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Oh shit! Hisoka chuckles at me panicking as I make a mad dash to shore. What would they think if they saw me with him in such a compromising...position? It'd probably destroy Killua. He'd think Hisoka "ruined" me.

Eventually they catch sight of Hisoka through the fog, while I run behind a tree for cover. Gon calls his name and Hisoka turns like he has no idea they were there. I hear them all turn on their nen like they're about to battle.

"I see your nen's improved since we last saw each other. Happy to see the fruit's still ripening," Hisoka says.

Wow, I forgot how creepy he is. It actually makes me smile. Why am I like this? I think as I put my pants on. What's his fascination with Gon about? I peer over the tree trunk at him, naked as the day he was born, as if nothing's out of the ordinary. Is this confidence, or just a lack of social decorum? Maybe he likes taking people by surprise.

A muscle-bound man traveling with the boys and Bisky eventually yells at Hisoka. "Will you please put some damn clothes on?"

Dammit. His clothes are near me. How am I going to get away without being seen? I turn on my In and creep as quietly as possible 10 feet away. Hopefully I'll still hear what's going on. Oddly enough, I'm a little pissed that all this is happening. I really wanted to see more of Hisoka—I mean for things not to end, or umm, screw it, you know what I mean.

The boys of course look shocked and disgusted. Their eyes bulge at the sight of man meat. Meanwhile Bisky is all but drooling as Hisoka walks to shore and dresses. I would've never guessed she was attracted to him. That only makes me want to see what the fuss is about even more. Once Hisoka's dressed, Gon and Killua question him about why he's on the island.

"I came to see Chrollo," Hisoka lies.

My face wrinkles up at this. Why would he lie to them? Does their interest clash with his? Supposedly Hisoka wants to inform Chrollo that he can get an exorcist to remove a curse that restricts his nen. With everything going on, I'd almost forgotten that Hisoka came here to find the exorcist.

Oh goodness. Abengane! Was he able to escape the bomber's crew? How did I not think of him and the forest as soon as I woke up? I can't go and check on him now. Hisoka will wonder where I am and try to follow me. Besides, I'm not ready for him to leave yet...Wait a minute, if Hisoka's looking for the exorcist, does that mean the rest of the spiders are on the island looking for the exorcist too? I pray that isn't the case. I really don't want another target on my back.

"By the way, whose shoes are those?" Killua asks.

I look down at my bare feet, still wet and crumbly with dirt. How could I forget to cover my tracks and get my shoes??

I can almost hear Hisoka shrugging. "No idea."

"Are you being followed?" Gon asks.

Everything seems to slow down after I hear the question. I would die if they found me out here, half dressed with Hisoka. Especially after the mess I was to them before. The boys don't like him as it is. I don't need their judgment and questions. Honestly, Hisoka is my escape from the world, but the boys are a reality I'm in no mood to deal with. It's too embarrassing. Especially after I almost killed Killua by accident. I'm happy that he's doing okay, that makes me feel less guilty. But they're kids and I don't want to involve them in grown folks' business. I deserve my privacy.

"If you want, we'd be happy to patrol the area for any spies," Bisky says sweetly.

Ha, I could only imagine her sarcastic reply if she saw me. Guess you found the therapy you needed.

"That won't be necessary. I can handle myself," Hisoka responds.

"I could've sworn I've seen these shoes before." Killua sniffs the air. "And that scent is familiar too..."

This boy has the nose of a wolf. There's no way to mask my scent without drawing attention to myself. Dammit, Hisoka! Do something.

"Are you here with someone?" Killua asks as he takes a few steps in my direction.

"Well, if I were, that wouldn't be any of your business now would it?" Hisoka responds.

Suddenly Killua stops moving. I can feel him staring in my direction even though my body's hidden by a big oak tree. This is making me sweat more than the fog. Does he know it's me? Maybe that's why he stopped. Maybe he doesn't really want to know that I'm here with Hisoka. Poor little guy.

