It's been five hours since I've been sitting on this bench, writing and enjoying the peace gifted by this undiscovered strip of beach.

My phone rang like ten times, but I gracefully ignored it because I knew I had to leave everything aside and finish the new chapter.

I also knew that it was Julian whom I left dumbfounded at the Uni but right now I have to finish this and publish it, at least for that one single reader who always shows up minutes after the chapter is uploaded.

I give it one more check and hit the publish button. And like every evening, two minutes after it's live that reader appears, the same reader as always, as if she or he is waiting for it.

Rather she, I doubt a male reader is waiting to dive into my juicy love stories.

I smile, pleased to see my writings don't go unnoticed and I stand up on my feet, ready to close the day and make my way home.

As I'm approaching the building of my flat I see light in my apartment and I sigh, shaking my head, manning up to face my brother.

"So, you're not dead," Julian says when I enter, making me puff with annoyance.

"No, I'm not dead, and unfortunately I'm not surprised to see you here," I reply while tossing my shoes and bag somewhere on the floor of the living room on my way to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water.

I was so lost in my writing tonight that I forgot my need for fluids and food.

"Oh, hey Mia," Ben says with a full mouth, sitting on the island counter and feeding himself some cake.

"Are you too married or something?" I ask after emptying the bottle and I fetch a lollipop from the glass bowl.

"You're mean," Ben scolds me. "We've been worried sick. Where have you been? Don't you have a phone or what? It's one thing to be distant and a different one to be rude."

"I do have a phone, and it's none of your business where I have been," I reply crashing on the sofa next to Julian who grabs the opportunity to mess with my hair, ruffling it again.

"I brought your mail up," he says, and I shift my eyes toward him, wondering why that is so important to mention.

"So? You want a reward or something?" I ask.

"Well, depends on what's written in the letter stamped with the college logo," he clarifies.

"The college...?" I mumble surprised, standing on my feet to go and fetch the envelope, rushing to open it with shaky hands.

The contest I've enrolled in is the most important event of the year. I've been waiting for three full years to be eligible for it. It's the perfect launching place for any designer who dreams of a career because the sponsors are some of the biggest construction and architecture companies across the States and being a winner is ensuring you some of the best projects in the industry.

I seem to have trouble controlling the trembling of my hands while I struggle to open the envelope and I walk towards the windows, facing the scenery outside and thinking that it's better to hide my disappointment in case I haven't been accepted.

Why these diplomatic, politically correct beginnings of official letters are so long and boring? Where is it? Where is the damn result?

I take a deep breath, blocking the air in my lungs, and once I read the words "we would like to take this opportunity and congratulate you for..." I exhaled loudly and let myself be flushed by a blissful joy, invading my brain and my chest in a whirlpool of adrenaline.

"I got it..." I mumble.

"What?" Julian asks standing up and rushing towards me, pulling the letter from my hand to read it himself.

"I'm in. I've been accepted," I clarify turning around and meeting his face changing colors and blooming while reading the acceptance letter by himself.

"Wow, Mia! That's amazing! I mean, not that I didn't trust you're good enough but damn, this is the hardest contest in the States," he tries to justify his reaction.

"I know. And I'm in! Oh, my God, I'm in the contest! Uhu!" I finally unleash my joy, raising my arms and curling them around Ben's neck who lifts me and makes a few spins while my legs fly in the air.

"Now, this is a good reason to call Papa. He'll be really happy," Julian tries his luck but before I have the chance to protest and scold him for grabbing the event to make an excuse and push me to call Papa, my phone rings, and we all freeze.

Don't ask me how, but we all know it's Papa calling, without even checking the phone.

I look at Julian who stares back at me, begging him with my eyes to make it right, to do some shitty magic and stop the phone ringing.

"Sorry, kid," he says instead, shrugging his shoulders.

I yank myself from Ben's arms and walk towards where I've left my bag, pulling the phone out and reading Papa's name on the screen.

He's not giving up, the phone is still ringing so I drag the green button on the screen and place the phone at my ear, in defeat.

"Ciao, Papa," I say. (Hello, Dad).

"Ciao, Principessa. Come stai?" he asks in an evidently forced sweet tone. (Hello princess. How are you?).

"I'm good, Papa. How about you?" I reply making my way to the bedroom where I can have a proper private conversation.

I have a hunch this won't turn out pretty.

