For fuller context, this is chapter 2, but happens simultaneously to chapter 1. (Also a little note, this is, as of now, my favorite part in this entire series.)

Edit (9/23): For some odd reason, Wattpad didn't save my italics, apostrophes, or quotations, so I'm coming back to fix it. But like, why didn't anyone tell me...? :(

Main Character: Grian

Warnings: Self-Esteem/Self-loathing issues, as well as killing. May be a bit intense if you're sensitive to darker themes related to self-harm

Spoilers: Entire season of 3rd Life, references to season 7 of Hermitcraft

Summary: After being betrayed by Scar, Grian starts to question if he's actually worth anything to anyone spiraling to the thought that he doesn't deserve being this close to a win on the series.

When Grian created this game, he counted on it to be filled with an abundance of mischief, pranks, war, and betrayal. All which would provide entertainment to their stories when they told their friends about this world. And because he created it, he shouldn't be surprised that he was betrayed, but he was.

They were a team. The best duo on the server. What made Scar change his mind?

What had he done that wasn't good enough?

He didn't forget that he had been the one to kill Scar in the first place. That was the only reason they were a "team". It was only fair that Scar took him out in revenge.

But still.

Grian stood by Scar even when things failed. Even when he passed out those silly "friend passes" and traded for "reputation points". He had fought alongside Scar, and helped plan out how they would execute offense and defense. He had been helpful, right?

Scar was chaotic. That was partly why Grian wanted and kept him alive. He was funny and random, which lightened the mood oftentimes. Scar was a wildcard and no one—not even Grian—knew what to expect.

So really... why was he surprised?

He really should have seen it coming all along.

Nonetheless.

"What did I do wrong?" he asked Mr. Bubbles, who somehow, after all that war, managed to make it out alive. The bumble bee seemed to be completely oblivious to the majority of the wars that had recently waged out. Grian himself wished for the innocence and peace the creature had.

He tied Mr. Bubbles to a lead and tried to find a good path for a short walk. Grian decided on a forest which completely avoided the ruins of what he wished was Armageddon. The crater was an ever present mark of one of the many things he had done wrong.

"Do you think Mumbo would be proud?" Grian asked Scar. The two had just finished trapping the place and were going to cover while they were in the calm before the storm. After the problems with his traps, he had bits of doubt. But they had checked the mechanics of the future explosion and knew it should work.

"OF COURSE HE WOULD!" Scar reassured him, and with full confidence said, "He'd be crying tears—happy tears—if he saw you right now."

A tiny part in his head whispered, "Proud? You've failed the simplest of redstone again and again. What's to be proud of? ...Did you really start a silly little game to make someone proud? Pathetic." (But for some reason that little voice said the word "pathetic" in Joel's voice.)

"All you do is bring servers to chaos," it continued. "And even if you do win, what do you gain? Bragging rights? Sounds like you're trying to compensate for something. (That last sentence was said in Doc's voice this time.)

Grian was brought back to present time thanks to an arrow that got lodged into his armor (and poked him slightly). "It's night already?" He scrolled through the chat, making sure Bdubs and Scar hadn't killed each other yet. When he didn't spot any new deaths, he worried they were coming to ambush him.

At any moment they could kill him. At any moment he could fail, again. And despite making it to the top three, it didn't feel like it was really true or right. Like he had somehow slipped through the cracks.

Which could be considered true seeing as Scar and Bdubs had been doing so much killing as of late, while Grian just stood there and watched. He watched as Jimmy did a better job detonating tnt. He lay dead while Scar played with the potential of a final death in the bunker. And another time he watched a creeper doing the killing for him.

So if he did win... was it really, truly, a win?

He broke his own rules (and he was the first to do so). Funny, that on one of the first few days on the server, he killed (and it was the first death of all things). And sure, he didn't mean it, but it didn't disregard the fact that he had went against his own rules; failing the essence of the game in itself.

Teaming up with Scar would be a fair trade-off for what he did, right? Scar would most likely have lost the game quickly anyway. It'd be unlikely that Grian would have to team with Scar for long; but if not, Grian would work as a slave, paying off his crimes.

It was lucky that he hadn't been brought into the fiery arrows Bdubs was so fond of. "The omega fire arrows of doom," he thought, assuming that's what Iskall would have called them if he were here. This brought him to thinking about his friends and in turn, missing them.