Thankfully Bisky clears her throat and changes the subject. "We're trying to recruit members for our team who are very strong," Bisky says in a dreamy voice. I look over at her and see her eyes have gone soft and sparkly while talking to Hisoka. Playing down her strength and sharp wit is such an odd look for her.

"Is there a reason you're recruiting strong people?" Hisoka asks.

The boys pull Bisky into a huddle, obviously displeased with her choice of candidate. After a few minutes of bickering, they officially invite Hisoka to come with them.

"An interesting offer to be sure. I have some loose ends to tie up, but how about we meet in Ai-Ai, the city of love, this evening?" Hisoka suggests.

They all agree on the arrangements and thankfully they go on their merry way. Before I see them again, I'll have to get another pair of shoes to wear. That and maybe some new perfume. This seems like an awful lot to protect the feelings of a 12-year-old boy, but somehow, as his first crush I feel like I owe it to him. I wait for the sound of their voices and footsteps to dissipate before I move. But as soon as I turn a corner, Hisoka's staring back at me, a small smile on his face. My whole body flinches. "You've got to stop doing that!" I say.

He shrugs. "Habit."

"So, loose ends huh?"

He strokes my collarbone, "I figured we weren't done with our little game."

I push his hand away. "We are. Seeing the boys just reminded me of all the work I still have to do."

"What a pity."

"Why'd you lie to them about why you're here?" I ask.

He starts to walk in the opposite direction the group just went. "I'm on a need-to-know basis with most of my acquaintances."

I roll my eyes. "That's reassuring."

He throws me some side eye. "Gon and Killua may have tried to prevent me from finding the nen exorcist if they knew my true intentions. Since when do you have a problem with lying to people?"

"I don't. Until it involves people I care about. If I can avoid lying, I try to," I say.

"Sounds like you don't have enough practice at it."

We walk quietly in the forest for a few minutes. The mating sounds of the cicadas picks up, balls of their shiny little bodies swimming around each other in the air. The fog starts to clear.

"By the way, have you heard anything concerning the nen exorcist's whereabouts?" Hisoka asks.

There's a part of me that wants to be honest so that I don't have to be a hypocrite. But I'm in no rush to do anything that'll help Hisoka battle Chrollo sooner. Chrollo is ruthless and Hisoka's too good an opponent for him not to cheat in some way. I wish I could believe Hisoka was strong enough, smart enough, brutal enough, but I'm not going to take that chance. Not now that we might actually be working toward something together. "No. Haven't heard a thing," I say, looking through the trees.

"Guess that would've made things too easy if you had," he says stretching his back.

We need to change the subject. Something that takes the attention off me. "Do you really want to kill Gon some day?"

"If he stays on the same trajectory, I don't see why not," Hisoka responds.

"He might make a good ally when he's older. Again, you can do more with people when they're alive versus dead," I say.

"You can't save everyone, Oby."

"It's not just about them. It's about your safety too."

"I've been doing pretty well so far."

"So far. But you're attracted to fighting people who are as strong as you, if not stronger. One day that might catch up to you," I tell him.

"Then it would be an honor to meet a worthy opponent who could grant the perfect death," he says.

"Is that all you want out of life? The perfect death," I ask.

He chuckles. "I don't fight with the intent to die, but to win. Everytime. I'm sure you knew that about me from the start."

"Gon and Killua are my friends."

"They're a little young for you, aren't they?" he asks sarcastically.

"I'd trust them with my life. Anyone capable of saving me will always be my friend."

"Do you normally hide from friends?"

"I just didn't want them to see—"

"Us together," Hisoka finishes.

"No. I wouldn't hang around anyone I was embarrassed to be seen with. I just...I had a rough day with them yesterday and I know how they feel about you and I just don't want to deal with any of that today."

He nods as he considers what I said.

