"And oh baby, and oh baby, I'm trying. I can't erase your picture from my head." -Erase, Omar Apollo

Friday
October 26, 2018
Liam and Alex's apartment
10:58 P.M.

It's been a month since Liam had woken up in a hospital, and it had also been a month since Liam decided he would try to restore the life he once made for himself. Slowly, but surely he became more accepting to the life he couldn't remember with the help of Alex, Mia, and Harry, but that didn't stop him from missing the person he last remembered. That surely didn't stop him from trying to get answers on where they went wrong.

In the past month Alex had been more than understanding and patient with Liam allowing their relationship to restore again at whatever pace Liam allowed it to. Sure, he became frustrated at times, but he had to remind himself that Liam was being much more accepting and open to the situation than many who went through similar experiences, at least according to the doctors that did examinations on him every other week.

Still, while he knew Liam was trying his hardest to go along with everything, he was still reluctant in a variety of ways.

Two weeks after his release from the hospital Liam decided that he wanted Alex to show him how they fell in love; what places they went on dates, where they first met, etc. Alex was ecstatic about Liam's request, so much so that he took multiple days off just so he could spend the day showing Liam how, when, and where they had fell in love.

When Mia heard about Liam's request she was happy for both of them and seemed to put on a genuine smile for Liam finally. Meanwhile, Harry was convinced that they may be moving a little too fast and that Liam wouldn't be able to handle all that information. Nonetheless, Harry ended up being on board with the whole idea after a little convincing from everyone.

Alex first started small, showing Liam the public library they met at, which Liam couldn't help, but think was completely different from where he met Zayn, and explaining the day they first saw each other. From what Liam gathered he met the boy in July right before he turned twenty-six. Alex said Liam was coming to the library to print off papers like himself and when he saw Liam he was too scared to say anything, but Mia was cheering him on telling him to just go for it.

Luckily, Liam had beat him to the punch and asked him for his number when he was going up to the printer to get his papers. Alex explains that Liam always use to tease him saying that Alex was staring at him the whole time he was there.

The next day Alex showed Liam where their first date was, an aquarium and then a small cafe. According to the story Alex told Liam it was a very fun date for the both of them and Alex claims he fell for him at that moment.

The next couple days would be filled of amusement parks, pictures from carnivals and basketball games, and bike rides in downtown.

Liam had to admit that all this moved him and the way Alex spoke about the memories and him in such adoration made him understand how he could have fallen for the small male. Alex was very attractive in Liam's eyes, funny, had a bubbly personality, had a slight Spanish accent which he thought was cute, and all in all he seemed to be a good person.

However, with all this both Liam and Alex was aware of Liam's constant reluctance to the blossoming of their relationship.

Alex was aware that Liam's last memory was his ex and while it was upsetting, it explained why he would move away when their touches became to intimate. It explained why he tensed up whenever Alex mentioned them being in love, and it explained why Liam wouldn't allow himself to fall back into their relationship so easily.

Liam would try to cooperate and honestly, it was frustrating that the only person he could think of was Zayn, but he was realizing he needed closure. There was no way he would be able to love Alex fully if he couldn't remember himself falling out of love with Zayn.

He needed to know what happened between him and Zayn, but his mother and father didn't seem to know anything, Alex said that it wasn't his place to speak on the situation because he still didn't know the whole story, Mia was about to tell Liam, but was quickly shut up by Harry, and Harry was completely unwilling to tell.

Liam almost felt it quite ridiculous that Harry couldn't tell him about his own life, but Harry only told him that it was a lot to tell and he would hopefully figure it out in due time.

"Ba- Liam, what's wrong?" Alex asked lightly staring through his long curly eyelashes at Liam, who had zoned out during his mini spill about photography.

"No, I'm just admiring you. You're really pretty, you know?" Liam said aiming to make the boy blush and succeeding in doing so. Of course he couldn't share that his mind was wondering elsewhere (Zayn) while Alex was talking so he complimented him instead. However, he wasn't lying. Alex was undeniably beautiful.

