OT7 winners have arrived!

Congrats to all the winners!

Please do not be discouraged if you are not on here. If you have any questions about what I thought about your story, please message me and I will discuss your story with you!

I will be distributing prizes soon, after I announce some more winners for the Fairy Night Awards so I can do them all at once.

3rd Place

The Stars of the Galaxies by MagicChim

Thoughts:

Characters: 7/10. I really like Taehyung and his inclusion in the story. Taehyung has a certain charm to him that makes me want to see more of him, and I think his dialogue is the best. I also like how he interacts with Jimin and their overall dynamic. They have a lot of history, and I like how both of them seem lonely, and much of that is thanks to Jimin. It gives Jimin a flaw and Taehyung's reaction to it shows what kind of person he is. I like how their relationship is handled.

The relationship I didn't care for as much was Rachel and Jimin's since it felt forced, in my opinion. In their introduction, Rachel acts differently than she is characterized. She's injured and alone with Jimin on his ship with no hope of escape and she mentally says she doesn't know if she can trust him, but she doesn't really react much to his sexual advances. Despite being characterized as someone who is used to being in danger (so she knows what it's like), no alarm bells go off after he says he doesn't need her to be unconscious to get her naked. Do you see why that feels a bit contradictory to how she was characterized? I understand she's a strong fighter so maybe she isn't scared, but she didn't have much reaction whatsoever even though he's very obviously hiding something and 90% of his dialogue with her up until that point has been making sexual advances on her.

Later, Taehyung believes Jimin is in love with her when their relationship hasn't developed much since then. We don't know much about these characters as individuals let alone as two people potentially in a relationship. This is where some pacing issues come in. The moment where Jimin goes back for Rachel in the hospital is cute, but not enough to warrant them to be super attached to each other. They kiss by chapter four, but by then we don't know anything about their dynamic, so when Jimin and Rachel admit they're falling for each other, it makes the readers wonder why. They don't know anything about one another yet other than small things like Rachel hates hospitals.

I feel slowing down and showing more of Rachel's recovery/her dynamic with Jimin during that period could have been very beneficial. As is, the kiss feels like it comes out of nowhere and wasn't supposed to happen for another four to five chapters. I'm fine with the "love at first sight" aspect, especially since it's established that Jimin is lonely, but for me to believe their relationship and want to see them together, I need to see why they work together and why they like one another. Outside of the physical attraction and Jimin deciding not to leave her in the hospital alone, I didn't see much reason.

So when I break it down like that, does it make sense why Rachel and Jimin's relationship felt forced? We (readers) didn't know much about them as individuals let alone together, hence why it was a little hard to believe their relationship and how much they liked each other after minimal conversations, especially when most of those conversations were Jimin making sexual advances. They don't actually get to know each other until after they kiss. Do you see why that could be a problem? Especially when you had a chance to show them getting to know each other during Rachel's hospital stay?

As the story goes on, I like them more as individuals and I think all the characters have very unique personalities, and I also like Starlight, or Astra's, inclusion in this. It's just for those beginning parts, it was hard to believe Jimin and Rachel's relationship, and it was also hard to connect with Rachel due to some inconsistent characterization.

I still overall like the characters, but since Rachel and Jimin are a core part of the story, I have to judge accordingly.

Plot: 10/10. Though I do have some criticisms for the pacing, the pacing impacts the characters in this case and not the plot. The plot itself is very strong and I think it flows well. There's a lot of mystery and it fits with the world and characters. Overall I have no criticisms for the plot and I think it was well-made.

Worldbuilding: 10/10. It seems like worldbuilding is this author's strong point. Based on the works I've read by them, their worlds always stand out as interesting and well-developed. I have no criticisms for this world. It's inventive, feels alive, and has its own unique locations that impact the plot/characters in meaningful ways.

Pacing: 7/10. Sometimes how much time passed was unclear. For example, in chapter 2 when Rachel is getting surgery. The text says she's getting prepped for surgery, but a few lines later she's already out of surgery with no mention or implication to how much time passed. I know it's the future and I'm not expecting surgery to take as long, but for my foot operation, it took six hours. And that was a meticulously planned operation with one of the best surgeons in my state. If a planned operation on a lower body part that wasn't in immediate danger took a long time, do you see why I'd find it a little hard to believe that an unplanned operation on a much more vital part of the human body that was in immediate danger would be finished in a handful of lines?

I'm fine with it if surgery doesn't take as long (and I'm not expecting it to in the far future), but if that's the case, it would have been nice to see a clear passage of time or an explanation. It feels like there was no transition between Jimin paying the bills and Rachel getting out of surgery. It kind of just happened, if that makes sense.

