I know that depression is a very serious thing. I just didn't know how serious it was until it intervened with the best thing and person I had thought I ever had.

It was contagious and powerful.

I felt myself fading into black or in that grey place, following suit in his behavior as if it was a game to play. It broke me into pieces when it grew stronger and I had yet to understand that part of the game.

I had felt selfish because I wasn't the one going through it like him, but yet, I was still involved. I was just dealing with it for the sake of love.

You don't have to deal with this.

You don't deserve to watch me be like this.

You deserve so much better.

I don't know where we stand.

I don't want help.

Nobody cares and you shouldn't either.

Just don't worry about me and don't care about me anymore because I'm leaving tonight and I'm never coming back.

Responses like that worry you when your loved one, who loves you and wants to be with you never wants to open their eyes again.

It's hard to fight for someone who doesn't want to be fought for.

When he left me, it's like he took my soul with him. I was dead inside but yet there was a bit of relief...not having to keep worrying, wishing, fighting, preventing, crying, begging...
but all of the good memories when the sickness had seized still lingered. Unfortunately, they'll never return and a piece of me never will either.

I will always love you...

We still talk every once in a while but we pretend we never existed and I guess that's what's best.