Part of him wondered what they thought (or what they would, when they heard stories of 3rd Life). Were they looking down on him with judgement and disgust, making note of every failure and misstep?

Maybe if he hadn't been thrown away so quickly by Scar, he wouldn't feel so insecure. He really was pathetic. It was silly, the only time he felt much worth was when he was valued by a homicidal madman—the literally epitome of chaos, the one who looked out for number one.

"He only let me go because I wasn't of use. It's nothing against me... other than the fact that I'm worth little to nothing to anyone at this point." He realized his failure in pairing up with someone who would hold any value to him, and it stung.

"I should probably get to doing something. There's nothing for anyone to be proud of if I don't do anything," he thought, trying to find anger in him somewhere that wanted to fight Scar. "And I'm totally mad at him and completely ready to decapitate anyone who comes in my path. Totally." It sounded too sarcastic for his liking.

"I made this game for war so I'll give them war." At least the ghosts would get to see one last battle before they ended the series.

Grian tied up Mr. Bubbles and ran off to find out whatever it was Scar and Bdubs were scheming.

Instead of finding that, he got a message.

<GoodTimeWithScar> whispers to you: I have a plan

But at this point, he couldn't have cared less.

"BETRAYER! BETRAYER!" Grian mustered up all the anger he could and hit Scar off the ledge. Then he proceeded to do the same with Bdubs.

In only a few seconds, Scar took Bdubs out in hopes of Grian seeing his loyalty. Between the want of proving himself and the slight amount of bloodlust, Grian swung once more at Scar.

"TRAITOR! TRAITOR, SCAR!" He was practically crying at this point. "I can win this game... for real."

Instead of Scar fighting back, he stood completely still. "Go on then. You can take me out."

Why didn't Scar care if he won or not? And how could Grian kill him if he just gave up? This way, Grian still didn't prove anything. His opponent, his madman opponent, was surrendering. Someone he would have considered himself close to for a little while, was letting him take the win.

He hoped they could be real friends when they got back to Hermitcraft.

"I... I can't—" Grian choked out.

"For the amounts of help you've given me—for keeping me alive—you've earned the enchanter." Scar smiled, this time one that looked genuine. "Take it from me. Take the win." No bloodthirst in his voice. No malice. No trickery.

"I can't—I-I really can't." He sat down in the pond of water.

"What?"

"You... you deserve the win." He spoke only as loud as necessary, or possibly even quieter.

"No, what did you say? Come again?"

Grian gave out a shaky laugh. "You... I want you to win... I can't—I just can't bring myself to kill you."

Scar took off his armor and let his pants and upper body get soaked in the water. "We—we won. As a team." He hugged Grian for a few seconds, letting the thought sink in.

"That's kind of silly considering you're the one who did the killing."

"What about the traps? They killed plenty of people."

"Traps." Grian used air quotes. "They all failed, remember?"

"What about Monopoly Mountain? I couldn't have gotten the power I did without you!"

Grian shook his head. "Monopoly mountain failed, Scar. Scott and all his friends found more Dark Oak, remember? We wasted all that time. And they took our sand. And... and it all could have gone so much better."

For a moment, all the noise that was made was sounds of creatures around them.

"What about Pizza? Pizza worked out fine."

"Pizza was stolen. And then he was killed."

"Leftover Pizza?"

"Also killed."

"Mr. Bubbles?"

"No emotional attachment."

"We had fun though."

"I-I guess?" He hated that he had to question if he really enjoyed his own game—not to mention do so in front of someone. "I just—I figured I pretty much fail at everything... and you worked hard for this. You deserve the win. I... I don't."

"We're a team. Neither of us would have made it this far without the other cheering us on. And you stayed alive, which is much more than I could say there at the beginning." Scar smiled, but it seemed like it was there just because he wanted Grian to feel better.

"I still—I feel as though the way I played it was basically a failure. So many areas I could have executed a plan better. Honestly, this entire game is basically a fail. An experiment in its rawest form."

"I don't know what you're talking about. It was amayzin'. I'm sure everyone had tons of fun in it too!"