"I'm glad you think so." He replied with a huge smile and a blush covering his cheeks. It was honestly a sight to see and Liam was happy to bask in it. He just wished his past would stop nagging at him, but in reality the accident was still fresh and he had not gained any memories back.

"Today was fun by the way, I know I've already said this about a hundred times, but I truly do appreciate you recreating all this for me and just being so patient and kind. You are amazing." And Liam meant every bit of what he was saying.

A blush deepened over Alex's cheeks again, "You have to stop because I'm finding it hard not to kiss you right now."

Liam didn't know if what he said next was a good idea, but he had to try it. Despite, how cliche it sounded maybe them kissing would trigger some memories. Maybe if he just touched his lips to his forgotten lover then everything would come back to him.

So, Liam said, "You can kiss me if you want to."

He watched the boy's gray eyes fill with love.

"Are you sure? I mean- I mean I don't want to make you uncomfortable or overstep boundaries b-because I know-" He stumbled only to be shut up by Liam who moved in to push their lips together.

Alex relaxed into the kiss almost instantly pushing his soft, plush lips into Liam's and placing his hands on the sides of Liam's face. Liam easily wrapped his arm around Alex's tiny waist deepening the kiss a bit more.

Liam wanted to feel something and he did. The kiss felt good, better than good even, but Liam pulled away a bit unsatisfied. The kiss didn't trigger his memories and it surely didn't make him forget about Zayn, if anything it had him comparing Alex to his ex.

Liam tried to hide his disappointment by pulling to smaller boy closer, placing his body basically on top of his. Alex's head rested on Liam's chest and he felt completely ecstatic about it because it finally felt as if he was getting his boyfriend back.

"H-How do you feel? You know, about the kiss and all?" Alex uttered with apprehension.

"It was good, really good." Liam replied simply before rubbing the boy's back and kissing his forehead.

Liam now knew that he wanted to love this boy, but there was no way he could do that without addressing his past with Zayn.

He decided he wanted to see Zayn, not only for closure for himself or to win Zayn back, but for him to be able to love Alex fully.

Or at least that's what he tried to convince himself.

First, he just needed to convince Harry to give him Zayn's address.

October 27, 2018
Harry's Apartment
8:11 A.M.

Liam knocked repeatedly on Harry's red front door loudly, praying the neighbors wouldn't hear. It's not like he care if they heard because this was urgent, but he assumed Harry would care.

After a minute the door swings open, halting Liam's movement. Harry appeared in the doorway looking completely sleep deprived and agitated.

"Good morning, sunshine." Liam said cheerfully, giving Harry a small wave. Harry's demeanor remained unchanging as he looked behind Liam.

"How the fuck did you even get here? I don't see Alex with you." Harry inquired squinting his eyes. Liam figured Harry would ask this question.

"Well, I guess you all forgot to mention that I had two cars, one of which wasn't in the wreck, so I took it upon myself to find out which car it was and I drove over here this morning." Liam explained. Because he had no recollection of the accident he wasn't triggered by driving and he had gotten his cast, for his wrist, off last week.

Harry just stared at him for a second before stepping out of his apartment and closing the door slightly behind him.

"First of all, Alex is going to be worried sick when he wakes up-"

"Oh don't worry, I left him a note and a text so he won't be too worried."

Harry merely dragged his hand down his exhausted face before continuing. "And number two, Louis is here-"

"Woah, wait what? Did you guys fuck last night?" Liam asked growing excited for his best friend.

"Would you shut the hell up? No we did not fuck last night-" Harry whisper-yelled before Liam cut him off again with a small mutter.

"I can tell, someone's a bit cranky."

Harry stared at Liam for a second before continuing what he was saying previously, "He just crashed here because he was drunk and I didn't want him driving home."

"Some things never change." Liam said with a faint chuckle of amusement, although he felt a bit sorry for his friend. Liam was aware that Harry wasn't a huge party go-er, in fact he didn't even drink, but Liam knew that Harry had been to far more parties than he had and the majority of them were to go and be a knight in shining armor to Louis. In return he got no benefits except for the eternal promise of being friend zoned.

