Chapter 18: Our Play

"I don't want to do this," Axel whined loudly. Sitting across from me on my bed, the brown haired boy dragged his hands down his face.

"Come on, Axel, you got this," I responded. "It's only a few more questions, and then you're done."

"Can we take a break?" he mumbled.

"Not until you're finished with that paper," I told him.

"Alexis..." he groaned.

"Axel," I mocked him.

He sighed, moving slightly so that his knee brushed against mine. I moved away, gaining his attention. "What?" he asked curiously.

"What?" I responded.

"I touched your knee and you moved away like I stabbed you," he responded.

I shrugged and looked down at my homework. "Maybe I just wanted to move back."

As we continued working, Axel's knee brushed up against mine. I shifted back a bit, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. His hand lightly touched my calf as he flipped the page of his notebook. I backed away a bit as warmth shot up my body with every accidental brush. With every touch from him, I was moving further and further back. His knee touched against mine and I went to move away, feeling a dropping sensation in the pit of my stomach as I nearly fell back. Axel reached out and grabbed my wrists, pulling me forward.

When I finally realized what had happened, I was only inches from Axel's face. His hands were clutching my wrists as his large eyes, which were protected by the familiar black frames, stared deep into mine as if reading them like books. I averted his gaze, trying to look anywhere but into his eyes. I glanced at his mouth, thinking about how nice they felt against mine when we kissed. "You just wanted to move back?" he asked quietly.

Before I could do anything that could potentially ruin our friendship, I moved away from him, as well as the edge of the bed. I pulled my hands from his grip and twisted around so my back was against the wall. I attempted to speak multiple times as he stared at me, opening and closing my mouth like a fish. When I finally managed to form a coherent sentence, there wasn't much depth to it. "Just do your homework, Axel."

I probably should've taken my own advice but I just stared at the paper in front of me, rereading the first sentence over and over again. I couldn't stop myself from thinking about the boy only two feet away from me. Why is he sending me mixed signals? I don't know much about romantics but I can tell that what he's been doing can be considered a form of flirting, perhaps unintentional. I'll have to discuss it with one of my sources, and by one of my sources, I mean Holden or Cam. And maybe Isaac. He's good at flirting, plus I need to talk to him about Sidney.

"Alexis," Axel started as he stared at me. I slowly zoned back into reality. "Can you help me with this question?"

"Sure," I answered, reaching out and grabbing the paper from on top of his binder. "Which question?"

"Eight," he replied and I looked at it. I solved it along the side of his paper, trying my best to show my work so he wouldn't have any more questions.

"Here." I handed the paper back to him before struggling to focus my attention on my own work.

"Wait...how'd you get that?" he asked me and I looked at him, watching as he fixed his glasses. When I noticed that he wasn't going to hand me the paper or move so I could see, I shifted towards him a bit, trying my best to avoid physical contact.

"Which part?" I asked and I could fell his breath hitting the back of my neck. He moved closer to see the paper, reaching his hand out to point at the paper. His hand brushed mine and I inched it away a bit, covering up my movement by reaching for his pencil.

"I don't get how you got the answer. What did you do?" he asked me as he stared at his Pre-Calculus homework. I made a move to write and he moved closer to me in order to see it. I was on the verge of telling him to get a new prescription if he was having such a hard time seeing that he had to move five inches away from the paper. As much as I wanted to say it, I knew the words wouldn't leave my mouth in the form of an intelligible sentence. "Can you just do the problem again and say what you're doing?"

"Okay, so f-first..." I trailed, stuttering and stumbling over my words as his breath hit my neck and his leg pressed against mine. If I even turned my head in the slightest, I'd be only inches away from his face. An explanation that would've taken me a few second had I been a good two feet away from him took me a whopping five minutes. "Get it?"

"Yeah," he answered. "Thanks, Alexis."

"No problem," I muttered as I moved back to my original spot with my back pressed against the wall. I wondered if he'd noticed my goosebumps.

