells like danger. Well, really it smells like grass and exhaust, but that's almost the same thing in my mind. I keep expecting to hear a roar or hissing as I drop two drachmas and murmur, "Stêthi 'Ô hárma diabolês." My pronunciation is clumsy and I haven't the foggiest idea what it means save for knowing "diablo" probably means "devil".

I assume that can't be good.

The second I speak the words to the road, thick tendrils of grey smoke begin to seep up from the ground. There are no cracks that I can see it coming from, but it starts to morph into a taxi shaped vehicle. That means I've succeeded, but it sure doesn't seem that way the second I see who's driving.

She's sickly, grey and wrinkled, and there are two more of her in the front with her.

"Temptest, I'm not giving you back the eye until you stop your complaining! I'm driving!"

"Shut up, Anger! Shut up! I'll rip it out of your head, I swear it!"

My stomach churns and boils as they argue. I hate fighting with a passion, and I hate hate. Seeing people mad at each other breaks my heart into pieces, but I'm so scared I can't move anything, much less my mouth.

The one closest to my side leans out and leers at me. "Come on then, boy! Did you just pay us to idle?!"

"No, Ma'am," I reply quickly, taking a shaky step towards the back door. It crosses my mind multiple times that I'm about to be in for a wild ride with these three driving, but at least the one with the eye has the wheel. "I'm trying to get to Camp Jupiter."

"Well we can't take you there, but we can take you to Manhattan!" Anger screeches loudly.

"Didja hear that, you buffoons?" The one closest to me cries. "He called me 'Ma'am'! Ha!"

Anger and Tempest bellow in laughter as I slip into the backseat. I'm kind of hungry and need something to focus on, so I dig out a granola bar. They are seriously screaming at the top of their lungs in this very tiny cab. My heart hurts for them a little more than my ears do. I'm not sure family members who loved each other would be this terrible to one another.

"'Ma'am'! He must be blind too, Wasp!" Anger laughs and slams her foot on the gas.

I am not, and could never have ever been prepared for what I go through in that taxi.

It lurches from zero to six million miles an hour in seconds and my back is practically fused against the seat as we veer wildly back and forth across the road. I can't even move my head, my neck is rigid with fear and whiplash.

"Stop it!" Temptest whines. "Stop it! It's my turn, I want the eye, Anger!"

Wasp grabs it to my ultimate horror and pops it in. The driver is now blind. "Drive, you old bat!"

I barely have enough of sound mind to fasten my seatbelt. My granola bar falls to the floor and I'm more glad than ever that I didn't eat much this morning or even that. The world outside is blurring so fast I can't even look out the window to combat the intense carsickness that's wracking through my body. There's a tiny little handle I wedge my large fingers into and hold on for dear life, which I'm sure is about to end in around five seconds.

I wonder if monsters like demigod slushies.

In the horizon I can see the city of Manhattan, the original home of Percy Jackson. That does not make me feel any safer, and I wonder if he's ever had to deal with these three. Their screaming about hating being sisters is driving me so nuts I can't even begin to think about next steps. "Stop fighting and just be nice to each other!"

It goes silent for a split second and they all (yes, including the driver) turn to look back at me.

"M-maybe you guys could take turns?" I suggest weakly, trying to keep my stomach from flying out of my mouth. "Make a schedule, maybe?"

Wasp takes the eyeball out and hands it to her sister. I almost gag at the wet shlop sound it makes but I know if I do, every organ I have will come out along with the stomach bile. "Fine, take it! See if I care!"

It's enough to make me smile even though I'm sure they'll boot me out when I puke all over their car. "That was very kind of you!" I have to yell to be heard over time and space bending for us and the horrible sound it makes. "Good job!"

In a matter of seconds we are right dead center in Manhattan and the car jerks violently to a stop. I jiggle the door handle less than gracefully, muttering frantically, "Get me the heck out of here."

"Good luck on your quest, son of Venus!" Anger shouts to me as I tumble out.

The car speeds off and dematerializes back into smoke. I haven't a clue how that possibly could make any sense, but I've got bigger problems.

If you've never been to Manhattan, allow me to explain it to you: Imagine being a sardine packed painfully tight into a boiling hot metal tin, add the stale smell of hot food and pungent exhaust mixed with mystery sludge and cars honking constantly and you're right on track.

Everywhere I turn I'm caged in by buildings and people toss me around in the crowd like I'm not taller than all of the ones I can see. I at least know where I need to get to next, I need to find a train heading to the Amtrak station but I have no idea where to go.

"Excuse me?" I mutter to a woman passing by. I assume I don't look intimidating with my pink shirt and ratty jeans, but she continues walking. I try again with a guy, but no luck.

My dad's voice appears in my head out of the blue. "Speak up, Steven. No one can hear you when you mumble!"

Apparently all I had to do was raise my voice to appropriate talking level to be heard over the roar of city life. Who knew? "Could you please help me out? I'm lost."

A girl around my age stops and gives me a once over before a smirk appears on her face. "You're obviously not from here."

I blush and shake my head. "Uh, no not really. I'm from Delaware and I'm trying to get to San Francisco. I need a train to take me to the Amtrak station. Or the airport."

She nods and her blonde ponytail bobs with the motion. "My names Allison, I can show you the way. There's a train that goes straight to the airport."