"They're really great kids, Hisoka. I really do think you could get on friendlier terms with them. If you tried. If you got to know them, you might not want to kill them."

"Getting to know someone better doesn't take away the urge to kill them."

"It did with me, didn't it?"

The back of his hand finds mine. "No, it didn't. As long as you remain a worthy opponent, I will always have a taste for your blood. I will always want your death to belong to me. But I also know I want other things with you."

I slowly wrap two of my fingers around two of his. "What kind of things?"

He stops walking and looks at the ground. "I'm trying to figure that out. But I want to clarify something with you."

My stomach tenses. Is this it, the moment I've been waiting for? I'm not even sure if I'm ready for it. Am I really stupid enough to believe he'll say that he wants to be with me? Him? The lone wolf? This anxiety and excitement are so high school it disgusts me. "What is it?"

He gently cups my chin between his palm and looks me dead in my eyes. The sun begins to shine between us. "Before whatever this is goes any further, you should know that you cannot change me, so please don't try. This is who I've always been. And regardless of what you may think of me, I happen to like myself as I am. So whatever you do, don't do it with the intent of trying to save me. Who I decide to go after is my business and I will eliminate anyone who gets in my way. Is that clear?"

I can already feel myself lying again just by the way I look at him. He told me I needed more practice at lying, guess now's my chance. "Yes," I whisper. Even though he told me he still has the desire to kill me and the boy I'm sworn to protect, all I can feel is my want of him. How fucked is that? I never listened to a man if his wants went against my own. Yet something about Hisoka makes me want to listen even when I know I can't. I don't recognize myself right now, but it's okay, because I don't want to be who I was anymore. I want to see who I can be with him.

His nails dig into my chin. "Good girl." He bites my mouth and grazes his teeth against my bottom lip. Just as I feel myself melting against him, a truck surges toward us.

*

Hisoka pushes me out the way and hops backwards to get away from the car. The back of my head smacks against a tree and a knot of pain forms. I don't have time to wince from the pain before the car comes at me. I jump up to one of the branches and the jeep crashes into the trunk. Idiots. I drop down onto the roof and knock the front window in. Several men with guns start firing. I jump down to the ground to avoid their bullets. I'll either have to wait for them to run out of ammo for a close attack or figure out how to attack from a distance. I look around at the wood and rocks around me, making the quickest decision.

I concentrate my energy into the earth, black and white shadows fill my eyes as I connect with my aura. I lift pieces of bark from the tree and direct them to slit the throats of most of the men inside. The driver's still alive for interrogating. He falls out of the car, trying to crawl away from me. Pathetic. I jump on his back and direct shards of wood into the center of both his hands. He cries out, but it falls on deaf ears. "Who sent you?"

Saliva runs from his mouth to the ground. "I can't. If I tell you, he'll kill me."

I dig my nails into the back of his head. "And I'll kill you right now if you don't."

As the man pants desperately for his life, I recognize his side profile. I pick up his face to get a better look, recognizing his hazel eyes and graying beard from a few nights ago. I rip out the wooden shard from his right wrist and look at it. "Shut up!" I command when he howls. When I look, there's a tattoo of three interlocked triangles. One of Mattheo's men. I remember him watching as his boss bent me over a table and was about to rape me. Now look at him. Laying on his stomach. Prostrate and begging for mercy. I pick up his head and lean down near his cheek. "It's amazing to me that people like you don't care about pain until it's happening to you."

"Please, I was just following orders."

I let his head fall back on the ground. "So am I. Now where is he?"

He cries and whines a bit, closing his eyes and muttering something. When I listen close it's obvious that he's praying. Really? The hypocrisy. Before I make another move, a card cuts through his jugular.

I look up to find Hisoka leaning against a tree with his arms folded. "You were taking too long."

I stand up and walk over the dead guard's body. "I was interrogating him."

"You knew he wasn't going to give a good answer. Use logic, not emotions. How do you know him?"

"One of Mattheo's men."