I mentioned it in the character section, but there were times I felt you could have slowed down and developed the characters more before these big action scenes or intense moments. Skipping over Rachel's two-day hospital stay hurt the relationship between her and Jimin since that core development stage was skipped. They're just getting to know each other and you skipped over that, which led to the kiss feeling a bit forced.

The pacing was otherwise good, it's just the characters felt underdeveloped at times because some character moments were skipped over, if that makes sense.

Themes: 9/10. There are many different emotions and themes at play in this that make the novel engaging and fun to read. I was immersed in the storyline and how the themes came to light. The only thing, and it's minor, is the pacing. I already explained above so I won't restate what's already been said, though if there was a little more time spent with the characters in those core beginning chapters, I feel the themes would have developed a bit smoother.

Consistency: 8/10. There are tense issues where the text flip flops between past and present tense incorrectly. I felt there were inconsistencies with how Rachel was characterized versus how she acted around Jimin. I didn't notice any plot inconsistencies.

Creativity: 10/10. I have no criticisms for the creativity in this story. I like to say I am a self-appointed sci-fi expert, and as the self-appointed sci-fi expert, I must say all the creativity and new ideas in this book are great. There were creative environments, creative names, creative language, and so on.

Grammar/spelling: 7.5/10. There are some capitalization errors where you'll capitalize words even when they aren't proper nouns or starting the sentence. For example, you capitalize "he" a lot even though he isn't a proper noun (I'm talking about when "he" isn't starting the sentence).

Dialogue tags are put below the dialogue, which is incorrect. They should be next to the dialogue. From chapter 3, Starlight, the dialogue Tae says is this: "I love that tune you made for us."

Taehyung said.

It should be: "I love that tune you made for us," Taehyung said.

Try to refrain from using all caps unless they're the name of something (like HYBE or BTS). They're hard to read and come off as you, the author, screaming at us, the audience.

I mentioned in the Namjoon category that there were ellipse issues. The same issues are here too, though they weren't as noticeable or frequent, and ellipses were done correctly many times.

Cover and blurb: 6.5/10. I like the font for the "Galaxies" and "Stars." The cover doesn't particularly stand out to me, though. It feels a bit plain because it's a popular pic of BTS with text around it. I would've liked to see more creativity considering this is a space AU and there's a lot you can do with that. For example, maybe try using the colors associated with galaxies (purples and blues) and creating a cover based on that. Maybe you can take that picture of BTS, cut them out of it, then paste the cut-outs to a background more space-like, if that makes sense.

It's a BTS AU so I understand wanting to use all seven of them, but it could be worth it to use one or two of the members and focus on creating a very galaxy-inspired cover. Those are just a couple of ideas, but I encourage you to play around with it!

The ellipse at the end of the blurb feels a bit unnecessary. The blurb is a little confusing but not because of all the new concepts, but rather some of the writing. For example, "...Saviors from across the Universe came to the aid of Humanity and made them of their own." Their own what? It's a little confusing what you mean by that, and I would recommend being more specific. Did you mean "...and made them one of their own," referring to a new planet or universe? See how it's a little unclear?

I still overall like the blurb, I would just recommend tightening up the word choice a bit to help readers understand.

Total: 75/90.

Letter grade: B+

2nd Place

Till That Strange Spring by butterflys_effect

Thoughts:

Characters: 10/10. The character work is really well done. You learn so much about Jimin in only two chapters, but at the same time, it doesn't feel bloated. The new things we learn about him develop at the same time the plot is moving. We get to know Jimin on a very personal level, and you establish his wants and internal conflicts very early in the story, which is great.

The most Jimin thing I've ever seen is Jimin getting offended someone touches his hair without his permission then he makes a plan to punch them in the face but ends up screaming instead. That's just... yeah, Jimin.

Sorry, hang on.

Ahem. Gimme two secs.

*clears throat*

PINK HAIRED JIMINNNNN 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭😏😏😏😏🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😩😩😩😩😩🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤👅👅👅👅👅👅👅

Excuse me, sorry. I'm a PJMs, I'm legally obligated to do that. Don't mind me.

Back on topic.

His sister is the same way. Ji Ah receives a lot of attention, and I love her dialogue and the way she talks. Like when she said, "You went all jangjang mangmang bongbong with him then, and now you are scared to talk." I giggled at that and thought that was such an iconic line.

Jin is Jin. I don't need to explain myself.

I liked Yoongi, and I also really liked his introduction and how he literally rapped all the info about himself. There are a lot of characters so I won't comment on each one, but every character introduction is done well, and their developments are done well too.

I have no criticisms for the characters, all of them are great, stand on their own, and make their mark on the story.

Plot: 10/10. When I think of fantasy, this is certainly not what I think of. When the first chapter mentioned Hong Kong and Brazil, I audibly said "Wait, this is fantasy?" Then I kept reading and said, "Oh, this is fantasy." It was really interesting how you played with my expectations and the overall expectations that comes with the "fantasy" genre.

