A large garden with a beautiful fence beheld my sight. We still had a long way to cross to reach the Manor. A large stone beside the Gates were craved exotically with the words.         'Dar-al-Maqamah'

I sighed typically. The irony of my life frantically demanding an escape.
I have to tell him.

I placed my hand on his right shoulder, I closed my eyes.
Heaviness

"Al-Souffian " I gathered all the courage in me.

"Yes Ladyship? "

"I am sorry, Your father  passed away this morning ..."

I let the words mix with smokey fog in the air, the advanced blues. I,stared his reflection in the front mirror. He stared back mine. His mouth half open, eyes wrinkled, his sonorous shoulders fall.

The vehicle halted at the entrance. My heart pounded in my chest. I stepped out again with uncertainty. The same uncertainty when I first came here.

I opened the front door.
Expecting the experience to happen. He would not get out.
He would not listen.
Cold stone like.
Rock solid.
Unavailable.
Numb.

I stood on the stripping cold of Dar-Al-Maqamah again, now against it.

I gestured the driver to leave. I sat on my knees.

"Al-Souffian, life is such. People leave, we all have to"

There was the Neutral.

For a few minutes the breeze welcomed us. Then, Al-Hassan came to us.

He silently stood numb himself staring his older brother mimicking the actions of the condition.

I did not knew what to do.

"Al-Hassan? " I said beating the nerves.

"You should..... You should go inside Falaq-Naaz" he said,his left eye tearing up.

But now I was use to taking care of Al-Souffian alone. I forgot that his brothers were better at the work than I. I could not move, I thought speedy thoughts of him.

I heard Fateh.

He called my name from the window, from Al-Wildan's room.

My mind snapped the last twig.  Al-Wildan!

I ran upstairs and opened the door. He bursted into tears in my arms.
I cried embracing the pain.

"Oh father!  He is gone Miss Falaq-Naaz " he cried losing to bits.

Life..... Life and it's weariness.

I kissed his cheek and consoled him. I saw Al-Shizad pretending the pseudo strongness.

"Come here" I said and he too allowed himself fall to pieces in the embrace.

"oh Father!" they cried.

They sobbed and sighed.
They held themselves individually first, then each other. The sibling love.

After Asr,the funeral practices started.
The grave was being dug.
The brown soil procured from the depth to make a home for the man who lived in the Royal Mansion to now live in a wet,dirty,suffocating grave.
Seven feet deep where there is no life for breaths,I saw from a distance the Mighty Man, the father of five, the owner of Dar-Al-Maqamah, the cruel but Father... Father of the Elahim Brothers returned to his eternal home.

"I forgive you" my eyes bled the tears of his injustice "I forgive you Mr Elahim for everything. May Allah grant you Jannah"

You heal with forgiveness.

I sat with Mrs Kasheefa but could not speak.

Death. The horrifying death. It kills one but kills all. For a moment yet,it's effect is on every soul. Indeed I will come to you; it reminds.

I sighed.
No one slept the night.
I roamed the hollow mansion witnessing it's ruin in every single thing. It's tall flexible pillars, it's morbid paintings, it's cravings and sculptures......everything.

The morning is early here as always, like in hurry to heal the ruins of darkness with light.

I opened the door of the living room. Vacantly staring at me back.

The breakfast was set. The large Head table empty.

My grandma exceptionally sweet today disgusts me. My father was rather sad. His friend died. It was a natural death.

Deaths are always natural.

The breakfast table longed for people till the noon. The meal was exchanged with lunch.

I saw Al-Hassan entering,his hands in hands of Al-Wildan and Al-Shizad.

Admiration.

"Miss Falaq-Naaz, please serve them, they have not even eaten a morsel of bread since yesterday morning" he said to me.

I spoon fed the twins. The beautiful fraternal twins. The sad twins.
The fatherless children. The motherless children.

"Al-Hassan" I called, taking a spoonful of soup to his lips.

He gulped, his eyes filled with water, I shook my head.

He swallowed silently.

"where is Al-Souffian? " I asked not able to stop thinking of him.

"He is with brother Al-Wais " he answered.

I took the lunch to Al-Wais's room.
Four out of five.

"it is ME " I breathed at the warm wooden door.

He unlocked the door.
My first instinct was to fall in his arms and cry out all the pain of these Eleven months but his eyes were fixed to the floor and his father's challenging speech was still alive.