Hisoka tilts his head and looks at the man's listless eyes as blood saturates the ground. "Looks the type. While you were handling the truck, I decided to scout around and see if there were any others."

"Are there?"

"Of course. He wants you dead, not to send you an invitation to tea."

"How many?"

"A few dozen. They're coming from each direction. They should be here any minute."

"So, while you were busy scouting them out, you couldn't make time to knock off a few?"

Hisoka smirks. "I thought it'd be more fun if we worked together."

I sigh as I turn on my nen. "How did they even know we're here?"

Violet flames spiral around Hisoka. "Mattheo strikes me as a man who has spies across the island. Some fisherman may have caught sight of us last night or this morning."

A sea of red dotted lights grow nearer to our bodies.

"I'll take the north and west sides. You can handle south and east," I say.

He brandishes several cards in hand. "Sounds like a plan."

I jump up and run along the trees as does Hisoka. The forest sprays with gunfire and flying wood. He bolts down as quickly as he came up. A blur that slashes away at the assassins' faces. Have to hand it to him, he is quick and efficient. I use my power to pick up a few sizable rocks and use them as a mallet. Emotional my ass. This is just business. But Mattheo will be another story.

I jump down when the gunfire dies down, continuing to smash every skull and chest cavity near me. When I'm not looking one of the men comes up behind me and tries to strangle me. His grip is so strong I can already feel it in my eyes, like he's bursting them. Don't panic, you'll get through this, I tell myself. But surprisingly no traumatic memories flash before my eyes. I finally feel free, like I have a handle on the past and not the other way around. I feel free to be the warrior I used to be. A small spear like piece of wood lays near my foot on the floor. I use my nen to pick it up shoot through the guy's eye and skull. He falls before even knowing he's dead.

I send the spear around piercing the rest of the men's faces, a splash of blood and grunts for each one before they die. It's not the prettiest sight it gets the job done. But I stop at the last assassin. He's young, obviously this is his first job. Looks about 17-18. His hands shake around the gun's trigger but he's too scared to move. I almost feel the urge to spank him for his bad behavior instead of kill him. He backs up until he bumps into a tree and has nowhere to go.

"It's okay," I tell him, stroking the side of his head. He initially flinches from me but eventually starts to calm down. "I'm not going to hurt you. Just tell me where Mattheo is."

He whimpers and breaks down. "He's hiding out in Soufrabi. Please, don't..."

"Thank you," I say and move out of the way, "Go ahead."

He looks at me as if to see if I'm sure and around to make sure nothing else will jump out at him before running away. I wait for him to gain some distance before raising the spike back up. His leans against the tree playing with his cards, his face somewhere between disappointment and the brink of being intrigued. "Are you going to finish it, or not?" he asks.

"Of course," I say, "I just want the shot to be perfect. Told him I wouldn't hurt him." With the flick of my forefinger the spike surges forward and I hear the bloody rip through his medulla oblongata, part of his brain stem. He's dead before he hits the ground. No pain.

Hisoka gives a small moan of approval and approaches me. He stares at me, then runs one of his long nails along my neck. He brings his finger back to his mouth. There's blood on it. Once he tastes it, he grabs me by the back of my head, pulls it backs licks the rest of the blood off my neck. Is foreplay to him? Gross. I'm definitely not gonna have sex in amidst a mass grave.

All of a sudden I hear voices and people traipsing through leaves. "Are you sure we're supposed to meet them here?" a familiar voice asks.

"I never mess up coordinates," another voice says.

"Who are they?" I whisper.

"Why don't you jump up and see?" Hisoka responds.

What is he up to? I turn on In and travel up a tree, hiding in the shrubbery. I look around and spot Nobunaga and Machi looking around in the shade. What the hell are they doing out here? Suddenly there's a shadow behind me. I turn to see a figure standing behind me. A boy in a girl's kimono. Before I can ask who he is, he takes out a samurai sword and slashes the part of the branch I'm standing on.

