TFL ch 29

"Miss Amelia, Princess Selina has requested your presence in her private chambers." A Rhodenian guard announces, his face impassive and figure imposing in his burgundy uniform.

"Why does Selina wish to see me?" The question slips out before my manners have time to overrule. A surprised gasp escapes Gwen's mouth and I wince as the guard stands still, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. Goodness, why do I have to be such a fool! "Forgive me." I say as I rise to my feet. Exiting the room, I follow the guard down the labyrinth of hallways. As we walk, I fidget with my clothing. Princess Selina always seems to make me feel inadequate. How could I even compare to her? She was perfect in every way—beautiful, kind, royal, and self-controlled — everything that Eric could want in a wife. No wonder he would obey his father's wishes. She would teach herself to love him and together they would live their happily ever after...

"Miss Amelia." The guard pauses for a moment and looks at me. My hands fiddle with the material of my dress nervously.

"Yes?"

"You do realize that you and the princess are the favorites, here. The entire staff here has nothing but love and respect for you. You are so... honest and relatable that we love nearly as much as we love our own royal family. Princess Selina is not so hard to impress as you think. Relax."

I suck in a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I--"

"Don't apologize. I just hate to see the bravest lady in all of Rhodenheim get so flustered by an audience with the princess." With that, he continues to the door and opens it for me, winking at me as I pass through. Despite his reassuring words, I still tremble as he shuts the door. I am completely alone with Selina. Now she can view every single fault without anyone for me to hide behind.

She rises from her seat. "Amelia. I am so glad to see you! You are feeling better, right?" She crosses over to me and grasps my hand, sincere concern and kindness in her eyes.

"Yes, I am, your highness. Thank you for asking."

"Please call me Selina, or Selly. My older sister always called me Silly Selly." I giggle at the ridiculous nickname. "Ah, there we go! I finally pulled a genuine smile out of you!"

At her comment, I blush profusely. I had tried so hard to hide the feelings of dislike I had for her, but evidently I failed miserably at doing so. "I am so sorry. I—"

"You're in love with Eric and hate knowing that I am engaged to him."

The sentence lands like a blow to my gut, knocking my breath out of me. I stare at Selina for several moments, clueless as to what to say. "I am sorry for being so blunt," she says, "but I have always felt that it is best to be up front with people." She looks at me with some remorse but yet with a questioning gaze, as if she were longing to understand what I am thinking. Yet I do not even have an idea of what I am thinking! Thoughts and questions swirl in my thoughts like leaves tossed about it an autumn storm. Finally, I pull out the words, "Is it that obvious?"

She sighs. "No, it isn't. I just have watched a similar situation happen before..." Guiding me over to the couch, she sits down and continues, "You have done so well, even hiding the truth from Guinevere. I'm sure it must shock you that I noticed."

"Very much so... You say you have watched a similar situation?" The words come out of my mouth, my mind nearly not comprehending my own words.

"Yes, my sister, Adelaide. Delia, we all called her... She was so vibrant, so persistent, so... so much like you. She would have done the same thing, sneaking off to solve the mysteries in her head." Selina pauses and looks into the fire. She swallows slowly, as if she were willing her voice to stay under control. "She fell in love with Lord Bentley when she was sixteen, but she felt that it would go against her honor to stop the arranged marriage between herself and another prince. Instead of confessing her feelings, she threw herself into being as good as she could be in everything—war tactics, sword fighting, horsemanship—all to conceal the feelings she had."

As Selina looks back at me, her words ring in my ears. I had done the exact same thing, practicing with Castra to escape my feelings for Eric. Yet it was the only thing that kept me from being pathetic and pining after someone I could never have. "Sometimes, that's the only door fate allows us to open."

"When you don't like the doors fate allows you, Amelia, you make another door." I look at her in confusion. What was she saying? How could I make another door? "Listen, Amelia. I'm not in love with Eric, nor will I ever be. He is kind and would be the perfect king, but... he's not for me. I will not marry a man I do not love. That was the promise I made to Delia on her death bed and I plan to keep that promise."

"What?! What about your country?" Despite my outward reaction, a wave of delight surges over me inwardly. Eric would not be married after all.

"I will rule as queen. A week from tomorrow is my twentieth birthday and I will be, by law, queen of Rhodenheim. After the coronation, I will publically announce that the engagement has been annulled."

"But what does Eric think about this?" He had clearly said to Lord Bentley that he would follow through with his father's wishes, hadn't he? Surely, he would insist upon the marriage out of respect for his father's wishes.

"He was relieved when I told him this morning. He could not go against his father's wishes but disliked having to marry someone he didn't love."

If I were not sitting down, I believe I would swoon. All this information is coming at me too quickly for me to process it all. Eric is free to marry whomever he pleases! Then another fact hit me hard after that thought. He would never think of me as someone to love. I am his sister's servant, like a sister to him. That is all I will ever be. Unworthy. The word mockingly pervades my thoughts. The little spring of hope that had started suddenly is dry and dusty. "Well, I am glad that both of you could choose that which would make you happy." I say as I rise from my seat. A dagger of pain stabs into my heart as I realize now I cannot hide the fact that Eric does not love me behind the arranged marriage. "But that opens no doors for me. I am still nothing more than a pauper, a servant of the king—someone he could never love. Good night, Selina."

Before I reach the door, she grabs my arm. "Amelia, wait! You-"

"Forgive me, your highness, but I am exhausted. I must go to sleep." I rush out the door to hide the falling tears. To have my weakness so bluntly bared, to realize I might have hope only for it to be wrenched away and replaced with a taunting illusion—it was too much. I answer Gwen's numerous questions as vaguely as possible and change hurriedly into my nightclothes. Sleep may be evasive but at least my pillow can cover my foolish, silent tears from Gwen's caring gaze.

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Hey! How are you, my lovelies? So what do you think of Selina now? Do you feel that Lee has a chance now? Or is it still hopeless??

Now for the question of the chapter: Which adjectives best describes you?

A. Bubbly and out-going

B. Shy and bookish

C. Somewhere in between A and B

I have to say I am definitely an A. I like talking to people, telling crazy stories with voices and big hand gestures.

Please don't forget to...

VOTE!!!!

COMMENT!!!

ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!

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Dedicated to @pennywithaney. I have fallen in love with her story Glass Slippers!!! It is a Cinderella re-telling and it is AMAZING!!! I read all the chapters in one night!!! So go check it out if you are looking for a new read! It is totally clean and totally worth reading!!!

HAVE A SPLENDIFEROUS DAY!!!