hey,,, can someone like,,, stab me,,

<6:46 pm, Thursday>

"So, Tyler, how is college treating you?" Josh's mother asked as she passed a bowl of mashed potatoes his way.

He took it and handed it to Josh's grandfather, trying his best to stay calm whilst being crammed between Josh's sisters.

"It's- it's- it's alright," he stuttered. "Could always be better, but I'm managing."

Josh's grandfather chuckled. "Too bad you're not old enough to drink yet. Your birthday's next month, correct? How're you going to celebrate?"

He nodded. Josh sighed from across the table, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Please stop interrogating him, for fucks sake," he hissed under his breath.

Ashley snorted and Abigail rolled her eyes. "Hey, don't fucking swear. It's thanksgiving."

Their father, Bill, cleared his throat, though he sounded like he was trying to hold in laughter.

"Abigail." She held up her hands in innocence.

"Laura, darling, can you pass me the corn?" Josh said mockingly, waving his hand. His mother frowned but did so.

It was obvious that the tension between Josh and his mother had yet to disappear. Josh's smile faltered, but he grabbed the bowl and fluttered his eyelashes dramatically. "You're a dear."

Laura had changed drastically from the last time he saw her. At Madison's funeral. She was thinner now, her hair graying at the roots. Her wrinkles stood out more prominently on her face, and her expression had hardened to a permanent frown.

Bill, on the other hand, turned softer rather than harder. He remained with the same straight and rigid posture, but his face was much more open and unprotected. He smiled and laughed easier.

The others changed too.

Ashley had cut her hair into a bob, and had a blue streak through it. She wore baggy clothes and tugged on the long sleeves of her sweatshirt constantly. That made Tyler really nervous.

Jordan seemed to have gone clean. He had a neat haircut, a job, and was more respectful towards his family. He even apologized to Josh and Tyler.

Abigail put her hand on Josh's arm. She leaned in and spoke in his ear. It must've been something he didn't like, because Josh's face dropped.

He coughed, excusing himself from the table. Ashley and Tyler exchanged curious glances.

"So, Tyler, how did you and Josh get back in touch?" Laura asked once Josh was out of earshot.

Tyler's insides turned into wet cement. He swallowed thickly and tried to smile. "We ran into each other at a coffee shop near my apartment. I'd been working with Abigail, but I didn't realize Josh was in the area as well."

Lies.

"Hmm," she said. "Well, I'm glad you did. You see, he hasn't been in the best mental state."

"Laura," Bill warned. She ignored him.

"He's been acting out and has cut himself off from everyone except for Abigail. He even got kicked out of Juilliard. I expect you to be a good influence on him, and get him back on his feet."

Ashley groaned loudly. "Please don't turn this into a lecture, mom. I just want one night without you telling us a life story for no reason."

Laura pursed her lips. "Ashley, I'm doing this for your brother, not me. He is completely off the rails, you must see it too. I just want to make sure he stops this rebellious act."

"Is he rebelling, or is he hurting?" Jordan added. "I know I haven't always been the best towards Josh, but I love him. I know when he's in pain and when he's acting out of spite. And that-" he points to the bathroom where Josh went to. "that is not spite."

Tyler wanted to intervene. He opened and closed his mouth several times, but no words came out.

"I just want to help him."

"Treating him like a criminal won't do the job, Laura."

"Apologize to your mother, Abigail."

"No, you know I'm right."

"He's in pain."

"He's scared."

"He might even be suicidal."

"I know my son, and I know that he is not suicidal."

"Right, because you sure noticed the first time."

Suddenly everyone was talking over each other with he exception of Josh's grandparents. Tyler's head began to spin and he couldn't think clearly. It was as if all of his senses had heightened tenfold. They spun together until they were all just a blur of color, sound, and emotion.

It was all just too much.

Tyler kept messing with his hair to relieve the sudden overwhelming sensation he was feeling, but it didn't help. He felt someone touch his shoulder, jumping at the feeling before realizing it was Josh.

He nodded to the glass window leading to the backyard and held out his hand.

"Follow me."

"Thanks for pulling me out of there," Tyler stuttered once they made it outside. "I don't know what happened or why I felt so overwhelmed. Everyone just started yelling and with the sense and lights, my mind just sort of stopped functioning."

Josh nodded, lighting a blunt he'd fished from his pocket. He stroke the lighter once, twice, before it finally lit the cigarette.

"I get it," he said after a moment. "Too much happening. Sensory overload. People with anxiety, autism, and synesthesia get it sometimes. That's one of the reasons I had to step out. I don't know why my mother insists on putting up those headache inducing lights. No one likes them, just no one wants to deal with her complaining."

Tyler chuckled nervously. "Yeah, that's never happened to me before. Has you ever-"

"Had sensory overload?" Josh finished. "Yeah. With the type of synesthesia I have, sound to color, it makes for a horrible time when there's so many different colored sounds that are way too loud and-" he shivered. "Concerts are okay. Football games I can handle. But for some reason I can't handle dinner parties."

"Same," Tyler said. "I get really tingly and tense, like the ceiling's about to cave in or something."

Josh offered a hit to Tyler, who refused.

"I- I can't do drugs," he said. "We have random drug tests at work, you know."

"Right," Josh retracted his hand.

They could now hear the yelling from outside. Tyler turned to see Laura stomping to the kitchen with a stack of plates- which still had food on them- and throwing them roughly into the sink. Bob followed, his demeanor angry and rough. Abigail stood and waved her arms around, clearly pissed off more than her father. Ashley was nowhere to be found, and their grandparents were trying to insert themselves between Abigail and Laura.

Josh winced at the crashing of dishes and turned to Tyler. "Want to get out of here?"

"Please."