Or maybe I'm just an idiot who doesn't read much fantasy so that's why I was taken aback. I live in New York. That's as close to living under a rock as I can get.

Anyway.

The plot is very fantastical while still incorporating elements of real life that make sense and move the plot along at a steady pace. There were no plot holes that I noticed, which is important for fantasy stories in particular since they're dealing with so many new world elements that having confusion in the plot can turn readers off the story.

Worldbuilding: 10/10. I don't think I really need to explain myself here lol, but I will anyway. The world is rich and diverse, and you make it clear where the characters are. The fantastical side of the world is fleshed out and makes sense, but the earthly stuff is fleshed out too, making the story well-rounded. I have no criticisms for the worldbuilding in the book, and I think you did an excellent job bringing this fantasy to life.

Pacing: 10/10. The pacing is smooth and flows evenly. You don't go too fast or too slow. The characters have their chance to shine, and so does the plot. You have a nice balance between the two, so by the time the later chapters and conflicts unfold, we're attached to the characters and also what's going on in the plot. That allows the themes, characters, and plot to feel fully developed. No Criticisms.

Themes: 10/10. I knew you were gonna give us some heavy emotional stuff as soon as I started reading. Jimin's character is my favorite, and no, it's not just because he's Jimin, shush. The emotional backstory he has and the connection he has with his sister is very thought-provoking and relatable. It directly ties into all the themes the story has, and I thought all the emotions were executed well, but particularly Jimin and Ji Ah's. No criticisms.

Consistency: 8.5/10. There are consistent tense issues where it flop flops between past and present tense. I didn't notice any plot or character inconsistencies.

Creativity: 8.5/10. The story idea is very creative and the word choice is fun to read. I only have one criticism about the sentences.

There are some awkward sentences here and there.

Here's an example of an awkward sentence:

"Jimin may think that she doesn't know what was going in his head. But she does. Because she had been with him for almost twenty-one years."

This section feels a bit too split, if that makes sense. I feel this could have been only one or two sentences instead of three. Here's one example: "Jimin may think she didn't know what went on in his head, but she did; she had been with him for almost twenty-one years." I also cut some of the words out to make it flow a bit stronger.

I would recommend reading sentences out loud or putting them through TTS to see how they sound. I personally use TTS and it helps a lot.

Grammar/spelling: 7.5/10. Dialogue tags are done incorrectly. Dialogue tags, unless they are a proper noun, need to be lowercase. If you are using a dialogue tag, the dialogue cannot end in a period.

For example, from the first chapter:

"I am your teacher now." She mumbled...

What it should be:

"I am your teacher now," she mumbled.

Sometimes you put dialogue spoken by different people in the same paragraph. Make sure every time a new person is speaking, they get their own space to speak.

I would recommend not using all caps since they can be hard to read and come off as you, the author, screaming at us, the audience.

Also, for flow, since Jimin and her are brother and sister, you could benefit from incorporating more contractions into their speech to make the sentences sound more natural. They're close enough that they can use informal talk around each other. That's just a nitpick though.

Cover and blurb: 6.5/10. The "Strange Spring" is a bit hard to read because of the branch in the way. I like the concept and overall execution of the cover otherwise. The colors are great, the flowers are nice and fit the "spring" feel you were going for, and the picture of Jimin was well-chosen.

The blurb is too long and doesn't really go anywhere. I don't know what the story is about after reading it. I don't know the characters, the plot, or the setting. I only know the theme. I would not have known it was a fantasy story if "FANTASY AU" wasn't at the bottom of the blurb. It's more of a philosophical blurb than one that tells readers about the story. I would recommend being more specific with the blurb and giving the readers information about what the story will be about in terms of its plot, characters, and setting.

Total: 81/90.

Letter grade: A

1st Place

Body & Soul by 4everSherlocked

Thoughts:

Characters: 9/10. Laylin, Jungkook, and Taehyung are such well-defined characters with clear traits and interesting personalities/struggles. Jungkook and Laylin's dynamic is engaging and super fun to read. Jihope are charming characters who added more to the story than I was expecting them to. All of them are unique from one another, contribute to the plot in meaningful ways, and interact with each other in an immersive manner that kept me entertained throughout.

I believe I mentioned this in a past review, but some of the dialogue felt expository, mostly in the beginning when we're getting to know the plot/characters. One line is: "I'm twenty five, thank you very much. I'm the same age as you nummy." There's no reason for Laylin to repeat her own age when Jungkook and her are best friends. He knows her age and he knows they're the same age, so it's clear she's only saying that line for the audience's purpose, making it expository dialogue.

