Y/N's POV

They all eyed me suspiciously as I looked around and moved around Grimmauld Place. I knew that I would have to regain their trust and I knew that there was so much left unspoken between me and Hermione but for now, I wanted to enjoy reuniting with all my best friends again. Granted, so much had changed about me, it was still nice to feel like everything had returned to normal.

I wouldn't try and pretend that everything was good because otherwise, I would be lying to myself, everything was bad. Voldemort was on the brink of taking over the Wizarding world and I felt like the fate of it heavily rested on me and Harry's shoulders.

I brushed my fingertips against one of the shelves in the living room of Grimmauld Place before I asked Harry a question. "What does he want you to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"What does Dumbledore want you to do?" I asked Harry.

Harry looked at me suspciously. "Why should I tell you?"

I looked at the boy. "Do you trust me?"

"I don't know!" Harry exclaimed. "One minute you're our friend and the next you're our enemy! You say it's an act but it's getting harder and harder to tell whether you're on our side or not!"

"Do you think I want him to rule the world?" I said in a deadly whisper, moving towards Harry.

He looked at me, almost frightened. "I-I don't know."

"The love of my life is a Muggle-born for Merlin's sake Harry!" I exclaimed, ignoring the fact that I had called Hermione the love of my life. "Do you think I would stand and support someone who wants to see her dead?"

That seemed to be enough for Harry. No matter how much time I had spent with Voldemort or how evil I seemed to be, I would always choose Hermione.

"Fine," Harry huffed, "I'll tell you."

We all sat around the kitchen table and Harry began telling me his story, most of it I already knew but I wanted to hear Harry's perspective. Dumbledore had told me all his plans but there was still something that he never told me.

The prophecy that referred to me in the Department of Mysteries.

"Vol-"

"Don't say his name Harry." I warned him.

"He's split his soul into several pieces and they're in different objects, we have to get rid of all of them before we kill him." Harry told me. "I don't know where to start but I know that's what Dumbledore wants me to do."

I nodded as I listened. "I wish I could help you, I truly want to accompany you guys to help hunt his Horcruxes but I need to return to him. He will get suspicious."

"Why can't you desert him? Leave him and join us." Ron demanded.

I sighed. "It doesn't work that way. In order for him to divulge his secrets to me, I have to show him all the loyalty I can give him. No matter what the cost."

"Even if it means killing your own family?" Hermione muttered quietly from the corner.

My head snapped to turn and face her, the dark memories of what had happened to my father re-entering my mind. "Yes," I whispered almost inaudibly, "like I said. No matter the cost."

"But what do you get out of this? Surely everything you know, the Order already knows." Harry asked me.

I shook my head. "You didn't know his name was Taboo, and I told you so. I saved you from being hunted by Snatchers."

"Dumbledore said that Snape was his double agent, so why did he need to use you?" Harry questioned me again.

"I don't know, I've been trying to figure that out for myself," I replied, "maybe the Dark Lord trusts me more because I am his kin."

The three of them all looked at me, I was unsure of what to say to them. I wanted them to know that they could still trust me.

"Look," I told them, "I will keep an eye out for you guys. I'll tell you what I know and I'll make sure that they won't find you."

"Can you guarantee that?" Ron asked. "Protection for us and our families?"

"I can't even guarantee the full protection of you guys," I told them truthfully, "I can just give you my word that I will do all I can to try and keep everyone safe. Look at me, I'm just a teenage wizard, how much can I really do?"

"But you're a powerful wizard Y/N." Hermione said, reaching out to touch my arm. When I felt her touch I shuddered slightly and recoiled my arm, shrinking away from her touch.

As there was silence, a Patronus emerged from out of nowhere. It then solidified into the weasel that spoke with the voice of Ron's father.

"Family safe, do not reply, we are being watched."

And then the Patronus dissolved into nothingness.

"They're safe..." Ron breathed out.

I nodded, also internally thankful that they were safe. I made a mental reminder to check on Axel, Nick and Kieran as soon as I could, to make sure that they were safe. As well as that, I still needed to convince the Order that I was still on their side and even try make amends with my family.

"Dumbledore left you something in his will," Hermione said suddenly, "but the Minister kept it himself because he thought you were dead."

My eyes lit up with curiosity. "What did he leave me?"

"It was a Snitch, from the first match you played," Ron said, "it was taken back to the Ministry."

It would be no issue to get the Snitch, considering that Voldemort had infiltrated almost all of the Ministry.

"What did you guys get?" I asked.

"I got this thing called a Deluminator." Ron told me.

"I got a book." Hermione said.

"I got the sword of Gryffindor." Harry said.

I raised my eyebrows. "I doubt that's something Dumbledore is allowed to give."

"Exactly," Harry said, "that's why I don't have it."

It was getting late and Hermione proposed that we should all try to get some sleep. I had decided that it would be fine for me to stay the night, I could attempt my list of tasks that I needed to do tomorrow.

Currently on my mental checklist was:
Making sure that Axel, Nick and Kieran were ok
Talking to the Order
Potentially fixing things with my family
Going back to Malfoy Manor.
Whatever Voldemort wanted me to do next.

As everyone else settled into where they were going to sleep, I kept my distance. I was staring out of the window, lost in my thoughts, when someone approached me.

"Y/N?"

I turned and saw Hermione.

"Hello Hermione." I replied politely.

"How are you?" she asked me timidly.

I shrugged. "Alright I suppose, could be better."

"How is...uh...Madison."

"It's a bit weird talking about my current girlfriend with my ex." I said plainly. Inside my heart was breaking, I knew it was for the best but my heart so desperately wanted to be with her.

Hermione didn't reply and instead looked at the ground. "There's a sleeping bag for you if you want." she said after some silence.

"Thanks." I muttered.

The awkwardness between us was extremely obvious, it seemed like there was an invisible wall between us or a barrier that prevented us from telling each other how we truly felt.

"I'm going to go now." Hermione said, before walking away and leaving me at the window.

Outside, darkness had engulfed the street and all I could see was the pavement that was dimly lit up by streetlamps. Occasionally, the street lamps would flicker and the flicker would annoy me. It annoyed me to the point where I merely silenced it by destroying the bulbs within the streetlight with a mere whisper under my breath.

The street was now completely dark and black and I saw no point of looking out the window since I could no longer see anything anymore. I turned around and saw Harry, Ron and Hermione discussing their future plans and I felt like it wasn't appropriate to interfere.

Instead, I walked over to the sleeping bag Hermione had gotten out for me and slipped inside, although the interior of the sleeping bag was warm, I still felt cold inside. It was like there was this chilling feeling creeping up my bones.

Closing my eyes, I tried to ignore that feeling and drift off to sleep.

I woke up jerkily a couple hours later and noticed that everyone had fallen asleep, a clock told me that it was around two-thirty in the morning and I slipped out from the sleeping bag soundlessly.

To me, it felt like I had overstayed my welcome here so I crept towards the front door before muttering a Silencing Charm so that I wouldn't awake anyone. I turned the doorknob and walked out to the dark, empty streets. I turned back to the house and closed the door and silently wished goodbye to my friends.

And then I walked away, greeting the darkness like an old friend.