JOHN

The paper poked at my leg. It prodded at my thigh. I felt it screaming, when I rested my hand on top of my pants pocket. It flirted with my attention under my guitar. It stabbed me enviously when Yoko sat on my lap and wrapped her arms around my neck.

The whole rehearsal the paper tempted and bullied me. It tugged at my pants seams, trying to pull itself out of my pocket, trying to reveal itself in front of Yoko. It danced wildly when I stood up, so crazy that I had to throw my hand on top of my pants to make sure it hadn't jumped out. It weighed down my leg, and I walked with a limp.

The heavy ink of Prudence's handwriting tantalized me, before I had even seen it. The mysterious address and phone number sneaked glances at me, and then furtively hid itself when I turned to look.

I could sneak out of the studio, say I'm going to the can or getting a snack or somat...

Come on, the paper whispered in my ear, right here, right now.

My hands slapped each one of my pockets. I was looking for a cigarette. In its travels, my left hand quickly- accidentally- pulled out the paper and sneaked it between the index and middle finger.

The cigarette could wait.

The paper pulsed in my hand. It grew warm with the clammy flesh. Its heartbeat matched mine.

That's right, now just go to the phone...

Prudence's laugh tinkled between my fingers. I felt sweat snake its way down my back.

"Alright, that's enough for today-"

I threw my guitar off and shot out of my seat. Without speaking, I grabbed Yoko's hand and began to tug her out of the studio.

"John, slow down!" Yoko breathed behind me. I came to an abrupt stop, but Yoko knew to move out of the way before a collision could happen. 

I turned on my heels and marched to George, who was standing and packing his guitar in its case.

"George," I said, and he turned to look at me.

"What?"

I stuck my hand out and dropped the throbbing paper into his case. It screamed the complete journey down, and crashed onto the wood of the guitar.

"Don't ever do that to me again."

George stared at me, eyes wider than usual, one eyebrow raised, mouth slightly open, and nodded slowly.

I spun around and left, Yoko in tow.

PRUDENCE

With a frustrated sigh, I tore the paper out of the sketchbook and tossed it on the floor. It landed next to the rest of the crumpled sheets in the wastebasket.

"This is bollocks," I grumbled to myself, dropping my head onto the sketchbook. I let the book drop onto the desk, and the pencil after it.

I turned to the wall clock, and rolled my eyes back. It's been three hours like this, sitting and trying to design outfits, but to no avail. What would start as a dress would dissolve into meaningless scribbles.

There was no big project at the end of the week. No meeting with buyers. I had filled my quota for the week days ago. I could've gone home if I wanted to. I only attempted to design to distract myself. Since yesterday's lunch with George, I felt... uneasy. No, that's not quite the right word. Hesitant. As if I was being pushed into a world that I didn't belong in, where celebrities cheated on each other and hid in alleyways and wrote songs about their secrets for all the world to see.

I didn't need this world. I was never a part of it. And the one time I tried to ease my way into it, back in Paris, John had shut me out. 

Yet here I was, a shoulder for George to cry on about how his model wife may be cheating with Eric Clapton. I knew it was silly to be starstruck by my best friend's affairs, but I couldn't help it, and it left me worried. Was I to be thrust into this new world, with all the paparazzi and crazy fans and disguises?

And what about John? How would I join the world he lives in?

What would the press say? That I'm his "new girl"? Some bird off the streets? A throwaway? The ruin of his marriage?

But how would it ever get that far, anyway? John pretended I didn't exist.

Was this my imagination running wild? I couldn't tell anymore.

I ran my hands through my hair. The building felt stuffy and I couldn't breathe too well. I stood up and walked past the others' desks to the window. Throwing it open, I climbed onto the fire escape, the same one where I watched the Beatles sing on the roof, the same one where all this... strangeness started. I leaned over the railing, closed my eyes and tossed my head down to flip my hair over the front. The air wove through my hair and over the back of my neck, and my breathing became calmer.

Honking cars screamed below. Doors slammed, and shoes clicked on the sidewalk. From floors away, I felt I was being watched. I threw my head back and scanned the streets.

Oh God. Not again.

John stared back up at me from the sidewalk, in front of the Apple building. He was alone, and his posture was stiff, shoulders back. I couldn't see his face completely, just the gleam from his glasses in the daylight.

It was a scene repeating itself. We stared at each other, and neither made a move.

Every worry I had, every fear of being in the spotlight by association, fell off the fire escape. I didn't care about this new world. I was ready to be in it, if it meant that John and I wouldn't have to gawk at each other this way, from such a distance, if it meant that we could finally speak, if it meant that he could explain to me-

John suddenly looked away and down at an open car door in front of him. He wasn't alone. I spun around and dropped to the ground, pulling my knees into my chest. Holding my breath, I waited until I heard what I thought to be the car drive away. I counted to twenty before I let myself turn and look back. The car, and John, weren't there.

I wanted to scream. What was I so afraid of? When John was in front of me, I felt... I don't know what I felt... yearning, of some kind.

But how could I, after what he had done to me? When he wasn't around, I felt anger. I felt betrayal. But seeing him over and over again...

I buried my head in my knees and sat on that dingy fire escape for eons, my back throbbing and my hands numbing from cold.

JOHN

"John, are you getting in?"

I dropped my head, startled to hear Yoko's voice. She sat in the backseat of the car, looking at me expectantly.

I flashed my face back up, but Prudence wasn't standing anymore. She was turned away, below the railing, her auburn hair sifting in the breeze.

I wanted to reach out my arm and grab hers, to pull her to me. I wanted to shout to her, "I have to talk to you! I can't wait anymore! Speak to me!"

But it was not the time. I ducked into the car and slammed the door shut, and the chauffeur drove us away.

Yoko lay her head down on my lap, and I let her. I stared out the window, and watched the blasted paper floating alongside me, down the street, around the corner, over the houses...

"Yoko, when we get home, I have to make some calls. So I'll need some privacy, alright?"

"Yes," she answered softly. I stared down at her, her eyes closed, a small, wise smile, that jet black hair enveloping her porcelain face, and knew that I had to do this, even if it hurt me, even if it hurt her, even if it broke the life that we led, just to know where everything went wrong.

The paper fluttered over the trees, under the clouds, between people's legs, with the birds, across the universe...

{WHAT IS THIS

ANOTHER CHAPTER WOW

so i wrote part of it weeeeks ago and only now (roughly) figured out where I'm going with the story

it seems like the end is nigh but don't you worry guys I'll be stretching this story out until I'm 64 (teehee)

sooooo I tried to get Paul McCartney tickets but they sold out immediately :/

hopefully Sir Macca will return for another tour and I can get tickets then

my chorus teacher is going though so I'm happy for her

what else happened...? OH Vinyl ended and the public hated it and HBO fired their main writer/creator and I don't know what the fuss was about because I LOVED the show. Maybe it's because I'm obsessed with classic rock and not the actual direction and stuff, but I was infatuated with the show and I hope that the second season will redeem itin the public eye. If you haven't seen it PLEASE DO because I would love other opinions!

that's about it :) keep smiling you guys!

Enjoy your day/noon/night!

PEACE AND LOVE L***}