I brace myself to jump away, but this little shit is fast and launches a kick against my sternum. It takes all the air out of my chest as I fall backward. My ears fill with a hissing sound as the branch clashes with others before hitting the ground. The scrapes against my limbs are already sore. Twigs and leaves are tangled throughout my hair which has broken free from its band.

"Well if it isn't Mother Nature herself," Nobunaga says as he walks over and looks down at me. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I was gonna ask you the same thing," I say as I shakily stand up.

He grabs me by my face. "I asked you a question."

I smack his hands away and back up. "I'm here on a mission that has nothing to do with you." As I back up, I bump into another body. Machi's.

"Why won't you just die already?" Machi says exasperated.

I turn around and look at her. "It might be easier if you just stayed out of my way," I look her up and down, "but I do recall seeing you a few nights ago when I could've gotten killed. Why do you have it out for me?"

Machi rolls her eyes and folds her arms. "Where's the nen exorcist?"

"What makes you think I kn—"

Machi slaps me with the back of her hand. The hit's quick and full of disrespect. I get the sense that she's angry about something, but I don't know what I've done to offend her. "The only reason you're still alive is because one of Mattheo's spies told us they saw you with the exorcist, now where is he?"

"Why the hell are you working with Mattheo?"

A blade clutches my throat from behind. "We'll be asking the questions," Nobunaga says in ear, "You should feel lucky I don't flay you alive for what you did to Uvogin."

I turn my head slightly to face him. "I didn't do anything to him that he didn't want me to do."

"You lying little whore." He kicks me in the back. "Uvogin would've never asked to die."

I catch my balance so I don't fall over. "I didn't kill him. Nor am I in any way involved with his death. But if you'd like to visit his grave, I can tell you where it is." Though I meant those words to be comforting, I realize how suspicious they sound now that I've heard them out loud.

Nobunaga narrows his eyes at me. "You may not have done the deed yourself, but you know more than you're letting on. Where is his killer hiding?"

"I genuinely don't know." That's the truth.

Nobunaga raises his sword to strike, but Machi blocks the blow by wrapping her threads around the blade and ripping it away from him. "Calm down! We're here to help Chrollo, not avenge the dead." Machi throws several other thread that tie my hands and ankles up, making my body form a X between two trees. Why the hell wasn't I using gyo to see what she was doing? "Now, I'm going to ask you one more time. Where is the nen exorcist?"

Just as I feel the urge to spit in the little cunt's face, Hisoka finally makes an appearance, punching Nobunaga unconscious and tying up the crossdressing boy with bungee gum before walking over to us. "If she says she doesn't know, then she doesn't know."

Machi's face softens, for a split second it even looks like she's about to cry. But her face quickly hardens with rage. "You've got your head so far up her ass you can't even tell when she's lying to you."

"Who among us hasn't lied to the other?" he says, walking closer to her. "Besides, she has no reason to lie about that."

That's awfully naïve of him, I think to myself.

"Does your little girlfriend know you're still working with us," she pushes herself against his chest, "or that you're still fucking me?"

My eyes sharpen, it feels like the world stood still for a moment while also cracking something inside me. Is what she said true or is she just trying to get under my skin? It's too late to hide the shock on my face. I wish I didn't give the satisfaction. My skin crawls and I know I've got to get out of this.

Hisoka pushes Machi away with a displeased look on his face. "I expected more from you."

Her arms droop as she looks up at him. Her focus isn't on the threads anymore, so it should be easier to get free. I rip my hands and feet out her thread and grab her by the back of the head. I know what you're thinking. That I'm doing this because I'm jealous of her, that I'm taking my frustration with him out on her, but that's not true. I won't be able to talk to Hisoka if she's in the way. And...I really just don't like this bitch.