"Well, I could be better if my eldest daughter had the decency to call, or to visit, or to pick up when her mother calls," he replies in a tone that gradually goes deeper and I can already vision him sitting at the desk if his home office, surrounded by the dim lights and the smoke of his cigar.

"Papa, ti prego..." I try to sweeten his mood. (Dad, please...).

"Prego che, principessa? Cos'è che mi stai chiedendo? Essere pazientare? Smetti di chiamare? Dimentica che ho una figlia? Quale è questa volta, Emillia?" he finally starts shouting in an attempt to make me feel embarrassed for forgetting about my parents. (What are you asking me? To be patient? Stop calling? Forget I have a daughter? Which is it this time, Emillia?).

"Papa, stop talking Italian with me! Please, stop... being... who you are!" I finally shouted, closing the door behind me.

"Who am I, Emillia? I'm only asking you to stop distancing yourself from us, from a father's heart, I'm asking you to..." he becomes softer and halts his words when I hear Mamma Eve in the background.

"Is it Mia?" she says in her always and forever sweetness that has never let me hate her.

I know she is the one to have taken me away from my mother, by force, years back. And while I'm grateful to her for offering me a life filled with comfort and opportunities and infinite love and knowing very well that my mother hasn't been particularly good, I still believe some visits wouldn't have hurt anyone.

"Okay," I replied, defeated.

I haven't been home for more than a year and I surely don't want papa's men to come and fetch me by force.

And I miss them, I really do.

"Okay what, tesoro?" he asks, expecting exactly nothing good from me. (Sweetheart).

"I'm coming home for a week, with Julian. He's here, with me," I clarify my words, feeling surprisingly good and anxious to see them.

"Can you say that again? I'm putting you on speaker," he requests while he laughs and changes his mood in a millisecond.

"I'm coming home tonight, for a week, if you promise to stop being such a drama queen. You too, Mamma Eve," I say in a joke knowing for sure that I'm on speaker so she can hear me, too.

"I told you, stop giving the poor girl a hard time. Of course, she is coming home!" mamma Eve says while I giggle at her sweet way of scolding Papa.

"And... I have news," I complete, causing a pretty tiny pause from the both of them.

"Good news?" Papa finally asks.

"Hm, pretty good," I reply without giving them any hint.

My head snaps towards the door when I hear it opening and I see Julian coming in with my traveling bag, completely ignoring me and walking straight to my walk-in closet where he starts shoving things in it. My things.

"Don't mind me packing here, sis. We have hardly over one hour to catch a free runway to take off," he explains.

"What flight?" I ask him in awe, wondering when the hell has he had the time to make a reservation.

"I sent him with my private jet, Mia, and I guess it's ready," Papa replies instead.

"With you're jet?! How did you know I would agree to come home?!" I ask in a pitched voice.

"I see you're still underestimating me, principessa," Papa replies becoming cold again, the mafia head he has always been, expecting everybody to drop on their knees when asked and imposing his ever "my way or my way" to everyone. (Princess).

"Papa..." I tried to say but he suddenly stopped me.

"Emillia, io sono quello che sono e tu sei quello che sei, principessa e questo comporta un pericolo, un pericolo che ho cercato di proteggerti da tutta la mia vita. Ora, sei una brava ragazza e torna a casa. Questa è la mia ultima gentile richiesta," he gives me his final warning and I know that from now on I have only one solution, to run away. (I am who I am, and you are who you are, princess and that comes with danger, a danger I have been trying to protect you from all my life. Now, be a good girl and come home. This is my final kind request).

"I see," I reply, something that he doesn't like by the deep hum he blows in the phone reaching straight to my ears and freezing the blood in my veins.

"See you later, principessa," he concludes and hangs up. (Princess).

I slowly drop the hands and the phone in my lap with my mind already knitting a way out.

I'll give them this week, only one week, then I'll come back and work on my project for the contest.

And then...

"You're ready, sis?" Julian asks pulling me out of my thoughts and making me turn some empty eyes towards him.

I hardly manage to bring myself back from the call I've had with Papa but soon I become responsive, standing up and turning off the lights on my way out of the room while following Julian like a puppy.

Ben stands tall at the front door, waiting for both of us to be ready to leave. His eyes stare at me and maybe some other woman would have found nothing in those olive-black eyes but trust me, the way he deeply stares at me speaks volumes. That's how I know he has something to say.

