SUMMARY: Takes place after postS8/preS9. Lloyd resorts to alcohol to get Harumi out of his mind. WARNING: MENTIONS OF ALCOHOL, MAYBE SWEARING TOO!

1:43 AM

Lloyd sluggishly sauntered down from the bedroom to the luxurious kitchen of the Gordon villa. It was empty...well, not really, since he was there now. Everyone was upstairs, except Misako, who was heading to Stiix, and Pixal, who was at Skylor's.

Switching on the light, he shuffled inside, standing in the middle of the room, unsure of what to do next. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms, generating some heat; it was quite cold in there. Raking a hand through his freshly-washed hair (there were hot showers and they had to take the opportunity), he sighed as he opened the fridge.

There wasn't anything he was craving; mainly just vegan, fat-free, dairy-free, sugar-free stuff that probably tastes like cardboard. He knew Jay had been around here before, so there had to be some snacks laying around, right?

Rummaging through shelves, he didn't have much luck, before spotting a bar of chocolate. His eyes gleamed and his mouth watered, but his face fell as he saw the packaging.

95% COCOA

He wasn't a fan of dark chocolate; it was too bitter for his liking. He caught sight of the mini bar fridge on the other side of the kitchen, resting on the counter beside the sleek, unused toaster. Edging towards it, he carefully opened it, to see it stacked to the brim with a variety of alcoholic beverages.

Glancing around to make sure the coast was clear, he reached in and scooped up an armful of chilled cans and bottles. He didn't care at this point; he just wanted to forget.

Shutting the fridge, he placed the drinks on the table, before sliding onto the bar stool. Gingerly taking a can, he popped it open and took a big gulp, choking it down, before sputtering with a stream of coughs.

Why was it so bitter?! The people on movies made it so easy to consume, so why couldn't he? The beer left a strong, dislikeable taste on his tongue, but after feeling it slide down inside his throat, it felt...good.

He took another sip, then another...and another...and another. With each gulp, the drink got more bearable, and more tasteful. He started to enjoy the feeling of losing himself, as he swallowed the cold liquid. He'd seen the guys drink, but only one can or bottle only on special occasions. He'd never seen Nya or Wu drink.

The first can was empty. The second was gone in seconds. With each drink, he felt more...free...giggly...carefree.

Screw medicine; why not just drink alcohol?

He chuckled to himself as he downed another bottle.

A few bottles later and he was drunk. Not aware of his surroundings, just...blackout drunk.

"Lloyd?"

He aimlessly turned around, to see an awake and alert Nya staring at him, her eyebrows furrowed, arms crossed as she leaned against the wall. She straightened up, before noticing the empty bottles on the counter, "Lloyd..."

"What?" he slurred, "I need this. I have so much shit going on in life...I need this, Nya."

"Lloyd...please don't-"

"Let me have this. For once...let me be Lloyd. Not the prophesied green ninja. Not the guy destined to battle his father. Just me."

Nya could see the heartbreak in his eyes, how shattered he was...how he was trying to keep a brave face but it kept failing.

"I like this feeling." he whispered, "All of you say it's bad but-" he swallowed down saliva, "-it makes me feel good. You should try it." He shakily held up his half-empty bottle, before losing his grip. Nya quickly leapt forward, snatching the bottle before it shattered, and set it back on the counter.

She could smell the alcohol on his breath, as he stared at her, "Why hold onto all this heartbreak? Just...let it go."

"You're drunk, Lloyd." Nya stated, "You need to sober up before Misako comes home-"

"No no no!" He stumbled over his words, "Not yet. No..."

Nya tried to reason with him, "Lloyd, drinking won't make anything better. There are other ways-"

"Well I chose this!" He thundered, his emotions changing immediately. Nya flinched at his sudden outburst, watching the sadness in his eyes turn to anger.

"I like this!" He sobbed, "We'd be with our friends. At home. Laughing over all of this, eating Zane's cooking. We'd be with our friends- no...screw friends...we'd be with our family. How...how are you not affected by any of this? Are you that heartless?"

"Believe me, I'm crushed by all of this. I lost my brother, my boyfriend, my family." Lloyd stared at her, and after what seemed like ages, he finally spoke, 

"Then why don't you let it all go?"

She looked at him sadly, "It just hangs on."

Lloyd nodded; he knew exactly what she meant. Tears rolling down his cheeks, he looked at his teammate, "I just...they were my backbone...I could fall on them, and-and now...I feel alone. If I screw up, I just..." He gulped, trying to find the words.

"But you're not alone. I'm here. Pixal's here. Misako's here. We're all here, Lloyd."

He simply crossed his arms across his body, hugging himself, "But it doesn't feel the same. I wanna-" he started weeping again, "I want it to end. I wanna...I wanna leave."

"Leave where?" Nya asked him gently.

"Away from here...I-I...I wanna just go...I can't...I..." By now Nya had stepped forward, before heading towards him, wrapping her arms around him. Clinging onto her torso, he sobbed into her shoulder, holding on like there was no tomorrow.

He whimpered, hugging her tighter, "I can't take it anymore!"

After all, she was pretty much all the hope he had left.

I sorta ran out of inspiration, so I left it there. This was slightly inspired by that one scene from Outer Banks, where JJ buys a hot tub, and he says how he bought it for his friends, and was like "Screw friends, I got this for my family," and is on the verge of tears, and Kie and Pope just give him a big ol' hug!

I'll put the scene here: (skip to 1:20...or just watch the whole clip...unless you're currently watching it now and don't want spoilers...then don't watch it!)

https://youtu.be/C6XA0OG1cn0