{The Time Lords have logged on} 

Three: I've locked onto the signal! I've almost got a location! 

Four: So  have I! 

Seven: Same! 

Ten: Locked on; do you think they got our message? 

Twelve: We're going anyway. I want to find out who would know how to use Xenphian code, Time Lord or not. 

Eight: It's coming from Earth. 

Eleven: Of course it is... 

Two: England! 

Eleven: Of course it is... 

War: London, England. 

Nine, Ten, and Eleven: OF COURSE IT IS 

Three: A street called...hang on... 

One: Baker Street. 

Nine: Good. Let's get some croissants. 

Ten: You hate croissants! 

Nine: Do not! 

Ten: Do too! 

Nine: Toothpick! 

Ten: Nosey! 

Twelve: Shut it, and set course for Baker Street, London, England, Earth....Now, we can't all go; the paradoxes of us just chatting now are too great. Who volunteers? 

Ten: ME 

Twelve: Okay, fine. Anyone else? 

Eleven: ME!!! MEMEMEMEME 

Twelve: Anyone else? 

Eleven: MEMEMEME-- 

{Twelve has kicked Eleven from the conversation} 

Twelve: Anyone else at all? 

War: I'm a bit busy.

Nine: I've got to deal with an angry Jugaflophis, or we'll have more angry Jugaflophis-es on our hands. 

One: It's only right that I should go. 

Four: I'm coming. 

Six: Me too. 

Two: Me too. 

Twelve: WE CAN'T ALL COME! 

Eight: I volunteer. 

Five: Alright, me too. 

Twelve: OKAY. Fine. I'll pick then. Ten--you're somewhat friendly, you're in charge of smiling and looking nice--

{Eleven has logged on} 

Eleven: I'm coming! I'm already almost to Baker Street. And besides, who put you in charge?

Twelve: I'm the oldest. And we don't need someone to babysit. 

Eleven: I might come in handy! You know, if any of you need help being pushed in your wheelchairs. Ten! Give me some support! 

Ten: Sorry, but I'll have to agree with Twelve--

Eleven: !! :-(  

Four: Where's the Master? 

Twelve: What? 

Four: He hasn't said anything, and that's unusual. 

TheMaster: What a brilliant observation.

TheMaster: Having tea with the 'Time Lord' while you all display your exemplary intelligence. Care to join us? 

{SH has logged on} 

{SH has changed his username to SherlockHolmes} 

SherlockHolmes: I've found you at last, Doctors. It wasn't that difficult. I've been tracking your movements for three weeks, in which you've appeared in almost every time period imaginable, which complicated things slightly, but it was no trouble in the end. It appears I've managed to get your attention.

Ten: Sherlock Holmes--is that some kind of code name?

Four: He's just a fiction. 

SherlockHolmes: This fiction is in fact the only existing consulting detective, and a high functioning sociopath on the side. 

Twelve: You're not a Time Lord.

SherlockHolmes: Has it taken you that long to puzzle it out? And I thought I'd finally found an equal. 

TheMaster: Tell me about it. 

{Moriarity has logged on} 

Moriarity: Tell me about it.

{Moriarity has logged off} 

TheDoctors: ... 

Twelve: But then how did you know Xenphian code? 

SherlockHolmes: Someone who is also unfortunately my brother happens to work for the British Government. Correction, he is, essentially, the British government. 

Eleven: And how did the British government know Xenphian code? 

TheMaster: You're forgetting that at the moment, I am (formally) in charge of the British government! The paperwork is dreadful but making fun of people makes up for it. But it seems someone's been reading my paperwork... 

Twelve: Enjoy being prime minister while it lasts! Ha. 

Ten: Sherlock Holmes--but what would a fictional detective want with us? 

SherlockHolmes: Subtract the fictional and you'll almost sound intelligent. 

Six: Well, what is it you want? 

SherlockHolmes: Information. Proof. You may be time-travelers, but I highly doubt you're from another planet. 

Ten: You want to be proven wrong? 

SherlockHolmes: If it comes to it, yes. Primarily, however, I want to solve a mystery. 

Twelve: What mystery would that be? 

SherlockHolmes: Myself.