It also has some grammar errors. Here's the alternative: "I'm twenty-five, thank you very much. I'm the same age as you, nummy." Twenty-five needs a hyphen and since "nummy" is non-essential information to the sentence, it needs a comma before it.

However, the expository dialogue is a nitpick since there aren't too many cases of it.

Plot: 10/10. The plot was straightforward and easy to follow. Body swaps can sometimes get confusing, but I didn't find myself confused throughout the story. I noticed no plot holes, either. No criticisms, therefore the perfect score is well-deserved.

Worldbuilding: 10/10. The world feels fleshed out and real to the point that even the movie theatre Jungkook goes to at the beginning of the story feels like my local AMC. All of the environments are fun and interact well with the characters. No criticisms.

Pacing: 10/10. It's easy to mess up pacing, but I thought you had solid pacing throughout. You start off with the character introductions and get us introduced to our main characters, then you introduce the central conflict of the body swap, then you keep moving smoothly after that. The characters felt very real, and in general, your characters always feel real and like they could be my friends if they weren't fictional. As always, excellent work.

Themes: 10/10. Chapter 57 is easily my favorite in the entire story due to the emotional rush you feel as Jungkook rushes after Laylin, and when he says "I told you I'd be right back," I was laughing, smiling, and on the verge of tears because that was such a nice callback and a well-placed line. Overall, the emotions and themes are well-made and executed in an easy to understand way.

Consistency: 10/10. I noticed no consistent tense issues, OOC moments, or inconsistencies with the plot. No criticisms.

Creativity: 10/10. The story is very creative both in concept and execution. The word choice was unique and I didn't notice much repetition, at least not enough to warrant me taking points of or talking about it. The story idea was presented to us in a fun way that was easy to follow (as I mentioned before). I have no criticisms for the creativity.

Grammar/spelling: 8.5/10. The grammar is pretty good aside from some small things, like semicolon misuse. Sometimes you use them in place of commas when semicolons and commas are not interchangeable. For example: "She turned the burner off as she plated it; Jungkook getting up from the island to go into the living room where he had left his laptop the night before." The semicolon should be a comma.

Another small thing is some capitalization for the dialogue, but it's only in one very specific dialogue situation so I'm only gonna take off 0.5 for it. It's this (from chapter 57): "You're lucky we're friends," said Laylin, "And that you're on the phone right now."

If you are using a comma and continuing the dialogue like that, then it needs to be lowercase since it is a continuation of the previous line and not a new line. Okay, that's a word sandwich, but I'll show you what I mean: "You're lucky we're friends," said Laylin, "and that you're on the phone right now."

Since the "and that you're on the phone right now" is a continuation of the "You're lucky we're friends now," the "and" needs to be lowercase unless you are using a period after the tag. So like this: "You're lucky we're friends," said Laylin. "And that you're on the phone right now." 

When connecting two parts of dialogue using commas, the second part is lowercase. That's a very specific case and the only part of dialogue that was done incorrectly, hence why I'm not taking off much for it.

Cover and blurb: 7.5/10. I have minor critiques for both the cover and blurb but overall like both.

The cover stands out and is unique. I personally am not the biggest fan of the color scheme because of how many colors there are, but it undoubtedly makes the cover stand out, so I'm not going to be too picky about that. The only main critique I have is the & symbol is small and hard to see, and honestly I didn't see the need for it. I feel the cover could flow better without the presence of the & at all. I know it's part of the title so that may be a strange suggestion, but in a way, I feel like Jungkook and Taehyung's positions on the cover kind of make the & symbol.

The blurb starts strong, my one and only critique is that it ends very abruptly and I would like to know a little more. It feels like it's missing two or three sentences that flesh out the last sentence of the current blurb. I would recommend writing another one to three sentences just to give a short explanation for what's about to happen and what's at stake. The blurb establishes the plot and characters well, all I'm saying is maybe another one to three sentences just to expand on that final idea you raised in the last sentence.

Total: 85/90.

Letter grade: A

Honorable Mentions:

Best World... Miss Undercover by winterawrr

Judge Comments: I like the worldbuilding in this story. Places are specific and given names, Seoul is treated like an actual place, and there are many hard truths about living in Seoul (such as the cost of living). I'm glad the author didn't shy away from the worldbuilding and made Seoul feel more alive. It ties in with the plot and it actually impacts what the characters do and think. That's how you properly do worldbuilding, and the author scored a well-deserved 10/10 in that category.

Best Concept... BTS Members as Love Tropes by knjwritess

Judge Comments: I was surprised that each member got their own little storyline. I was expecting a oneshot compilation, but I got developed stories that had their own unique spins on them. Not to mention the concept of putting the BTS members under love tropes was interesting and fun to read about. All in all a fun read!

Congratulations everyone. I hope to judge MYG and PJM next. I will likely close the JHS and KSJ categories soon since they are just about full and I want to judge them.