+++

"You two want to help me make dinner?" my dad asked, poking his head into the living room. Axel was lying on the couch while I was crunched up in the corner with my knees to my chest so he wouldn't place his legs on my lap.

"Yeah," I answered immediately, getting up from my spot and hopping towards the kitchen. Axel followed behind me and I glanced back to see him stretching, revealing his stomach. I immediately turned back around, following my dad to the kitchen.

"Grab the butter from the fridge, Lex?" my dad asked and I nodded, walking towards the fridge. As I opened it and ducked down to grab the butter, I felt a presence behind me.

"Would you mind grabbing me a Dr. Pepper?" Axel inquired, considerably close. I quickly grabbed a soda and turned around to hand it to him, surprised at how close he was. I whipped around with the butter in one hand and the soda in the other. He grabbed my arm lightly, pulling me forward so that I was practically pressing against him. My breathe was caught in my throat as I made eye contact with him, looking at the smirk lining his lips.With his other hand, he shut the fridge door. "Thank you."

I pushed away from him and approached the counter. My father was digging in the cabinets thankfully or else he would've witnessed whatever that was. I placed the item onto the counter, watching as my dad put it to use. I felt Axel's gaze on me and I wanted my father to ask me to do something so I could avoid looking at him. "Can you grab me the salt from the top cabinet, Axel?" my dad asked.

"I got it," I blurted. Great, it gives me something to do. I looked at the cabinet and climbed onto the counter. As I slowly stood up, I imagined my mother's reaction. What are you doing standing on the counter? Get down before you break your neck. I reached into the cabinet and grabbed the salt. I looked at the tiles before wondering how I was going to get down safely. Usually when I get on the counter, I have a chair to step on while getting off, but I was in such a rush to get the salt before Axel that I disregarded the chair completely. I'd sit down on the counter but the microwaves right by my feet and I barely had room to stand up, never mind lower myself into a sitting position without falling and embarrassing myself.

"Need help?" Axel asked as he walked over towards the counter.

"Yeah, can you grab me a chair?" I responded, hoping that he'd do as I asked and grab a chair. Last thing I need is to be pressed up against him in anyway.

"No need, I got you," he told me.

"I can do it, I just need a chair," I explained.

"I got you, Alexis," he responded, staring into my eyes. I looked away and muttered a swear word under my breath. I hesitated but decided not to put up too much of a fight or else I'd come off as suspicious. Grabbing my hips, he placed me down onto the floor, patting my head once my feet touched the tile. My face was bright red and I was sure my father noticed it as I placed the salt onto the counter beside him. I left tasks that required heights for Axel while I took on the smaller tasks, like going in the bottom cabinets and getting pans, or mixing the contents of the bowl while my dad ran out of the room for a moment.

"Do we have sauce in there?" my dad asked curiously. After checking the fridge and the cabinets, as well as the pantry, I shook my head and he sucked his teeth. "I'm going to have to run to the store to get some. Everything's ready to be cooked. Turn on the stove and the oven at around 6:45. I'll be home by 7 and then I'll heat up the sauce and we'll eat."

"Okay," Axel and I said in unison. My dad nodded before heading towards the door, grabbing his car keys from the table. I leaned against the counter beside the stove, waiting for the clock to reach 6:45. Five minutes. My eyes fell on Axel as he tapped away on his phone.

Things aren't the way they used to be, I concluded. When we became friends again, I thought that we'd have the same friendship. We'd be able to talk on the phone until 2 in the morning; we'd laugh and joke and play videogames together; we'd dance and hug and help each other with relationships. Not to say we still can't do those things, but I feel as if I'm constantly reminding myself that this is Axel and we're just friends. It's hard to believe that though when he's lying with his head on my chest as we fall asleep and when we're kissing in the back of the truck.