The last thing I hear her say is "What does she have that I don't?" and all I can think is For starters I'm not evil to everyone. As I grab her, it's like she was ready for me and flipped me over and through several trees til I land near a cliff with a 100-foot drop. I gotta give it to the little wench – she's strong. As she flies toward me, my first are ready. I block her punches and elbow her in the neck and face. Such a pretty pixie face, too bad I'm about to ruin it. I punch hard enough to shatter her nose. It hurts so bad she can't even cry out. Machi grabs me by my hair and bangs me against the ground like she's playing whack-a-mole. I swing around and sock in the stomach with my foot. I watch blood spray out of her mouth before knocking her to the ground. She tries to reach for her threads, but I step on her wrist til I hear the bone crack.

"That's enough," Hisoka says in the sternest voice I've ever heard from him.

I reach for her opposite wrist and snatch the pincushion off. "Why? Do you actually care about this little twat monster?"

"You've made your point. There's no need to kill her."

"I'm not trying to kill her," I pick her up by her neck and look into her swollen eyes, "I'm just letting her know not to fuck with me again."

"Put her down. Now!" he yells at me.

"The same thing he's doing to me, he do to you one day," Machi crooks while looking at me.

I look at him and see something that resembles concern. So...she was telling the truth. "Sure," I answer lifting her with all my might and throwing her over the cliff. Her screams carry on the horizon along with the shock of birds in the sky. I turn back to him to see what he's going to do. Will he rescue her? Will he try to punish me? Instead, he just stares at me, mildly irritated and inconvenienced. "You could've killed her."

"Relax, she won't die. She's too bitter for that. But it will take her a while to heal from that beatdown."

"So, are you mad at me?" he asks.

Seriously? Doesn't care enough to ask about her, just goes straight to himself. "Was she telling the truth. About the two of you?"

He looks down at the ground and nods his head.

Wow, is this shame? That's new for him. I bite my lip. "So was I just a way to pass the time for you?"

"I didn't expect her to say anything to you."

"So you're only issue is the fact that you were exposed? Well, that makes me feel better." I can't stand the sight of his face right now. I start to walk off when he jogs to catch up with me.

"Look, we never agreed to being in a relationship, much less anything exclusive—"

Before he utters more of his stupid ass response I knock him down, which actually stuns him. I point a finger in his direction. "I thought we could be adults about this. Be honest about how we felt. Get closer. But here you were fucking her and who know who else."

"There is no one else—"

"How do you expect me to believe that? You've kept this from me for I don't know how long. And if you didn't think anything was wrong with it, why didn't you tell me?"

He holds his jaw to help straighten it before he responds. "I was just trying to protect you."

I snort. How bold and stupid this man is. "You weren't trying to protect anyone but your damn self. Stay away from me."

As I walk and try to focus on the crunching of tree leaves beneath my feet, I can already hear him picking himself up to follow. "What, do you want me to tell you I'm sorry? Fine, I'm sorry. Intimacy and romance don't come naturally to me. Oby, wait—" as soon as he reaches for my arm I smack his hand and then his face. But with each hit, I just get angrier. I want to break, hurt him like he hurt me. "Please don't do this to us."

I hit him so hard, two of his teeth shatter and pop out of mouth. He falls down again. But when I try to get away he grabs my foot and tries to drag to him. "I'm not going to stop—"

I kick him in the throat, making him wheeze, he tries to restrain but I'm too pissed off for that. I block his advances, pick him up and throw him in the air. Hisoka tries to stop his fall with bungee gum, but I raise up a boulder and launch it into his torso. I hear it, him, falling and breaking through trees but I don't care. I'm not looking back. If he wants to be with Machi, she's down there waiting for him.

"Book" I command. I pick the first locationwhere I know someone and transport. I can't stay here any longer and I don'thave it in me to travel on foot right now. I don't want to feel this anger orpain or the tears that are coming. I don't want to admit that I was wrong abouthim, that he hurt me...after everything I said, everything I did just to be withhim. I'm such an idiot.