"Al-Souffian, lunch" I placed the food in front of him.

"Get. Out" he said piquing.

I left.
But then turned and said over my shoulder "Al-Wais please eat your meal"

I locked myself in Al-Souffian's room.
He could not heal but I could deteriorate.

I looked out the window, the soft signature breeze of Maqamah, the howling wind, the sweet smell of the garden, the sight of Foxgloves.

The voilet melted into the orange and pink sky and morning established the supremacy for another Day.

"Tea " I handed a cuppa to Al-Hassan.

"Thank you"

"You handled it really well. If you would not have been so strong,the rest of them would have been further weakened "

He did notreciprocate.

I held the Scarlett letter from the edge of the white table, the shade of Gazebo lighting up the hue.

"You miss her? " I asked.

"I miss you " he replied.

I immediately rejected him and walked far away from him.

I sat in the Front Garden.
Al-Wildan and Al-Shizad healing.

"it is going to be alright, pray to Almighty that your Father acquires Jannah, we are all going to leave, it is our eternal home" I consoled

But sometimes condolence is not what you need. Sometimes you need the dead person alive and nothing else. Simple.  They were in the uncomfortable and inconvenience of the situation Death creates.
I have been there.
All I wanted was Mother.
All they want is their Father.

A week passed.

I was worried of Al-Souffian but I rarely encountered him. He was always with Al-Wais and Al-Wais was my fear.

His countenance reminded me of the past.
He was the embodiment of unfaithfulness. He was the shattered trust. The invalid Love of mine.
The invaluable Man.
The ever Royal... The ever silent death of me.

"The children are orphaned now" Mrs Kasheefa repeated.

"how? " I said rather sharpely.

"Oh Ladyship... "

"I am their Mother. I love them like my own  children. Like I love Fateh, I love Al-Wildan and Al-Shizad " I stated firmly.

"But Al-Hassan and Al-Wais? " said the skinny new maid.

I looked away.

"Ladyship, are you expecting a child? " she asked as I saw Al-Hassan halt at the kitchen door to the words.

I looked at him and he looked at me. Our eyes fixed .

"Yes" I said sadly.

He shook his head. My heart weeping to the mistake.

"you should take care of yourself " she said inspecting the paleness.

"Al-Hassan wait" I caught him.

We walked to the the Garden.

"Al-Hassan, I am sorry. Please forgive  me" I pleaded.

"I am sorry Ladyship but I am drowning in poverty to ever forgive her Ladyship! I cannot afford to pay you forgiveness " he skinned me with his words.

"I am still Falaq-Naaz. Your friend...remember? " I said leaning towards him.

"I only remember you choosing Al-Souffian and humiliating me in your house. I only remember you correcting my words, Ladyship "

"I was a mess.  I am heartily sorry for everything " I begged.

"Do you think I had not forgiven you? Even if I say I will not? " his sight returns to me.

"Thank you"

"You are so cruel Miss Falaq-Naaz, you can do all wrong and I still cannot be angry at you,
What have you done, that what is mine cannot have any control of mine over it. That even my apologies are yours... To give, to take, everything is you" he speaks of it in vex.

I smiled while a few drops of tears were tamely restricted at time.

"Ladyship, what are you doing here? " the Silver Souffian grips my arm.

"Al-Souffian, you left the room" I smiled.

"Of course, you cannot mourn for what is not yours" he spoke tensely.

His head wrapped with a white band. His eyes drained.

"Shall we head to our room Ladyship? You look tired" he moves my hair away from my face with both of his hands.

Al-Hassan walks furiously from the side.

"What happened? " Al-Souffian comprehends the visible angst.

"We should.... I feel dizzy" I covered my head pretending or distracting.

We sat in Al-Souffian's room. The now stripped of darkness and leather, of his scent and the identity. The room of Al-Souffian no longer like him.
The strangeness of the flooring, the smell of wooden pile and paint.
His eyes finding his Haq.
He looked at the hollow bedroom and unable to find himself, he said
"This place no longer belongs to me. My father made this decision. I cannot be here anymore. If he wished for me to abandon this room. I must never come here. Sleep well Ladyship, I must not join you"

He left the door half open, half closed.
Similar to the heart I have.

Author's note :How are you girls?
I hope everyone is having a good day. If not, it gets better. Write me all you feel. Let's talk?