I believe some context would be helpful.

A few months ago, I got a new phone, because my old one used to belong to my dad and it had a lot of things wrong with it (there's a sad backstory that I won't indulge myself in right now).

I normally write my fanfiction in the notes app on my phone, and there's a little bar at the bottom of the screen that gives you suggestions for words that the AI thinks you're going to type next-

This thing here.

Now, my old phone was host to all thirty-nine chapters of Those Days, and about five chapters of Skip a Beat, so, naturally, the predictive text keyboard on my phone always assumed that whatever I was about to type had something to do with FB (not at all incorrect, phone. I'm proud of you).

BUT! When I got my new phone, I had to type different names and things to do with FB in the notes section for no reason other than getting my phone to recognise them as things I type regularly. In other words, I was bored and had nothing to do.

Is this even making sense.

So, purely for your entertainment... here is me, trying to re-educate my predictive text keyboard in the art of recognising Newt's name (gotta start with the basics)...

Newt

Newt 

 Newt 

Newt 

Once it appears in my predictive text keyboard I shall stop

But for now I shall keep writing Newt's name 

Newt is a cinnamon roll 

Newt is the best 

Newt will probably take a shorter time to appear in the predictive text keyboard because Newt was already there once

 You can probably tell that I'm using Newt a lot

 Like, a lot more than usual Newt 

Because I want Newt to appear faster

 In the keyboard and in real life

 Now that I think about it Newt appearing to me right here right now would make me so happy I would combust and explode and please invite Newt to my funeral Newt is allowed to say a few words 

So are my close frens

 And my parents of course

 And Newt

 Newt is back in my keyboard but this is fun so I'll keep going 

Newt

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt

 Okay time to use Newt in a predictive text keyboard sentence

 Newt is the best one in the office (?) 

What on earth

 Maybe I'll educate my keyboard more

 Hold on

 I'll write one more predictive text keyboard sentence 

Newt is a joke

 WHAT 

HOW DARE YOU

 FOOL 

IDIOT

 NEWT IS DISGUSTED WITH YOU

 NEWT IS NOT A JOKE 

NEWT IS THE MOST PRECIOUS SOFT PERFECT ADORABLE LITTLE CINNAMON ROLL IN THE WORLD 

I AM DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, PHONE 

NEWT IS DISAPPOINTED IN YOU

 TINA IS DISAPPOINTED IN YOU 

THE NIFFLER IS DISAPPOINTED IN YOU

 NEWT IS THE BEST

 Okay I need to teach my phone a lesson 

Newt is a cinnamon roll

 Newt is the best 

Newt is adorable

 Newt is a smol cinnamon roll 

Newt deserves a hug and a cookie and a private defence squad 

Newt is my precious little cinnamon roll 

And Tina's 

Newt 

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt 

 Newttttttttt 

Newt

 Okay time for some puns

 Oranges have a lot of Newtrients 

AHAHHAAHAHHA

 I like peanut butter and Newtella

 Ahhahahahahahahahhahaha 

Lemme check Wattpad

 Ooh I have... 

NEWTIFICATIONS 

AHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

 I am HILARIOUS

 I will Newt stop

 Ever

 Newt Scamander 

Newt

 Newt 

 Newt

 Newt

 Okay now it's time for some quotes 

Newt Scamander, and you are? 

Scamander? Theseus Scamander, the war hero? No, this is his little brother.

 Newt! Save him! 

NEwT! 

Newt! 

Okay pause. 

Newtifications is in my predictive text keyboard now-

 ... 

Newt 

 Newt 

 Newt

 Okay continue with the quotes 

Mr Scamander, do you think Dumbledore will mourn for you? 

Newt Scamander, with fiancée Leta Lestrange, brother Theseus, and unknown woman 

I forgot to put quotation marks but I honestly cannot care less 

My apologies, Mr Scamander! I shall return and release you when Credence is dead! 

I don't actually have the screenplay with me, so I'm writing this all by memory

 And now for the one you've all been waiting for... 

I got this, I mean, it's just a picture of you from the paper, but it's interesting because your eyes in newsprint... see, in reality they have this effect in them, Tina, it's like fire in water, in dark water. I've only ever seen that... I've only ever seen that in... 

Salamanders 

AAAUUUGGHHH THESE TWO ARE GOING TO BE THE DEATH OF ME 

also, I'm sorry if there are mistakes in there, but I don't have the screenplay, so~ 

Newt

 Newt 

Newt

 Newt 

 Newt 

 Newt 

 Time for another sentence

 Newt is a cinnamon roll and he is so adorable and I love him so much that I will be happy (Duh?) 

Okay

 Not bad, predictive text keyboard 

Not bad

 But you forgot to mention something 

I LOVE HIM TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HIM BECAUSE HE IS SO SOFT AND PRECIOUS AND PERFECT AND ADORABLE AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE NEWT SCAMANDER AND I WISH I WAS HIS BEST FRIEND BECAUSE I COULD TALK TO HIM EVERY DAY AND I COULD ALSO SEE TINA SO I COULD TELL HER HOW LUCKY SHE IS TO FIND SOMEONE LIKE NEWT AND WOULDN'T THAT BE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING?!!?!?!? 

Newt

 Newt 

 Newt 

 Newt 

 Okay time for another predictive text keyboard sentence 

Newt is the time of time to get my hair finished and then I will die 

WHAT.

 WHAT EVEN.

 I'M SO CONFUSED. 

Newt 

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt

 Newt

Newt is the cutest cinnamon roll in the world

 Now repeat what I said, phone

 Newt is the cutest little cinnamon roll in the world (Okay to be fair, I wrote the first two characters of the fourth word to help my phone) 

 good job 

More sentences!! 

Newt is the time of the year (?) 

Newt is the time of time to get my hair finished (?????) 

Phone, WHY? 

Newt is the best

 Newt is the best 

Newt is the best 

Newt is the best 

 Newt is the best

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Newt is a cinnamon roll 

 Why is it still not working :( 

Newt 

 Newt

 Newt 

 Newt 

Newt is the best one in his life (?) 

He seems to have a better ending than the other one (??)

 and the best way of keeping the score (???) 

Not sure if this is working..

Newt is the best

 Newt is my cinnamon roll

 Newt is the best wizard on earth

 Newt is adorable 

Cute Newt

 Is it a coincidence that they rhyme 

Cute Newt 

Newt really is cute 

He is very adorable

 CUTIE 

Newt has majestic hair

 Newt's hair falls majestically to the side and the colour of it is just HNN WHY IS HE PERFECTION

 I need Newt's name on a necklace and I shall wear it everywhere everyday Because I'm not allowed to get a tattoo or I would tattoo Newt's name somewhere on myself

 Probably my wrist 

Either that, or I'd have salamanders written on my wrist but the A's are the Deathly Hallows symbol

 Newt

Newt

Newt

 I wonder if Newt ever got a tattoo 

Newt in the 21st century would get a thunderbird tattoo maybe? 

Newt finally appeared in my predictive text keyboard!!!!! 

NEWT 

NEWT

 NEWT

 NEWT

NEWT 

 AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH 

NEWT 

 NEWT

 NEWT

 Y E S

 NEWT

 NEWT

 NEWT

 I'M SO HAPPY 

FAITH HAS BEEN RESTORED TO THE GALAXY

 NEWT

 NEWT

 NEWT

 Newt could have appeared earlier and I just didn't see it :/ 

Newt

 NEVERMIND 

Newt Scamander 

 Newton Artemis Fido Scamander

 Newt 

Newt

 Newt

 N e w t

 NEWT

I should post this on Wattpad

There u go chirren.

I don't even know the point of this but...

~