Why do feelings have to make everything so complicated? And why does he have to be so complicated? Maybe if Victoria hadn't come into the picture, we would've been something more. Or maybe he just doesn't think of me like that. But what if he does? He kissed me. But he said he wasn't thinking. I felt my stomach clench when I thought of our kiss. I was a bundle of nerves then and I'm a bundle of nerves now. I wish I could read his mind just to see what he's thinking, just to get a glimpse into his brain. Maybe then I'd grasp at whatever it is he feels for me, whether it's simply platonic or perhaps romantic. Then I'd know whether to back off or advance forward. Then I'd know whether it's worth risking the friendship or not.

It took me a moment to realize that Axel was now staring at me with a look of pure curiosity on his face. He's probably wondering what I'm thinking about, or maybe he knows that I'm thinking about him. He got up from the chair he was settled in and began advancing towards me. I expected him to stop a few feet away and initiate conversation but he didn't. He continued walking and I felt my breath catch in my throat as he trapped me between his chest and the counter. He stared at me for a few seconds, examining my face. I gazed up at him, blinking slowly as I tried to grasp what was happening. The fridge scene all over again, but this time I'm prepared...a bit more. I just stared up at him as his eyes scanned my face repeatedly, watching as his tongue traced his lower lip. Is he going to kiss me?

I hesitated before bringing my hand up and running my fingers through his hair. When my hand reached the base of his neck, I left it there. He noticed this and bit down on his lip before leaning in a bit closer. Just a few more centimeters. Come on, you got this.

"What's for din—?" Dylan started as he entered the kitchen, stopping short when he saw us. Axel glanced over his shoulder at Dylan before using his hands, which were gripping the counter on either side of me, to push himself back. My hand slid from it's place on his neck down to my side in a limp, sloppy motion. In the meanwhile, Axel preoccupied himself with starting up the food while I was left to stand there, staring at my older brother.

"Okay, do I have the right to ask what that was?" my brother queried.

"We were practicing for a play," Axel fibbed with a smirk on his lips as he stared at my brother.

"Yeah? What play was that? Up Close and Personal? Is it a musical?" Dylan asked, tilting his head slightly. He looked from Axel to me and back. Axel laughed as he returned to the chair he was in moments ago.

"Spaghetti and meatballs, to answer your first question," Axel blurted.

"Oh...alright," my brother nodded before slowly heading back towards the stairs. I looked at Axel to find that he was tapping away on his cell phone yet again as if nothing happened.

+++

"Isaac!" I called for the twin as I spotted him in the emptying hallways. We had Spanish class next and I wasn't sure if he was even planning on going. He was walking in the complete opposite direction.

"Alexis!" he responded just as loudly as he turned around.

"Am I interrupting something?" I asked him as I adjusted my bag on my shoulder.

"No, I was just going to get my Spanish textbook," he explained. "But what's up?"

"Well I have a few things to talk to you about," I started. This probably isn't the best time. The late bell is about to ring and the walk from this hallway to Spanish is roughly three minutes. "But I'll explain as we go to your locker."

"Alright," Isaac started just as the late bell rang.

"Okay, first, I want to ask you about..." I trailed, unsure of how to continue. I decided to just go for it. "Isaac, how do you flirt?"

"What do you mean? Me personally? Or in general?" he asked. Noticing my uncertain stare, he furrowed his eyebrows. "Or Axel?"

I felt my face warm up a bit and I shook my head. "Just—I..." I put my face in my hands. Deciding to just get the awkward part out of the way, I nodded. Here goes my dignity. "Yeah, Axel."

His response wasn't what I anticipated. I expected him to smirk and laugh and make fun of my curiosity but instead he pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes. "Well...I've never really seen Axel flirt. I just know that he's very...how do I say it without it sounding creepy? Touchy? Yeah, that just sounds perverted. He flirts with his hands, I guess. That doesn't sound much better, come to think of it." He fiddled with his locker, grabbing his Spanish textbook from its confines before closing the metal compartment. We began heading in the direction of our shared class.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked, growing slightly alarmed. Is my best friend a secret creep? That makes two of us.

