*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ

I woke up alone.

Its no surprise that Jungkook snuck out sometime during the course of the night. Probably to finish getting his things packed up.

He said that he was sorry but he didn't say, he wasn't leaving.

Rolling slowly out of bed, I pull on the most comfy pair of track-suit bottoms I can find and a loose t-shirt. It could just be my mind playing tricks on me, but I think that peanut is starting to show?

The difference is one that only I can notice but its definitely there. Im starting to feel fuller, rounder already. 

I lift my eyes sadly from my stomach and wander toward the kitchen area where I find Alyssa alone, eating a bowl of porridge.

"Hi, you're up early," She offers me a piteous smile.

"I..." 

Alyssa sees that I'm lost for words and the corners of her mouth crease up, empathically.

"Do you want me to make you one?" She offers, motioning to her bowl of schlep, decorated by a mountain of mixed berries.

"Sure," I appease her offer. Finding that I should accept any bit of kindness wherever I can get it.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted last night." I say.

"It's alright, Jungkook caught us all by surprise." She replies lightly.

I know that I probably made a fool of myself in-front of everyone last night by causing such a scene and walking out like that.

She doesn't take long fixing me a bowl of my own and I accept it gratefully as she sits back down. She garnished my porridge with sliced banana instead of berries and the concoction smelt wonderfully of cinnamon and...

"What else did you put in it?" I ask.

"...its cardamom!" She replies, looking pleased with herself.

Taking the first bite, it actually doesn't taste half-bad either.

We eat quietly together but I can feel Alyssa's eyes on me the entire time.

"What?"  I ask looking up, unable to ignore it anymore.

"N-nothing!" She shakes her head. Her eyes are wide with worry but she plasters on a fake smile. 

I turn my attention back to the bowl of porridge that is almost all gone by now.

"Mel, are you....you know, okay?" She questions, finally.

A quick glance up, reveals to me, a frightened looking Alyssa. I know its killing her not to ask me  about my situation with Jungkook.  

"It's okay to ask, I won't bite..." 

I sigh, dropping my spoon into the dish with an unintentionally loud clatter and she winces. 

I guess I can tend to come off a bit intimidating sometimes.

Maybe that's what scares Jungkook away all the time?

"H-how did you know that I wanted to ask something?" She stammers,  naively making me chuckle.

"Well, its obvious! And did the Jeon's teach you how to do that intense, staring thing?"

"What staring thing?" She asks innocently and I roll my eyes. 

"Okay, fine. You weren't staring at me all this time and you don't wanna ask me anything...so I'll go back to my room now."

Alyssa looks bewildered as I vacate the table.

"Oh," I pause, "Is it okay if I take a rain check from whatever activities you've got planned today? I'm not feeling quite..... up to it."  

Not really waiting for an answer, I shuffle out of the kitchen, feeling suddenly sleepy again.

"M-melanie..."

"I promise I'll be a better maid of honour when I get back to the City..." I mumble trying to pacify her, thinking she was going to insist on me still taking part.

Alyssa scrambles to block my path. 

"Melanie wait! I wanted to ask... are you..." 

"Am I, what?"

"......is there something that you're not telling me because you can tell me," She takes my hand gently in hers. Her eyes are sincere and almost swimming in tears as I try to decipher her pained expression, "..you can tell me and I wont judge you for it. I swear."

What?

I smile painfully, "Don't cry for me, Alyssa. I'll be okay." I give another brave smile wanting to disintegrate on the spot.

Alyssa chokes out a miserable, sob. 

"... but will you and the baby be okay?"

"Excuse me?" I yank my hand away in surprise at first, then immediately collect myself to curb an obviously guilty reaction, "...the baby? There's no baby!" I lie, laughing as if what she said was absolutely ridiculous. 

But Alyssa gives me a determined glare and that's when I know that I'm dead in the water. 

"But how do you.." I whisper, dumbfounded.

"I just know," she says firmly, also whispering back and that's a relief because then, at least it means that we're both of the understanding that this is indeed a secret.

And one which I intend on keeping...

That is, until I can't anymore.

I fight the automatic compulsion to look down at my growing tummy, still barely visible to the unsuspecting eye.

Alyssa's gaze deepens with emotion in receipt of the confirmation that she wanted.  

"How long have you known?" I ask.

"Well, since the accident at my house I couldn't shake the feeling that you were and then you've been so emotional since then...."

