38. What Could Be

{Naya}

My throat felt a lot less sore when I finally came around. In fact, my whole body seemed back to its normal state.

After relieving myself in the adjoining bathroom and using a little magic to take care of any other hygienic needs, my next instinct was to find Uri.

I made sure to wear the shortest cropped blouse and some black jeggings that hugged me in all the right places. To complete the look, I conjured up a green flannel and red Toms.

Thanks to the occasional passing maid, I was able to locate the courtyard. I expected to find Uri chilling by the pool, but the only one there to greet me was Mr. Naim.

The magus gave me a fatherly hug and asked if I was hungry. When I declined and told him that I was looking for Uri, he replied, "He won't be around for some time I'm afraid. He ran off to take care of some errands for me. But I'll tell you what. Why don't you help me out for a few hours at the emporium? Then we can go and grab lunch."

Zayn really didn't give me a chance to make a decision before hauling me off to the front yard of his estate, where a driver was already waiting for us.

During the drive into downtown Knoxville, Zayn occupied the silence with the agenda for the next few weeks. While he would work on locating the collector that had attacked us, I would receive training from both him and Ritsu. Zayn and I both agreed that I needed to have more control over my fire in case we ran into trouble again. He also told me that he extended my contract so that I could spend more time in the djinni form without getting stuck in it for eternity.

I made it known that I was excited to get back to working with Uri on his human lessons. Zayn didn't seem to hear me and kept going on about how relieved he was that I was safe from the collector.

When we reached his shop, I was delighted to find Sinbad working the register. In between assisting customers and filing things away, Sinbad relayed everything that had happened since we were last together. Apparently, he had no interest in returning to his own reality. He was quite content working for Zayn in what he still referred to as the "ocean of dreams." Something told me that Sinbad was hoping for another encounter with Portia.

By the time Zayn, Sinbad, and I returned to the estate, it was already dusk. Although I had fun helping them out at the shop, there was nothing more that I wanted than to see Uri. I got a hold of the directions to his room from Sinbad and began to climb the spiral staircase when a perverted little monkey attempted to intercept me.

"Ritsu, if you know what's good for you, then move the hell out of my way."

The monkey ignored me and used my arm as a rope ladder to get onto my shoulder. Once perched there, he said, "Is that any way to talk to the demon who saved your life?"

"Yes, if that demon only does so in order to grope me. Now get lost. I need to talk to Uri."

Ritsu didn't move from my shoulder. "Mistress, I would strongly advise against that. Uriel isn't exactly in the guest-receiving mood."

I rolled my eyes. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Ritsu wrung his hands in silence.

I slowed my pace. "Did something happen to him while I was passed out? You better tell me!"

"Uh . . ."

I shook the monkey off me and made a dash for Uri's rooms. Ritsu's shouts faded into the background as I barged through the doors. My eyes scanned over furniture and bookshelves until I spotted him.

Uri was leaning back on a leather divan with his feet up and a tablet propped on his lap. He was – no surprise – playing a game.

I wanted to call his name, but whatever anticipation I felt before evaporated. An alien sensation took its place – one that I could not comprehend or explain.

What I felt in that moment was equivalent to what a person might feel if they walked in on someone undressing or strangers making love.

For no visible reason, I felt deeply ashamed and uncomfortable from merely standing in Uri's presence. I wasn't supposed to be there. In fact, I needed to leave.

"I'm sorry," I gasped as I shuffled backwards out of the room.

Once I was on the other side of the doors, those bizarre feelings left as quickly as they had arrived. I stood there in bewilderment, staring at Ritsu, who had his little arms crossed.

"What the hell was that?"

"I told you," he whispered.

I held my gaze with the double doors and placed a hand on it.

Shame. Discomfort. Embarrassment.

I took my hand away from the door and felt normal again.

"He's avoiding you." Ritsu's words may have been blunt, but I sensed an apology in his tone.

It made sense. Uri hadn't come to see me at all that day. Had he really been running errands for Zayn or had he been here this whole time?

"He's avoiding me? But why, Ritsu? What did I do?"

Ritsu rolled his eyes. "You didn't do a thing, Mistress. Uriel thinks it's his fault that the collector showed up. I suppose he assumes that by staying away from you, he is somehow protecting you from future harm."

"Then he's an idiot if that's the case," I hissed at the door, loud enough for Uri to hear. I wanted to say more, but my throat clenched and I felt repelled by the very sight of the door.

"Coward," I spat once I had put enough distance between me and his room. I left Ritsu in the hallway, fighting angry tears all the way to my room.

Why won't he just talk to me? Haven't we been through enough for him to see that I would never blame him for something like this?

By now, I was curled up in a lawn chair on the terrace connected to my rooms. The nighttime air was crisp and I had a romantic view of the courtyard and gardens.

"You could be here with me, Uri," I whispered, drawing my knees into my chest. We could be smoking hookah and laughing. We could be pigging out on hors d'oeuvres from the kitchens and making plans for the future. Our future.

We could be holding each other right now.

The frustration at the reality of never kissing him again brought on another vicious wave of tears.

So I cried and drowned out the magical lights below.