"He just does a lot of touching, like playful shoves and touching your hands, brushing up against you—stuff like that, I guess. I never really pay attention, though. I only ever notice because he and Holden are the most polite flirters of the group. Everyone else is just crude and bold," he chuckled. "But I can pay attention more and get back to you, if you'd like."

"Yeah, that sounds good," I told him with a nod.

"Personally, I think he flirts with you," he stated.

I quickly ignored him, swearing internally as my face reddened. "And one last thing," I blurted, watching as he placed his textbook into his bag.

"Yeah?" he asked me.

"Sidney," I started.

"What about her?" he asked with a small smirk on his lips.

"What are your intentions with her?" I furthered, trying to give him the benefit of the doubt before I go in for the kill.

"She's cute and just, I don't know, different. She's not like most of the girls I find myself with. Her innocence is kind of refreshing, but not in a weird, childish way," he shrugged. "She's quirky."

"You noticed this all in the span of a few hours?" I asked him. Either he's more observant than I've given him credit for or he's a creep. I genuinely expected him to say something like, 'she's hot and I'm just trying to get with her.' Maybe I don't think highly enough of him. He's been proving me wrong a lot lately.

"No, I mean, I have a few classes with her and she kind of stands out. She's the only girl I know who wears a bright yellow dress on the darkest and dingiest day of the year. She always manages to stand out," he attempted to inform me. "I don't know how to explain it. She's just different and it's nice."

"She's intimidated by you," I told him, cutting straight to the chase.

"By me? Why?" he asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

"Your reputation, Isaac," I informed him. He gave me a blank look and I sighed. "You're not the most serious guy. And I don't mean your humor. You kind of have a past of hopping from girl to girl- no offense."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything," he shrugged. "I just haven't met a girl that has convinced me to stick around."

"Look, all I'm saying is that Sidney doesn't know much about relationships; she knows less than me. She's already nervous enough about your date on Saturday. Just don't overwhelm her and don't expect her to do anything, if you know what I mean," I responded.

"Jeez, Lex, tell me how you feel, will you?" he muttered.

"I'm just saying, Isaac. The girl hasn't even had her first kiss yet—," I was quickly cut off by a surprised 'what?' "Yeah, she's nervous enough about that as it is. Just...go slow and don't pressure her into doing anything."

"So no kiss on the first date?" he asked me with a sly smirk.

I shot him a glare and sighed, rolling my eyes. "You're good at flirting and reading body language, right? If she's into it and seems comfortable, then go for it. But if she doesn't, then don't because you'll scare her off. The key to getting to know Sidney is to wait and be patient."

"Okay, okay, I got it Mama Lex," Isaac informed me. "Don't you have to threaten me not to hurt her now or you'll chop off my man parts?"

"I don't feel the need to threaten you," I told him. "Because I trust that you won't hurt her."

"Really? It sure didn't sound like it a few minutes ago when you were insulting my previous relationships, or lack thereof," he muttered.

"I trust you enough to treat her right. But if she tells me anything, that you tried to force yourself onto her or you hurt her feelings—," I started but he cut me off, grinning.

"Here comes the threat," he insisted with a grin.

"You know what...I'm not going to say anything. I'll let you imagine what I'll do to you," I nodded as I narrowed my eyes at him.

"There it goes- there's the threat," he nodded.

+++

"You will be making a presentation about a Spanish speaking country," Mr. Gonzales explained. "I'll be passing out a packet with the requirements and the rubric. Take the time to look it over and if you have any questions, be sure to ask them because this is the only class time we have to do it. After this, the project is your responsibility to finish. The only other day where we'll be doing something with them is on the day of presentations."

As he passed out the papers, I scanned it. "We can work with a partner?" I asked, more to myself.

"Yes, you can but realize that if you work with a partner and they don't do any work, it's up to you to do something about it," he replied.

"Do you want to work together?" Sam asked, catching me off guard. He'd been so quiet these past few days that I forgot he even sat beside me. When I looked at him, he immediately shook his head. "Never mind, you probably want to work alone."