Liam had told Harry countless time to maybe take a step back so that Louis will appreciate him more, but Harry continues to foolishly come to Louis' rescue, even at the most inconvenient hours because according to him, "they're really good friends".

"Shut it, bitch. Why are you even here?" Harry says sharply. Liam could tell Harry was getting a little defensive about Louis, like he always does.

"Well, can we go inside?" Liam questioned.

"Um, yeah, Louis should be out for a couple more hours and he's a deep sleeper." Harry muttered opening the door to the apartment for them to come inside.

The apartment was spacious, but not nearly as nice as Liam's, which was understandable given Harry lived by himself. Harry was also a very frugal person, so despite him making really good money from being an engineer, he lived a little below his means.

Liam sat at island in the kitchen while Harry began to make himself some breakfast.

"Okay, what's going on?" Harry inquired while cracking his egg now that they were settled.

Liam thought about what he should say to make everything make since before he opened his mouth.

"Okay, so since I've left the hospital, I've really gotten to know Alex and he's an amazing guy." Liam began.

"Aw." Harry gushed. "Well, that's good. Alex truly is a sweetheart."

"Yeah, I know and although, I haven't gotten any of my memory back I believe him when he says me and him loved each other. I mean he's beautiful, smart, funny, a bit shy, but like in an adorable, you know?" Harry shook his head as if he agreed with everything Liam just stated.

Liam took a breath, "The only problem is that I can't move on with him, if all I think about is Zayn."

Harry stopped cutting his vegetables and stared a Liam sympathetically.

"I wish I could give you closure, Liam, but that's not my story to tell and I would hate to sound biased or give you the wrong story, you know-" Liam interrupted his rambling friend already knowing where Harry was going with this.

"Yeah, I know. And that's why I have a solution."

"Okay and what is that?" Harry said mixing his eggs in the bowl.

"I'd like to see Zayn myself and ask him really what happened between us-"

"Liam." Harry interjected, but Liam continued determined to make Harry understand where he was coming from me why this was a good idea.

"Harry, just hear me out. I really think I could love Alex like I'm sure I did before, but I can't do that if the last memory I have is Zayn carrying my baby and us in love. I have no idea why we even broke up, so how can I move on? I know you think me doing this may be triggering or that I'm only doing this to rekindle my love with Zayn, but I can assure you this is only for closure so I can love Alex the right way."

Harry was silent for a little bit as if he was thinking and Liam was just waiting for his best friend to say something.

"Liam, you and Zayn's past was messy."

"So I've heard, but I can't avoid it for the rest of my life if I want to move on." Liam stated and deep down Harry knew what Liam was saying was true.

"Okay, say for instance I go along with this. What's next?" Harry asked.

"Well, you give me his address and I show up-"

"Wait you're planning on ambushing him?" Harry asked about outraged by the idea. Harry wasn't Zayn's biggest fan, but he didn't know if he deserved to be ambushed by his ex who he had successfully avoided for nearly four years.

"Well yes, do you have any better ideas?" Liam asked receiving a dumb look from Harry.

"Oh, I don't know? Maybe contact him and ask him to meet with you so you guys can talk, like a normal human being would."

Liam had already pondered the thought and he knew that wouldn't work for him.

"See, I thought about that, but that gives him room to deny my request. If I show up at his door there's a bigger chance he will cooperate."

"Or the call the cops." Harry said as he put his omelet of the skillet.

"Look, are you with me or not?"

Harry thought for a second, but he decided he would do this for Liam. It hopefully wouldn't turn out too bad.

"Fine, I'll do it." Harry muttered a bit unsure of his decision to assist his friend on trespassing and possibly getting the cops called on him.

"Also, don't tell Louis or anyone about this please. Especially Louis, that boy can't keep his mouth closed for shit." Liam said and Harry chuckled fondly knowing it was true.

"My lips are sealed, pal."

A/N: How are you all feeling about this?

08/06