"We will surely be late, Mia! Come on, sis," Julian insists, stressed about being late.

Yes, it is Papa's airplane but it's not Papa's airport, he used to scold me whenever I was making them late when traveling.

I open my mouth, wanting to give him nicely because it's enough they're forcing me to do something I don't want to, he doesn't have to be a jerk in the process, but before I have the chance to lash at him, Ben curls his bulky arms around my neck and pulls me in a strong hug, placing his lips at my ear.

"I'll come with you wherever you want to go, sweetie. Just give them this week," he whispers, and I exhale long, squeezing my eyes tight and thanking the heavens for having Ben in my life.

He plants and kisses my temple and we both exit my flat with Julian following us closely.

Luckily, the airport is not far from my place, so we are already on the way to the runway where the jet is waiting.

Julian tried to make small talk while driving here but I was so lost in my thoughts that I hardly heard a sentence or two, so he got stuck with Ben as a chatting companion, saying nothing that I cared about.

But now, being already on the flight, it's just him and I in perfect silence. I don't want him to come with me to Italy. I want Ben.

Ben is nice. Ben is not watching me every minute of the day like I'm some kind of a state treasure.

Not that I have things to hide but they are all suffocating me with their care, watch, and enormous amount of caution.

Danger is all I've heard about my entire life. Guns, rivalry, revenge, and hiding in estates that are known only to us.

I want to breathe. I want to be far from them and far from whatever disgusting luxury life we have but for which the prices we pay are much higher than I'm willing to pay.

"We'll take off in fifteen minutes, sis," Julian says once we are in our seats with safety belts on and drinks already in front of us.

"Great..." I mumble, totally unmoved.

He leans against the backrest of his chair, staring at me in expectation, waiting for me to probably snap.

But I choose to keep cool, shifting my eyes to the window in the hope of a good sleep, not that I'm tired, but I truly am not up for any kind of talk.

"I remember when we were kids," Julian says and I roll my eyes, which he ignores. What a smart ass!

"I used to be so jealous of you. It felt like the entire family was gravitating around you. Papa was mesmerized each time you were around, and it seemed like nothing else mattered to him," he continues, and his words do nothing but increase my anxiety.

"Julian... come on. How many times do I have to hear these stories?"

Every time he talks like this makes me feel I have a huge debt to pay till it burns to the core of my bones.

"What happened, Mia? Why did you become so estranged lately?" he keeps talking while I feel choked with anger not knowing how to make him stop.

So, I decided to ignore it, and it worked. He didn't speak a word for the rest of the trip, and I fell into a deep sleep, just the way I wanted.

Of course, there is a black SUV waiting for us at the airport and of course, Papa's locker-like men are at the root of the airplane's stairs.

"Welcome home, Miss Emillia," Bruno says when I show up at the top of the stairs and Julian pushes me a little from the back, encouraging me to walk.

"Hey, Bruno," I reply with a small smile while I walk past him and get in the car.

He closes the back door when I'm in and then takes his seat at the steering wheel while Julian sits next to me unlike me, totally uncomfortable being here, watched by Papa's mercenaries, incapable of ever going somewhere unnoticed or unwatched, my brother seems to be in his own comfort zone, like a fish in the sea.

The drive home goes in the same silence as our trip here, the only difference is that this time Julian seems to ignore me and while this is what I've always wished for, I admit it hurts.

I love my little brother and always have, but if this is the way he wants it to be, I won't stop him.

"We're here, Miss Emillia," Bruno stops the train of my thoughts and once the back door is open I can see Mamma Eve and Papa waiting for us at the top of the stairs.

Mamma Eve is tearing up, I can see it from over here, but Papa has a new face this time, straight but without his usual coldness.

I put on a nice smile and got out of the car, walking up the stairs to reach Mamma Eve, and Papa.

"Welcome home, sweetheart," Mamma Eve says and pulls me into a strong hug. "It's so good to have you home, Mia," she mumbles with her face buried into my shoulder.

"Thank you, Mamma. It's good to be home," I reply and once I'm out of her arms I turn towards Papa who seems to have frozen there, next to her.

"Ti aspetto nel mio ufficio," he says and turns aroundentering the house without sparing me any look. (I'm waiting for you in myoffice).

~~~~~
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