"No, no, no," I replied. "Let's work together. It'll be fun. Which country do you want to do?" When I saw the lost look on his face, I opened his packet to the list of potential countries.

Assessing the list, he opened and closed his mouth. "Guatemala sounds good," he answered and I nodded.

"Okay, Guatemala it is," I responded.

I expected the teacher to let us start researching today but he answered a few questions before moving on to the new lesson. When he told us to take out our textbooks, I realized that Sam and I would have to work on this outside of school. I glanced at the due date – November 6th, a week from today. I'll have to ask him about when he's free.

As the class came to a close, I packed up slowly, fully intending to walk with Sam out to the parking lot. "So we have to work on this outside of class," I told him as I slipped the packet into my bag.

"Yeah, when are we going to?" he asked.

"I don't really have much going on this weekend," I told him. Well, aside from my traditional scary movie marathon with Axel for Halloween.

"Tomorrow's good for me," he responded, "unless you're busy."

He can come over early and leave before any of the guys arrive. Besides, if we don't finish, we always have time to do it after school next week whenever he's not working. "Yeah, I'm free, too."

"Your house or mine?" he asked me and I could tell he wanted me to say his house so he could avoid seeing the guys. I wanted to say his house too for that same reason but I knew that it wouldn't fly with my parents. My father knows that Sam likes me because of stupid Dylan, so he definitely won't let me go over his house alone.

"You can come over my house," I responded and he nodded, looking at the floor as we walked down the hallway. I shoved open the door for him.

"Are your brother's friends going to be there?" he asked curiously.

"No," I lied. Well, I don't know. "They won't start coming around until four." I'm sure I can convince Axel not to come over until four, or whenever I'm done working with Sam.

"What time should I come over?" he asked.

"What time is good for you?" I replied.

"Noon, but I'm available earlier, too," he answered.

Dylan doesn't wake up until half past noon so I should be able to slip him into the house before my older brother wakes up. And I think Dylan's going to pick up some food or something at around three so he should get out okay. What about his car? What if Dylan sees it? I'll just have him park it somewhere else. How am I going to get Sam to park his car down the street, though? With a sigh, I mentally swore. I'll figure something out.

"Yeah, noon's good," I told him as we reached the parking lot. Like usual, the guys were at the truck but they didn't stare too hard.

"I'll see you tomorrow then," he told me and I nodded, smiling at him. He offered me an awkward smile before walking past the truck.

"So you're back to walking with him now?" Holden asked me and I shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess," I responded. I just hope it's not that awkward for too long. That can get...awkward.

"Are you two working—?" Isaac started to ask but I shot him a look and he started to stutter. "—o-on fixing things?"

"Fixing what?" Colton asked.

"Their friendship, she did reject him, you know?" Isaac answered surprisingly fast.

"Yes," I answered Isaac's muddled question.

As the guys continued their conversation from before I arrived, Axel drifted over towards me. "Are we still on for tomorrow?" he asked and I could tell he was suspicious.

"Yeah," I answered.

"My house, right?" he replied. He noticed my lost look. "We alternate houses...remember?"

I completely forgot about that. "Oh, yeah, of course I remember! I'll bring the chips and the movie."

"Okay, good, when should I pick you up?" he asked. "Noon?"

"Actually, do you think you can pick me up around four?" I asked him.

"Four?" he inquired with raised eyebrows. "Why so late? We'll only be able to watch one movie before trick-or-treaters start coming around."

"I have a lot of homework that I have to get done and I don't want to have to stress about it while we hang out," I lied.

Narrowing his eyes at me, he nodded. "Okay, "I'll get you at around four."

"Okay," I told him, praying that he wouldn't pop in earlier. "Four."

"Four," he answered. I heard the truck starting up as people slowly walked to their cars.

I held up four fingers, wiggling them and he nodded. I mouthed the word 'four' while he slowly backed up. "Are you coming or not?" Dylan snapped from the car. I nodded as I got into the passenger's seat with a feeling that Axel was going to pop in earlier than four.