I slump in relief. "Steven. Thank you so much, I thought I might get trampled."

"Being that big? Funny." Allison smiles and it dazzles me to my core enough that I return it. She's beautiful, I can't stress that fact enough. Her skin is porcelain smooth and fair, her long blonde hair drifts out of her ponytail with stick straight insistence, and her private school pantsuit is navy, which only compliments her icy blue eyes.

When she looks at me again as we walk, I feel like she's seeing through me and seeing all of my insecurity and sadness. Her gaze makes me cold and I shiver, surprised dully in the heat that I can achieve such an action when I'm sweating down to my buttcrack. I drop my eyes self consciously and keep walking as she leads me into a dark tunnel.

The steps are slimy and disgusting, various liquids condensing in corners and creating a smell I'd rather not describe. I do my best to hold my breath and Allison giggles. Her laugh is beautiful too, it sounds like the tinkling of wind chimes. "Wow, you're super not from here. Why are you going to California?"

"Oh to–," I pause. I can't just tell a mortal I'm going to a magical Roman camp. She might push me in front of the next train. "To my grandmothers house. She fell ill recently."

I fight the urge to facepalm and almost lose. Who am I, Little Red Riding Hood? It makes me want to laugh. Who would be the wolf?

She accepts the lie and puts a hand on my arm as we approach turnstiles. Instantly I'm practically aglow for her. Gentle, soft touches aren't something I'm used to and I'm immediately sheepish and starry eyed. Allison gives me a sympathetic look. "I'm so sorry, that must be hard."

She slides her card and slips through it, then hands it to me. Our fingers brush and I have to swallow the urge to giggle.

"You know," She says as we stand side by side. "You're a very handsome thing, Steven De Mayo."

I blink dreamily, my mind starting to fog over. I like the way she says my name. And she called me handsome. I smile and shrug. "I guess I just got blessed." The irony makes me laugh out loud.

Something nags though at the back of my mind, though. I could've sworn I only gave her my first name but maybe I'm so blown away I'm not remembering right.

I'm about to tell her she's gorgeous, but when I look those blue eyes are completely black and I stumble away in shock. "We'll just have to see about that," She sneers.

Her form changes in front of my very eyes and it nearly takes me the entire transformation to realize what she is.

My father had given me a book of monsters complete with a note section as a 15th birthday present and told me to keep it close, in fact it's in my backpack literally right now. At the time I'd rolled my eyes at his paranoia but thanked him profusely. I memorized it front to back by 16 and now at nearly 18, I'm starting to feel a lot more grateful.

Allison hobbles toward me on mismatched feet, one donkey leg and one bronze metal one. Her skin is bone white and her hair literally bursts into flames. I blink, but the image in front of me does not disappear. "An empousai, right?" I ask no one. She looks starving for the deluxe demigod charcuterie board that I suddenly feel like under that soulless stare.

"So handsome," She comments again, her voice a bit more scratchy and demonic as she looks me over. "I think you'll make a lovely brunch."

She pounces on me and I block my face on instinct, rifling through a series of panic and the urge to pee my pants. But then I hear a click and the sound of her banging against something metal. "What?" I mumble dumbly, opening my eyes to stare at it.

My bracelet is now a heavy shield clutched tightly by its strap to my arm, and Allison is growling as she circles me. Her skin is smoking a little too, but honestly it doesn't smell nearly as bad as the subway so it's kind of welcome. I snap out of it and drop into a defensive stance, lowering it a bit to watch her movements. Chiron always told me I may not be fast, but I could be loose and prepared for anything. I've got a good arm, but that doesn't exactly help when swords are not something typically pelted at an enemy.

"Put down your shield demigod, you have no chance of defeating me," Allison snarls, baring ugly teeth.

My arm dips but I fight it, realizing I've been charmspeaked for a hot minute. How silly of me to think an actual girl was interested in a guy who sobbed at the end of Marley and Me.

Sorry, the guy who still sobs at the end of Marley and Me.

My annoyance reaches full power when she attacks me again, talons clawing through the air hoping to make contact with my flesh so she can... well, so she can eat me I assume. I can't blame her, I'd be a hearty meal.

I must be hungry. I can't stop thinking about food, but it's not like I have the time now anyways.

I throw my body weight forward and she slams into the tiled wall covered in dirt and mystery liquid behind her, roaring in rage, "Give up, son of Venus!"

"I really don't think I should do that." My arm twitches forward and I follow the movement so the shield flies out of my hand to cut through her side. She bellows and tries to hobble forward, but I can see she's disintegrating into dust.

"You will never make it alive," She hisses.

I inch over a bit closer, strangely fascinated with her process of death. "You should try being a bit more optimistic," I suggest quietly.

Allison bursts into a pile of ash and the incoming train blows it all around into nothingness. My shield clangs to the ground and stills, so I pick it back up and inspect it. No dents, no scuffs or scratches. I have a bruise on my arm, but other than that...

I just survived my first monster attack.

The shield grows a massive hole in the middle and begins to shrink until it's just my bracelet again with the same inscription. Never once did it even occur to me Chiron was giving me a weapon. Actually, it never occurred to me that I'd need one at all. I slip it back on and it adjusts, but this time when it locks back on it doesn't hurt.

My ears work again and I hear the trains last call. I dart into a less populated car, sit in the back, and try to quietly have a panic attack.

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