<ImpulseSV> Actually, no. Right now there's an argument going on between Cleo and Bdubs. But majority of us had fun! But if you want a success from it, we need to see you finally kill each other.

<ImpulseSV> FIGHT

<Renthedog> Battle it out. Fists only. No armor. No pressure, but this needs to be entertaining.

"YOU GUYS AREN'T HELPING!" Scar yelled out.

<Skizzleman> YEAH! FINISH IT OUT ALREADY!

"One last battle?" Scar tried to suggest.

<ImpulseSV> KILL

<ImpulseSV> KILL

<ImpulseSV> KILL

"I just—war doesn't sound right at the moment."

"Well then. Want to ride in the Friendship Boat?" Scar pulled out a small boat from his inventory.

"Honestly, you should've just killed me already."

"But it's no fun to knock a man down while he's already on the ground! I have to pick you up and then win!" This managed to gain a small laugh from Grian.

"You think you can knock me over that easily?"

"I killed you once. It can't be too hard to do again!"

The ghosts started to chant around them and spam things like "WAR" or "MURDER" into the chat.

"I also got you once!"

"I wasn't expecting to get blown up by a creeper!"

"Well—I wasn't expecting you to backstab me like that!"

Scar laughed, made some mumble about always staying true to the friend and kill passes, and said lightly, "You were on a yellow life. I had to knock you down from you thrown."

A pause. Then Grian asked, "Wasn't Ren the one on the throne?"

"Metaphorically speaking, Grian. But yes... His throne was much better looking than yours would ever be."

That hurt more than it was intended to.

Then again, Ren was supposed to be a king. Grian was just a minion. A minion that could be disposed of.

"You ok?"

No response.

"Sorry, it was meant to be a joke. You would've done fine if you were king."

"Don't pity me."

Neither spoke for a moment. During that time, Grian climbed out of the boat and sat on the land. Scar followed suit.

"Did you mean it... when you answered my question?"

"What question?"

He took a deep breath before asking, "Would they be proud?"

""They" being the other hermits?"

"Yeah... do you really think they would?"

"Of course they would! Honestly, everyone there is proud of everyone else. And there's no way you could even stay on someone's bad side for long!"

BdoubleO100 left the game.

"And I'm sure basically everyone enjoyed this game a ton!" he exclaimed, pretty close to repeating what he said before.

<TangoTek> That aged well

<ZombieCleo> Yeah. Bdubs officially hates me. But I have no room to care at all.

<Etho> What happened to the crastle team? Was his head getting too big for his tiny body?

<ZombieCleo> None of your business

<ImpulseSV> Wow. That couldn't've been good

"Well... I enjoyed it even if no one else did!" Scar pressed on. "And I'm sure everything will be perfect in just a few days! And the ghosts will enjoy it if we end off with a small battle."

Grian decided not to fight against it.

<Renthedog> Remember the rules. No armor. No weapons. Just a friendly fist fight.

They walked back to the desert. Scar tried to lighten up the mood by telling Grian of the conversation he and Bdubs had about watches. They were building up the cactus circle before he stopped talking. "Honestly, I think that he lying to me about liking watches was the biggest betrayal of the series.

Even as they finished it, Grian felt weird about how they were ending the series. All he could do was ask, "You ready?"

"Yep."

At least, no matter who won, they were on good terms.

All the ghosts collectively did a countdown.

<Inthelittlewood> AND GO!

Martyn was their commentator, explaining their attacks in detail. While this happened, the other ghosts placed bets on who would win.

It felt so surreal when he finally took the final punch, leaving all Scar's items to scatter around.

He didn't have much bloodlust, and even then, he didn't want to do anything against Scar.

The ghosts cheered him on (even Scar floated back to the group, happy for him), but Grian wished he had been one of the first to die.

He didn't win this.

It was one-hundred percent Scar's win.

But the worst part was: he'd go back to Hermitcraft, only to find divisions in the group and plenty of members who were salty in one way or another. And if the chat wasn't lying, there were already some battle scars (both scars of broken friendships and markings from blades or arrows).

And the thought hurt.

It hurt so much.

What was the point of this game?

All done for nothing...

All it did was hurt people.

And now there was no one left.

Was he left to win just so he'd suffer?

And even if they didn't want him to go to such extents...

Grian fell from a high place.