Alyssa was talking about me like some sort of science project that she's been observing for weeks and couldn't wait to share her findings. My face goes hot with embarrassment.

"Emotional..." I echo.

"Yes!" she giggles and pulls me back in to sit with her at the table, "I tried to put it all down to Jungkook being out here on this trip, which I'm sure was a part of it. I mean, you guys get on each others nerves all the time but these past few days, it was a bit extra!" She chuckles. 

"And what really made me suspicious ....well, " 

Her eyes darken.

"I haven't told anyone this but I saw Eric on the morning that he left." 

My breathing slows immediately on remeberance of that day.

"He was in such a hurry so I asked where he was going ....and he said some things that made me sure that..."

Urgh! Dammit, Eric!

I groan, holding my face in the cradle of my palms.

"I really messed up, huh....getting knocked up by someone who doesn't even want me?" I laugh bitterly, "Do you know, I even let him sleep with me last-night? Even after everything...I still let him because....well I don't know why! I'm stupid.."

The tears come, and I don't stop them. 

"I'm a fool for him, I know that." I press a hand to my forehead as if it would make the tears stop flowing but it didn't.

"Don't talk like that, Melanie. You just love him, that's all." She guides my hands gently away from my face, "Jungkook is your....you guys are soulmates and.."

"Alyssa stop!"  I bark angrily in response, causing her to recoil in shock.

"Jungkook isn't anything to me. Got that?"

Alyssa nods looking pale and I feel bad but I won't have people tell me what we are when we aren't that at all!

"Let's just keep this between us for now, alright? You can't tell anyone. Can you do that for me?" I ask, looking over my shoulder.

She nods her head reluctantly.

"....not even Ji-Woo."

"Okay, I won't say a thing." 

"Thank you," I reply remorsefully after seeing her face.

"Hey!" Alyssa calls, just when I'm about to leave her sight, "Congratulations, Mel. I never got to say congratulations about the...you know." She finishes hurriedly when I open my eyes threateningly wide.

"Thanks.." I whisper again.

"You know, I'm here if you need to talk...or anything?" She offers, sadly.

"I know," I nod resolutely and close the door.

My entire body hums with anxiety and I'm feeling like one big, raw nerve as I make my way back to my room. 

Suddenly, my mind comes to a screeching halt and my feet follow suit.

I hear the distant sound of Jungkook's voice.

Spinning around, I look in every direction trying to find out where he is, which leads me to an open window looking out onto the gravel walkway outside.

He's sitting with Jimin, a heavy looking black suitcase and a duffle bag at his feet. My stomach churns with distaste.

I thought he'd left already.

"Go on, get the hell out of here, what's keeping you..." I mutter underneath my breath, concealed behind the window. 

Everything considered, what was the point in hanging around, waiting to watch him leave? I decide to creep back to my room and hide out there for the next 48 hours until the bus arrives to take us back to the city.

That is until,

"You should tell her, Kook.." Jimin says, immediately catching my attention.

I pause, staying hidden while I listen intently. Their voices are barely audible but when I stay still enough and hold my breath, I'm able to decipher some of the words.

"I can't do that Jimim. If anything were to happen to Mel, I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

"What do you mean?" Jimin retorts, "Are you saying that you can't protect her?"

"Don't fucking push me, Jimin!" Jungkook grits angrily, "What do you think I'm doing? I am protecting her!"

"No you're not, you're running away!"

"I'm not running away!"

Jimin and Jungkook are bickering in hushed tones over something...I don't know what.

What does he need to protect me from? 

"You don't know the half of it, Jimin. They've already targeted her company. They know where she works. And its all my fucking fault, I never should've gone there. Now I have to make things right."

"I don't know man...." Jimin says, "Is this really the way to do it?" Jimin shakes his head.

"It's the only way."

Hand resting over my heart, I crouch down, staying hidden. The torment of my curiosity pulls my mind in so many different directions at once that I can't even think straight!

Just as Jungkook answers him, a black SUV with tinted windows pulls into the driveway and Jungkook disappears inside it without another backward glance.

Why would I need to be protected and whose 'they'?

Light smoke kicks up in the wake of the phantom-like vehicle as it speeds off down the stony path and out of sight.

When the dust settles, my heart sinks in realisation that I've lost the man that I love for the second time and maybe the last.

There's so much more that I want to ask after overhearing that strange conversation and panic floods me because I know now, that its too late.

He's already gone.

                                                    *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ

https://youtu.be/lOuOmk0QKoc

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